Finding Home

20. Caleb

Chapter 20

Caleb

“ A ubrey .”

I can’t keep myself from groaning out her name, again and again, loudly, as my hand works my aching shaft. And this time, it’s not a ploy to get Aubrey to come to me, since I’ve accepted that’s not going to happen. It’s an involuntary prayer to the universe to have some mercy on my throbbing cock and aching balls.

Everything about Aubrey turns me on. Every look. Every touch. Even the tongue lashings she delivers so deftly. Always, deservedly, by the way. Fucking hell, no matter what that woman says or does, she lights a forest fire inside me. One I can’t extinguish, no matter how hard I try. I’m a ball of flames in Aubrey’s presence. A forest fire, whenever I even think about my cock burrowed deep inside her. It’s something I think about a lot these days. On a running loop. God help me, the woman is lighter fluid. Fuel to my raging flames.

I groan out Aubrey’s name, again, as my pleasure spirals and threatens to consume me, body and soul. And, suddenly, without warning, my bedroom door flies open and Aubrey magically appears in the doorframe. Only this time, unlike before, she doesn’t turn and run away. She strides toward me, breathing hard, like her hair’s on fire and I’m the cool lake she’s intending to plunge herself into to save herself.

“I’m here to take over that job,” she murmurs, her dark eyes trained on my dick. “If you’ll let me.”

Am I dreaming? Am I dead? “Yes,” I choke out, elated to realize this is very, very real.

She pulls off her top as she moves, revealing the two most exquisite, perkiest tits I’ve ever beheld, and by the time she reaches me in my bed, her shirt is on the ground and my lust is a pyre that’s consuming every available drop of oxygen in the room.

As I pull her lips to mine, I’m a human back draft. A wall of flames singeing the walls and scorching the ceiling. My fingers dig greedily into Aubrey’s bare back as my lips collide with hers. I’ve waited ten lifetimes for this kiss, waded through dense jungles and traversed steep mountains for it; and now, every cell in my body, every drop of blood in my veins, is exploding with intense yearning, relief, and euphoria.

My tongue greedily finds Aubrey’s, and every nerve ending electrocutes at the burst of sensations. She’s sweet to the taste. Honey mixed with vanilla. Her lips are as soft as they are hungry. Her skin beneath my fingertips, warm and smooth.

Our kiss is an atomic bomb going off, an all-consuming frisson that rattles my bones and burns away every last remaining drop of restraint. I curl my fingers into her soft hair as I deepen the kiss, and she responds in kind, her fingers tightening in my hair on the back of my head.

Aubrey’s hand finds my hard shaft as our mouths continue their mutual assaults. I groan loudly at her unexpected touch—her greedy, fucking glorious touch—and she whispers hoarsely for me to keep it down.

“Raine’s across the hallway,” she reminds me, her breathing labored.

It’s yet another turn-on. A reminder that we shouldn’t . That Aubrey’s contraband to me. Contraband pussy, as my friends and I call all manner of forbidden fruit. She came to me against her better judgment. Because she couldn’t stay away. Couldn’t resist me, any more than I can resist her.

“Do you have a condom?” Aubrey grits out.

“I bought a pack in Billings,” I confess, grinning like a shark. “When you went to grab those nighttime pull-ups across the store.”

“You presumptuous bastard,” Aubrey whispers with heat, pressing the crotch of her panties against my hard, aching bulge. But it’s clear enough from her facial expression, she’s damned glad I presumed.

“I’ll get them soon,” I say. “First things first, I’m hungry for some contraband pussy.”

“ Contraband ?”

I don’t explain myself.

I guide her onto her back and pull off her panties like a starving man unwrapping a cheeseburger, and then shudder violently when her deliciousness is revealed to me in all its glory. I’ve dreamed about eating this pussy. Fucking this pussy. Jerked off to fantasies of this pussy sitting on my face and squirting with pleasure. And now, this pussy is mine for the taking—and even hotter than I imagined it.

Watering at the mouth, I widen Aubrey’s thighs, opening her up to me like a blooming flower, and then groan much too loudly at the sight .

“Not so loud,” Aubrey whispers, her words coming out between pants of anticipation.

I’m dizzy with lust now. Breathing hard, I stroke the outside of her pussy gently, feeling desperate to lick her. Taste her. Fuck her. Claim her. And Aubrey writhes and moans loudly at my touch.

“What happened to ‘not so loud?’” I tease.

“Fuck off.”

We both laugh.

I begin stroking her with one hand, while caressing one of her perfect tits with the other. And when my mouth is watering too much to resist, I take her peaked, hard nipple into my mouth and devour her, prompting Aubrey to loudly lose her fucking mind.

I dip two fingers inside her, and my dick jolts with pleasure to discover she’s already ready for my cock, just this fast. Soaking wet, warm, and swollen. But I’m not going in yet. I’ve got a meal to eat, first.

With a low moan, I crawl between Aubrey’s legs and begin voraciously kissing and licking the sensitive flesh surrounding her bullseye without ever hitting the mark, while sliding my fingers in and out. When it feels like she’s reached the peak of this particular mountain, I move on to the next. Devouring her bullseye. My breathing loud and ragged, I zero in on her swollen, pink bud while stroking her G-spot with two precise fingers.

Instantly, she goes nuts on me in the best possible way. In fact, only ten seconds into my new tactic, Aubrey releases a groan that’s so fucking loud and tormented, it’s my turn to remind her about Raine across the hallway. Only this time, in earnest. Not as a tease.

When another loud moan escapes her, Aubrey squeaks and grabs a pillow, which she promptly shoves over her face. As she growls and roars into the pillow, I double down on what I’m doing between her legs, until she’s writhing and gyrating so damned much, it feels like she’s having a seizure.

As my tongue laps and lathes, I feel blissed out. Drugged. Shit-faced. Black-out drunk. Far more so than when I’ve ingested actual chemicals into my body. For months now, I’ve been craving my favorite whiskey and tequila. Itching to smoke my favorite strains of weed. Hell, during rehab, I’ve regularly had dreams about snorting mountains of coke, and that’s not even my thing. Anything I could imagine that might transport me to another dimension—one where grief, regret, and shame aren’t ravaging my soul at all times. But now, come to find out, there’s something far better than all of it. Light years better. Aubrey Fucking Capshaw.

My eyes roll back, as I revel in the sweet juices covering my lips, tongue, and beard. A second later, Aubrey digs her nails into my bare shoulders with force, arches her back, and releases an orgasm that practically vibrates against my mouth on her clit while squeezing my three fingers inside her.

I rip the pillow off her face, desperate to see Aubrey’s expression when she comes; and the “O face” she serves up doesn’t disappoint. In fact, it exceeds my wildest fantasies.

My god, Aubrey’s moonlit face as she comes is a work of art. The most beautiful thing I’ve seen in my life, made extra special by the knowledge that she’s coming for me. Because of me. Because she came to me, against her better judgment. I’ve always believed drumming for thousands of adoring fans was the ultimate high. But then Aubrey came along and proved me dead wrong about that. This . This is the ultimate high .

As Aubrey’s moans subside, I turn her sweaty body onto its side and do something I’ve been wanting to do for quite some time: I bite her fucking ass cheek. Not too hard. This isn’t an assault. Just a little nibble. Enough to make her gasp in surprise and brand her ass as mine and make her giggle and sigh.

I’m feral now.

Losing my goddamned mind.

I grab a condom from the nightstand, get my aching cock wrapped up in record speed, and return to Aubrey’s naked, slack body on my bed. With a shaky exhale, I crawl on top of her, rest her calves on my shoulders, feel for my target, and burrow myself deep inside her, all the way.

As my body fills Aubrey’s, we both moan at the delectable sensation and collide in a deep, hungry kiss as I begin thrusting, in and out. I fuck her without holding back. Deep. Until my balls are flush with her body with every stroke. She feels divinely designed for my body. Created specifically for me. She’s fucking perfect.

Our bodies synch up into a grunting, frenzied rhythm; and soon, we’re both out of our heads. Setting fire to the bedsheets and to the crescent moon and shimmering lake outside my bedroom window. We’re moving as one. We’re in the zone.

I didn’t know it was possible for me to want someone like this, ever again. The last time it happened, the only other time, was fifteen years ago, when I was a dumb, selfish kid. A dumbass who didn’t grasp the rarity of it. The preciousness. I assumed it’d happen, again and again, over the course of my long lifetime, as easily as snapping my fingers or calling room service. I assumed it’d be that easy again, simply because I’d been lucky enough to stumble cluelessly into true love, so fucking young, despite myself. But when I never felt that way again, not even close, and the years dragged on, I accepted my fate. No more love for Caleb. Never again.

But now, suddenly, here I am at thirty-five, after a lifetime of being alone and lonely, after a decade and a half of being everyone’s third wheel and plus-one, I’m finally feeling that same kind of electricity again. That same kind of magic. Only better this time. So much fucking better. Because I’m not taking it for granted.

Fifteen years ago, I carelessly threw my ex’s love away with both hands, in favor of fulfilling my stupid rockstar fantasies. I figured she’d be waiting for me, when I got back from tour. Or if not then, when I was finally ready to commit, whenever that might be.

This time, though, I’m not going to make the same mistakes.

Wait.

Shit.

So, that’s it? I’m officially falling in love with Aubrey?

Yep.

I am.

I can’t deny it.

Don’t even want to deny it.

I’m falling for her, hard. Mind, body, heart, and soul. And it feels so fucking good.

As the truth settles into my chest, I begin fucking Aubrey, even harder, with even more fervor, which then causes our mutual pleasure to spiral even higher, into the stratosphere.

I fuck her till she’s growling and gripping my shoulders. My neck. Chest. Hair. Beard.

I fuck her till a torrent of whimpers and moans pours out of her mouth, till a stream of hoarse whispers escapes mine.

I fuck her till she’s running her hands feverishly over the planes and grooves of my back, shoulders, and arms. Till she’s gripping my bare ass and digging her fingernails into me and begging me not to stop.

I fuck her till I’m on the cusp of losing it, till I’m whispering into her ear that she’s perfect and feels like heaven. I tell her I’ve waited a lifetime to feel this fucking good. “You’ve ruined me for anyone else,” I confess. And a second later, Aubrey unleashes an orgasm with my cock burrowed deep inside her, all the way, thereby hurtling me into a blissful release of my own.

As I come, I snap my hips forward, driving myself as deep inside her as I can get. So fucking deep, I’m surprised I’m not physically splitting the poor girl in two.

Streaks of light.

Stars.

They’re lighting up my blurred vision like a fireworks display, as my body empties itself into her. Well, into the condom, anyway. I swear, I’ve never regretted wearing a condom more in my life. After news of Claudia’s pregnancy reached me, I swore I’d never have sex again without a condom. But in this moment, the idea of making a baby with Aubrey doesn’t freak me out. It thrills me.

When my body stops shuddering, I pause to catch my breath, while Aubrey does the same underneath me. That was the most intense, outrageously addicting sexual experience of my life. Hands down. I don’t know if I’m truly falling in love with Aubrey, like my body’s telling me. It’s distinctly possible the intensity of my feelings is purely situational. The product of my blooming love for Raine mixed with my gratitude to Aubrey for making that love possible. But lying here now on top of Aubrey, it sure feels like it.

I guess the only thing I know for sure is I want to have sex with Aubrey again and again. Tonight. Tomorrow night. The night after that. As much as humanly possible, every chance I get, while my brain figures out if my body’s telling the truth about my feelings . . . or if it’s simply hopelessly horny and deeply confused.