Her Fearless Ronin (The Syndicates #4)

Chapter 14

Jiro

F uck, she’s beautiful. That was my first thought when she stepped into the café. Her hair caught the light in a way that made it look like a cascade of golden lilac, and her blue eyes held depths of emotion that I knew I had no right to read.

I leaned back, my irritation growing. But even in the midst of my annoyance, I couldn’t deny the magnetic pull she had on me. She turned her gaze toward me, and I watched as her smile, so warm and genuine, faded, replaced with uncertainty and apprehension.

How could she think that everything I did was driven by pity? There was no pity in the way I looked at Hope, in the way I wanted her, in the way I saw a fierce warrior spirit beneath her delicate exterior. She was as far from a damsel in distress as one could be.

It certainly wasn’t pity that drove me to kneel in front of her, to explore her body with a hunger that bordered on desperation. Pity was nowhere in the equation when I found myself lost in the pleasures she ignited within me.

She swallowed, her posture shifting as she approached me. There she was, my beautiful warrior, caught in the cross fire of our tangled emotions.

“Where’s Oda?” Her voice was like a sharp needle piercing the air between us, breaking through the charged silence.

“Otherwise occupied,” I replied curtly, my gaze fixed on her. The truth was far from that simple, though.

Locked in the bathroom of my hotel room, to be precise. It was his fault, really. After their call, I had explicitly told him not to show up for his coffee date with Hope. But the fool had defied me, asserting his independence. He had a streak of stubbornness that was infuriating, and now he would deal with the consequences.

“I didn’t expect to see you here.”

“Clearly,” I muttered in response, unable to keep the bitterness out of my tone. I was pretty sure she would not have come if she’d known.

She took a seat across from me, and the atmosphere seemed to thicken with tension. “Is everything alright?” Her question was laced with genuine concern, but it grated on my nerves.

“Is everything alright?” I repeated, my voice dripping with sarcasm. “Well, I must say, Hope, I’ve had better days.”

I watched her squirm in her seat, her discomfort evident. She seemed to struggle with her words as if grappling with something she wanted to say but couldn’t quite articulate.

I leaned in slightly, my gaze locked onto hers, daring her to speak her mind.

“Look, I… I know you’re upset about what I said on the phone,” she finally started, her words tentative.

“Upset? Is that what you think I am? Upset?” My voice came out sharper than I intended, the frustration within me boiling over. It wasn’t just about her words on the phone. It was about everything—the tangled mess we had become, the conflicting emotions that seemed to constantly swirl between us.

She looked down, swallowing visibly. Her next words were so soft that I almost missed them. “I didn’t mean to sound ungrateful.”

“Do you think that’s what I’m upset about?” I shot back, my tone laced with exasperation. Her words were missing the mark, like trying to mend a deep wound with a Band-Aid.

“So you are upset!”

Her response sounded like an accusation. The tension in the air was almost tangible, crackling between us like a live wire. I had half a mind to grab her face and kiss her until she couldn’t remember her name.

I threw her a narrowed gaze. “Be ungrateful as much as you like. Be a little diva princess. Hell! You deserve to be! What bothered me is the low opinion you have of me.”

Her eyes widened in shock, and I knew I had struck a nerve.

“Jiro, no. You—” She shook her head, her voice wavering with emotion. “I could never think badly of you! You’re—have you seen to what length you went to help me?”

A bitter laugh escaped me before I could stop it. She didn’t know I was the opposite of the knight in shining armor, and I wasn’t even referring to my past as an executioner or my grim connection to her sister’s death. No, it was the fact that I wanted her for myself, to relish her presence, her touch, and to desperately make her fall for me like I was falling for her, even when I had no right to claim her.

I was not a knight. I was a selfish bastard.

I leaned in, my gaze unwavering as it traced the contours of her face, resting momentarily on her inviting lips. “Tell me, koibito , do you believe, for even a moment, it was pity that drove me so deep into you that I could barely tell where you ended and where I began?”

Her face flushed, and an unexpected gasp escaped her as she noticed the waitress approaching to take her order. I leaned back in my seat, a smirk playing on my lips.

Hope glared at me, her lips pressed into a thin line.

She quickly gave her order to the blushing waitress, who obviously heard everything I had said and turned toward me.

“Was all of this truly necessary?” Her tone was reprimanding, reminiscent of a strict teacher scolding a wayward student.

“I believe it was,” I replied, my voice low, my dick twitching at her tone.

Hmmm, maybe that would be a game she and I could play one day… I shook my head. There could not be another time.

“Jiro, I—” Her words faltered, and I caught the shift in her gaze, her eyes moving past me toward the door. I frowned, curiosity getting the better of me. Her reaction changed to one of surprise, her eyes widening. My chest tightened at the sight, a sudden surge of jealousy rising within me.

I swiveled in my chair, almost unable to stop myself from reacting to whatever—or whoever—had caught her attention. My jaw clenched as my eyes landed on the newcomer, and the jealousy within me flared even hotter.

Fuck my life.

It was Hoka, dressed impeccably in a designer suit, his infant son strapped to his chest in a display of unmatched fatherly cool. But what set me off was the way Hope was looking at him—with a certain appreciation that I couldn’t quite stomach.

The collective admiration of every woman in the café was practically palpable.

Hoka removed his aviator sunglasses, his gaze locking onto mine with a knowing glint in his eyes and a damn smirk playing on his lips. That smug bastard was definitely enjoying this situation.

“Do you know him?” Hope’s voice was a soft whisper, carrying both curiosity and something else that grated on my nerves.

“I do,” I muttered, my jaw tightening as Hoka made his way to the counter to order a drink. “It’s a married man. And remember when I told you I’d be the only yakuza you’ll ever have? I meant that,” I added, my tone laced with irritation, throwing her a glare for emphasis.

A pink hue tinted her cheeks as she smiled, her eyes dancing with mischief. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you’re jealous. And I believe you’re not a yakuza anymore, are you?”

I grunted, my irritation turning into something that felt dangerously close to jealousy. “Keep testing me, Hope Myers, and you’ll end up over my knees, butt naked, with my handprint across that tempting ass of yours.”

She twisted on her seat, capturing her plump bottom lip between her teeth, and a jolt of desire shot through me. The way she looked at me, the challenge in her eyes—she wanted to push my buttons, to see how far she could take it.

My little vixen… Shit, she’d be the death of me.

Hoka walked over to us, his coffee in hand and a knowing glint in his eyes, and somehow I knew karma was going to hit me like a freight train for all the shit I gave him about his relationship with Violet, and I knew I deserved it.

“Jiro,” he said with a nod before turning his attention toward Hope, a smile that was almost blinding forming on his lips. “Hope Myers…” he trailed off, his voice smooth like silk. “I’ve heard so much about you. I’m Hoka Nishimura. I’m sure Jiro must have shared a lot about me.” He practically purred the words.

Oh, give me a fucking break!

Her reaction was like a train wreck I couldn’t look away from. Wide-eyed and agape, she opened and closed her mouth like a fish out of water.

“Close your mouth, sweetheart,” I snapped, my irritation obvious but also knowing that I was just adding fuel to Hoka’s smugness. “You’re drooling over a married father.”

“I…” She blinked a few times, her face turning a shade of crimson. Irritation surged within me at her reaction. Her blushing was mine. “Yes, hi, sorry, sir. Hoka and baby. It’s just… hello,” she finished with a huff, clearly flustered.

I scowled at the table. Was this what I was reduced to? Maybe Oda was right—I was becoming the damn caveman he claimed I was.

Oda! I narrowed my eyes and looked back at Hoka, who just sat down.

“How did you find me?”

Hoka laughed, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “Nice to see you too after all this time. You look well.”

I rolled my eyes. “Oda?” I ventured.

Hoka nodded, the grin on his face growing even wider. “Yes, I came to see you at your hotel, got a key card, and found our boy seething. You locked him in the bathroom.”

I didn’t even bother asking him how he managed to get a key to my room. But I could feel Hope’s curious eyes on me, and it made the skin at the back of my neck prickle with embarrassment. I reached up to rub my neck, a reflexive response that only seemed to amuse Hoka even more, his grin bordering on triumphant.

“You locked him in the bathroom?” Hope’s gasp pulled my attention back to her.

I shrugged, not willing to get into the details. “He wasn’t listening,” I mumbled, not sure whether I wanted to murder Hoka or Oda first.

The baby’s cooing interrupted the tension, and he stretched his arms toward Hope, diverting everyone’s attention to him—a welcome respite for me.

“What’s your name, handsome?” Hope’s voice was soft, her smile gentle as she extended a finger toward Yuko.

The baby cooed again, his tiny fingers grasping hers.

“Yuko,” Hoka replied, his gaze never leaving her face. I could practically see the assessment happening, even if she appeared oblivious. Hoka Nishimura was sizing up my woman.

She’s not your woman, Jiro. She deserves better. My conscience’s reminder stung.

“He’s so beautiful,” Hope breathed, her fingers gently brushing against Yuko’s cheek. Her excitement was palpable, and it was utterly endearing.

“Yes, he is,” Hoka agreed, his pride evident. “Do you want to hold him?”

“Oh!” Hope’s eyes lit up with awe and eagerness, her hands finding their way to her chest. She looked absolutely radiant. “Can I?”

Hoka nodded, skillfully loosening the straps that held Yuko. I wasn’t sure if she fully grasped the significance of Hoka’s gesture. Allowing someone to hold his son, whom he cherished deeply, was not a trivial matter. It was bigger than even I could understand.

“Oh, who’s the cutest boy in the whole world?!” Hope beamed, gently bouncing Yuko on her knees. At that moment, she was completely lost to the world, absorbed in the joy of playing with the heir of the yakuza.

“I wanted to show you a glimpse of what your future could be like,” Hoka whispered, leaning toward me with a smirk that made my blood boil with want.

I sighed, frustration tugging at my composure. “Why are you even here, and why with the kid?” I directed my words at Hoka, though my gaze remained locked on Hope and Yuko.

“Violet wanted to come to Seattle with me, and she’s getting a well-deserved spa break. Besides, it is my child, too,” Hoka replied, a hint of defensiveness lacing his words. “We were two to make him, Jiro. Sharing the responsibilities equally is only fair.”

I snorted, unable to fully conceal my skepticism. “Is that you talking or Violet? Because it sounds an awful lot like your wife.”

Hoka’s glare was swift and potent. “It doesn’t make it any less true.”

Shaking my head, I pushed my irritation aside. “You’re wasting our time here. Valdez hasn’t even reached out to me yet.”

“No, but he called me .”

My eyes narrowed; Valdez was a crafty bastard. “And what did he say?” I asked through gritted teeth.

Hoka shrugged, taking a sip of his coffee. “You know, the usual. He painted it as a friendly reminder of our shared past, and then he proceeded to politely ask that you stay away from business that supposedly has nothing to do with the yakuza.” He sighed. “I told him that was not possible because you had a… vested interest in what could turn into collateral damage,” he added, letting his eyes linger on Hope.

Hope’s inquisitive glance in our direction didn’t go unnoticed, and my frustration deepened.

“What else?”

Hoka looked directly at her, his expression unwavering. “He agreed to meet us on Saturday in a mutually agreeable location. He’ll give me the details tomorrow.” He turned toward Hope, “And you don’t mind spending the day with my wife at the Four Seasons, do you? Violet can’t wait to meet you.”

Hope stopped bouncing Yuko and glanced at me with a questioning look. She was sharp, my woman. She knew that Hoka’s offer wasn’t just about hospitality—it was his way of ensuring her safety. I felt a spark of pride—she was seeking my approval before accepting Hoka’s proposal.

I gave her a nod with a smile, feeling like a winner. She was seeking me out for reassurance, and that meant the world to me.

“How could I say no?” She started to bounce Yuko again. “It’s very kind of you.”

Our conversation continued for a few more minutes, covering trivial topics such as the hotel they were staying at and their plans for the next day, yet I knew that more pressing discussions awaited us.

Once Hoka was done with his coffee, he turned to Hope. “Hope, why don’t you let my driver take you home? Jiro and I will take a walk. I want to show the pier to Yuko.”

Hope pressed a kiss to Yuko’s chubby cheek before handing him back to Hoka. “There’s no need. I can take the bus.”

Hoka’s smile persisted. “No, please humor me. The driver is paid whether we use him or not.”

She nodded and waited until Hoka secured Yuko on his chest once again. She seemed calm, but I knew her tells—the slight worry of her bottom lip and the rhythmic tapping of her foot.

I walked up to her side and lightly brushed my fingers on the back of her arm. “Everything will be fine,” I assured her.

She nodded silently, and we walked out. The driver waiting by the car took a couple of steps toward us.

“Please, could you drive Miss Myers wherever she needs to go and come back to meet us at the end of the pier?”

The driver nodded and opened the back door, inviting Hope in.

As she walked toward the car, I couldn’t help myself. Against all rational thought and my own best advice, I stepped forward, my heart pounding. Just as she was about to get into the car, I gently placed my hand on her arm, turning her to face me.

Her eyes widened in surprise, and before she could say anything, I leaned in and kissed her. It was soft and brief, yet it held all the intensity of my feelings for her. When I pulled away, her lips were slightly parted, and her cheeks were flushed. I saw all her emotions shining in her beautiful eyes—surprise, longing, and maybe a touch of apprehension.

“Be safe,” I whispered.

She nodded, her voice caught in her throat. “You too, please.”

I released her arm, allowing her to get into the car, and as it pulled away, I turned to find Hoka standing beside me, his expression thoughtful.

“I like her,” Hoka said, his gaze fixed on the disappearing car. “She’s strong, good. She reminds me a lot of Violet.”

I nodded, my own gaze lingering on the spot where the car had vanished. “Yeah, she’s something else.”

Hoka turned to me with a knowing smile. “You’re in deeper than you want to admit, aren’t you?”

I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “You have no idea. But between her and me, it’s just not feasible.”

Hoka’s shrug was casual, his attention shifting to his son Yuko, who was nestled comfortably against his chest. “He’s living proof that it’s possible.”

I shook my head; I was not in the right headspace to have this conversation now. “Let’s walk.”

So we continued, the sound of our footsteps mingling with the faint whispers of the sea. Despite this serene atmosphere, I could not stop thinking of a subject that was haunting me far more than I initially anticipated—Hoka’s recent trip to Japan. It was crucial to clear the air before Valdez’s meeting; I couldn’t afford distractions.

“Sometimes the past is just too heavy to build a future,” I began, the words reflective of my inner turmoil.

Hoka’s expression turned contemplative for a moment before he shook his head, his gaze fixed on the horizon. “Two years ago, I might have agreed with you. But not now. If intentions are pure and both parties are committed, a lot can be overcome. Look at what Violet and I managed to conquer.”

The question I had been suppressing pushed its way out. “And what about us? Have we truly moved past our issues?”

Hoka’s pace slowed as he frowned at me. “Of course. You know we have.”

Have we? I thought a little bitterly. Taking a deep breath, I decided it was time to address the unease. “I thought you trusted me, even after I stepped down from being your wakagashira .”

Hoka stopped in his tracks, pivoting to face me squarely. “Spit it out, Jiro, because you’re not making much sense.”

“Were you ever going to tell me about your trip to Japan with Alessandro?”

Hoka nodded, resuming our walk toward the pier’s end, his pace unhurried. “Ah.”

“Ah? That’s all you’ll say.”

He chuckled softly. “I do have more to say. Oda is a little bitch for gossiping like a teenager, but I was going to tell you. I was!” he insisted when I threw him a suspicious look. “I wanted to avoid getting either of our hopes up.”

“Hopes for what?” My frown deepened as genuine confusion clouded my expression .

Hoka halted just as we reached the pier’s end, his gaze focused on the tranquil expanse of Elliott Bay. The waters seemed calm, like our conversation, as if it were a prelude to the storm that may come. Yuko’s infectious giggles punctuated the air as he playfully reached out toward the swooping seagulls.

“I miss you, Jiro. Deeply. Life, the business…” Hoka’s voice trailed off, a sigh underscoring his words. “You’ve been gone for nearly two years, and nothing feels quite the same without you.”

My gaze shifted downward, focusing on the gray, weathered stones beneath my feet. Guilt and ghosts of my past mistakes pressed upon me, their presence a heavy weight. I had sacrificed myself to safeguard our clan from a brewing war, one that threatened to shatter Hoka’s newfound family. Yet, in the recesses of my mind, I couldn’t escape the realization that they wouldn’t have been in this predicament in the first place if I hadn’t intervened in Hoka’s relationship with Violet.

“The dealings with the Italians are flourishing, to say the least. Our business in multiple regions has grown by almost forty percent,” Hoka continued, his gaze holding mine. “The elders are overjoyed.”

“Okay?” My confusion lingered, his words a puzzle I was struggling to decipher.

A sidelong smile played on his lips, acknowledging the evident perplexity in my voice. “It means the elders are feeling rather benevolent. In fact, Sandro and I shared with them the truth about what happened in the warehouse the day my uncle died. ”

“You didn’t!” I exclaimed, a huff escaping me. Such a revelation could have easily turned disastrous. Alessandro, Violet’s mobster brother, had executed Hoka’s uncle to shield Violet. It was a reckless act, given Violet wasn’t yet bound to Hoka. Such audacity, taking down a yakuza elite like that, could have started an all-out war. But I had stepped in, shouldering the blame. It was the least I could do after all the chaos I’d inadvertently caused between Hoka and Violet. They deserved peace, even if it meant I lost my position, my identity, in the process.

Hoka’s smirk deepened. “Oh, I did,” he affirmed, his eyes locked with mine. “Now, the question is—will you reclaim your position as my wakagashira ? Return to the world we once ruled side by side?” The invitation, laden with past memories and a potential future, hung thick in the air between us.

For a few heartbeats, I stood frozen. I had been convinced that this future was an impossibility. I had been exiled, and despite the past two years teaching me to savor the taste of freedom, the recent weeks had reshaped me. Despite my ongoing self-inflicted torment over not fitting into Hope’s life, I couldn’t deny the allure of the prospect. A life entwined with hers danced before my mind, a vision I found both exhilarating and terrifying.

“Okay… that’s not quite the reaction I anticipated,” Hoka interjected, a perplexed furrow creasing his brows. His demeanor seemed slightly irked. “I thought you’d be eager to return.”

“No, wait, yes, I am.” My response was a tangled admission, a candid reflection of my own inner turmoil. “It’s just that… this is so unexpected, and given everything—”

Hoka raised his eyebrows knowingly. “Ah,” he nodded in understanding. “Everything. Well, remember, nothing prevents you from taking ‘everything’ along with you. The summer house is yours, spacious enough for a family if that’s what you’re considering.”

A family with Hope… My gaze shifted involuntarily toward Yuko. The image unfolded vividly in my mind—a life where Hope and I were together, the two of us creating a baby of our own. Yet, amid that enticing vision, a fierce internal struggle raged. I had fought so ardently to free Hope from the burdens she had long carried, to liberate her from the weight of her past. Was it not hypocrisy to then potentially shackle her to a different kind of confinement, to deny her the chance to savor genuine freedom?

What kind of man would that make me?

The monster you’re always claiming to be, the insidious voice taunted from within.

I looked down at Yuko, his restlessness growing evident.

“The little guy’s probably hungry; the milk is in the bag in the car,” Hoka chimed in casually, his tone lightening the mood.

“Too cool to carry it yourself?” I retorted with a laugh.

He snorted, a playful smile tugging at his lips. “Please, I’m cool enough to pull that off.” His expression grew more serious. “Listen, just think about it, okay? We can revisit this discussion once the Valdez situation is behind us. Alright?”

I nodded in acknowledgment, and we turned back, heading toward the car parked in its familiar spot. “I’ll swing by your hotel tomorrow. Maybe you should bring some food for Oda tonight. I’m sure he’s still pissed off,” Hoka offered as he got into the car.

“Tell you what, I’ll get him a case of beer and a burger, and we’ll call it even,” I quipped, closing his car door before watching him drive away. Turning, I retraced my steps up the street to where my bike was parked.

My mind was a whirlwind. Yes, I was reclaiming my life, but it wasn’t the same life. I had evolved, transformed by the woman who had altered my very existence.

The quiet whisper surfaced again, a gentle yet persistent suggestion. Maybe she’d want to come with you. Perhaps she didn’t yearn for that form of freedom.

I sighed, shaking my head as I swung a leg over the bike’s saddle. No, I couldn’t presume her desires. I couldn’t coerce her into a life she hadn’t sampled, a choice she hadn’t even been given the opportunity to consider.

It would be a twisted pact, a manipulation of sorts, and I couldn’t permit myself to be that selfish.

Hope Myers mattered too much to me. I couldn’t deny it any longer. And for her sake, I had two options—stay and transform into the man she deserved, or leave and ensure that I’d never return.