Chapter 3
CHAPTER 3
Misha
Her heart slammed in her chest all the way back to her room. Running off after handing him a note felt very teenage of her, and she could almost slap herself in the head for it. But Misha had known long before she confronted Felix that their eventual reunion might be awkward. It had somehow gone worse than she expected.
He’d looked confused and sadly not necessarily pleased to see her here. She wanted to ask him questions, see if he cared that she even made the effort to seek him out, but she couldn’t do it. Tearing a piece of her heart out from her diary had felt like a better option at the moment.
Misha knew now it was a mistake. What man wanted to read the ramblings of a college girl suffering through her first great love? Her time with Felix burned brightly, but maybe it was destined to simmer out. She should’ve followed Zeke’s advice and steered clear of all of this.
Unfortunately, silence wasn’t granted when she reached her room. Her phone sat on the bedside table where she left it, and she noticed the missed calls log at the same time that the phone buzzed again.
Penny. Her BFF was calling her at the worst possible time. Did she have some sort of psychic powers now?
She flopped down on the bed, swiping the call before Penny tried again. “Hello?”
“Wow,” Penny said, her voice void of any emotion on the other end of the call. “This is how you greet me after ghosting me for the last week? I know you and Zeke came up with this crazy idea, but could you at least let me in on said crazy?”
“I didn’t ghost you,” Misha corrected. “There was Christmas and the holidays. I had family things to do before I packed up.”
“Mhmm,” Penny replied, and Misha could almost imagine her friend as she rolled her eyes. “I heard from Colin that your parents snuggled up with our parents and all took an old-person vacation somewhere sunny for the entire month of December.”
Misha winced. That was true, but she couldn’t tell Penny that. Damn her bestie’s brother for unknowingly selling her out. “Colin doesn’t know what he was talking about. We never talk.”
“No, but his wife is super good at eavesdropping,” Penny argued. “Now, Misha sweetie, I’m going to tell you what I think, and you can give me a ding-ding if I get close, okay?”
Now, that was not a good sign. The only time Penny spoke to her like that was when she had a whole list of things to point out before bragging that she was right.
Apparently Misha’s silence was enough of an answer, and Penny started to talk anyway. “Let’s see, when we were in New York around Thanksgiving, you know Zeke popped over just before you did, right? Laurent kind of likes him now and said he’s going to use his services sometimes. Well, his girlfriend came with, and I’m just a little obsessed with her work. Did you know she’s a famous romance author? We swapped notes. And Zeke mentioned this funny thing about Montana… and it sounds exactly like the scheme you cooked up over the holiday and ran with.”
Misha’s breath caught in her throat. Oh no, no, no. They could not go around and gossip about her like this. She knew among the friend circle rumors would spread, and she wasn’t sure what that might do to the dynamic between her and Felix. If there even was one when they spoke again.
“Not that your silence is telling or anything, but after Zeke mentioned Montana and Colin inadvertently mentioned you not spending the holiday with your parents, I realized you really did go through with the plan. And then Felix wanted his time off around the same time. Now, I didn’t dig for the details but it did sound like Felix was headed out to someplace rural and mountainous too. Tell me you didn’t cyberstalk him to the Ranch.”
“It’s not what you think,” Misha blurted out, her panic outweighing reason. Penny, and anyone else for that matter, didn’t need to do so much digging. It might end up looking bad.
Penny sighed. “If you’re at the Ranch specifically because he is, at least tell me you’re fucking each other’s brains out. Come on, Misha! After the long-distance thing, you have to be letting that man dick you down.”
Misha’s eyes closed at the thought, and she fell back onto the bed. If only Felix had dicked her down, she might not feel like such a fool since speaking with him. “Well…”
When her voice trailed, Penny groaned. “Misha, no . Don’t say you two aren’t getting it on. The idiots Laurent has as replacements have no real idea how to get any job done. I mean we never would’ve pulled off the trip to Paris last year if Felix had been gone.”
“Laurent has money,” she groaned back. “Tell him to hire better guards.”
“Well, that’s kind of the point,” Penny continued. “They are supposed to be temporary people, not forever. Felix’s team is partially here and partially scattered while they wait on the boss man to come back. Oh, have you been there for a week too and that’s what you aren’t telling me? Felix dipped out as soon as he could after the last job.”
Misha absorbed all of that information, trying and failing to file it all away for later. When she’d asked Zeke, he hadn’t offered her a timeline of Felix’s whereabouts, just that he would be at Rawhide Ranch.
“I just got in yesterday,” Misha said, but her voice sounded far away in her head. “I didn’t know he was here that long.”
Penny huffed. “Are you two not even talking?”
“We spoke briefly.”
“Where?” Penny prompted. There would be no escaping the questions. Her bestie meant well, but she could obsess over the littlest things. Penny would not drop this until she got her answers.
So Misha spilled the details of her last two days. Her fondest memories were still tucked away in the flower shop with Mildred. At least the shop owner couldn’t make her feel like someone tore out her heart then shoved it back in before repeating the process.
Penny offered a low whistle when she had finished the tale. “So you stalked him to this resort and expected that he would still fall in love with you as soon as you saw each other?”
“You make me sound creepy putting it like that.”
“I’m just asking the questions,” she replied knowingly. “And a diary page? Girl, that's a borderline Hallmark love story.”
“Please don’t remind me.” It was embarrassing enough. Definitely a move she would forever blame on nerves. “I plan to go home now. I won’t face him again after that.”
“You’re being dramatic. Give the place a chance. Go back to the library. Go freeze your ass off outside but look hot as hell doing it. Oh, go down to the Dungeon and tell me all about it!”
“I didn’t say anything about there being a Dungeon.”
“Oh, please. It’s a kink-friendly, sexy resort. There’s gotta be a Dungeon.”
Misha didn’t try to fight her grin. Penny was right, but she couldn’t go into details like that. Privacy was integral at the Ranch and the very last thing she wanted to do was sever the trust between her and the owner when she was just getting started. Her friend knowing that she was there with the guy she pined after was embarrassing enough, and she didn’t plan on giving Penny too many other details unless she gained a happy ending once all of this was over. “I will do my best.”
“You better. Get some use out of the experience. Do a scene with Felix or something. Or if he’s going to just suck the fun out of everything, find someone else who might be willing.”
Misha hadn’t spent much time outside of her room yet, so the guys she knew who could be available for something like that were pretty limited. If she thought about the men at the Ranch in that way, it felt like she was window shopping and Misha refused to do that. She wanted to commit to something real with Felix, not play around.
“I’ll try to explore more tonight. The Ranch and the guests. First, I need a shower and some food. Maybe I’ll get lucky and Felix will crawl into a hole while I’m upstairs.”
Penny hummed, but Misha could tell her friend didn’t buy that. “You should face the issue head on. Not give him diary pages. If he’s receptive, give him more of them but talk too. I know being open about your thoughts isn’t a thing you do, but maybe that’s one of his needs.”
Misha grew quiet, considering what Penny had said. Felix was all-consuming the times they were together, so much so she’d never thought about him needing more than he gave. It was a selfish thought, and proved yet again she knew nothing about him. Even if she played a submissive role during sex that didn’t mean that she wanted to zone him out. If he had needs that he didn’t convey, for whatever reason, she hadn’t picked up on that. They hadn’t spent enough time together for her to know the difference.
“Maybe you have a point,” she grumbled, letting Penny’s words play over in her head. The only way she would know if Felix was holding back was to watch firsthand how he interacted with other guests at the resort. Maybe it was time for her to take an active role after all.