Savage Vicious Heir: Part Two: A dark high school bully romance

4. Abigail

ABIGAIL

The next morning, I wake to eight text messages—three from Elliot which I ignore—two missed calls, and a scathing voicemail from Tally informing me that if I don’t call her back, she’s going to report me missing.

She’s bluffing but I don’t risk it.

Abi: I’m okay. x

Tally: Abi, where the hell are you? I stopped by your dorm this morning and you weren’t there. Classes started an hour ago and you’re nowhere to be found. What did that idiot do?

My heart stutters.

Did Elliot tell her what happened?

No, I don’t believe that. He wouldn’t. Unless she found out another way?

Oh God. Do they all know what he did?

How will I ever face them again?

Panic floods me, my fingers trembling as I text her back.

Abi: What are you talking about? Elliot didn’t do anything. Things just got a bit much and I needed some space. I’ll see you soon, okay. x

Tally: Space is fine, Abi, but WHERE are you? Tell me and I’ll come and be with you. Elliot asked me to check on you. He seemed worried. I know something happened. x

I don’t know how to feel about that, so I shove it down and text her back.

Abi: Really, it’s fine. I’m fine. x

Tally: You’re a terrible liar. But you’re also one of my best friends so please just tell me where you are. x

Abi: I’m sorry but I can’t. Just know that I’m safe and I’ll be okay. I need some time. x

Tally: Abs, come on. You’re stronger than this. x

I’m not though.

I can fool myself into thinking I’m fine but I’m not. The urge to hurt myself, to allow myself the one thing I know will give me some measure of relief burns inside me. Calling to me.

Whispering like a siren in the night.

I ignore her, for now. Trying to focus on my pain. My heartache. Trying to acknowledge and sit with it until I can breathe through it.

It’s in this moment that the conclusion I come to is that I am completely and utterly alone in this world.

Sure, Tally is pissed at Elliot now. But that won’t last forever. She’s an Heir’s girlfriend. Her loyalty will always be to them. The same goes for Liv and Raine.

No matter how much they want to stand up for me, they’ll always be a part of the inner circle, and I’ll always be on the outside looking in.

I knew that before, and I know it even more now.

I let my feelings for Elliot cloud my judgement.

I let myself believe that he truly wanted me.

But wanting someone and treating them with respect and dignity and… love are two very different things.

Maybe Elliot Eaton really is incapable of feeling anything beyond surface level emotion.

Because I refuse to believe that if he cared about me at all?—

“Stop, you have got to stop this,” I whisper to myself.

These thoughts—the ones replaying over and over in my head—agonising over every little detail is going to get my nowhere.

What’s done is done.

And no matter how much it hurts, how devastated I am, I can either sink or swim.

I just need some time.

My phone vibrates again.

Tally: Abi, please…

I start to text her back, but my battery dies, and I don’t have a charger.

I don’t have anything I need here really. But the solace is better than going back to All Hallows’, better than facing the aftermath of last night.

A fresh wave of pain hits me, but I swallow it down, forcing myself to inhale a deep, steady breath.

I can do this.

I can.

But I can’t do it without supplies. And with no way to contact?—

A thought hits me.

The landline phone, of course.

Pushing back the covers, I climb gingerly out of bed and head downstairs.

Maureen has done her job, making sure the house is stripped bare of my father’s belongings. Ready for when I decide to put it up for sale.

A decision I haven’t wanted to think about yet.

But the electricity and water are still connected. So hopefully the phone line is too.

With trembling fingers, I breathe a sigh of relief at the sound of a dialling tone. I dial her number, a number I know almost as well as my own, and wait.

“Hello,” her familiar voice comes over the line.

“Maureen, it’s Abigail.”

“Oh, sweetheart, how wonderful to hear from you, how are you?”

“I… I need your help.”

“Abi, what’s wrong? What happened?” Panic clings to her every word.

“Nothing, I… I’m fine.” The words get stuck over the lump in my throat. “But I’m at the house and I have nothing.”

“I don’t understand. Did something happen? Why aren’t you at school, sweetheart?”

“Please, Maureen, I’ll explain everything once you get here. I just need some basics. Milk, tea, some biscuits. Some toiletries.”

“Of course, I can do that. But sweetheart, tell me what’s happening, you’re worrying me.”

“I’m fine, I promise.” The lie tastes like ash on my tongue, but I swallow it down. “I just needed to come home for a little while.”

“Give me half an hour and I’ll be there.”

“Thank you.” I hang up and breathe a deep sigh of relief.

Maureen is the only person I can count on now. But even she has her own life, other responsibilities.

While I’m waiting for her, I wander around the big lofty house, trying to muster even a single good memory. But everything good is tainted by the loss. The pain and heartache and grief.

Once Mum was gone, life became bleak. The weight of my father’s illness looming over us like a dark cloud blotting out the remaining shreds of lights.

It hardened his heart, and it shattered mine. And as the years went on, we drifted apart. Both of us, too scared about what the future held.

I run my fingers over the dusty sideboard, a gnawing ache inside me that this could be my future.

Dark bleak loneliness.

The doorbell echoes through the house, startling me. I hurry and open it, relieved to see Maureen standing there.

“Oh, Abigail.” She drops the bags and pulls me into her arms. “Whatever is the matter?”

“I’m fine,” I whisper, trembling in her hold, losing the fight against the tears burning the backs of my eyes.

“You’re not fine, you’re shaking. Come on, love. Let’s get you inside and I’ll put the kettle on.” She presses a kiss to my hair and steps back to pick up the bags. “I brought you a few extra things in case you need them.”

“You didn’t have to do that.”

“Hush now. I promised your father I would always take care of you. Now why don’t you sit down and tell me what happened?”

She ushers me down the hall and pulls out a chair for me.

“I’m—”

“Abigail, sweetheart, if you tell me you’re fine one more time, I’ll be forced to call Mr Porter and find out what the hell is going on up at that school.”

“I met a boy.”

“A boy, how wonder— Oh, I see.” Her expression drops. “He didn’t hurt you, did he? Force you to do things you’re not?—”

“No, no. Nothing like that.” Heat stains my cheeks. “He turned out to be someone else.”

“Ah.” She makes the tea and joins me at the table, pushing a mug towards me. “Boys are complicated creatures, Abigail. They often say one thing and do another.”

“Yes, they do.”

“But you’re still young, sweetheart. There’s plenty of time for boys. You’re in a vulnerable place right now.” Her expression hardens a little. “It will make it easier for people to take advantage of you.”

Too late for that, I trap the words behind my lips. Refusing to let myself remember.

I gave Elliot control of my body, my pain. I submitted to him.

And I liked it.

I don’t know if that’s because of everything I’ve been through or because deep down, it’s in my nature.

I guess it doesn’t matter now.

I’ll never trust him with my body again, let alone my heart.

I smother the sob caught in my throat, wondering how things could change so quickly.

How I went from thinking Elliot had chosen me, that he wanted me—to standing in that pub being utterly humiliated.

But I guess I know the answer.

It was staring me in the face all along.

Elliot Eaton is out of my league.

And I’m just the lost, lonely girl he thought to take advantage of.

Maureen stayed with me a little while, helping me unpack the groceries. She even made me breakfast. But she had to get to her new job, and I didn’t want to burden her anymore than I already had.

Before leaving though, she insisted I take her spare phone charger.

I almost declined.

I’m not sure I want to be tethered to the outside world yet.

The girls will no doubt keep texting me. Tally might even keep her word and report me missing to Mr Porter.

I hope she trusts me enough not to do that.

I just need some time to process everything and figure out what I’m going to do.

At least the house is still functional so I can have a hot shower and keep myself distracted watching on the old television in Dad’s study.

But no matter what I do to take my mind off it, I can’t forget about last night.

A new kind of pain has taken root inside me.

Was it all a lie?

Was Elliot just toying with me all along?

Even now, my heart doesn’t believe it. The things he said, the things we shared…

But deep down, I know the truth.

I know that no matter what I let him do to me in the dark, it never meant I’d get to walk with him in the light.

Tears streak down my face as I pull the blanket higher, trying to focus on the blurry images on the screen.

My phone bleeps but I ignore it.

I’m not ready to talk to anyone yet.

I’ll have to go back to All Hallows’ eventually, or Tally really will inform Mr Porter, or the worse, the police.

I can’t return until I have a better hold on my emotions though.

I can’t return until I know that I can be around Elliot and not fall apart.