The Trauma Response (Give a Bookish Girl a Biker #2)

21. Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter twenty-one

C ar shopping is easily the most abominable activity imaginable, but with Jackson along, at least I know I’m not getting screwed over by the dealer. With my new income stream, I can afford something new but not high-end. Which is fine. Totally fine. No need to be a spoiled ex-surgeon who can’t live within her means. Still, the insurance agency is holding up payments left and right—both medical and for my car replacement—so beggars can’t be choosers right now.

“This one is solid. Low miles, good safety features, and a nice maintenance package from the dealership. It doesn’t have all the bells and whistles your old car had, but do you really need those?” Jackson asks.

“I barely used them. This one is great if you think it’s worth the price.” I admit, I’m no haggler.

“I think I can get them to come down a couple thousand. Let me work my charm so we can get out of here and go meet Mom and Dad.”

I nod as he jogs off to annoy the salesman once more and try to mentally prepare myself for meeting with our parents. I haven’t been back to their house since I left after the accident. Something about going back again made things feel too real. Admitting to them that I can’t do surgery anymore after all the money they poured into my education, all the support they gave me for so many years…it’s so hard. Deep down, I know they don’t blame me for the accident. I should have paid better attention, though. Taken another way home rather than chance those back roads. But I did what I did, and I’ve paid the price for my mistakes.

I take a deep breath and work to calm my anxious body.

Jackson waves me over with a big, fat grin. I hope it means I’m about to have a new car for way less than the sticker price. “We have a deal,” he says. “Ready for all the paperwork?”

“Sure, let’s get this—hang on,” I say and rummage through my bag for my phone. “Uh, this is my old boss. I wasn’t expecting a call, so can I have a second?”

“Sure, I’ll let them know you’ll take it and they can get things ready.” As he wanders off, I answer.

“Hello, Dr. Frasier.”

“Hi, Tallulah. It’s good to hear your voice. How are you doing?” His sincerity comes through even over the phone.

“You know, about as well as can be expected. What can I do for you?”

“Right to the chase. I always liked that about you, Tulip. I called to float an offer to you. Your experience and skill in the surgical suite were invaluable to this hospital, and I hate to see good talent stymied by fate. I’d love to have you on as a consultant. You’d oversee complicated procedures, confer on surgical plans, you know the workings of that job. What do you think?”

I don’t know what to think. A few weeks ago, I would have leaped at the opportunity to have anything at all to do with surgery, but now maybe not. Would I actually be happy watching other people perform surgery? Consulting on their plans before they get to go do the healing? More than that, I discover I’m truly, completely content and happy with my new job. I know my answer, and rather than feeling like I’m burning a bridge back into my old life, I smile at the knowledge that I’m building a new one into the next part of it.

“Dr. Frasier, I wholeheartedly appreciate the offer, but I’ve found a job I love. I’m so honored that you thought of me for the position, but I’ll have to decline.”

“Ah, well, it was worth a try. I pray all the best for you, and if you ever need anything, please don’t hesitate to reach out. We’re friends; not merely former colleagues.”

“Thank you, Dr. Frasier. I’ll do that. Thanks again.”

“You have a great day, and good luck with the new job, Tulip. Goodbye.”

“Bye,” I say and end my call, light and free with my decision, except I notice I have a flurry of messages from my new boss, which is a little surprising. I open the six messages he’s sent me.

Mr. Price

Just got word that Cai was in an accident. Not sure the details. Do you know anything?

Mr. Price

There was a building collapse across town due to a massive fire. Where are you?

Mr. Price

Cai’s engine was in response. Thor got more details. Cai is at the hospital. Are you there?

Mr. Price

Tulip, I’m not sure how bad this is. It’s all over the news. Call me, and I’ll come pick you up!

Mr. Price

I’m heading to your house. Please call me!

Mr. Price

Tulip, where are you? You’re not at your house!

“You sure are popular today. What is going on?” Jax returned and is peering over my shoulder while waiting for me. My hands tremble, and I can’t seem to figure out what to do next. I hand my brother my phone. “Oh, my gosh.” He taps a response without my permission, then shouts something to the salesman.

Before I know what’s happening, I’m in my brother’s car on the way to the hospital. The scenery passes in a blur as my mind goes wild with possibilities. He was killed. He was seriously injured and could die. Who will help him at the hospital? Months ago, it would have been me.

“It’s going to be okay, Tulip. He’s fine.” Even Jax can’t hide his worry as the edge to his voice sharpens with each word. He honks and swerves through traffic, likely to get us into another accident if he’s not careful. I want to tell him to slow down, take it easy before we end up in a bed beside Cai, but my vocal cords seize and my words freeze in my throat. Instead, I hold on for dear life and pray he’s okay.

The car is barely in park before I throw the door open and dart inside. The emergency room is packed, as usual, and there are a group of firefighters hanging in the corner. They’re filthy and their faces are wrinkled with concern. I scan the area and don’t see Cai’s face.

“Whits?”

My head spins, making me dizzy as my body tries to keep up with my drastic turn. His voice only lowers my panic a degree or two, but when Cai’s face registers in my mind, I take a deep breath and bolt toward him.

Cai catches me mid-leap and pulls me against his chest.

“Hey, it’s okay. Calm down, beautiful.” His soft whisper in my ear only soothes some of my worry. “I’m all right. Just a few bumps and bruises.”

“I was so scared. Christian said the building collapsed and you were caught inside. No one knew how badly you were hurt and I feared the worst.”

“Whits, I’m fine. It was a miscommunication. The building did collapse, but we went out the back first. I promise you, everyone is okay. I’m all right. Look at me.”

I gaze up, still clinging to him as if I can somehow hold him down in this reality if I don’t let go.

“See, I’m fine.”

“I’m sorry. When I got the call about the accident, I panicked. I should have gotten more information before worrying everyone,” Christian says. He runs a hand through his mop of hair and blows out a relieved breath. I didn’t even recognize him or Cai’s other friends filling the waiting room when I entered.

“I’m only happy you’re all right,” Jackson says. I don’t know when he caught up to me either. The whole world is still catching up to me while I cling to Cai for dear life.

“It happens. Everything was a little crazy there for a while, but everything is going to be fine.” Cai brushes hair from my face and kisses my nose so gently, I close my eyes and savor the moment. His breath washes over me, comforting me like nothing else ever has. He smells like smoke and he’s dirty, but I don’t care. I want him closer to me, holding me tight for the rest of my life.

I love him. Oh, my fragile, silly heart, how stupid I was to think I was using him. He’s the same kind-hearted, gracious, giving, loving person he always was, only now I’m old enough to offer him the sort of commitment a teenage girl can’t. I was never using him, never latching on to him to distract myself from my grief and pain. While I might be connecting to him because of those things, there’s a reason God sent him to me after the accident. He’s the man I need for all things, not just for healing. Unfortunately, the timing is all wrong. I can’t confess my love for him in the middle of an emergency waiting room in front of all his friends and colleagues.

“The aurora is supposed to be visible again tonight. Want to go with me and see it again?” he asks, staring down at me. He still has a tight grip around me as if no one else exists in the room.

“Absolutely.”

“Glad you’re okay, man,” Thor says. “We’ll let you two… work things out.” By his tone, even I know there was some sort of flirty innuendo attached, but I don’t care who knows that I’m madly in love with Caius Gray. And if we don’t get out of this hospital soon, I might throw caution to the wind and attack him with kisses.

“Agreed. I almost had a heart attack on the drive over here. Don’t scare us like that again,” Des says.

“I don’t plan on it, but you never know.” Cai shrugs and his grin widens, but his arms are still around me. He’s not going to let me go, and I have no plans to attempt escape.

His friends head out and my brother steps aside to give us some privacy. Cai refocuses on me. “I gotta shower and get some clean clothes, but Chief gave us the rest of the shift off. I’m fine, but I’m not gonna lie, it was close. I could use the relaxation with you, beautiful. Sure you’re up for it?”

“Of course. We’re a team, right?”

Cai arches an eyebrow but nods. “Sure thing. Take me to my place?”

I reluctantly wiggle free and take his hand. Nervous energy washes over me, but it’s the good kind, the kind you get when you’re about to do something that will completely change your life. And I can’t wait. Even if his feelings aren’t as strong as mine, I know he will be gentle with my heart. He always has been.

But as usual, my brother interrupts every happy moment. “Uh, I drove, remember? And we were in the middle of buying a car.”

I groan. “Jax, just take us to Cai’s. I’ll get the car tomorrow, and if it’s gone, I’ll find another one.” I look up at Cai and smile. “Right now, Cai is my priority.”

The double doors slide open, releasing us back into the buzzing of the city. Cai squeezes my hand and smirks, “I’m your priority?”

“Of course, you are, and if we can ditch that one, I’ll tell you all the reasons why.” I thumb over my shoulder and Jackson gasps.

“Need I remind you, he was my best friend first?”

Cai and Jax begin debating which of the Whitmore siblings should have his time right now, but I’m not worried. I know I’m going to win, because there is no denying that sparkle in Cai’s eyes. He might have been Jax’s best friend, but he’s still in love with me.