Wrapped in Winter (Seasons in Montana: Winter)

9. Drake

Chapter 9

Drake

T he days leading up to Friday dragged by. I knew in this small town all I had to do was ask a couple of questions to find out more about her, but for some reason, I got the idea that this town doesn’t know the woman I met in the bathroom. I think that woman is the real one, the one wanting to experience life, wild and carefree, but she’s gone through some stuff that makes her feel she isn’t allowed to anymore.

I hope she’ll show me that woman again. The one I met at the boutique was stoic and laden down with the world. I could see it; she’s carrying more than just being a mom and business owner.

After a few more texts throughout the week, she finally agreed to let me pick her up at her house. She tried to get me to meet her at the store, and I understood why she didn’t want to give out her address. I assured her I could very easily find her house, mentioning Blossom would give her up in a second, and she relented. I pulled into her driveway, admiring the small ranch dwelling with a red star on the front left. It was rustic and the wraparound porch was large. Before I could turn the engine off to meet her at the door, she was already walking down the steps.

I let her do it, knowing she needed to be in control. I’m glad she did though. She made the step into my truck; I didn’t have to lead her, and that alone felt like a win. I want to keep tonight light and fun, sexy, but I want to know this other side of her. There are many layers to this woman and I want to know them all.

She climbs in and quickly latches her belt. I watch her until she turns to me. “Hi.”

Her eyes drop from me for a moment before she gives a small smile and says, “Hi.”

“How was your day?”

“It was good. The store was busy so that was a bonus. I think there’s some kind of ski competition this weekend, so the town was full of shoppers.”

I stay parked as she looks out the window. I can see she’s nervous. After we’ve sat in silence for a few moments, she finally looks over at me. “Is our date sitting in the truck all night?”

I huff a laugh. “I know you like cozy spaces, so if you want to sit here, I’m fine with it.”

She shakes her head. “You promised dinner. And I’m hungry.”

“Mm. Me too.”

“Drake!” She laughs and so do I as I put the truck in reverse to back out of her driveway.

“You looked uptight for a minute, babe. I wanted you to relax before we left.”

“Babe.” She mocks me, but then I hear her breathe deep and let it out. “Yes, well, uptight seems to be my middle name.”

“I don't believe that for a second.” We ride along the neighborhood streets before turning onto Winter Way, the main street here in town. “How’s Italian?”

“That sounds great. Sal’s is fantastic. The meatballs are to die for.”

I chuckle. “Like balls, do ya?” I waggle my brows as she groans.

“Are you twelve?”

“Nope, twenty-six. How about you?”

“You’re kidding.”

“What?”

“You’re twenty-six?”

I pull into a space right in front of the restaurant, put the truck in park, and turn to her. “Tell me how old you are,” I say with a grin.

She folds her arms across her chest, and her little tantrum is actually funny. “It’s not polite to ask a woman their age.”

I snicker. “Are you a cougar , January?” She turns to me with fire in her eyes, and I put up a finger before she can say another word. “First of all, stop crossing your arms and boxing me out.” She looks down at her arms and slowly unfolds them. “Second, I’m teasing you and you know it. And third,” I wait for her to look at me. “You’re hot as fuck, so I don’t care if you’re twice my age. It means nothing to me.”

She rolls her eyes. “Such a charmer.”

“I try.” I give her a wink. “Come on, let’s eat.”

We enter the restaurant and I finally get a good look at her. She’s gorgeous in an oversized green sweater, jeans, and winter boots that shouldn’t be sexy, but they are. It’s a far cry from the barely there clothes that everyone wears in Florida. At least here something is left to the imagination.

And boy, do I imagine.

We find a corner table and accept the menus from the hostess. She hasn’t said more than a couple of words since I picked her up and I know I need to get her talking.

“So tell me the complications of January Nilsson.”

“You want to jump right into it, do you?”

“Well, considering we’ve already met on a physical level, which I more than enjoyed by the way, I think it’s time we go a little deeper.”

Her lips twist, and she gets a sly look with a twinkle in her eye. “I thought we went pretty deep already.”

I have a laugh at her spicy comment and lean back in my chair. “I was trying to avoid that conversation, but since you want to go there.”

“You? Avoid that conversation? Doubtful.” She laughs, “One sarcastic comment and I want to go there?”

I lean forward, getting close to her on the table. “I want to go there with you over and over. At the risk of sounding like a virgin who just had his first piece of ass, I’ve never felt what I felt that night with you. That may scare you, and it’s not what I want to do, especially since I see you already have a wall up for me. But if I don’t tell you, I’ll regret it.”

Her eyes track me and her mouth forms a small ‘o’. A blush creeps up her neck, but a moment later the spell is broken. She rubs the back of her neck and drops her eyes from me.

But I continue to push.

“I believe in always saying what comes to mind. You may not have a chance to say it again. The truth is always the best bet whether it’s harsh or not. Don't you agree?”

“I do.”

“Then tell me you felt it too. You say you don’t do this, but you followed me that night. So I know you know what I’m talking about.”

She begins to fidget and plays with the fork on the table while continuing to not look at me. “I don’t know what to say.”

“Tell me the truth. Say what’s on your mind. Don’t hold back. I’m a big boy. I can take it.”

She looks up at me again from under her eyelashes. “Just another sentence to provoke me?”

“No, it’s the truth. If you think you’re complicated, well, I’ve got quite the story too. I’ve always been open, but in recent years, that began to change. I tried to fit somewhere I didn’t belong, and I wasn’t being true to who I was. But seeing you? Well, it had me feeling like myself again, and it felt right. I let my heart lead that night. It’s been a long time since I‘ve done that. Something tells me you understand that as well.”

“You’re right.” She relents to my question and I see the moment the fight leaves her. Her shoulders drop down, her hands open wide on the table. “The last half of my life is definitely not the way I thought it would go. The first half was amazing, and then one day, everything changed. My path was completely different.” She gets quiet for a moment, staring at something over my shoulder before bringing her focus back to me. “And you try not to let it change you, you try not to let the world get to you. You try to still feel safe at home or with your friends, but it’s empty, and you know you’ll never get back the security you once had. So you think you can make your own security elsewhere and you leave.”

My heart beats rapidly at all she just said, and I’m excited she let it all slip out. “You left Wintervale?”

“I did, when I was eighteen. My best friend and I, along with her boyfriend, took off for New York City. Do you know Courtney and Jack?” She pauses, and I nod yes to her question. “It was fun for a while, until we realized the big city could swallow us whole if we let it.”

“I get that completely. I left my big city needing the opposite.” She looks at me, tilting her head in question. “I lived in Miami, Florida all my life. My parents come from a large, well-off background, and it was expected that I follow through with what they designed for me. They wanted big things for my sister and I, and we never fit that role for them. I did what they wanted me to for a while, but I wasn’t happy, and I knew I never would be until I actually took control of my own life and my own security.”

“So you just hopped in the car and left?”

“That’s exactly what I did. You met the bartender, right? Cole and I are friends from home. I went to him one day and told him if we didn’t leave now, I wouldn’t make it another six months. It turns out he felt the same.”

She watches me intently before asking, “What about your sister? Did she leave with you?”

This is the part I always hate talking about, because when I tell people my sister died, they look at me with such sympathy and sadness. I don’t want them to feel bad for me. I’ve done what I can to get over it, and though she isn’t here physically, she is with me every day.

“My sister died when she was eighteen. I was just fourteen.”

She gives me a look, tilting her head, but it’s not sympathy I see. It’s as if she knows exactly what I’m feeling by saying this.

We’re a part of the same club.

“You've lost someone too, haven’t you?” I ask quietly.

“Why do you ask that?”

“Because grief knows grief. I usually get a different look when I tell people about my sister. The look you gave me, well, it’s one of recognition, not sympathy.”

She's quiet for a moment and I let her get her thoughts together. “I do sympathize with you, but yes, it is recognition. I lost my dad when I was fifteen, and then I lost my daughter's father when I was twenty-six.”

I watch her and my heart beats fast in my chest. She laughs and points at me. “That face! There’s the look I get! Get rid of it right now!”

She chuckles and I give a smile. “It’s not sympathy for you. It’s for Lily.”

“Well Lily wasn’t even born yet, so she doesn’t know what she missed.” She says it quickly and without feeling, and it gives me pause.

I want to tell her my sister’s name was Lily. But I think we’ve done too much already. So I try to bring us back to the present.

“That got pretty heavy for a first date. Maybe we should regroup in the bathroom?”

She shakes her head at me and looks over her menu.

“Thank you for sharing that. It’s been a while since I’ve had to explain anything to anyone, and knowing you already understand made it a bit easier.”

She nods. “I get that.”

The waiter comes by and we place our orders. A minute later, he comes back with a bottle of wine and two glasses.

“Allow me?” I pour her a glass and one for me. Picking mine up, I tap her glass to it. “To finding a cougar!”

“Hey! That’s a toast for you; we need one for us!”

“We’re an us already? Should I book a church?”

She’s still holding her glass, and her smile gets wider and her eyes shine. “You’ve got a line for everything, don’t you?”

I shrug. “Just saying what comes to mind.” I lean in. “Okay, how about to the beauty of new beginnings.”

“I like it.” We clink our glasses, and she sips from her hers. “I’m surprised you showed up tonight. I figured after finding out I have a daughter, there’d be some excuse to not go out.”

“Need I remind you, I knew about Lily before I asked you out. And finding out about her doesn't make you less appealing. In fact, it makes you more.”

“Appealing isn't a word used for me.”

“No?”

“No. I'm the sister with the rotten attitude.”

“Could’ve fooled me. I found no attitude. Maybe I fucked it out of you.” She scoffs and drops her eyes from me. “Why do you act shocked by my language? I heard some colorful words come from you that night too.”

She shakes her head but doesn't say anything.

“I see you for you, January. You can't hide from me. Need knows need.”

She watches me, swirling her glass. I should probably stop pushing, but I feel like she needs this, I feel like we’re already attached, so why not go further? She wants someone to be blunt with her.

“I think you've got a side you don't want people to see. Your reserved act is just that.”

She rolls her eyes. “Yeah, it's why I've got a child out of wedlock. Reserved isn't a word they call me around here.”

“Married or not, you’re hiding and you shouldn't be.”

She studies me, selecting her words carefully. She gave a lot, and now she’s pulling back again. “Being the new guy, you should be concerned with who you spend your time with. This town will eat you alive in its gossip train.”

“Then maybe we should give it something to talk about.”

“Your barroom etiquette already did.” She snickers.

“There were two of us that night.” I lean forward. “And it was fucking great.”

“There wasn’t much time to show off, so it doesn't leave me hopeful for future encounters.”

She's baiting me and I love it. “I left that night dreaming of a future encounter. And now you’re sitting across the table from me, so I’d say my chances are pretty good.”

“How do you figure?”

“I’m going to buy you dinner. That pretty much ensures that you owe me sex.”

She barks a laugh, and it turns heads from the tables next to us. “You’re a funny guy.”

I give her a wink to let her know I’m teasing her again. “I told you I believe in saying what comes to mind. I never want there to be a question between us.”

A weird look passes over her face, and in a matter of seconds, the fun banter shuts down. And so did she, but we still spent the next hour talking about our families and my newfound home of Wintervale. I think from her point of view, it was surface talk. She was just spouting off facts, but I took it for more. She was letting me in by giving me details about the townsfolk—how intrusive Miss Trudy is and how amazing Larry the cab driver is. I learned about her best friend, Courtney, and her husband, Jack. And she told me about the shop and how they almost lost it, twice.

“I hate to give him credit, but Jack has been a life saver for us. He helped Lief out when I couldn’t a few years back. And here he is again. All Lief had to do was call him, and Jack was here.”

I don’t miss her saying she couldn’t help, but that will be a question for another time. “I heard this story, I think. He and Courtney were divorced and then got remarried?”

She sips from her wine and shakes her head. “Of course you heard this story. This town, I swear.”

“So it’s true? That sounds like some real-life Hallmark movie script.”

She nods. “Those two were meant for each other. From the time we were ten years old, they loved one another. It was only a matter of time. And, luckily, Jack pulled his head out of his ass.”

I laugh. “Sometimes it takes us a bit longer to catch on.”

“So you didn't leave behind any girlfriends?”

I sit back in my chair, tapping my glass with my finger and watching her. She’s gorgeous, her skin flushed just a touch from the wine and eyes wide with wonder. “No girlfriends.”

“No wives either?”

I chuckle. “No wives either. Miami is very fake, and I’m just not that guy. I’m not looking for a passing fling.”

“Could have fooled me,” she snarks out.

I lean forward. “I’m sure you wouldn't believe me if I told you, but being with you was the first time in almost a year I was with someone. And prior to that, I had a steady girlfriend all through college. I’m not one to hook up and move along. It’s not my speed.”

She assesses me, and I see the moment her wonder turns to mischief again. She knows how to hide feelings with sarcasm. “I believe you.”

“You do?”

She nods. “Mmhm. Stamina of a virgin.”

I chuckle low at her comment. “Any time you’re ready for me to prove otherwise, I’m down.”

“I bet you are.”

“So is this our first date, or was the bar our first date?” I tilt my head in wonder.

“First dates and one-night stands are two very different things.”

“First dates and first nights are two very different things. You’ll see.”

~~

We left the restaurant and took the long way home. Despite the snow coming down, the roads were clear, and I didn’t want to give up time with her yet. The radio played Luke Combs, and for the first time in quite some time, I felt peace. I didn’t feel like Drake, the guy who lost his sister. Or Drake, the guy who was never going to be good enough for his dad. I felt like Drake, the guy who just went on a date and could see myself falling hard for this girl.

I pull into her driveway and park the truck, leaving it on with the heat blowing but turning the music down for background noise before turning towards her.

“I had a good time tonight, January. Thank you for letting me take you out.”

She smiles. “You’re thanking me for buying me dinner?”

I shrug. “I’m thanking you for your company. It’s been a while since I’ve been out with a beautiful woman who can carry a conversation.”

“Yeah, I guess our first date didn’t really have much talking.”

“Ah, so you are counting that as our first date?”

Even in the dark, I can see her roll her eyes at me. “That was an out-of-body experience for me, so I'm not sure what to call it.”

I puff out my chest. “I’ve been told I have that effect on women.” She smacks my arm, and I grab hold of her hand, pulling her in close across the seat. “I'm teasing you and you know it.” My eyes drop to her lips then back to her eyes. “But it was one of the hottest nights I've ever had. You need to know that.”

Her eyes soften a bit and I take the opportunity to lean in. “Can I kiss you?” I whisper and when she nods her head, I don't think twice. I take her lips and give her a proper first kiss, the one we should have had if we met anywhere but where we did. But I also do it to remind her she’s never felt what I can give and I want her to know it.

“I’m not sorry for how we met. Not in the least,” I speak against her lips before capturing them again, my tongue teasing them before she opens for me. I sweep inside, and she meets me. “I’m not sorry that I was desperate for you that night… so much so I couldn’t even ask your name first.” She bites at my bottom lip and I reach out, gripping her thigh. “I’m also not sorry that we were cramped in a stall, because I think you needed to let loose that night as much as I did. I think we both needed something out of the ordinary to show ourselves that the extraordinary was still out there.”

Her breath catches, and she pulls back, staring at me with wide eyes.

“But I am sorry that my first time inside you was overwhelmed by fear of getting caught instead of taking my time with you. I’m sorry that I didn’t get to taste and touch every single fucking inch of you. Because every night after, until I found you again, I hated myself for not memorizing everything about you. If I only got one night, I was going to brand it into my mind for a lifetime.”

“Drake.” My name leaves her lips on a breathless whisper.

“Know what else I’m not sorry for?”

“What?”

“I’m not sorry if my words scare you. I think you need to know there is still love out there, hot, made for each other love, that can conquer anything we’ve been through. Love that is stronger than anything we’ve lost.”

She pulls back, but my grip on her thigh holds her in place. “There's something here, January. And I want to see it play out. I know you do too, even if you don’t want to allow yourself the opportunity or acknowledge that it’s here. But I’m telling you I’m strong enough for both of us, to make sure we each get that opportunity. Let me be your strength.”

Her eyes shine in the night, the radio still plays in the background, and for the first time since we met, I don’t feel that January Nilsson is going to run. No, she’s going to stay right here, make me fall for her, and then break my heart.

I’m ready for the pain.