2. Break The Patternthe loop will repeat until broken… #2
Strangers always complimented her mystical eyes first. They never talked about her other features.
Life for La’Nova was like living in hell in the flesh.
Her childhood had been good until the age of nine.
Her father, Love Reign, and her mother, Relita Reign, never left her brain.
On good days La’Nova could block out the day that they were murdered right in front of her young eyes.
Bad days she still remembered what their blood felt like against her flesh.
How wide both their eyes were stuck in place the night they were murdered.
She replayed how slow-motion things seemed to move when she got knocked out with the butt of a gun then carried and placed into a trunk.
There was security and trauma mixed in with Kentrell. He gave her the closure she needed. Gave her, her first gun to avenge her parent’s murderer. Although their blood oath wasn’t yet completed, she vowed to fulfill her debt, play her role, so in return she could finally receive her freedom.
Still, Kentrell was the type of man that kept things over her head to keep her in line.
His evil didn’t announce itself. It revealed itself in patterns.
It was the casual cruelty of his choices, the lives he disrupted without blinking.
He made sure La’Nova was involved with all of his plans, good or bad.
He wanted to make sure that she was tainted with him, even after everything was said and done.
“Bitch ass nigga,” she spat out venomously.
With shaky hands and a heavy heart, she took out the makeup that she needed along with the brushes. She eyed the digital clock that sat next to her bed then took a seat quickly. Normally, she would shower first but she wanted to at least apply a light beat of makeup.
Her nerves were so bad she fought the strong urge she had to pull out another cigarette and smoke it.
She chain smoked because the pain inside her never learned how to be quiet.
Trauma left her body in a constant state of alert.
La’Nova’s nerves were always tight, her chest felt heavy, and her thoughts always felt like they were outrunning something invisible.
Cigarettes, for her over the years, had become her pause button when nothing else would stop her chaotic feelings and emotions.
It was like a ritual that comforted her.
From the flick of the lighter to her first inhale, the way the smoke filled her chest and forced her to breathe slow and deep calmed her.
It gave her hands something to do when they constantly shook.
Each drag felt like it was grounding her.
The nicotine smoothed the rough edges of her nerves and the dull sharpness of her panic.
No one had to preach to her about how nasty her habit was.
She knew it because she admitted to herself years ago that she was addicted.
She vowed that when her life made more sense she would stop.
For now, her smoking back-to-back was her only illusion of peace.
Saying fuck it, with shaky hands, she dabbed concealer beneath her eyes. Once she was done doing a light beat to her face, she quickly lit up a Newport long and inhaled deeply. She swallowed the smoke down then exhaled it through her nose, ignoring the burn in her throat.
“I’m still here, that’s all that fuckin matters… I’m here for a reason,” she whispered to the mirror, voice barely louder than the crackle of the tip of her cigarette.
She took a quick shower, greased her body down with her favorite vanilla body butter then quickly put on her cotton bra and matching panties.
La’Nova exhaled slow, then reached for the crisp white-collar shirt draped over the back of her chair.
She preferred to wear her House of Angels uniform on the days she had to work since she didn’t care about having an extensive wardrobe like Lucille suggested.
The shirt wasn’t cheap cotton or stiff polyester.
The fabric was smooth, with high quality stretch that moved when she moved.
The lining of the collar had gold stitching along the edges.
Down the center ran pearl snap buttons instead of plastic, each pearl was stamped with a tiny, winged emblem that only insiders recognized.
She slipped her arms through the sleeves then rolled them once to expose her right wrist to be able to tell time throughout the day from her Apple watch.
The shirt skimmed over her stomach without trying to flatten the swell of her belly.
Next, she stepped into her black slacks, pulled them over her wide hips, and fastened them with a practiced tug.
She then walked over to her perfumes and started to layer it.
First she sprayed a soft vanilla sprit over her pants and shirt.
Then she reached for the Baccarat that Lucille gifted her every three months.
She sprayed it low at her throat, between her breasts, one spray behind each ear, and one at the bend of her elbows.
She didn’t care that the cigarette smoke clung to her skin and hair.
She actually loved the contradiction of it.
Sweet and spicy. La’Nova grabbed her badge clipped it to the edge of her collar.
She slid on her black wedge heels that Lucille couldn’t stand.
The last thing she picked up was a fresh pack of cigarettes.
She placed them in her back pocket then walked out of her camper with her head held high.
She placed all of her personal bullshit to the back of her head. The gravel crunched under her feet as she crossed the lot. One look at her, a person wouldn’t be able to tell that La’Nova just went toe to toe with a ruthless, controlling man.
She slipped in through the back entrance and inhaled the cold vented air.
Soft gold lights spilled down the hallway reflecting off polished marble floors veined with pale gray like angel feathers frozen in stone.
Velvet curtains framed doorways. Crystal sconces lined the walls, casting a flow that softened everything it touched.
All six floor levels smelled like money, perfume, smothered out by heavy secrets.
Music floated low and slow, loud enough to entice a new comer and remind the ladies of House of Angels where they were.
Inside of here, La’Nova felt powerful, worth more than she ever imagined herself to be.
She moved through the first floor like she belonged because she did.
Everything ran smoothly whenever she was inside.
She passed the dressing rooms where girls laughed too loud and peeked in just to show her face. Each station had tall vanity mirrors rimmed with angel shaped bulbs.
“Hey, La’Nova!” One of the ladies shouted.
La’Nova simply waved and winked at all of the ladies then continued her strut to her office.
Her office was tucked in the corner of the main hall.
The glass door was frosted with her name in cursive gold letters with the House of Angels logo above it.
She nodded at the security guard to acknowledge him.
Her eyes scanned over to the lounge area and paused on Roy.
He eyed her with disgust and lust. Her top lip quivered first followed by a knowing smile that said, Fuck you.
Roy was nothing more but an egotistical bastard in her eyes.
The kind of man that would stick his dick in just about anything that floated his way.
She knew Roy couldn’t believe that she declined him on multiple occasions to sleep with him.
It wasn’t because of Kentrell either nor his looks.
Roy was fine as hell, paid, and always carried himself well.
Just by looking at him, you could tell he had a dangerous edge about him. Like most made men, Roy had an entitled aura attached to him. He was beyond arrogant, very cocky, and quiet as kept… He was one of House of Angels’ regulars who gave some of the top earning women inside a hard time.
She wanted to flick him off and taunt his cocky ass but needed to get inside of her office to start her day. They exchanged another look before she turned to open her office door. She inhaled slowly then exhaled fast. Soon as she stepped inside, the dim lights brightened and so did her mood.
“Oh my God, La’Nova!” Serenity squealed, leaning against the doorframe like a damsel in distress.
La’Nova flopped down in her office chair, playfully rolling her eyes. She planted her eyes on Serenity and frowned.
It’s always something with this chick… La’Nova thought.
“I told you about busting in my office, girl.” La’Nova shot Serenity an annoyed look then waved her in.
Her hands started to shake out of habit again. She quickly sat up and removed her now squashed pack of cigarettes from her back pocket. She took her eyes off of Serenity briefly to gaze at her lightly cluttered desk for a lighter. Her office was the only space she was allowed to smoke in.
Lucille hated the smell of smoke but made an exception for La’Nova.
Serenity eyed La’Nova with love and adoration in her eyes.
She instantly wanted to make La’Nova’s life easier whenever she could since the women inside the building made things complicated for her often.
Serenity reached in her bra and pulled out a lighter.
She strutted seductively up to La’Nova’s desk and set it down politely.
La’Nova paused for a beat, she looked at Serenity’s outstretched hand like it came with a disease.
There was no secret between the two women that if La’Nova offered just a piece of herself to Serenity, she’d take a chunk.
While La’Nova appreciated the sight of a beautiful woman, she never saw herself on that type of sexual timing with them.
Serenity was one of the few women in House of Angels who had openly laid with men and women.
She came on to La’Nova a few times and was turned down by her sharply.
“Thank you, now what’s going on?” La’Nova asked.