Chapter 13
Sebastian
My tears flowed freely as I watched Gus sleep peacefully next to me. Why did he have to affect me like this? Why did he make me question everything? And why, damn him, did he make me feel things I had no idea were even possible?
I’d been a coward. Yes, I could admit that to myself.
I should’ve just said what my heart had wanted me to say.
That I would change things, and that I wanted Gus to stay here with me forever.
Raise our son with me, always with me. With us.
But I’d been too afraid to promise him the one thing we both wanted.
So, I lay there, letting my feelings take over while I could do it in private.
Gus didn’t deserve to see my tears. No, my alpha was too pure for that.
He would, without a doubt, rush to comfort me, and that would only break both our hearts.
I was the damn king, but I felt anything but powerful.
Gus’ innocent question earlier had stirred something in me.
‘But if the magic keeps me from harming you, then why can’t we be together?
Why not?’ I hadn’t lied to him when I told him I didn’t know.
It was just the way it was. It was my duty.
My heart ached watching his soft lips as he slowly inhaled and exhaled, lost in his dreams. I hoped they were good ones. I hoped that he dreamed of me, and of a version of a future we would never be able to have—happy and together.
I wiped my eyes and tried to get a little sleep myself.
My heat was slowly easing toward the end, and I selfishly didn’t want to miss any seconds I had left with Gus.
I placed my hand on his chest and felt comforted by the feel of his heartbeat.
Then I closed my eyes and hoped for a good dream filled with a smiling alpha and his little omega.
I eyed the mirror as I stood naked in my bathroom, frowning at my bloated belly. Gus came over and caressed my stomach, his huge hand a comfort as he smiled tenderly down at me. “Do you think you’re pregnant?”
I already knew I was. How I knew was a mystery; I simply did. But if Gus wanted to protect his heart, he would likely leave as soon as the heat was over, and I was a selfish bastard, so instead I replied, “I don’t know. I think you might need to stay at the palace until we know for certain.”
His smile was blinding. “Really?”
I nodded, not missing the edge of hope in his voice.
“How long until you know for certain?” His hand continued gently smoothing over my belly.
I shrugged. “It varies from omega to omega. I think two months will be a good starting point.” I eyed my belly again. “But don’t let the fullness fool you. This is simply all your seed’s doing.”
A possessive expression took over his features as he stared intently at my stomach. He was definitely feeling proud of himself.
I chuckled at my silly alpha and went to bathe, only another wave hit me halfway there. I could’ve sobbed with relief. I’d thought it might’ve been over, but I would cherish this last wave.
“Gus,” I whined, but he was already there, picking me up like I was the most precious thing in the kingdom, and then carrying me back to bed.
As soon as my back hit the sheets, he slammed into me, making me feel whole again.
“Yes, my alpha,” I breathed, smiling with relief. This was pure heaven. My handsome alpha looming over me, his scent surrounding me, his length throbbing inside me.
“So beautiful,” Gus cooed, his thrusts slower this time, hitting deeper, like he, too, wanted us to savor this wave.
It was at that moment that I decided to be truly selfish.
I chose to take something for myself for once.
I grabbed his face with both my hands. Gus’ eyes showed surprise as they found mine, then I pulled him down and met his warm lips with my own.
A whimper escaped me, followed by his growl of approval as I poured every last bit of myself into the kiss.
I opened up to deepen the kiss, following my instincts on what to do, and Gus followed my lead eagerly, his tongue meeting mine in a dance of lovemaking while he continued to claim me with his cock.
He tasted of honey, sunshine, and goodness.
Like fucking life. My eyes were overflowing with tears, but I didn’t care.
I let them fall and allowed them to paint the sheets with my love for this man, because it could only be love I felt for him.
I’d just given Gus my first kiss.
“My omega,” he whispered, his lips soon finding mine again, as if he couldn’t bear to part from me in any way.
“Yours,” I choked on a sob. “Only ever yours.” It was a lie, of course. Just make believe. It could never be, but for a little while longer, we could both pretend.
His eyes were glassy too, his blue eyes so full of emotion as we just gazed at one another, his movements unhurried. I decided to end our torture.
“Fill your omega with your seed, Alpha.” It was a command, and the heat in his eyes said everything.
“My perfect king.” He slammed into me even harder, making me cry out in pleasure. His hips shot forward again and again as Gus moved with the rhythm I craved, hitting my womb without penetrating it, simply teasing it, making my toes curl from the light touch.
“Harder!” I demanded. “I need all of you!”
He roared as he came, his eyes on me as he filled me one last time. I joined him, my dick erupting between us, as my orgasm surged through me.
Gus leaned down and licked my nipples. I moaned, feeling every suck as if it were connected to my womb.
His head resurfaced, and to my surprise and delight, he kissed me, letting me taste the sweetness of my lovers’ milk.
We both moaned and lost ourselves in the kiss, enjoying this last moment between us before I would reject his touch.
It would come; it always did after heats.
I just hoped Gus wouldn’t take it personally.
“Please, my little omega, can I bathe you one last time?” His eyes looked so vulnerable as he searched my face. “Please?”
I sounded way too emotional as I replied, “Anything for you, my alpha.”
We didn’t speak as he washed me in the tub, both of us savoring this moment of peace where the outside world didn’t exist. As much as I wanted to remain in this bubble of happiness with Gus, I was still the king. I simply couldn’t stay here for all eternity, even if I really wanted to.
My skin was sensitive, and I knew come morning that I wouldn’t want anyone to touch me. Sighing deeply, I sat on the bed and faced a nervous-looking Gus.
“I have to warn you,” I began, knowing he likely hadn’t been told what to do once the heat ended.
“I will soon hate being touched. It will feel unbearable. It’s common for all omegas after their heat, and it has nothing to do with you at all.
I’d just hate for you to feel like I’m rejecting you.
That is not what is happening at all, you understand? ”
Gus nodded, but his shoulders were slumped, and he refused to look me in the eye.
“Gus,” I pleaded, and that made him look up, his eyes sad when they met mine. “It will only be temporary. Soon I will long for your touch again. I promise. This is just a natural reaction after an intense heat. Please, just be patient with me. Can you do that?”
“Always,” he agreed, a wistful smile on his lips.
I hated that he hadn’t added the ‘little omega,’ but maybe that had just been heat talk.
I blushed as I recalled the words and promises that had spilled from my own lips in the throes of passion.
Would Gus remember them when all this was over? I knew I would for the rest of my life.
When we were both in bed, exhausted and sated, I snuggled up against him, reveling in his touch while I still could, then closed my eyes and hoped this wouldn’t be the last time I fell asleep in Gus’ arms.
The morning had been the worst one I’d ever had.
Gus and I had barely opened our eyes before my advisors had knocked on my door to inquire if my heat was over.
When I’d confirmed it was, they’d insisted I get back to work.
My touch aversion had fully kicked in, and because of that, I hadn’t kissed Gus goodbye before we parted ways.
“I think it’s safe to assume the breeding went as we hoped, Your Majesty?” Brennan’s grating tone had me grinding my teeth.
“It did,” I informed them. I had my four advisors’ full attention as we held our little ‘you’ve been bred, and now we need to hear about it’ meeting.
Nicolai clapped his hands with glee. “Then we’ll have him sent back to where he came from as soon as our meeting is over, Your Majesty.”
My whole body tensed up at the thought of them sending Gus home, but I kept my feelings locked away as I casually spoke. “Gus will remain here until I am certain that I’m with child. I will not seek another alpha if this heat was not successful.”
“But, Your Majesty,” Jerold objected.
“No,” I cut him off, my voice firm. “I will only have him breed me and no one else. Is that understood?”
They all nodded.
“But why him, Your Majesty? Surely if the breeding has failed, another alpha will be more likely to succeed instead?” Clive tried.
“You said it yourselves, did you not? Gus is the perfect alpha for the job, and he did it well, too, might I add.” Before they could get all flustered when they were the ones asking for details, I stood from my chair. “That will be all. I have many things I need to catch up on from my absence.”
They rose quickly and bowed. Not another word was spoken, and I was glad for it. My body was itchy and tense to the point where I would be ready to fire someone if they dared question my need for Gus’ presence here.
I walked down the hallway and hoped to find Elias in my study. It was as much his space as it was mine, and I lucked out, because on the couch was Elias, napping with a book resting on his huge belly.
Laughing, I closed the door behind me, careful not to startle him, then I sat down and looked over the paperwork that had accumulated over the past week.
After half an hour, I was on the verge of screaming. I felt so itchy and tired, I had to read the same sentence again and again. My head was throbbing. Elias whimpered in his sleep, and through the fogginess in my brain, I swore I could smell something… sweet?
An ear-piercing whine had my head snapping to my right, and I found Elias grimacing, one hand over his stomach like he was in pain.
“Elias!” I hurried over to kneel by his side, unsure if he was in labor.
“He’s coming,” Elias panted. “Fuck, it hurts!”
Okay, I could do this. It was not the perfect scenario while being touch-averse to the point of shivering when Elias’ hand clasped down hard on mine. He needed me, though.
“Hang on,” I comforted him while gritting my teeth before I rushed out the door to alert the guards outside the room.
While one of them hurried down the hallway to fetch the royal doctor, the other, the one who’d bred Elias, stood frozen as he stared back at me, his body shaking as sweat started forming on his forehead.
Was he nervous that he would hurt his son?
Or was it a need to be with Elias and comfort him?
Before I met Gus, I would’ve been in doubt, but now that I knew alphas could be sweet and caring, it was obviously the latter.
The doctor came running, way faster than I thought possible, considering his age, with four guards on his heels.
“Your Majesty!” the doctor panted. “The guards will need to move him to his room immediately.”
I nodded, and the guards rushed to help, while the one who’d fathered the child remained frozen in the hallway, likely unsure if he was wanted here or not.
Two guards carried a whimpering Elias to his room, and I followed, gesturing for Elias’ alpha to follow too.
In Elias’ room, the doctor had all the alphas leave, and they hurried out, leaving just me, the doctor, and one of the nurses to help with the birth. I’d promised Elias I would do my best to be here for him, and I would do just that.
Elias kept glancing toward the closed door, his eyes so sad and pleading.
I knew exactly what—or whom—he needed. I didn’t even stop to think.
Letting go of Elias’ hand, I hurried out into the hallway where I found his alpha pacing nervously.
Dragging him with me inside, I gave the doctor a pointed look when he tried to object.
Closing the door, I led the alpha to Elias’ side.
The way Elias brightened when he saw his alpha was enough confirmation for me.
Elias cared for him. And it was obvious the alpha cared for Elias, too.
Soon, Elias started screaming in pain, and my attention was now back on my best friend and how awful my timing was. Enduring a birth knowing I would soon be in the same place was no fun. But at least it kept my mind off Gus.