19. Naomi
NINETEEN
Naomi
I wasn’t sure how long I could live with Jackson and Walker under the same roof.
It seemed as if they were two pit bulls, aimed at each other and ready to fight at the right signal.
Thankfully, Jackson spent most of his time holed up in his loft, reading and brooding. Walker had taken on the tasks of helping me, which I was grateful for. I wasn’t ready to pick between my brother and Walker, and I hated that I felt like I needed to.
After my Thursday appointment, Christopher wheeled me from the back room and over to the appointment counter where Walker was waiting for me. He was leaning against the counter, speaking with the receptionist in hushed tones. As soon as he saw me wheel up, he stopped talking and offered me a wide smile.
“Hey,” he said, leaning down to brush his lips against my cheek .
“Hey,” I responded as I furrowed my brow and glanced between him and the receptionist. “What’s going on here?”
The woman’s cheeks flushed as she glanced between us, but before she could say anything, her phone rang. She rushed to pick it up, which only heightened my skepticism.
“Everything okay?” I asked, eyeing Walker.
He nodded. “It’s great. I’m just getting a list of qualified physical therapists in North Carolina.”
“Why?”
He shrugged. “I figured that we’d go back soon. After all, I can’t keep sleeping on your brother’s couch. I’m going to need to see my own physical therapist if I don’t find a different solution.”
I paused, the reality of his words sinking in around me. “You want me to go back?” I’d spent so much of my time here wishing that I could return, but I felt strangely hesitant. North Carolina was my home. Magnolia was just a stopping point on the road that was my life. Right?
I swallowed as fear crept up inside of me. My hand instinctively went to my stomach. I still hadn’t told Walker about the baby. I wanted to wait for the perfect moment.
I couldn’t fight the fear tickling the back of my mind that if he found out, he wouldn’t like it. Which was ridiculous. After all, he’d been so attentive to me ever since getting to Magnolia. Did I really think that he would be angry?
It was my fear of my past clouding my future.
The receptionist returned her phone to its cradle. “I’m so sorry for taking that call, but I did print off the list of therapy centers.” She slid a piece of paper across the counter toward us.
Walker took it and folded it a few times before stuffing it into his front pocket. “Perfect, thanks.”
I gave her a nod but wasn’t allowed to do anything further because Walker had his hands on my chair and was pushing me toward the door.
Once in the car, Walker drove off toward Magnolia. We were crossing the bridge when he spoke. “Are we okay?”
His voice was quiet, and his words caught me off guard. I glanced over at him. “What?”
He swallowed. “I just feel like we’ve grown apart.” He glanced over at me. “Are we okay?”
I let his question settle around me as I tried to figure out what I was going to say. I wanted to cry and tell him that he should have never left. I still hadn’t asked him who the woman was on the other side of the phone call before my accident. I knew I should, but I couldn’t bring myself to ask him.
There was fear every time I attempted to. So, I’d decided it was a part of my past that I wasn’t going to resurrect. It didn’t really matter. Walker was here now.
“We’re okay,” I finally said. “It was hard not hearing from you, but I’m glad you’re back.”
Walker came to a stop at a light and glanced over at me. His hand found mine, and I gave it a squeeze. I wanted him to know that I wasn’t going to go anywhere. He squeezed my hand back .
“So, are you ready to go back? Start our life again?”
I hesitated, hating that my first reaction wasn’t a resounding yes. There was something holding me back. I wanted to be sure of Walker like I had been before. I just needed time.
Maybe getting away from my grumpy brother was the key to fixing what had broken in our relationship. After all, how could I remember what I had with Walker if I wasn’t in a place where I could be happy with him? I could feel Jackson’s frustration with him every time he walked into the room. It was getting exhausting to keep the two of them content.
“I’m ready,” I said as I pushed the negative voices from my mind. It was just fear. Good relationships were never based on fear.
Walker paused before glancing over at me. “Really?”
A flicker of excitement sparked in my chest, which I leaned on as I nodded. “Really.”
His smile was wide. The light turned green, so he pressed on the accelerator and took off down the road. If anyone could happy drive, it was Walker. He was smiling at everyone we pulled up next to, and when we got to Jackson’s house, he skipped his way to the trunk to get my chair.
“Can we leave tomorrow?” he asked as he lifted me up.
“Tomorrow?” He wanted to leave that early?
“It’s perfect. What are you waiting for? Let’s get back and find a place of our own.” He knelt in front of me with a wide smile .
I studied his gaze. Wasn’t he scared? How was he so sure of our relationship? Why wasn’t I more confident? It must have been the pregnancy hormones that had me rethinking everything.
Even though I wanted to hesitate, I didn’t. After all, this was what I wanted. I wanted Walker to come and get me. To bring me back home.
Why wasn’t I relieved?
Maybe if I just moved forward, I would eventually feel better.
“Yes. Let’s do it.” The words were out, and I expected to feel relief, but I didn’t. But I wasn’t going to focus on that right now.
Walker whooped. I could feel his glee as he pushed me toward the house. By the time we got inside, his excitement was starting to rub off on me. This was good. We were having a baby. We were moving back to North Carolina. We were going to be the family I’d always dreamed of.
This was the perfect life I wanted.
I was going to be happy once everything was in place.
My nerves were a jumbled mess the entire time while Walker packed up my things. He kept talking about how he couldn’t wait to leave and start our life again. I just forced a smile every time he looked over at me. I was going to rely on his happiness until I felt the same.
All I knew was I needed to tell Jackson, and I wasn’t sure I was strong enough for that.
Most of my clothes were packed when Jackson and Fiona got home. They were carrying white Styrofoam boxes of food when they came in. I was sitting in the hallway just outside of my room, and when they saw me, Jackson’s face instantly fell.
“What’s going on?” he asked as he set the food down on the kitchen counter and moved to join me.
“Jackson,” I said, my voice low. I didn’t want him to be upset, and I couldn’t handle a freak-out. He needed to know that I’d already made up my mind. No matter how he felt, I was moving back with Walker, and that was it.
Jackson didn’t seem bothered by my tone. Instead, he sidestepped me and peered into the room. “What is this? Why are your suitcases on your bed?”
Walker cleared his throat. “We’ve decided—”
Jackson held up his hand, effectively stopping Walker from speaking. “I didn’t ask you. I asked Naomi.”
My stomach sank as I saw the rage in my brother’s gaze. He stared down at me as if he were daring me to speak. “We’re moving back to North Carolina.”
Jackson’s cheeks flushed a deeper red. “No, you’re not.”
I parted my lips to speak but nothing came out.
Fiona put a hand on his shoulder. “Jackson, you can’t keep your sister here. If she wants to go, she can go.” She stepped up next to me, and I was grateful for her support.
Jackson just glared at Walker. “I knew it was a mistake to have you here. Where were you when she was in the hospital? Who took care of her? You’re a lousy excuse for a man.”
“Jackson!” Fiona and I said at the same time.
Jackson furrowed his brow as he turned his glare on us. “ I’m not crazy. There’s something going on with him, and if you walk out my door, I can’t protect you anymore.”
My heart swelled at the love my brother had for me. We’d gone through thick and thin together. I never wanted to disappoint him. But I couldn’t stay here. I had a life in North Carolina and a baby on the way. He couldn’t expect me to walk away from the father of my child.
“I’ll be fine,” I said and forced an encouraging smile. “We’ll be fine. Walker will take care of me. You’ll see.”
Jackson stared at me. I could see the moral pull inside of him. He wanted to believe me, but he couldn’t. I also couldn’t force him to change his mind. It was going to take time for him to come around.
“I’ll be fine,” I said again, this time a whisper.
Fiona reached out and squeezed my shoulder. “She’ll be fine.”
Jackson glanced between the two of us and then turned and walked down the hallway, disappearing up the stairs to the loft. I let out my breath and glanced up to see Fiona smiling down at me.
She dropped down and wrapped her arms around my shoulders. “Just in case you need anyone, the entire book club is here for you. We’ll do anything to help you out—we’re just a call away.”
She gave me a quick squeeze and then stood before I could respond.
I doubted that I would need their help, but I was grateful for her offer. I knew my brother would be there for me if things went south, but just in case I needed an impartial person to get me, I’d rather it be Maggie or Shari than my big brother who would probably track down Walker and make him disappear if he hurt me.
I had an out if I needed it, and I was grateful for it.
Though I doubted I would need it.
Walker seemed to have had enough of the scene in front of him. He grabbed the suitcases and started to drag them from the house. I was amazed at the speed with which he packed his car. I made a mental note to call the moving company who was storing my items to drive them back down to North Carolina.
Once Walker’s car was full, he turned to me and Fiona. “We should head out, so we can utilize the remaining light.”
I felt a bit whiplashed. We were leaving already? I didn’t have time to say goodbye to my new friends or even process what was happening to my relationship with Jackson.
Fiona seemed just as startled as she glanced down at me. “Are you okay with leaving right now?”
In all honesty, I was just tired. It had been an emotional month and a half. I just wanted to get to a place where I felt at home. I’d always thought that included Walker, and I wasn’t going to try to fight that now.
Once I got to North Carolina, I’d figure out my new normal.
“I’ll be fine. It’s better that we get moving and settled.” I patted my stomach, and Fiona nodded in understanding .
“Well, travel safe, and I expect a text once you get there.”
We embraced once more. She gave me a tight squeeze and proclaimed the hug was from Jackson even if he was being a grump right now.
Tears brimmed my eyes as she pulled back. “Thank you for being my friend.”
My emotional response must have rubbed off on her because her eyes filled with tears as well. “Of course. We will always be friends. Call me whenever you need me.”
I nodded but didn’t have time to respond. Walker was moving to help me into the car, and I was too tired to fight him.
I buckled my seatbelt as Walker shoved my chair into the remaining space in the back and then climbed into the driver’s seat. He started the car just as Colten pulled in next to us. He looked confused as he climbed out of the car.
Not wanting to hear another big-brother speech, I just waved at him as we pulled away.
Once we were on the road, my body began to relax.
This wasn’t how I saw my life going, but what did it matter?
Truth was that fate had different plans for me than I had for myself. With the pregnancy and the accident, I was starting to learn that the worst thing I could do was fight fate.
For now, I’d let her take the reins.
I was too tired to do anything else.