Chapter Thirty-Five
Thomas
With more time on my hands than I know what to do with, the empty feeling in my chest becomes more like a dark void. But lucky for me, I have a beacon of light keeping me from completely disappearing. And she’s currently tucked under my arm, staring at the sky.
“Okay. I’ve got another one,” Lainey says, patting my stomach to get my attention, like she doesn’t have it just by breathing.
“I’m listening.”
“Would you rather sing a famous song on live television…”
“Or…” I chuckle to myself.
We’ve been playing this game for the last hour, parked in the middle of nowhere, lying on the hood of my rental, listening to the sounds of nature surrounding us.
For the last few weeks, I’ve been traveling back to Heartwood as often as I can, which is a lot more than usual, since it’s the offseason and I have the time. Yet, I haven’t seen Summer once. Not for lack of trying.
I haven’t asked Lainey if they caught up because I’d rather not know, and thankfully she hasn’t mentioned it, doing exactly as I asked.
“Or…” Lainey continues, her eyes cast toward the tree tops. “Never listen to music again?”
“What?” I turn to face her. “That’s tough. On one hand, I love music, but on the other… You’re the only one that’s really heard me sing, and apparently, I never get the words right, so…”
“It would be very embarrassing for you. I agree.” She smirks but still doesn’t meet my gaze.
“I never said that.”
“You didn’t have to. I’m picturing it.”
As I stare her down, I try to keep a straight face, but her mocking laughter is infectious and it’s a struggle. “Ugh, fine,” I say through clenched teeth, holding back my smile. “I’d sing.”
“What?” Lainey’s jaw drops as she finally turns my way. “Are you sure?”
“Why wouldn’t I be sure?”
“It’s just… Never mind.”
Lifting up, I hover above her with my hand on her side, armed ready to tickle. “Why wouldn’t I be sure?”
Lainey’s narrow gaze meets mine as she tilts her head to the side. “Don’t even think about it.”
“Or what?”
“I’ll squeal.”
“I’m willing to take that risk.” I lean forward until I’m barely an inch from her ear. “No one can hear you out here,” I whisper.
Lainey sucks in a breath just as I begin my tickling attack, making her burst out laughing. She thrashes around beneath me, but never once squeals or tells me to stop.
“You hustler. You like tickles, don’t you?”
“Maybe a little.” She laughs again before biting her lip, drawing my attention to her beautiful mouth.
“I could listen to you laugh all day.”
“Oh yeah?” she asks as her giggles slow down.
“Yeah.” I brush some pink strands away from her face, staring into her beautiful dark eyes, trying to see through the laughter to what’s hidden behind it. She says she’s fine, but I know there’s something more going on, something deeper that she’s not telling me. Not telling anyone.
“My turn,” I whisper, coming up with an idea.
“Okay, go.” She smiles, but she must see something in my expression that has her brows furrowing.
“Would you rather…share your deepest, darkest secret. With me. Or perform one of your old dance routines?” It’s an asshole question, but before she completely freaks out I add, “a routine from your childhood,” so she knows I don’t mean she has to perform something from Jaiton.
She visibly relaxes before her lips curl into a cute little frown. “If I had to answer…”
“That was the deal, yes.” I suppress my smile.
“Okay.” She blows out a raspberry. “I’ll choose—”
My phone rings, cutting her off, and it’s then that Lainey releases a squeal. “Saved by the bell.”
“No chance.” I laugh. “If you pass it over, I’ll silence it.”
“What if it’s important?”
“This is important.” I motion between the two of us.
Lainey rolls her eyes before shuffling around to grab my cell. She glances at the screen as she passes it my way and freezes with her hand in the air. “You have to take this.”
“No, I don’t.” I chuckle. She’s trying to distract me. “You are not getting out of it.”
“It’s Summer.”
The phone stops ringing, and a silence fills the air as the world around me stills.
Summer hasn’t called me once. She’s never made the first move.
And now that it’s happening, I’m torn because I don’t have much time left with Lainey.
“I’ll call her back later,” I say after a beat. “We’ve only got a few hours before you start work.”
Lainey’s face softens and she briefly smiles as she reaches for my hand. “Thomas. This is important. You’ve been waiting for this.”
“I know, but—”
“I’ll go for a walk. That way you can call her back in privacy, and I’ll be here when you’re done.”
“We’re in the middle of nowhere, Lainey. You’re not going for a walk on your own.”
“Then, I’ll sit in the truck.”
“How about I text her and let her know I’ll call her back?”
Lainey’s right. I have been waiting for this call for so long, it’s taken over my life. But I don’t think I’m ready for it. Not here. Not now.
And I don’t want to lose this time with Lainey.
I start typing before Lainey answers, but she grabs my hand to still me.
“Please call her. I’ll stay where you can see me.”
Without waiting for a response, she drops from the hood and walks over to a log before sitting down. When she’s comfortable, she gives me a wave and gestures with her hand to her ear for me to use the phone.
I don’t like her being far away, but it doesn’t look like she’s going to let it go, so the sooner I call the better.
My heart races as my finger hovers over the button, and when I finally click call, an anxious feeling tightens my chest.
I’m still as the phone rings, but when Summer’s voice comes through, I sit tall.
“Thomas?”
“Hey Sum.”
“Hi. Dylan mentioned you might be in town. Are you still around?”
“Yeah, I’m here.”
“I know I’ve made you wait.” She pauses and it feels like a lifetime before she continues. “But if you have time, I’d love to talk.” She doesn’t apologize, and I kind of like that. Yes, she’s been tearing me apart with her silence, but that’s nothing compared to what I did to her.
“Name a time and place and I’ll be there.”
“Dinner? At my apartment?”
“Dinner sounds perfect. Does six work?”
“Yes, thank you. That works.”
It’s awkward between us, but I can’t say I expected anything more. It’s tonight’s dinner that really matters.
“I’ll see you soon. And Summer… Thank you.”
“Bye, Thomas.”
Lainey walks over as soon as I hang up, and I huff out a laugh. “How much did you hear?”
“All of it.” She grimaces. “I’m sorry.”
Stepping off the hood, I pull her into my arms and kiss the side of her head, breathing her in. “Don’t ever be sorry. I would have happily called Summer with you here in my arms. I’m not trying to hide anything from you. I just…”
“Don’t like talking about it,” she finishes for me. “Believe me, I get it.”
“I know. You get me.”
“We have to go, right?” She tries to wriggle out of my arms.
“Hell, no. I’m not meeting her until you’re home getting ready for work, and I’m trying not to think about that douchebag being close to you.”
My lips curl into a scowl, making Lainey laugh. “It’s only two more months and then I’m gone.”
Her smile fades while my heart clenches. Two more months. It will never be enough time, but I’m not going to say that.
“And right now, we have two more hours. What should we do?”
Lainey steps back into my arms, wrapping hers around my waist before looking up at me through her lashes. She bites her lip as she looks away, and I hold back a groan, thinking about what I could do with that mouth.
“How about…” With excruciatingly slow movements, she walks her fingers up my chest, her eyes focused on her hands. I gulp, the anticipation killing me until she glances my way once more. “Would you rather play a championship game in your briefs or sleep in your gear the night before the game?”
“Would I what now?”
She bursts out laughing while I shake my head. That is not where I thought she was going with her teasing, but any time with Lainey is a good time. So, after tickling her again, I pull her back onto the hood and there we stay, playing our little game. In our own world. Pretending nothing exists outside the little solace we’ve built.
And for the briefest moment, it feels real.
If only I didn’t have the strongest feeling it was all about to turn to shit.