Chapter 9 #2
The way he spoke about this Amity woman had me seething with jealousy.
In all the moments I shared with Midas, I never had that.
I’d almost convinced myself that it was enough, but then I looked out G’s window and saw Midas fucking someone else against the wall outside, I knew I was an idiot.
I couldn’t keep lying to myself anymore.
I was desperately in love with a man who didn’t even know how to love himself.
With my heart on my sleeve, I’d admitted to G that I wanted more than this life could give me. It was terrifying saying it out loud like that, but also cathartic.
Despite a night of junk food and ogling the cast of 300 with Lil. I wake up surprisingly refreshed. Dice, one of the prospects, brings me to Au and sticks around to help me out, which is just as well, as Midas doesn’t show, and Saturdays are always busy.
He doesn’t come in on Sunday either.
Late Monday afternoon when Midas does show his face, I’m ready for this week to be over.
He stares at me as he walks in, but his eyes are hidden behind his shades, so I can’t read his expression, and right now, I don’t care.
“I worked through my lunch because we were swamped. People know we’re closed for the rest of the week, so it’s been manic. I’m going to head out a little early if that’s okay.”
He opens his mouth to speak, but he must read something in my expression as he just nods. Alright. “Dice, take her home.”
“You got it, Midas,” Dice answers. I don’t wait for him, I just head out, calling a goodbye over my shoulder, needing some air
I like Dice. He’s stuck with me the last few days, despite being on gate and bar duty at the club. I like that he doesn’t probe; he just takes me back to the clubhouse and switches out his bike for the truck so he can drop me and Alex off at the park.
Now, this is what I needed, a quiet afternoon without any bullshit.
I grin as Alex waves from the top of the slide.
The kid is growing like a weed. I can’t believe he’s going to be a big brother soon.
I ignore the ache in my gut that thought brings and shake my head as he climbs to the top of the jungle gym, yelling “Auntie Legs!” waving again.
I wave back, watching him like a hawk. My worst nightmare is him falling and then having to tell Sunshine I broke her kid.
I move closer, just in case. I doubt I could catch him mid-air, but I’d sure try. There isn’t much I wouldn’t do for him.
“Cute kid.”
I startle at the deep voice and turn to see a man in dress pants and a button-up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows.
He’s got those porn-worthy forearms that make me drool.
Looking up, I start blushing when I’m met with vivid blue eyes and a set of freaking dimples.
Holy moly. If I weren’t head over heels for Midas, this guy would definitely be my new obsession.
“Thanks. He’s my friend’s. She needed a break, so I offered to take him for the day,” I blurt out.
“Sounds like you’re a good friend.”
“I am pretty awesome,” I say, making him grin.
He holds out his hand. “Michael. And that wild kid with the pigtails—”
“The little girl rapping Big Sean?”
I hold back a chuckle at his sigh.
“That’s the one. My daughter watched Fist Fight with her aunt last week, and she hasn’t stopped singing it since.”
I cover my mouth to keep from laughing. I know exactly what movie and scene he’s talking about. Midas and I watched it ourselves a few weeks ago.
“My sister’s dead to me now. Do you have any idea what it’s like, getting a call from your child’s daycare, only to be told your kid keeps telling her teacher she ‘don’t give a fuck’?”
I can’t hold it in any longer. I burst out laughing. I laugh so hard that tears run down my cheeks, and my sides start to hurt. When I finally get myself under control, I wipe my eyes and take a deep breath.
“I’m so sorry.”
He waves me off with a wry grin. “There are worse things in life than making a beautiful woman laugh.”
I blush, realizing he’s flirting with me. I’m not sure I know what to do with that.
“You want to go grab some ice cream once they’re done playing? There’s a little place around the corner that my daughter’s obsessed with.”
I bite my lip, not sure what the protocol is here.
Blade never said I couldn’t see someone outside the club.
That was a rule in Chaos Demons, so I’m not sure if it’s the same here and I honestly never thought to ask.
What might be an issue, though, is taking Alex somewhere with a complete stranger.
I try not to think about Midas. It wouldn’t be fair to this guy to lead him on, but I can only pine away for Midas for so long before life passes me by.
“I have to get Alex back soon. I’m sorry.”
“Nah, I get it. You come here often?” He grimaces the second the words leave his mouth. “Tell me I didn’t just say that?”
I bite back a smile. “Say what?” I ask, all innocent.
He grins and reaches into his back pocket, pulling out a black leather wallet. Flipping it open, he takes out a business card and tucks the wallet back in his pocket before handing me the card. “How about a rain check? And if ice cream isn’t your thing, how about coffee or dinner?”
I take the card and swallow, curling my fingers around it before sliding it into my pocket.
I don’t say I’ll call him because I don’t know if I will.
But being asked out makes something flutter in my stomach.
It’s been a long time since I felt butterflies.
Midas doesn’t count because he’s made me feel things neither of us wants to admit.
“Thanks, Michael.”
“You didn’t tell me your name.”
“Oh shoot, I’m sorry.” I hesitate for a second. He’s not part of the club, so I don’t need to give him my club name. For once, I can just be me—a woman wondering what the future might look like if I put myself out there. “It’s Hazel, Hazel Burton.”
We talk for a little longer before I call Alex over and tell him it’s time to go home.
I say goodbye to Michael, who gets roped into pushing his daughter on the swings, and head across the grass to the road.
I pull my phone out, ready to call a cab, when I see the club truck parked on the side of the road.
I walk closer, wondering if Dice came back to pick us up.
I’m surprised when I get closer and see Midas behind the wheel.
“What are you doing here? Did you close early?”
“Get in the truck, Legs,” he snaps, and I freeze.
I won’t make a scene in front of Alex, so I bite my tongue to the point I can taste blood.
Instead, I pick Alex up and open the back door, relieved to find his booster seat is still in there.
Once he’s buckled in, I climb in beside him.
That’ll piss Midas off even more, but I’m not in the mood for his bullshit today.
He snarls something, but I miss it as I slam the door closed, and he drives off before I even have my seatbelt on.
I look out the window and swallow a sigh. Why does he always have to show up and ruin everything?
He doesn’t say a word the whole way back to the club. Not even when we park and I get out and turn around to grab Alex. Midas nudges me out of the way and lifts Alex out of the back seat. Alex is asleep, and Midas holds him over his shoulder as he starts walking toward the clubhouse without me.
I stare at his retreating back, biting back the urge to scream. With a huff, I grab Alex’s bag and sling it over my shoulder, slamming the truck door closed before heading up the hill after him.
The closer I get to the saloon, the more my stomach cramps, and I have to stop and take stock of things. I look around at this place I call home and am hit with a wave of something dark and ugly. And with it comes the dawning realization that this place truly doesn’t feel like home anymore.
“Hey, Legs, you good?” Circus asks as he walks toward me.
“Huh? Oh yeah. I just forgot something. Would you mind running this bag up to Sunshine? She might need it for Alex. I need to…” Run away, hide from Midas, find somewhere to bawl my fucking eyes out. I glance over at the laundromat and swallow. “I need to switch out my wet washing,” I blurt out.
He looks at me oddly before shrugging. “No worries.”
“Thanks.” I hand him the bag, and when he just stands there waiting, I hurry into the laundromat and hide. Thankfully, it’s empty, so I don’t look as big of an idiot as I feel.
I get five minutes of blissful silence where I focus on getting my heart rate back under control, so of course, Midas barges in like a bear with a sore head and ruins it.
Damn you and your big mouth, Circus.
“A stranger? Really? You don’t know anything about him. You’re a club girl, Legs. You don’t fuck civilians.”
“I know what I am, Midas, you never let me forget,” I hiss, folding my arms over my chest.
“Then you know the fucking rules.”
“Nobody told me I couldn’t date a civilian.”
“Date? You want to fucking date him?”
“What’s wrong with that, huh?
He storms toward me, making me back up until I’m pressed against the wall.
He places his forearms on either side of my head and leans down until his nose almost skims mine.
“You don’t need to be fucking dating––
“Good enough to fuck but not date right? I got it. But you know what I think Midas? I think fuck that and fuck you. I’m done.”
“You’re done? What that’s that mean?”
“It means I want more. I need something other than Ravens. I want a life outside those gates.”
He grits his teeth. “No.”
I shove at his chest. “You don’t get to decide that for me.”
“It’s not safe out there. You’d be alone.”
“I’m already alone, dammit!” I yell, shoving him hard enough that I slip through his arms and head toward the door.
“I’m telling you now, you’re not leaving. I won’t let you.”
I yank the door open and don’t bother looking back as I yell at him.
“Fuck you. I’m done with your bullshit.” I freeze when I see G and a stunning woman watching me.