Chapter 47
Aiden
I shift left, and Julian shifts left. I move right, and Julian moves right. Like a perfect shadow, except I’d never known shadows to glower at you.
“I can feel you staring at me.”
I glance back just in time to catch Julian’s eyes. He blinks at me.
“I’m not staring at you,” he corrects smartly. “I’m staring at your back.”
A snort escapes me as I finish chopping mushrooms for the meal I’d be serving both myself and the vegetarian werewolf not staring at me.
I’d made him a big lunch after our talk, but I wasn’t letting up.
Julian would be getting three very large, very filling meals each day.
He’d lost enough weight already, and I wasn’t about to let his health fall behind while we rebuilt us.
“Being this close isn’t enough?” I tease, moving to the sink to rinse the lettuce. Jewels trails each of my steps. “Holding my shirt isn’t enough?”
When I look back this time, his face goes bright red as he stares at the death grip he’s got on the hem of my shirt. I bite back my grin, and he scowls at his own hand like he’s mentally willing it to let go. It doesn’t. If anything, his fingers tighten as he steps closer.
I hadn’t expected us to be this close again, not this quickly.
After our talk today, that had been as painful as it’d been helpful, I figured Julian might need some space. Hell, I figured I would. But we haven’t been able to stay more than a foot apart, as if that’s the cure to fix all this. With Julian so close, it almost feels like it.
“You know what this reminds me of?” I ask as I peel the leaves back. “When we were kids and our parents used to make us hold hands as punishment for fighting.”
Julian huffs a laugh as a burst of amusement sparks down our bond.
“I used to hate that,” he grumbles, but I can hear the smile in it.
“Really?” I challenge, smirking over my shoulder. “’Cause I could’ve sworn there were times when you insisted we keep holding hands, even when they weren’t looking.”
“Because I didn’t want to get into more trouble,” he protests despite the way his grip on my shirt turns damn near lethal. “I remember you being particularly nice on those days. You used to stare, too.”
“I was staring at your janky features,” I argue as I slip an arm back to tug him forward. He stumbles, steadying at my side where I can see the full blush on his face. “How lucky am I that you grew into them, huh?”
A sharp poke under my ribs makes me fall forward with a cry.
I straighten with a mind to jab the fucker I call a mate back, but the cheeky grin on his face wipes the irritation clean.
“If you’re going to stand here, you might as well help,” I tell him, shoving the mixing bowl into his hands. “Make the dressing.”
Smile still in place, Julian does as he’s told and starts throwing together the ingredients I laid out at the start to make our salad for the night.
He’s extremely focused as he scoops out the Greek yoghurt and adds his spices, but each time he risks a peek at me and finds me already watching him, he fumbles a little.
His blush deepens, and it’s exactly why I can’t stop watching him.
That’s why I see the moment something changes. His smile slips away, taking the light in his eyes too, and something dark washes over Julian.
“Hey,” I say quietly. “You okay?”
He blinks as if he’s just woken up, and when he looks at me, he seems lost. His lips part, but there’s no sound. Just confusion flickering across his face.
Something’s wrong. Did I move too fast? Going back to joking and teasing him when we’ve only just started to move forward? Or was our talk today not as fruitful as I thought it was.
“I’m fine,” he replies with a smile, but it’s too tight. “Just got lost in thought for a moment.”
He turns back to the bowl, looking every bit as happy as he’d been before that weird moment. But I feel it—we feel it.
Max whines as he stirs in my mind, claws scraping against my nerves. I try to calm him down before Julian can feel our worry through the bond.
I want to speak to Alex, he growls, pacing anxiously. I need to speak to him now.
And you will, but we need to give them time, Max. I remind him as gently as I can, but his emotions are torpedoing. We only spoke today, and he’s anxious—scared about something. Let him settle a bit.
Max growls his frustration, but he gives in, letting the fight go for the time being.
I want him to speak to Alex too, to find the same kind of peace Julian and I had. But Julian’s still fragile. We have to take things slow. We owe him that much.
“Ironic, isn’t it?” I say and Julian pauses mid-stir to look at me. “You’ve been in the kitchen this whole time, and I’m really the better cook.”
Lips spreading wide, Julian’s entire face lights up with amusement as he readily takes the bait, diving into a rant about how he was such a superior cook to me.
I listen, chiming in here and there just to keep him talking, and keep that light in his eyes alive. There isn’t a doubt in my mind that something’s wrong, but I’m not going to push it. Not yet.
I’ll show him that he’s safe. And when he’s ready to speak, I’ll be there.
We eat together like we used to, talking between bites, and nudging each other under the table, finding excuses to touch. I relish in every sweet laugh I manage to coax out of him.
When he finishes his plate, I slide the leftovers towards him until he eats those too.
Then I push him towards the shower.
“I’ll wash everything up, you go take a hot shower.”
Julian’s brows dip in that telltale way they do when he’s about to argue, but he stops himself. Instead, he nods and shuffles off towards the bathroom. Pliant and agreeable—too agreeable. I watch him go, trying not to let the disappointment slip through the bond.
We’re still finding our back. It’ll take time before he’s fully comfortable again. I just have to be patient.
I make quick work of washing the dishes and cleaning up before I face the bed that’s in desperate need of fresh sheets. Easy enough.
Not.
Biting back a curse, I tug the fitted sheet over the last corner of the mattress. I don’t know who made this shit, but they’re enemies of all species alike and need to pay for their crimes.
The shower stream cuts off, and I hear the tug of the curtain rings against the rod as Julian steps out. I work quicker, yanking the quilt into place and fluffing the pillows so he can sink into a freshly made bed when he’s ready.
Dinner had been great, but Julian had tired soon after eating, and after everything I’d put him through, I need to take care of him and make sure he gets his rest.
“A-Aiden.”
I jerk and turning sharply, wondering how in Goddess’s name he got dressed so fast, but that question dies the second I see my mate. My stunning … beautiful … mate.
Julian stands just outside the bathroom door, skin flushed from the hot water, damp hair draped past his shoulders. He’s wearing my clothes—my shirt and my underwear, and nothing else. Fuck.
We haven’t done anything beyond hug in almost a month, something I hadn’t even realised until now ’cause it hadn’t been on my mind. I was happy just to have him close, to have us mending what we’d broken. Being intimate hadn’t crossed my mind. But now, looking at him …
“Yeah?” I manage, voice straining as my gaze travels down, over his arms, down his long legs, and back up to where his cheeks pinken.
“Can we sleep together tonight?” he asks, twisting his fingers in front of him. “Please?”
Julian’s heart batters his chest like a drum, but it’s nothing compared to mine.
“Okay,” I say, instead of the shout I actually want to let out, but it’s still a little quick and hopeful.
His head snaps up, eyes wide. I smile at him and all that tension drains as he inches his way over. He takes his time, hesitant, but that fear evaporates when I open my arms. Then, Julian’s running and I’m right there to catch him as he dives for me, sending us down to the bed as he does.
Happiness blooms inside of me, spreading throughout my soul and body before seeping into our bond as Julian scales me without shame. I laugh against him as I tug him closer, rubbing my head against his as he snuggles me and settles exactly where he belongs.
“Don’t get me wrong, I am loving this,” I whisper against his ear after a few minutes. “But how am I supposed to turn the lights off with you clinging to me, Jewels.”
Julian shivers against me, humming, though it sounds like a purr. “You’re an alpha, right? Use that self-proclaimed strength and figure it out.”
“Smartass,” I mutter under my breath as I squeeze his waist. He chuckles, but stays where he is, and I’m glad for it. I want him close, always.
With Jewels in my arms, I slide off the bed and make my rounds of turning off the lights and locking up before I bring us back to bed.
I lay him down carefully before I join him, and Julian’s quick to claim me again the moment I do.
He fixes me on my back so that he can latch onto me, with a leg over mine and an arm around my waist.
I follow suit, squeezing him in tight as I nuzzle him, sighing with contentment when I feel him do the same.
“Good night, Jewels,” I whisper against the top of his head.
“Good night, Aiden,” he whispers back sleepily with a surge of euphoria that courses through our bond. It passes over me like a wave, bringing with it a rippling current of serenity that sends me straight to sleep.
My eyes settle on Julian the moment I open them and refuse to move. I stare at him; stare because I can’t do anything else with him this close and perfect and mine.
A smile creeps across my lips as I thread my fingers through his long hair. His closed eyes twitch when he nestles deeper into me, his head tucked into the crook of my neck. Still sleeping, he breathes slow and steady, and each exhale sends a teasing pulse of warmth through me.
I could stay like this forever. Holding him, watching him. And sure, that sounds creepy, but I can’t bring myself to give a fuck.