Chapter 47 #2
I get to enjoy him for a little longer before he stirs, waking with a soft mewl that virtually cracks my chest open. He wiggles around a bit, stretching his limbs out before folding back into me with a contented sigh.
Unaware of the creepy admirer in his midst, his lips curl into a faint smile as his eyes flutter open and take in our position. He tightens his grip on my arm, inhales deeply. His eyes trail over me, slowly making their way up to my face, only to freeze when they catch mine already fixed on him.
His heart stops, the excited beating literally pausing as he stares at me with those gorgeous blue eyes, and then, Goddess have mercy, his cheeks turn pink.
“Morning,” he mumbles before he hides himself back into the crook of my neck.
“Good morning,” I say, biting my lip so I don’t laugh. I trace my fingers lazily up and down his spine instead as I hold him. “How did you sleep?”
“Good,” he replies. “You?”
“Great.” I press a kiss to his head. “Thinking I’ll do some work outside today,” I add. “You can get some more rest, but there’s also the odd book or two laying around here somewhere.”
Julian immediately sits up, the embarrassment long gone as he frowns down at me.
“I can help with what you’re doing, you know,” he insists, before that frown deepens. “Whatever it is that you’re doing.”
I push the stray hair out of his face, forcing a smile “I know you can, but you’re not a hundred per cent yet.”
I drop my hand down to his too-thin arm, trailing it with my knuckles. He looks much better already, but he’s still a long way off from what he used to be.
“I’m fine,” he says, stubborn as ever.
“No.”
Our eyes lock. He searches for an out he won’t find. I’m not letting him lift a finger until he’s back to being as strong as I know he is. His shoulders drop when he realises as much, and his gaze falls with it.
“I just want to spend time with you,” Julian’s hushed whisper fills the silence, making me still before I feel my heart crumple in on itself.
“Okay,” I say finally. “You can watch.”
His grin returns, cheeky as fuck.
“But only watching,” I warn.
He nods happily before he melts back into me. I wrap him up again, humming my pleasure at the familiar thrum of our bond. He slumps against me, heavy and warm.
I tug him closer, sliding him over me until I’m flat on my back with him in my lap. I trace my fingers up and down his spine, and the weight of him fixed over me feels so good, so right.
Julian shifts, trying to get comfortable, and … it’s too good. Heat sparks low in my gut as his weight settles. My body reacts faster than my brain and as Julian tenses, I curse myself to hell and back.
He lifts his head, his eyes finding mine and all that desire coursing through them. He swallows, and bites his bottom lip.
I shift, trying to ease my crotch away from him as I feel my cock hardening, but Julian follows—pressing closer with a soft sigh that send my pulse off-beat. Breath caged, I watch as Julian fixes himself directly in my lap with a determined frown.
There’s no way he doesn’t feel it now—I know he does. But he doesn’t move. Julian stays exactly where he is, breathing harder, and his own erection begins to grow against mine.
My eyes flit upwards, meeting his as he draws closer, until he’s so close that his breath ghosts over my lips. I groan softly when his fingers brush my mark, and the sound might as well be a landmine with how quickly he stiffens.
Sitting up like he’s waking from a trance, he shifts back, forcing another groan from my lips that makes him jolt. “Sorry,” he stutters out in a panic before he scrambles from the bed. “I’m gonna go get ready.”
“No, it’s fine,” I start, sitting up. “I’m the one who’s—”
Too late. The bathroom door shuts, and a second later, both the tap and shower are on, drowning out any sounds for our too-sharp ears.
I collapse back against the bed and stare at the glass ceiling.
That had been … something.
Awkward, weird, and nothing like our usual madness. Julian wanted it, wanted me, then looked almost scared to kiss me—and that alone is enough to drain the last of the heat still slithering in my veins.
For all our progress yesterday, we need time in that department. And that’s fine by me. We’ll take all the time we need. Speaking of …
Crawling from the bed, I dig through the mess of my drawers until I find my phone clinging to its final two per cent. Good enough.
I call the first number in my contacts, and it rings twice before he picks up.
“Aiden?!” Emitt shrieks from the other side. I draw the phone back for mercy. “Aiden?! Is that you?! Say something! Say something right fucking now!”
“Something,” I say. “Something right fucking now.”
A heavy sigh of relief crackles through the line. Followed by what I can only assume is my best friend dramatically collapsing to his knees. For once, it’s a valid reaction.
Guilt pinches me. “I’m sorry,” I mumble into the line.
Silence stretches before he replies. “It’s okay. It’s okay. I know how it gets.”
And he does. Emitt doesn’t know the gritty details, but he’s seen enough to understand there’s not much anyone can do for me when my world caves. I glance at the bathroom door. Well, anyone but Julian.
“How’s the pack?”
I’d known from the second I left I was being selfish as an alpha, irresponsible too, but I’d told myself Julian could keep things running until I was stable enough to head back and deal with us.
That plan backfired spectacularly. For one, I stayed longer than planned, and now we were both gone, leaving our pack more vulnerable than ever.
“Good, we’re all good. Everyone’s managing,” Emitt says, a little too fast. “How are you? Julian disappeared a few days ago, and we can’t find him, so I’m guessing he found you.”
“He did,” I confirm, ignoring the slight hostility I can hear in his voice. “He’s … helping me through this.”
I never thought anyone could, not even my mate, but since he got here, the weight on my chest had finally started to ease. Once we’d talked—really talked—the rest of it just sort of faded away like some bad dream.
“That’s good,” Emitt exhales. “That’s good if he’s helping.”
“He is,” I state firmly.
“Do you know when you’re coming back?” he asks carefully. “We are good here, but I’m sure people would feel a lot better if Beckett and I were able to give them something other than ‘I don’t know’.”
“Soon,” I promise. “A couple more days, maybe.”
I could go back now. I’m stable enough—good enough— to manage whatever’s left rattling inside of me. As good as I could be. But I’m not too sure about Julian.
He’s better. Happy, eating, laughing sometimes. So I know he’ll find his strength again. But there’s this sinking feeling in my gut that says there’s something else.
“I’ll keep you posted,” I promise Emitt as the water stops.
“Alright,” he says quickly. “Stay safe.”
“We will,” I vow before I cut the call.
“Everything okay?” Julian calls as he peeks his head out through the small gap in the door.
“Yeah, I was just checking in with Emitt.” I toss my phone onto the bed. “What about you? Did you enjoy your fake shower.”
Julian disappears back into the steam before I can spot his blush, but the flicker of heat through our bond gives him away. I chuckle and take a look around the room.
We’re running low on supplies, which means we’ll need to head into the nearest town soon—something I usually dread, but this time … maybe it’ll be good to get Jewels out.
With a change of scenery and exposure to the closest thing we have to normalcy out here, maybe he’ll start to feel a bit more like himself.
But that could wait until tonight. Julian said he wanted the day together, so we’d spend it here—just us, without any heavy feelings or difficult talks.
“What do you want for breakfast?” I shout as I look around what’s left.
“As the better cook between us,” he calls back, “I’m sure I’ll love whatever you make.”
A snort escapes me as I shake my head. “Keep talking, chef.”
Yeah, we’ll be okay. He’s still mine. Still here. That’s enough for today.