Chapter 20
CHAPTER TWENTY
S tepping into the smoky, noisy atmosphere of the packed out after-party, I felt a little out of place. It had been a long time since I’d bothered to show up at parties, but I knew it was something I had to get reacquainted with. It had been years since I’d partied hard.
The one thing that hadn’t changed was the number of women pursuing me, especially one in particular.
Angela Barnett had always had designs on me, and although I’d enjoyed more than a few steamy nights in her company, I wasn’t interested this time around.
“Well, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes,” she asked in a full-on predatory tone. I’d put in a lot of time working on my health and I knew I looked better than I had in the previous few years.
“You think?” I asked, pretending I had no idea what women thought.
“Absolutely. Look at you, all lean and hard ,” she gushed with emphasis on the word hard.
“Yeah, I figured I had to work out to get back in shape for the tour.”
“Well, let me tell you, it worked; you look incredible.” Glancing around, I saw a girl I’d spoken to a few times who was a backup singer from Donny’s band, and before Angela could monopolize my company for the night I quickly excused myself.
“Thanks, Angela. You look great too, by the way. If you’ll excuse me, I promised Barna Graham I’d meet her here tonight.” I’d promised no such thing, and I prayed Barna didn’t have a guy in tow.
Stepping past Angela, I felt the weight of her stare as I left her behind and moved over to where Barna stood.
“Hey, Honey, how are you doing?”
“Oh, wow, Cole. I didn’t know you were here. I’m good, you?” She was so casual it was like a breath of fresh air to have a woman make normal conversation with me.
“Doing better,” I nodded. “First time out at a party since…”
“Yeah, I was so sorry to hear. How’s your daughter doing? Lydia?”
“Layla,” I corrected, “she’s amazing… my whole world now.”
There was no hesitation when Barna stepped forward and hugged me. “Good to see you out and about again. If you need someone to talk to, you can always call me.”
“What’s new on your end?”
“Same ol’, supporting Donny’s crew, but I’m getting married next month,” she informed me with a beaming smile, as she wagged a big-assed diamond engagement ring at my face.
“Congratulations.”
As Barna’s fiancé was back in Arkansas, it left her free to hang around with me, and before I knew it, we had joined a group of her friends.
By two in the morning, I was very relaxed from the wine. When one of our band’s slow songs came on, JoAnn, a cute, flirty dark haired friend of Barna’s grabbed me by the hand and yanked me up to dance.
“This is a trip, dancing with the guy who’s singing the song,” she said, chuckling. “I love this tune, by the way. It’s so fucking sexy.” The song was about a guy pleasuring a woman with his tongue and it reminded me again of the mess I’d left behind at home.
“Yeah?” I asked, pushing the thought away and concentrating on the moment. It had been a long while since I’d danced with any woman. Previously it had been one of my favorite simple things to do in life .
“Yeah. You smell amazing. What’s that cologne you’re wearing?”
“Dunno, some shit in a blue bottle I got for Christmas, I didn’t look at the name. I went by the woodsy smell and this one was the subtler of the ones that I got.”
“Testosterone,” she offered, “Smells masculine, makes you smell hot.”
Chuckling, I tightened my grip on her. “How does someone smell hot?”
Placing her head on my chest she muttered, “Alluring then, you smell sexy.” I scoffed at her response and we danced in silence for a minute while I mulled over her reply.
JoAnn was almost as tall as me and as I got caught up in the music, my hands wandered from her mid-back to the more natural position over her ass and I pulled her closer. Her hands immediately mirrored mine.
Fighting the instant tension I felt, I closed my eyes, pulled her flush against me and basked in the warmth of her tight warm body next to mine.
“I can feel you’re enjoying this as much as I am,” she taunted, lifting her head from my shoulder to look into my eyes as she rubbed her groin seductively against mine. There was no mistaking the lust in her eyes.
“Yeah? And you know this how?”
“You’re not exactly small in front,” she replied.
“In front?” I had a semi hard-on from her rubbing against me, but I wasn’t fully erect.
Sliding her hand from my ass to my front between our bodies, she brushed her fingertips along the outline of my cock. Being slightly drunk, I let myself go and gave over to the sensation as my cock grew under her touch.
“Want to get out of here?” she murmured in my ear and our cheeks brushed as she moved away.
I shook my head because I’d already left one clusterfuck at home and I didn’t have the stomach to jump from Harper’s bed straight into another. “Thanks for the offer, but I’m not looking for a hookup, Sweetheart.” I replied as we made our way back to the seating area we’d left for the dance floor. She grabbed a small jacket and threw mine at me. What do you say we get out of here anyway?” she suggested.
Seeing how unfazed she was by my rejection I decided to go with her because she was cool company anyway. I was shrugging my shoulders into my jacket when I eyed the door and caught Fletch watching me.
Instead of making a deal of me leaving with someone like he would have at one time, he tipped his beer in my direction and placed his bottle to his lips. Turning away, he continued talking to the group he was with and I was thankful he didn’t draw attention to me.
“Your place or mine?” she asked in a confident tone.
“You live here?” I enquired.
“Ever since my daddy came here to make his first movie,” she advised me.
“Your daddy?” I asked in disbelief, because I had no idea who she meant.
“Leo Moranelli, she replied, looking a little embarrassed.
“The guy with the bear and the boxer dog? You’re JoAnn Moranelli?”
She sniggered and nodded. “Yep, that’s me, and why is it out of all his movies, everyone remembers that one?” she asked, cringing and clearly embarrassed.
“Whoa, don’t knock it. I loved it. The TV scheduling wasn’t kind when they showed that movie, but it was worth it because man, that dog could sing,” I replied jovially, while I chuckled and she texted into her phone.
We wandered out into the driveway and I expected to grab a cab, so I was surprised when a sleek high-end BMW drew up in front of us.
“I take it as you didn’t answer my question, you’re either in a downtown hotel or you’re sharing a place with your bandmates.”
Before I could answer, a huge beefy guy in a crisp dark suit climbed out of the driver’s seat, came around the hood, and opened the back door for her. “Harold, this is Cole Harkin. Cole, meet my muscle come driver, Harold. Can you take us home,” she instructed and slid elegantly into the back seat. Muscle come driver? Now I know who she was texting .
For a second, he hesitated, looked at me then back to JoAnn, before he replied, “Very good.”
There was a time when no one could pass a billboard without seeing JoAnn’s father’s face plastered on it. Everyone wanted to know him, and he was still one of the most expensive actors in the business.
JoAnn’s father’s wealth was apparent from the moment we drew up to her property. Several armed guards with dogs guarded the high double walled property and CCTV traced our every move as we traveled along the tree-lined driveway, which eventually led to at an imposing Tuscany-style villa with terracotta tiles on the roof.
Harold exited the car and locked us in before he headed up some stairs to the double glass doors of the house. Seconds later he went inside and two guys with guard dogs appeared from either side of the front of the house.
“Is this thing bulletproof?” I asked in jest at what I deemed the security paranoia surrounding her home.
“Yeah, and bomb proof,” she muttered, watching the door without any hint of humor. “He’s just checking the place out before I go inside. Unfortunately, when you have a rich daddy he comes complete with a bull’s-eye T-shirt.” My attitude changed immediately when I vaguely remembered someone had tried to kidnap her once.
I’d always been a bit security conscious, and I knew our ranch-style home was vast, but it was as secure as I could make it from the accessible areas. Layla having a famous father was something I’d considered, and until now I had been happy with Stuart or Paul, my two burly cowboys, supporting Harper to transport Layla around, but since she was now at school and mingling with kids and adults we didn’t know I had already decided security had to be improved.
Harold’s return was signaled by the locks disengaging on the car and he purposefully made his way back to us. JoAnn leaned over and opened it before he reached the handle. “All clear, Jo, is there anything else?” After discussing her next day’s agenda her guy was dismissed, JoAnn smiled warmly and led me inside.
For all my wealth I’d never seen anything like JoAnn’s place. It was huge, long, and open-plan, but with three defined sections. At the far end, facing the pool, were rows of floor-to-ceiling bookshelves packed with novels and journals, ancient and new. A massive square wooden coffee table was situated between two velvet designer couches.
The rest of the space was filled by a state-of-the-art kitchen; a larger, more formal seating area, furnished with expensive bespoke sofas and real wood furniture, and a huge natural gas fireplace.
Strolling over to the kitchen area, I noted how it flowed seamlessly from the main living room. Yanking the tall fridge door, JoAnn grabbed a magnum of French champagne. Swiping two glasses from a low cupboard, she kicked both the cupboard and the fridge doors closed with her heel.
Making short work of the cork, she poured two glasses, held them both between the fingers of one hand and carried the bottle over toward the smaller, more intimate area I’d noted first.
Sitting down, I glanced up in time to see her place the bottle on the center table and turn to face me. Something in her smile as she handed me a glass held my gaze. Taking the drink from her, I leaned back against the couch and was surprised when she straddled my lap and sat down with her face inches from mine.
“Now, where were we?” she asked in a teasingly seductive tone.
“I turned you down, but I’m here, anyway.”
“Is this is where you tell me I’m not your type?”
“No. You’re gorgeous. Shit, I’m sorry, but it’s nothing to do with the way you look or that I wouldn’t… you know?” my voice tailed off as I ran my fingers through my hair. JoAnn deserved an explanation for me ruining her night.
Shrugging, JoAnn stood up, reached over and grabbed her glass. “More champagne?” she asked, waving the bottle before she poured herself another drink.
“If there’s some on offer.” I glanced at my wristwatch and saw it was 4:15 a.m.
“Do you have to be somewhere else?”
“Yeah, but not until this afternoon though,” I admitted.
“Good, then we can get to know more about each other, okay?” she asked, signaling I was clearly forgiven for leading her on.
Relief washed through me and I shrugged. “Sounds good to me.”
During the following two hours, JoAnn gave me invaluable insight about how to parent Layla in the future.
I had no idea why I trusted her, but like with Harper before her, I poured out my heart about missing my wife, but also shared how confused I was about what I’d done with Harper… and most importantly, my admission of doubt about my ability to be everything my daughter, Layla needed.
Listening quietly, she nodded, gave me paralanguage cues such as uh-huh, mm, and kept her eyes trained on me, even during times when I disclosed some of my more uncomfortable thoughts.
I already knew some of JoAnn’s background, such as how her mom had been a beautiful Hollywood starlet, contracted to the same studio as Leo and much younger than him, and that she’d died of a drug overdose when JoAnn was almost five.
After this happened, JoAnn explained she had been brought up by a series of nannies and was homeschooled by governesses as a way of her father managing her upbringing without much involvement from himself. I decided on the spot that if Harper ever left, my music career would be done. There was no way I’d pass my daughter from person-to-person to keep making music.
“People wanted Dad’s money or access to me as a way of getting some of it,” JoAnn disclosed, deadpan. “It took me a long time to realize they didn’t like me for who I was. They liked the thought I had access to my dad’s deep pockets. His fame and fortune made me a target for social climbers, speculators, and would be kidnappers. God knows how many death threat letters my dad received about me.”
“Hell, that must have been a tough upbringing.”
“It was, Leo Moranelli wasn’t only famous as a movie star. It didn’t help he topped the Forbes Rich List for years. His shrewd investments also raised my profile as his daughter because of the trust funds he’d set up in my name. That’s when the kidnap attempts led my dad to buy this place for me.”
From the various documentaries that I’d seen over the years, the iconic Leo Moranelli had a ruthless reputation as a ladies’ man to rival Hugh Hefner’s, and growing up even I’d been aware of the vast number of women her father had been linked to.
“Well, Sweetheart, you appear pretty together to me,” I remarked. “ Why are you telling me all of this?”
“I’m making you aware of how my life has been growing up motherless with a father who is famous. Layla may be small right now, but she won’t always be. From all that you’ve told me about Harper she’s a genuine girl.”
“Oh, she is. I’ve no doubt I’ve seen her true colors. It hasn’t stopped me from being wary about getting involved with her, though. When I think about the attraction between us, I can’t help asking myself if Layla is our only real connection, and we’ve just been thrown together in this emotional situation.”
“Why should that make any difference if you’re both attracted to each other?”
Pressing my lips together in thought, I came up with a possibility. “When I’m at home we live a pretty secluded existence, much like you’ve talked about here,” I replied gesturing with my finger at her room. “I can’t help thinking had Harper and I met in different circumstances, we may not have looked at each other twice.”
“And maybe you’d have fucked one another’s brains out? Who knows? It is what it is, Cole. And for the record, I think Harper may be onto something. This could be the start, not the end. If, like you say, there’s a genuine attraction, why wouldn’t you go for it? I know you said it was because of Layla, but don’t you see, Harper will leave at some point whether you test the water or not. Who knows, she may stay? I can only speak with a degree of expertise from Layla’s position; it’s fucking hard growing up without a mom.”
“I’d never been adverse to take a risk with my music, women, or Grace. Everything was steeped in possibilities. Then one day my world as I knew it was gone. Since the day Grace died, I haven’t allowed myself to think about anything other than the love I had for my wife, my loss and distress at missing her and my daughter’s day-to-day needs.”
The empathy in JoAnn’s eyes for Layla’s situation crushed me because I was staring at a woman who had walked in Layla’s shoes. I loved the very bones of my daughter but hadn’t shown her as much love as a father should have.
I sighed, “I’ve not been the best father to Layla. Going on tour when she was so small, I figured she wouldn’t even notice if me being away became part of her routine. Now I feel…”
“You can stop that pity party, Cole. You’re not my father, and from the conversation we’ve had tonight, you care very deeply for your daughter. In fact, you’re sacrificing your happiness because her stability matters so much.”
“God knows, I’m scared to do anything that will bring a change for her. Maybe because I don’t feel totally confident I can give her all that she needs on my own. Like you already said, a young girl needs a woman, you know?”
“That’s a natural reaction given what happened to Grace and how suddenly life changed for the worst. In times of tragedy, money helps but it isn’t everything. Look around you, Cole. It provides a luxurious but lonely prison. Harper has been there since shortly after Layla’s birth, and you’ve always known you could buy the services she’s needed, but what about her emotional wealth and security? Yours or Harper’s?”
I nodded, taking in her comments and shrugged. “Well, JoAnn, I hate the thought of you being lonely, Sweetheart, and I definitely don’t want anything from you, but I’d be more than happy to call you a friend.”
Smiling, she raised her champagne glass in salute. “I really get you, Cole. To friends.” She clinked her glass and threw back her drink in one hit.
When I glanced at my watch and told her I had to go, we exchanged numbers, and JoAnn reminded me again to think about Harper and what it could mean for Layla and me.
“You’ve been so busy living in fear you’ve let it define you, Cole. Time to reclaim your life and remind yourself of who you are. Whatever’s going to happen is going to happen. You can’t will it not to. So, stop worrying about the things you can’t control and enjoy the things you can. I’ll give you a call in a few days and we’ll talk again.”
Calling a car service, JoAnn pecked me on the lips and I headed back to the band house. Everything she’d told me made sense. For someone with such a disjointed background, she had shared her sound insight and I most certainly had learned from it.