Chapter 37
Mid-season
[Ford]
I let Cadence go because I couldn’t keep her.
For once, I listened, heard what she said, and with a heavy heart, I gave her the space she needed. Think before you act, she’d said. She took my heart with her.
When I told Stone what happened, stating Cadence leaving might have been for the best, he had final thoughts on my relationship.
“Losing Felicity was for the best. Letting Cadence go is just a loss.”
He wasn’t wrong. My losing streak seemed to continue.
And after I canceled my rental and moved in with Stone and Vale, I’d decided to stay in Sterling Falls for the remainder of July. Sylver Sundays carried on but without their typical flare with the absence of one superstar.
One afternoon in early August, as I near the four-month marker for my recovery period, I’m ambushed by my brothers Knox, Clay, and Sebastian. The three of them are practically giddy as they force me into one of Clay’s Sylver Seed & Soil trucks and we head away from Sterling Falls.
“You three aren’t taking me somewhere to plant trees or build a patio, are you?
” I had enough of that shit as a kid, always worrying I’d injure my arms working odd jobs for cash for the family business.
Most times, I got out of manual labor because I had school, practice, or games, but occasionally, I’d be recruited especially when Clay was trying to rebuild the business our father had let fall apart.
“Nope,” Clay counters, popping the -p like he’s cracking bubble gum. “Even better.”
I’m not trusting this outing.
“It’s a field trip,” Sebastian states and suddenly I’m thrown back to when Cadence lived with me and took the girls and me to the actual falls.
I clear my throat, fighting the question that’s been burning my sternum for weeks. How is she?
Sebastian would know but he’s been especially tight-lipped about his sister-in-law. Maybe, it’s guilt because he warned me about her. Maybe, it’s compassion because he saw me with her. Neither instance would be her fault.
I’m the one who fell for her. And I’m the one who let her go.
As we hit the highway for a short stint, and then pull back off, driving along mountain roads, I have a vague sense of where we are. Eventually, we pull onto a gravel drive. Overhead the entrance, a sign reads The Duck Inn.
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” I murmur, as the name alone sets off more memories of Cadence.
I still have the duck she gave me, staring accusatorily at me each morning and night, reminding me I’m an idiot.
Cadence has had communication with my girls. Three stuffed yellow ducks arrived at Stone’s one afternoon.
To watch over each of you. Love, Aunt Cay-Day.
My heart cracked open like a freshly laid egg.
Explaining Cadence’s absence had been only slightly easier than explaining Felicity’s.
At least with Cadence, I could say she was off writing new songs and making a new album, which prompted Zelle to ask if we could attend her next concert.
Still, I hadn’t been able to explain Cadence’s sudden disappearance without saying goodbye to the girls.
How could I tell them I’d pushed her away? Because I’d been the one to let Cadence slip through my fingers. Unlike the night I wedged her fingertips through mine, like fork tines spearing fruit, I let her go back to her life while making mine miserable.
I should apologize for what I said, but how many times can you tell a woman you are sorry for being an idiot before she accepts you really are stupid. The question was rhetorical. I’d already had my three strikes with her. I was back to sitting on the bench, possibly permanently.
Which brought my attention back to the old single room cabins and an empty in-ground pool on The Duck Inn property.
A lake was somewhere beyond the woods behind the cabins.
The Duck Inn had been a hunter’s retreat decades ago but now sat vacant.
To my surprise, Trudy Wallace was present.
Although a local realtor, and one of my mother’s best friends from their childhood, I only saw Trudy in passing during the Fourth of July Parade.
“What are we doing here?” I duck my head to glance out the side window taking in the state of disarray.
“We have an idea,” Knox says, pushing open his door and stepping out of the truck. Sebastian and I follow, and Clay joins us as we stand among the weed-infested gravel that might have once been a parking lot.
“Boys,” Trudy says, her voice loud but kind.
She tried to help our father when our mother first passed away, or so I’m told, but Dad wouldn’t have anything to do with the woman who eventually raised her nieces, nephews, and a handful of foster kids.
A round of hugs occur with Trudy before the four of us line up like we’re standing on a base line waiting for the National Anthem to play.
Clay begins, “You’re not going to be able to play baseball forever.”
“Thanks a lot,” I quickly snap.
“And we’d like to have you closer to home,” Knox adds. He returned to Sterling Falls three years ago after a long career in the Navy.
“Don’t know if you’ve considered coaching,” Clay continues.
I shrug. I had been thinking about it and Ross even suggested maybe I could rejoin the team early, though I wouldn’t officially be off the injury list. I could work with the other outfielders, like a consultant to the coaching staff.
He even hinted that if I ever wanted a permanent coaching job in the future, he’d help me find a team.
But with the girls, I wasn’t certain I could continue the rigorous demands of a professional baseball schedule.
Hardly any nights at home. Most weekends away or home games taking up hours of those days.
A season that ran from February through November if a team was lucky to make it to playoffs.
The missed time wouldn’t be fair to the girls who needed me more than ever.
I’d grown weary of the number of nannies I’d been through and how none of them compared to the attention Cadence had given my girls. I needed to be there for them. I wanted to be present.
“I don’t know yet what I think about coaching, but the professional level isn’t an option.”
The largest college in West Virginia was WVU in Morgantown, three hours from here. That left the local high school.
“I could always ask Tate Haven about a job,” I say recalling he’s the athletic director at the high school.
“Fuck no,” Sebastian counters. “This is better.”
Trudy Wallace has remained suspiciously silent, letting my brothers do all the talking and I’m still wondering why she’s present.
“What’s better?”
Sebastian points at the set of weather-worn cabins and the pool with a ripe stench coming from the muddy water within it. “This.”
I’m still missing something.
“We,” Knox starts again. “Thought maybe you’d consider starting a baseball camp here.” He nods toward the cabins again. “Or even a general sports camp.” He’d told me how Tim had to go all the way to Charles Town where his dad lives for soccer camp last summer.
“The land is cheap,” Clay continues.
I snort. “It should be. These buildings look like shit.” I send an apologetic glance to Trudy, who simply smiles at me, as if silently agreeing.
But slowly, I see the one room structures fixed up and made into mini-bunkhouses, maybe four guys to a cabin.
The pool could either be restored or filled in, but swimming was good conditioning to keep arms loose.
To the left of the immediate gravel lot was an open field.
Was it big enough for a diamond, or two?
Or maybe an indoor facility could be built?
“I—” My tongue ties. I don’t remember what I was about to say. I don’t know what to ask. This came out of left field, every pun intended.
“A baseball camp,” I whisper. Suddenly, my mind is reeling with the idea of scholarships for kids like me who need the place and the means to get ahead.
Who knows what kind of talent might come here?
Or what an experience here might lead kids to do?
Sports weren’t only about being on a national team but being a member of something, learning teamwork, strengthening determination, and building pride even with a loss.
Clay adds. “Lucky for you, you have cheap labor to fix this place up.”
“That was not part of our deal,” Sebastian counters, glaring at Clay.
Trudy chuckles.
“Why do you guys keep emphasizing we and our?”
Knox looks off to the right. Sebastian lowers his head. Clay stares past me.
“Alright, assholes, what’s going on here?” I glare at each of them as they ignore me, giving them each a second to spill before turning on my heels. I don’t need this shit. I have enough on my plate even if these jerks have planted the seed in my head.
Could I run a baseball facility?
“Okay fine,” Sebastian calls out.
“Seb,” Knox warns.
“Fuck it,” Clay adds. “If a woman looked out for me like she’s looking out for him, I’d worship at her feet.”
“What woman?” I spin around, narrowing my eyes at my brothers.
They all know about Cadence and me by now because tequila and my tongue are enemies.
One night, I told them how I first met Cadence, what she did for me.
I added how she came to see me in Arizona, which they knew, and rushed to Chicago when I was hurt, which they also knew.
What I tried to keep to myself was how we’d fallen into bed together and I’d fallen in love with her, but I’m certain that spilled out as well.
I’ve been a grumpy ass since Cadence’s absence.
With more staring off in different directions from Sebastian and Knox, Clay meets my gaze head on.
“You know which woman would be looking out for your future and your girls. She figured a camp would bring you closer to us, and we could help with the girls because we’re family,” Clay emphasizes. “You’d be available to Zelle, Winnie, and June all the time.”
He sighs like he’s read my mind about wanting to be more present for my daughters.
Running a hand over his short gray hair, he adds, “Look, this is only contingent on you not returning to the Anchors, and even if you did return, we can start this project now and have it all set to open next year. Or the year after. Just think about it.”
I didn’t have to think too hard. The place is perfect, and I glance at Trudy, suddenly understanding why she’s present.
“What did she do?” My throat is thick. Did Cadence buy this land already? What was she thinking?
Trudy straightens her shoulders. “Nothing other than find the property and propose an idea. The rest is up to you, Ford. What is your heart telling you to do?”
Run home, Fordie. Rapid clapping and cheerful laughter whispers around me, and I glance at the trees assuming it’s only the leaves rustling in the wind. Then I look back at that empty field.
“Is there something in it for her?” I counter, squinting off into the distance. Would she come back to me, to us, if I did this?
“You’re a dick.” Sebastian lifts his head and glares at me.
“You’re the one who told me to stay away from her.” I point at him. Our relationship might be better but there’s always going to be a thread of tension between us.
“I never said that.” His eyes widen. “I wanted you to be careful because I could see how you were getting with her.”
“Oh? And how was I getting, Sebastian?” I snap, daring him to say something negative.
“You were falling in love with her.” Then he chuckles softly and rubs at the back of his neck. “There’s just something about those Calloway girls.”
“And loving her would be a bad thing?”
Sebastian’s expression hardens. “Loving her is exactly what she needs.”
“I—” Fuck, he’s right. He knows he’s right, but I let her go. She said it was for the best. Frustrated, I ask, “What do you want me to do, Sebastian?”
He glances up at me, long and hard for a second. “You’re a baseball player, man. You swing. You miss. You swing again. She’s your endgame. Your homerun.”
Knox slaps Sebastian on the shoulder and swipes beneath his eye like he’s wiping away a tear. “That was fucking beautiful, man.” He coughs like he’s trying to pull himself together.
“Fuck you, you love sap,” Sebastian grouses. “You’re the one all goofy for Halle, and you know I’m right.”
Trudy chuckles, addressing me. “It might be difficult to remember the good times with your parents, but your mama had a vision once. Wanted to open that Seed & Soil, and your daddy made it happen for her. Love leads us in odd directions. Once you hit the ball, Ford, you know you have no real control over where it lands. In a mitt. On the field. In the stands. But a small adjustment can land that ball outside the stadium.” Trudy arches her arm and whistles to imitate the whizz of a ball.
“Grand slam.” She smacks her hands together once and smiles.
“Just what are you getting at, Trudy?” Bringing up the happier times of our parents feels out of place here, although I appreciate her baseball analogy.
“Pay attention, Ford. Grand gestures are a result of the smallest actions.”
Like a yellow rubber duck for protection.
“Someone’s looking out for you,” she adds in her all-knowing voice.
Did Trudy mean an angel up above? Or a superstar in the present? My thoughts return to my earlier question. What was Cadence thinking? Does she miss me like I miss her? Has she thought of those good times with me, or only the mess I made in the end?
I nod once and avoid Trudy’s soft stare by tugging my ballcap from my head then quickly putting it back in place. “As long as you’re here, want to show me the place?”
Trudy smiles wide, a spark in her dark eyes like she already knows which direction my love is leading me.
Run home, Ford. And that home is a woman always taking care of me.
As I step toward Trudy, Knox speaks up. “She did have one thing she thought you should consider.” He softly chuckles, clapping my good shoulder. “She thought ducks would make a nice mascot for the camp.”
I laugh, the sound genuine for the first time in a month. “Of course she did.”