Chapter 21
21
“B, you okay?”
Beth looked up and saw Kai standing by the table. Because he worked for a few hours on Saturday afternoons and it must be time for his shift to start.
She tried to form words, but there weren’t any. Her brain couldn’t seem to keep processing what she’d just learned and still do the human things required for everyday life.
Rick had lied. Worse, he’d played her and made her a part of his deception. She didn’t understand what sick game he was playing, but the end result would be the loss of a wonderful friendship. She’d hurt Jana. Someone she liked and respected and admired. She’d knowingly let Jana continue to date a cheater. In part to save herself and in part because she’d trusted her brother. She’d taken a significant friendship and tossed it aside as if it meant nothing. And it wasn’t just Jana she’d betrayed. There was also Teddy. Because of what had happened, she was going to lose the man she was falling in love with. No matter how she explained, she’d known her brother was cheating on Jana and she hadn’t said anything. She’d been an accomplice. She understood how Teddy was going to feel, because that was what she would feel if their situations were reversed.
“B?” Kai sat across from her. “You’re scaring me.”
“What? Oh, sorry. No, I’m fine. It’s not anything…” She was about to say it wasn’t anything bad, but of course it was. It was horrible and awful and nothing she had ever been able to imagine.
“Tell me,” he said quietly. “I won’t say anything. I give you my word.”
That nearly made her smile. Funny how she could trust the twenty-two-year-old sitting across from her. Of course she’d thought she could trust Rick. But Kai was different. She couldn’t explain how, but she knew he was.
“It’s Rick.”
“Was he in a car accident?”
She shook her head. “He lied to me.”
“People lie, B. It’s kind of a thing.”
“Not like this. Not over and over.” She stared into Kai’s kind eyes and told him about catching her brother with Galaxy.
“I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t think he was that kind of person.” She tried to remember all he’d said. “He acted sorry and kept saying all the things you’d expect. He told me Jana was the woman he wanted to keep seeing, and he swore he would end things with Galaxy.”
More memories came to her. “He was so angry when he found out I was dating Teddy. He talked about how it wasn’t good for him, that if he broke up with Jana, I’d still be with Teddy, and that wasn’t going to work for him.”
She shook her head. “I don’t remember it all, and it doesn’t matter now, because everything’s over.”
“He’s still dating Galaxy.”
Kai wasn’t asking a question.
“He is. They’ve been going out for nine months. He’s not cheating on Jana, he’s cheating with her. Galaxy’s the real girlfriend. When I found out what he was doing, I kept quiet. I didn’t tell Jana and I didn’t tell Teddy. Rick said it was over and I believed him, so I took the easy way out.”
“It doesn’t sound like it’s been very easy,” he told her. “This isn’t your fault. You’re not the one who messed up.”
“You sure about that?” She felt her lower lip tremble as she fought tears. “I’ve hurt a friend I care about very much. I’ve lied to Teddy—oh, not directly, but I still lied. I thought I knew my brother and I don’t at all. What else is a lie? All those horrible women he told me about. I never met any of them. Were they real? Now I’ve created a situation that is going to damage so many people, and that’s on me.”
The threat of tears continued, and now she fought against nausea. “I thought I knew him. I would swear I understood his character, but I don’t. He’s my brother. We’ve been there for each other all our lives. I’ve always taken care of him. How didn’t I know he was capable of this?” She looked at Kai. “He lied to me again and again and I had no idea.”
Tears spilled over, running down her cheeks. Her breath caught in a sob. Kai shifted close and wrapped his arms around her.
“It’s okay,” he told her.
She appreciated the words but knew they weren’t true. Nothing was okay. Worse, whatever she was feeling now was nothing compared with the emotions she would experience once the shock wore off.
“It’s all gone,” she whispered. “Teddy and Jana. They’re never going to forgive me.” She looked at him. “I wouldn’t if I were them. Plus I was just getting to know Teddy’s kids. Magnolia wants to be my friend. She takes care of the family, and she was willing to trust me, and I betrayed her, too.”
His mouth twisted. “I’m sorry.”
“Thanks.”
She drew back and wiped her face. “You don’t have to sit here, Kai. You can go to work. I’m going to get my things and head home.”
“You all right to drive?”
“Yeah. I’m all right.”
She wasn’t, of course. She might never be again.
* * *
Beth spent the rest of the afternoon trying to get in touch with her brother. She left messages and voicemails and nearly went by his house. She didn’t think he was on call, and she didn’t think he was with Galaxy. Jana was studying for finals, so unlikely to be hanging out with him. But no matter how many times she reached out, he didn’t call her back.
Her mind went to the darkest of places. Was there a third woman he was seeing? Yet another life he was going to destroy? She paced and cried and flung herself on her bed, yet nothing changed. She still had to deal with the fact that her brother had lied so fundamentally about so many things. She had no idea what was real with him and what wasn’t. Was he in love with Galaxy? Did he prefer Jana? And in the end, did it matter at all?
Almost worse, she’d been a part of it. She’d enabled him. She wanted to say it had been unwillingly—that she’d been sucked into his game unknowingly. Except she had known about Galaxy. She’d confronted him and told him to choose. Then she’d kept his secret. She had lied for him because he was her brother.
No, she thought as she sat on the edge of her bed. That wasn’t the real reason. She’d lied for him because she hadn’t wanted to lose the happy life she’d finally found. She’d wanted to keep Jana as her best friend and Teddy as her lover and their kids as her family. She’d wanted them all to get closer. She’d wanted the fantasy, and she’d been willing to sacrifice what was right to get it.
Every few minutes, her brain circled back to how they’d come to this. When had Rick changed? They were supposed to be a team—they’d always been there for each other. She couldn’t reconcile what she knew with who she thought he was. Just a few days ago, he’d talked about how grateful he’d been that she’d steered him in the right direction. He’d said that Jana was the one and that they were happy together. He’d never once hinted that he was still seeing Galaxy.
She glanced at her watch and realized she had to get ready for her “double date” with Jana and Teddy. That or cancel. She honestly didn’t know what to do. Faking her way through the evening seemed impossible. But if she didn’t go, she would need an excuse. It seemed having her period was the only lie she was good at these days, and she couldn’t use that one again.
Plus if she showed up, she could drag Rick into a corner and have it out with him. Because she was done keeping his secrets. Either he told the truth or she did.
Just thinking that statement made her sick to her stomach. Jana was going to be hurt, and Teddy would protect his sister. Rick might have been the one who cheated, but Beth had known and was guilty by her sin of omission.
She sucked in a breath and crossed to her bathroom. Her hands were shaking so much, she could barely put on makeup. She gave up on eyeliner and just put on a little mascara. She had already put her hair in hot rollers, so that was easy. Once in her closet, she thought about the restaurant where they were all meeting. It was nice but casual. She slipped on a sleeveless dress and sandals, then pulled out the rollers and fluffed her curls.
As she collected her bag and her keys, she fought against the sense of dread building inside of her. Everything about the moment felt inevitable. From the second she’d seen Rick with Galaxy, she’d known she was going to pay the price, and that time was now. She wanted to be optimistic, but she couldn’t see any way this night ended well.
She was the first to arrive at the restaurant. She handed her keys over to the valet and paced in the foyer while she waited, her body on edge, her mind racing. Her emotions alternated between rage and bitterness. She wanted to scream at Rick and demand he not mess up her life. She wanted to know when he’d changed and have him tell her how she hadn’t noticed. She wanted her old brother back—the one who never knew what to say and who came to her to help him navigate the emotionally confusing world he existed in.
“Well, you’re beautiful. Are you waiting for someone, or can a guy dream you might be single?”
She turned and saw Teddy walking in, Jana next to him. His smile was familiar, as was her body’s reaction to him being near. She instinctively rushed toward him, arms outstretched. He caught her and hung on to her so tightly, she couldn’t breathe.
This, she thought frantically. This moment, this man. This was what she wanted, what she needed. He was everything and more, and she was in love with him. She probably had been from that first night.
He drew back just enough to lightly kiss her. She didn’t want to let him go, but reluctantly released him. His smile returned.
“That was a really good greeting,” he teased. “Makes me want to go outside and come back in again.”
“You can if you’d like,” she told him, doing her best to act normal when she mostly wanted to beg him to run away with her. Only there was nowhere to go that the truth wouldn’t follow.
She turned to Jana and hugged her. “How’s the studying going?”
Jana groaned. “Good, I think. Either I’m totally prepared or I don’t understand the material at all.”
“I think that means you’re prepared.”
Teddy put his hand on the small of Beth’s back. “Shall we get our table or should we wait for Rick?”
“Why don’t you two get the table and I’ll wait here for Rick,” she said, not quite meeting his gaze. “I want to talk to him about Agatha for a second. It won’t take long.”
She thought they might push back or at the very least question her, but they both just nodded. Teddy gave her a quick kiss before he and his sister went to the hostess and gave their name.
Beth waited until they were led to the table to start pacing again. She anxiously watched the door, then lunged for her brother when he walked in.
“There you are. Why didn’t you call me back?”
He stared at her. “What’s wrong with you?”
She grabbed his arm and led him outside. “I left you messages and texts. You could have gotten back to me.”
She led the way to the side of the building and glared at him. “Dammit, Rick.” Tears burned. “You lied to me.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about. Why are you upset? Do you have your period?”
The verbal dismissal made her want to slug him. Instead she poked him in the chest and glared at him. “You don’t even have to try to be an asshole, do you? It just kind of comes naturally. Galaxy stopped by today.”
Under any other circumstances, his look of surprise would have been comical. He blinked several times, then took a step back.
“Galaxy?”
“Yes. You remember her, don’t you? The two of you have been going out for nine months!” She had to consciously lower her voice. “You lied about all of it. You’re not cheating on Jana, you’re cheating with her. Galaxy thinks you’re in love, but that can’t possibly be true, because that would require you to have a heart, and you obviously don’t. You lied to everyone, including me.”
“Stop saying that,” he told her, then glanced over his shoulder. “Who I’m seeing shouldn’t matter to you.”
“What?” Her voice was practically a yelp. “Not matter? Jana’s my best friend. She matters to me, and you’re hurting her. Teddy’s her brother. I’m dating the brother of the woman you’re cheating on.”
“I told you to stop seeing him,” he said, his voice low and angry. “You should have listened.”
She couldn’t believe it. “That’s it? That’s all you have to say? I kept your secret because I believed your song and dance about making a mistake before. But none of it was true. You were playing me.”
His glare was cold. “You make it so easy.”
It was as if he’d slapped her. She inhaled sharply and stared at the man she thought she knew. But there was no familiar Rick in his angry expression—he wasn’t anyone she recognized at all.
“I don’t get the game,” she told him, “but I’m no longer taking part in it. Either you tell Jana the truth or I do.”
He grabbed her arm, his fingers biting into her skin. “The hell you will.”
“Unless you plan to physically lock me up, you can’t stop me. You’ve been cheating with Jana since the first day you asked her out. She deserves to know the truth. Man up, Rick. Or is that too much to ask?”
“Beth?”
Her body froze, but that wasn’t enough to block out the horror of looking up and seeing Teddy standing there. At first he looked confused, but then his face tightened as if he were grasping what he’d overheard.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
And just like that it was done, she thought sadly. All her hopes, all her dreams—they were gone. There was no recovery from what had happened or her part in it. The pain was physical, nearly stealing her breath. Still she forced herself to move toward him. No matter what, she was going to tell the truth.
“Don’t,” Rick commanded.
She ignored him and stopped in front of Teddy. “Rick’s been seeing someone else the whole time he’s been dating Jana. I didn’t know until a few weeks ago when I saw them together. I confronted him, and he promised he would end things with Galaxy. He swore it was over, and I believed him. He allowed me to think that Jana was the girlfriend and Galaxy was the one he was cheating with. But it was the other way around. I found out when she came to see me today and told me everything. He and Galaxy have been going out for nine months. He never broke up with her. She says they’re in love.”
She saw Rick turn and walk away, then returned her attention to Teddy.
“I swear Rick told me they’d broken up, and I believed him. He said he’d made a terrible mistake and Jana was the one.”
Teddy was right there in front of her, listening intently, but to her it felt like he was a million miles away. She couldn’t say exactly why. It was probably something in the way he was standing or how he looked at her. But with every word, he grew more and more out of reach.
“So you didn’t tell,” he said quietly. “You kept it to yourself. You came into my house, played with my children, slept in my bed, and all the while you were lying to me and hurting my sister.”
She felt tears on her cheeks but ignored them. “I thought it would be all right. I thought Rick cared about Jana. She’s my friend. I would never do anything bad to her.”
“Yes, you would. You did. Deliberately.” His shoulders slumped. “I thought I knew you.”
“Teddy, don’t say that. You do know me. He’s my brother. I had to protect him.” But even as she said them, she knew the words were foolish. Protect Rick? From what?
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry. I was wrong, and if I could change what I did…” She brushed away the tears. “Only it wouldn’t matter, would it? Because Rick would still have cheated, and that was the end.”
“Jana’s my sister. I thought she was your friend, and she did, too. Shame on us.”
With that, he walked toward the restaurant, leaving her alone.
* * *
Jana stood in her room, trying to understand what had just happened. One second she’d been anticipating a fun dinner with Rick, Beth and Teddy, and the next her brother was saying they had to leave. It was only after they were in his car and had driven a few blocks that he pulled over and told her what he’d learned. She still couldn’t believe it. Rick had cheated on her and Beth had known? No. That wasn’t possible. She wouldn’t believe it of either of them.
She was still in shock, she thought as she unzipped her dress and let it fall to the floor. She had to be. Otherwise she would be hysterical or crying or something. But she only felt numb—and possibly confused. Nothing about the situation made sense. How could it?
She changed into yoga pants and a T-shirt, then went out to check on her brother. Dex and the kids were still out to dinner, but they would be back soon.
She found Teddy in the kitchen, leaning against the island and staring at the wall.
“You okay?” she asked.
“No. You?”
“Nothing’s sunk in.” She pulled up a barstool and sat down. “Tell me again what she said.”
“You really want to hear it?”
“I think I have to.”
“Rick cheated. Beth knew and didn’t tell either of us. They both lied.”
As far as recaps went, it was short and brutal.
Rick had cheated. There was another woman in his life. There had been the whole time. When he’d stood there, asking her out, acting like he was scared and saying she glowed, he’d been involved with someone else.
“But he was so nice,” she whispered. “Funny but awkward and unsure.”
“Apparently not.”
The first stab of pain caught her unaware. It went fast and deep, cutting through the happy numbness. Her breath caught.
“I can’t believe it.” Not of him and not of Beth. “She was my friend. Oh, no.” She looked at Teddy. “What are you thinking?”
“Nothing you want to know.”
“It wasn’t her fault.”
Even as she said the words, she wondered why she was defending the other woman. Beth had known what Rick was doing and hadn’t said anything.
“I trusted her,” she whispered.
“So did I.” His voice was stark. “She was your friend, my lover, and she betrayed us both.”
The pain grew, shattering whatever wall she’d put between it and her heart. There was no escape, no place to hide.
Teddy’s phone buzzed. He glanced at the screen. “Dex is on his way back with the kids. Go wait in your room. Once they’re in the house, you go with Dex.”
“I don’t understand.”
“You need to talk to someone, and I can’t be that person.”
“But you’re hurting, too.”
“You won the coin toss.” He offered her a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “I’ll figure this out on my own.” He was retreating—at least emotionally. He’d done the same when Valonia had died. Teddy preferred to mourn in solitude.
“I want to help,” she said, unable to stop the words.
“Tomorrow, maybe.”
She went to him and hugged him. “I know she cares about you. I’ve seen it in her eyes.”
He stepped back. “Maybe we saw what we wanted to see. Maybe none of it was real. Maybe they’re exactly alike.”
She wanted to protest that wasn’t possible. Beth was great. She adored Linnie and brought Jana food every Thursday. Only she hadn’t wanted her dating Rick. At first Beth had been so against the relationship. At the time Jana had assumed Beth was judging her for her past, but what if it was something else?
Only if Beth had known about Rick’s cheating at the time, then she would have been protecting Jana by acting all bitchy. And if she hadn’t, then she really was a bitch.
“My head’s spinning.”
Her brother gently pushed her toward the back of the house. “Go wait in your room. I’ll distract Linnie so you and Dex can slip out.”
“He knows?”
Teddy nodded. “Not the details, but enough.”
She walked to her room and sat on the bed. Her chest was a little tight, and she thought maybe she was breathing too fast. Rick had another girlfriend. Galaxy something. The whole time he’d been with her, he’d also been with Galaxy. If it wasn’t so painful, it would be comical, she thought.
A few minutes later she heard the kids in the kitchen, followed by quiet. Seconds later, Dex knocked on her door, then opened it.
“Hey.”
He stared at her with a combination of concern and anger. She knew the latter wasn’t about her but was instead directed at the man who had hurt her. No matter what, Dex was going to be there for her. He was family, and he looked out for those he loved.
She crossed to him. He opened his arms, and she threw herself against his hard chest and hung on.
“I don’t know what to think,” she admitted. “I hurt everywhere and I’m so confused. None of this makes sense.”
“Let’s take a walk.”