35 | Heat
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It's embarrassing how much I miss Nolan the second we're apart. It's even worse that it's not easy to just see him, as much as I want to.
I really want to.
Two days has felt like a million years. The ghost of his breath on my skin, the feel of his lips against mine, his words whispered under hazy lights. Waking up in the morning with strong hands holding me steady plays in my head like it just happened.
I could just drive over to his but it would be stupid. With my mom needing the car for her night shifts it would only be possible during the day and Riley would definitely notice. Lying about lifts to Cathy's only goes so far. Nolan picking me up risks us being seen.
And anyway, it's not like we'd have all the time in the world. I'd still have to rush off to work or give myself just enough hours that Riley isn't suspicious of anything. Every good moment is still squashed with a big, red stamp that says wrong.
But it feels like the most right thing in my entire life.
"I feel overdressed," Riley blurts out, cutting through my lingering thoughts of Nolan, "Do you think I'm overdressed?"
I glance at her outfit, a long maroon red dress that clings to her body in all the right places, bunched in on the sides at her waist. Dainty jewellery matches, silver and sparkling across her olive skin. She looks gorgeous, the strong colour bringing out her brown eyes.
"You look fucking amazing," I assure her, throwing a confident smile.
She just shakes her head, "Thank you, but that's not what I asked."
"You said this place was fancy, no?"
"It is, it's owned by some semi-famous Italian chef who can charge a million dollars for minuscule portions. But I feel like I'm going to the Oscars or something!"
She's rambling, which is what she does when she's nervous.
The words flow off her tongue like she can't stop them, her face twisting into an exhausted frown.
It's just a work dinner, albeit one to celebrate her promotion with all her important colleagues.
They're more wealthy, part of the influx of new Ivefield residents.
"Riley," I say, grabbing her hands and steadying them in mine, "You look great, you're not overdressed, I promise. The dinner will be amazing, go and enjoy yourself."
She opens her mouth to ramble again but I cut her off.
"I said enjoy yourself, Ava's orders."
She huffs but surrenders, muttering a fine before giving me a real, sheepish smile. Then, in dramatic Riley fashion, hugs me like we're never going to see each other ever again.
"Sorry, for stranding you here," She murmurs into my shoulder.
I roll my eyes as she pulls away, "Don't worry about it. I'm alone half the time anyway."
"I don't know how you do it. With my parents away the house has been so quiet, I've been losing my mind. I might go crazy when I move out."
Unlike Riley, who's constantly smothered in people, being alone is the only time I can think straight. I think too much actually, so much that it spirals out of control.
"Where exactly are your parents?" I ask.
She shrugs, "Some retreat hotel thing, I don't know. I kept pushing for Nolan to do more things with us, family outings, that sorta thing. My dad decided to be an ass about it and needed to blow off some steam for a few days."
"That sucks, I'm sorry."
"They'll come around..." She sighs, before checking the time on her phone and springing back into rushing mode "Shit. I've gotta go, I love you, mwah!"
I wave her goodbye as she scuttles down the driveway, the sound of her engine floating into the air then drifting away as her car drives into the distance.
I stand and watch, like some sort of proud mom whose kid is leaving for college.
I don't know why, maybe I just like the cool air brushing across my skin.
Or maybe I'm trying to cling onto every moment here, with Riley, before she leaves me.
It's only two weeks now. A few boxes have been packed, not enough probably.
Riley is also trying to clutch onto this place.
Whilst she decided between three different dresses, all of which I've never seen her wear, I stared at all the chaos littering the floors.
Childhood photos, teddy bears, a million hoodies, ten million books. It's like she exploded in her own room.
My house is much quieter, tidier. It almost feels like the ghost of a person lives here. With me and my mom on such different schedules the emptiness clings for longer. Riley's words about me being alone echo in my brain as I head inside to the kitchen.
I only get halfway through heating up some leftover lasagna before my thoughts devolve into that amazing but very, very,forbidden place.
Nolan.
I'm thinking about him. The way he came undone on top of me, his reverent touch, his perfect kisses devouring me whole. Every time his hands cupped my cheek or steadied my waist, that slanted, cunning smirk that turns my belly to mush.
It's not just the sex, every single second we spent together gave me so much warmth, so much steadiness. I let go, really let go, even if it was just for a night.
But the sex isn't helping with my thoughts because it was fucking amazing.
I can feel my cheeks go pink even alone in the confines of my own kitchen when I remember his cock in my mouth, the erotic moans that spilled from my lips as he filled me with every thrust. His groan into my shoulder as he came, buried deep.
I should text him.
No, I shake my head, trying to reason with myself, I shouldn't.
But I really miss him.
My fingers itch towards my phone on the counter, then I pull them away, deliberating. I scrunch my eyes shut, sighing out loud.
It's not a good idea.
But no one's here, no Riley, no parents, a few hours of silence. Usually that would mean more time for me to spend pondering every decision I've ever made but with Nolan in the picture it means something else,an opportunity.
I'm half a second away from picking up my phone when the microwave pings, saving me. I distract myself with the lasagna, picking at the sheets of pasta and meat, not even bothering to scroll through social media in case my finger slips onto me and Nolan's messages.
But when I finish eating the thoughts haven't disappeared at all.
Maybe I should just text him?
All of a sudden the doorbell rings. It throws me off so much I actually freeze for a second, forgetting I need to go and answer it.
As I scuttle forwards I wonder who it might be.
A package? Probably not at 7pm. My mom?
There's no way she'd have come home early without texting me first.
When I swing the door forwards my eyes widen, brain short-circuiting.
"Surprise!"
Did I manifest Nolan into existence, or am I dreaming?
"What are you doing here?" I splutter taking in his appearance.
Navy t-shirt that fits loose but seems tighter in the middle, clinging around those abs. Grey sweatpants hang low at his waist, making me cast my eyes down further than I should. It's cold out but the only evidence of that on him are his slightly pink hands, crossing his stomach as he grins.
"You're home alone," He says, then pauses like he's revealing a deeper truth, "I couldn't stop thinking about you."
Me neither.
I don't say that, opting for confusion instead.
"How did you even know I was alone?" My eyes scan that impressive build again, "And how are you not freezing."
"Riley mentioned her dinner thing and our parents. I remember you mentioning you and your mom's shift patterns."
It shouldn't be surprising but it is. I don't think the Nolan from six years ago would remember anything not pertaining to him.
"Oh, and I'm immune to the cold."
"Immune?" I question, almost laughing.
He nods, "Pretty much. Spent so much time in it it's like my body stopped caring."
I do actually laugh at that in a slightly baffled, slightly concerned way.
"So, are you going to let me in or will the neighbours be reporting our every move back to Riley the second she returns?"
I know he's joking but it does spike something in my pulse a bit. It's bad that he makes me so comfortable I forget we should be being careful. I step aside and let him in, my burning need for him fighting with the part of me that knows this is risky, probably wrong and dangerous.
But then he kisses me and all the air is knocked out my lungs.
His hand is on the side of my neck, anchoring his movements, guiding his tongue further down my throat as our lips dance like they're fighting for dominance.
It's a quiet hunger, slow enough that my heart thrums against my chest but fast enough that I'm trying to keep up with his rhythm, body aching for more.
When he pulls away I chase him, just like I always do and just how he likes. I notice it, the glint of something dark in his pupil as he watches. To me it just feels like instinct.
"Do you want a house tour?" I ask, cocking my head.
"No need, I saw enough of it not that long ago."
Oh, right.
I forgot about that.
I blink, hoping to get rid of the already arising pink ghosting my cheeks, "Right, the night you kidnapped me."
"You were drunk out of your mind, Ava."
"And I didn't ask for you to take me home."
He squints his eyes, like he's trying to figure out what game I'm playing.
I wish I knew too. I just cringe at the thought of him seeing me like that, messy and rambling and collapsing onto my bed like a sunbathing seal.
I probably looked terrible. The embarrassment is making me defensive, a bit stubborn maybe.
"You said thanks at the time," Nolan adds, voice slipping into something deeper, assessing my every move. His shiny eyes, more brown in the darkness, make my stomach do summersaults.
"Well now I'm revoking my thanks," I mutter.
The second I say it his hand gently brushing the nape of my neck tightens, just a fraction but enough that I feel it and my words evaporate. Somehow the hold is still gentle, like he's stopping me from drifting away.
"You're being bratty again," He hums, "Are you always like this during foreplay or is it just for me?"
My face cracks into a smile, eyes locked to his, but below that everything is turning into a heated chaos. My thighs clench, throat bobs, heart stammers faster. The air around me has changed with a few charged words.
"Who said this was foreplay?"
Nolan's thumb drags down the nape of my neck, comforting but in a sort of challenging way. Like he's physically trying to up the tension in the room.
"So you're not turned on right now?" He teases, pulling my head a little closer to his, "You don't get off on being all stubborn then giving in and getting what you want?"
His words are annoyingly spot on and this is only proving it. I like the way he tells me what to do, the clench of his jaw as I resist him, the spiralling pleasure it leads me to. His raw confidence spurs on the heat growing between my thighs.
"You have too much faith in yourself," I say back, fluttering those innocent lashes he can't resist, "You can't just walk through the door and make me wet just like that."
His eyebrow arches, matching his knowing smirk, "Wanna bet?"
The hand not in my hair starts to ghost down my side, faintly hitting my tight-fitting, long-sleeved top before reaching the cold slither of skin peeking out above my sweatpants. It's slow, but on a mission. A mission to prove his point.
I squirm under Nolan's touch, trying to hold my own and not move but knowing the lower he gets, the closer he'll be to exposing me. His fingers reach my waistband, toying with the soft material for a second.
"This does nothing to you? At all?" Nolan murmurs, eyes completely glued to the open skin above my waist.
"Nothing," I whisper, but I'm a big fat liar.
I'm soaked.
The second his fingers attempt to dip underneath I slip out his grip and speed down the hallway. I can't have him unravelling me right in front of the door.
My escape is met with his low chuckle before his footsteps follow me towards the living room. It's smaller than his family's one but still cozy, a long couch lining the space opposite the TV. I stand in front of it and for a second, have a very risqué thought.
I could just speed run this, take my top off, give him a bit of a show.
My brain has never been wired like that, I've never wanted to show off my body or do anything that puts me in a position of power, definitely not sexual power.
But like everything lately, I'm changing. I have new boundaries of what I can do, who I can be, how I want to act.
I throw off my top just as Nolan gets through the doorway, revealing a black, lacy bra that frames every inch of my breasts, holds them like valuable objects. Flush creeps up my neck immediately, brain taking a second to catch up with my impulsiveness. I guess I'm spontaneous now.
"Fuck," Is all Nolan groans lowly as he stares at me.
That wild fire has been lit in his eyes, unexpected and raging fast. His gaze traces over every curve of my skin, flicks between my face and bra with unrestrained hunger. All the teasing before felt like the boundary, now I've crossed it.
He takes two strides forwards, still giving me space but close enough that his hands almost reach out instinctively to grab my waist. They don't, twitching at his side as he bites down on his lip and watches me intensely.
After a second his head tilts as if he's just now figured out how to deal with this situation.
"Joggers," He commands.
He wants them off. He wants to see the mess I've made under them.
I look down, purposely naively, then meet his eyes again, "No."
"Ava," He practically growls, gaze so sharp it might kill me, "You can't put on a pretty little show like that and not finish the performance. Take them off."
I step closer, so that our lips almost brush, "Make me."
I regret it as soon as I say it.
His hands snatch for my waist but I wriggle out the way, almost trying to run.
I laugh-scream as his hands make contact, forcing me backwards onto the couch, my body absorbing the soft fall.
He pauses for a single second, figuring out if he should keep trying, but when I throw him a challenging smile and attempt to sneak out from under his grip he gets it.
His hands grip the waistband of my sweatpants, forcing them and my panties down to my knees.
I still try to escape, giggling like a crazy person as I twist, somehow ending up on my stomach.
Just at that point Nolan's hands dart out, one landing on my back, pinning me down, the other pinning my wrists above my head.
I freeze. I'm trapped.
In our scuffle he's ending up completely pressed on top of me, not in a painful way, in a dominant, consuming way.
In front of me is the armrest of the couch, a few pillows and half-sheltered view of the living room but all I can feel is Nolan's breath, low and heavy at my ear.
Goosebumps coat my skin, trickling all down my neck as his grip stays tight.
"You're having fun with this, aren't you?" He breathes after a second, laughing off the effort it took for him to get me like this.
The words hit me but don't completely soak in. My attention is distracted by the hard length stiffening just above my ass. It's not just there and insistent, it's moving, and I don't even know if Nolan realises he's doing it. It's small, but he's grinding his bare cock against my lower back.
He must've pulled down his pants and boxers down too.
"I think you're having fun," I murmur, but there's less playfulness to my words now, it's all heat.
I can practically hear the grin across his lips before he places a soft kiss behind my ear, dragging his tongue across the skin as I tilt my neck, giving him better access.
He sucks hard, too hard probably, but it's so good a breathless little noise falls from my mouth.
It makes him rut harder, shamelessly pushing his cock faster into me.
I feel myself squirm, dripping pussy seeking relief as the picture of him getting off on top of me explodes in my brain.
He notices, whispering in my ear again, "Touch yourself."
I want to tell him to touch me himself but the order snaps me to attention.
One of my hands moves on its own, snakes down under my stomach and finds its way between my thighs.
The second I graze the sloppy mess I moan, harder than I should from a little contact.
I circle my clit with my thumb before pushing two desperate fingers inside.
"Fuck," Nolan groans, rhythm undeniable now as he grinds in short, pleasure-seeking bursts, "Watching you fuck that wet little pussy whilst I grind against you might be the hottest thing I've ever seen."
I curl my fingers harder just as my pussy clenches at the sound of his dirty words. The result is another embarrassing moan, whimpery and soft as the pressure of his body on top of mine keeps me in place. This is exactly where I want to be.
Nolan's hand which has weakened around my wrist snakes into my hair, pressing my face down into the pillow beside the armrest so my cheek squishes against the material. I thrust my fingers deeper inside me, play with my clit until my next pathetic noise is loud and muffled by the couch.
"What was that, baby?" He taunts, fingers on my back circling gently in opposition to the force he's holding me down with, "I can't hear you whilst you fuck yourself silly into that cushion."
The pressure changes for a second as he readjusts himself.
His back rises further off mine, both of his hands still keeping me down and anchoring him.
He grinds, fully, bucking into my skin over and over again, running every vein of his cock over me.
His balls slap against the top of my ass, the sound obscene in the silence.
"You feel so- fuck, Nolan," I whine, unable to finish my thought. He's not inside me but when I match the flick of my fingers with his wild thrusts he might as well be. I scissor my hands, stretching myself wider as my needy clit begs for attention.
The second Nolan's hand leaves my hair I know he's close. My head stays crushed into the pillow though, absorbing every noise, turning myself into a rag-doll as I fuck myself harder on my hand. The knot in my stomach spirals, I'm close too.
"I'm going to come all over you, okay, pretty girl?" He pants, voice reduced to a groaning mess, "Then you're going to come for me."
"Mhm," I manage, but it comes out as yet another breathy moan.
The sound of Nolan's free hand clasping around his dick almost sets me off alone. He stops grinding against me, sliding up and down himself, choking on his own breath as he works his cock above me. My fingers push deeper, harder, then rub my clit till my vision almost whitens at the edge.
"Jesus, Ava, I'm-" Nolan spits out just as he lets go.
I feel the warm spurts of cum paint my skin, some near my ass, the rest across my back. The sensation of the feeling, Nolan covering me in his release, makes me come too.
I gasp frantically into the pillow, hand slamming into my clit as my gaze dizzies, the room spins, my thighs shake with the intensity.
I twitch, fingers still in shock but pussy still chasing the aftershocks.
Pleasure shoots through my body, staying in the air for what feels like forever before subsiding enough that I can almost think.
Nolan's kissing me again, at the base of my neck, devouring the flesh like a starved man. He keeps going, kissing up and around my cheek, twisting my head around as best he can to place a strained peck on my lips. I can't fully meet it, my tongue just about lapping his lips, lazy and spent.
"You're incredible," He hums in praise, "So good touching yourself for me like that."
Heat curls low in my belly. He can't still speak like that, it'll make me want to go for round two, this time with him inside me. I'm still gushing around my fingers, too worried that pulling them out will make a mess all over the couch.
I try to twist, try to move, try to do anything but Nolan pushes me back down.
"Let me clean you up first," He says firmly into my ear before getting off me completely.
I miss the pressure, the closeness of all his heat crushing me.
But it's nice to watch him walk away, pulling up his joggers so he doesn't flash the neighbours through the kitchen window.
He comes back smiling, a warm rag in his hand.
He disappears from my vision again as he wipes his release off my back. It's nice, comforting.
When he's sure it's all gone he flips me onto my back so I'm staring up at him.
His eyes flash down to my hand still connected to my pussy in a matter of seconds.
Before he can decipher anything I slide it out and sure enough, a wet mess that would've almost certainly coated the couch drips down my thighs.
Nolan catches it with the rag, spreading damp warmth up my skin.
Before he can get to my fingers I lean upwards, pushing them towards his lips. He doesn't hesitate, just takes it, sucking off every one of my juices. It's so hot I think I might die right here, almost naked in just my bra, legs open and pussy bared to him.
My throat clenches, words struggling to come out. That was impulsive, animalistic even. It was a primal chase of pleasure, pent up sexual tension coming to an explosive peak. Neither of us had planned to fuck each-other's brains out, or I guess do whatever that was, but it happened.
The world falls into something floaty as Nolan's fingers bring my panties and joggers back up, my ass rising so he can get them fully around me still laying down. He's staring at me like he'll never let me out from under him again, like I'm the only thing on earth.
"Do you have plans this weekend?"
I frown at him, still sex-dazed.
"What?"
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