Chapter 5
Five
Silas
Knowing I need to snap out of my funk is easier than actually doing it. Guilt rests heavy in my gut, and I'm not quite sure how to make it go away.
Vivie has had eight years of heats with us, so how the hell did I not realize she was feeling distressed about me leaving for a few minutes? I should have known. More than that, I just shouldn't have left.
The fucking leg cramp I was dealing with needed attention before it became a full-fledged charlie horse. Kade tried his best to rub the spasm out, but I needed some space to stretch.
It wasn't worth it—I made my omega cry. I'd suffer all the pain in the world to never see her cry ever again.
"Fuck," I groan, gently hitting my head on the circular dining table.
Our third level is designed to be everything we need when Vivian goes into heat. As soon as you come out of the stairwell, there's a mini laundry room on the right. That’s where we treat cum stains, store extra nest materials, and it has a laundry chute that goes down to the washer and dryers.
Further from the stairwell, also on the right, is a mini living room.
A cozy couch and a mini window nest. Behind the couch is another wall of family photos—they're Vivie's favorites and some are pretty intimate.
Too intimate for the main level. We don't need visitors seeing us snuggled in our nest, post sex.
To the left of the staircase landing is the small kitchen that contains nutritious snacks, bottles of water, and sports drinks.
The fridge is often completely stocked during heat weeks so we don't have to be too far from our omega.
A mini stove and microwave provide the opportunity to give her warm meals while she's willing to eat.
The small kitchen is complete with a table for us to eat when we need a breather and some time to ourselves. Like right now, I have my back to the hallway that leads to our large pack room at the far side of the third level.
Our room is cozy, large, and has entryways to the extra large closet, bathroom suite, and nest. The nest has a separate entrance to the bathroom too.
We have a really amazing setup. Putting our skills in creating a perfect home for our omega is something we all take pride in. The multiple ceiling fans encourage our scents to mingle and spread throughout the level when all the doors are open.
Which is unfortunate for me right now because I just want to have a manly pout without a boner. So. Many. Boners. I feel raw and chafed, but I'm always ready to sink into Vivie's slick heat.
"Damn it," I huff and adjust myself without lifting my heavy head from the table.
"Is your vocabulary only swear words today?"
Looking up for a moment, I watch Kade strut into the kitchen and place his hands on the table in front of me. Thunk. I drop my head unwilling to converse at the moment.
Vivian's heat broke at two in the morning today, and she'll most likely be asleep for another few hours. It's only nine, so I wouldn't expect to see Jarek soon either.
Those two can sleep like nobody's business.
Kade taps a knuckle near my head, trying to get my attention. "Silas, do you forget I can feel you in my damn chest? What's wrong, love?"
"Nothing," I moan quietly.
At least that's what I'm trying to project. I really don't want to wake my omega up from her post heat slumber because I have my panties in a twist about a mistake I made. She doesn't deserve that.
"Bullshit. Tell me."
A chuckle slips free as I finally sit up and lean back in my chair. I cross my arms over my chest and inhale Vivian's scent from my sweatshirt. Little omega is always stealing our clothes.
"Silas!" Kade snaps and leans forward, making the table creak.
Rolling my eyes, I force myself to pay attention. "I'm fine, no need to jump over the table to make sure. Just thinking about how I made Vivian cry."
My explanation settles him a bit, and his frantic energy in the pack bond smoothes out. He better not have disturbed them.
"Anything could have set her off, you know that. Her heats are also an emotional time. Hell, I'm pretty sure she almost cried when I frowned at her toward the end, too. We can't predict what might upset her all the time."
That's a load of bullshit. "Um, isn't that our fucking job, Kade? To predict what might make our omega cry and keep it from happening."
Sighing, Kade scrubs a hand down his face and slumps into a chair opposite me. "I just mean anything could be a trigger while she's in heat. That's why there are three of us. She wanted you as close as possible. That's a good thing."
"Yeah...” I love how Vivian loves me; nothing will ever change that.
Except I have some new concerns. "She hissed at Jarek, and I didn't know she was distraught until I really focused on her tether, Kade.
Something's off. If she can't speak to us, and her bond felt muted when I left the nest, how are we supposed to know something is wrong? "
"Well, the fact that the bond felt muted is a start. I'll admit I didn't notice she was detaching even in her subconscious until Jarek reacted to her tears."
Fuck, my pack alpha sounds as guilty as I feel. "Maybe we need to be more alert for a while. Especially until we figure out if something's going on. She hissed, Kade."
"I fucking know that. I was there," he growls, but the worry in his gaze takes some of the harshness out of his words.
"You're right though. We need to be on top of it.
I don't mean smother her like we did before her heat because I actually think that was why she snapped.
But we need to pay more attention to what's going on beneath the surface. "
I nod, acknowledging the plan. Vivie is beautifully complex. Sometimes as men and a different designation, we tend to focus on the outside symptoms.
Not eating? Feed her. Not leaving her nests? Take her on a walk. Not smiling? Crack all the jokes possible.
She's not a robot or a dog. "We need to do better," I murmur, realizing how much pressure we put on her on the outside to feel better instead of searching inward.
"We will," Kade declares with a firm nod.
His dark hair is a mess even though he just got out of the shower. The curls dangling over his forehead make me smile a little. I love my alpha a little ruffled. I just wish it wasn't due to stress.
"You look like you need help relaxing." I wiggle my eyebrows suggestively, trying to break the tension like Jarek might do. Except sleeping beauty isn't here, and my beta instincts are screaming at me to make my alpha feel better.
Kade scowls and kicks my wandering foot away when I graze his calf. "Stay the fuck away from my dick. I need at least another hour before I let your naughty mouth get close to it."
Laughing, I lean forward in my chair. Instead of banging my head on the table like I was doing before he came in and yanked the negative thoughts out of my mind, I smirk at my alpha.
"Who said I'd suck you off, Alpha?"
Kade moves so his face is mere centimeters from mine. "You did. Don't think I didn't hear the rise of your heartbeat or the hitch in your breathing when I mentioned fucking that tight throat of yours."
Fuck, his mouth is so dirty.
"Even if I were blind to the obviousness of your arousal, I can smell how your dick just soaked your gray sweats, my love. But don't worry. If you change your mind, there's an omega who likes to suckle on my dick while I work."
"Kade," I moan, feeling precum ooze from my cock head.
He stands abruptly, putting my face at the perfect level to suck his precum from his sweatpants too. Before I can so much as inhale his heady scent, he bends and grips my chin. "Pancakes and bacon sound good?"
"How 'bout a fat, juicy sausage?" I tease, sounding breathless and ridiculous. The things this man can do to me even after a week long fuck fest...
"Naughty thing today," he hums and releases me. "You'll get your sausage, Silas. Don't you worry."
With that, he struts his tight ass right down the fucking stairs while I'm left here acting like, well...an omega in heat.
Damn it.