Chapter 24
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
K ate
I stare at my phone as the second call from Ronan in ten minutes makes it vibrate across the table. I know I should answer it and tell him I won’t be coming over tomorrow for lunch, but I don’t want to say that.
If only that damn brother of his hadn’t sat down to talk to us last night. If I didn’t hate Marius King before, I damn sure do now.
The phone finally stops, and I push it further away from me. Everything had been going so well between us. Now all I can think is my worries about Sabrina weren’t all for nothing.
Damn Marius!
Why couldn’t the nanny want him instead? He’s just as wealthy as Ronan, and he’s as single as they come. He’s also got the same good looks all the King brothers have, so why is she going after Ronan instead?
Even without thinking, I know the answer. Ronan isn’t just good looking and wealthy. He’s sweet, and compared to his brother, he’s a much better choice for someone who wants to be happy. Still, Sabrina doesn’t come across as a girl who’s looking for Mr. Right. Marius could surely give her what she wants.
My phone chimes, alerting me to a new text. I pull it back toward me and see it’s from Ronan. Oh, God. He probably knows I’m avoiding him and wants to know why. How am I going to tell him I can’t come over anymore because of her?
For nearly five minutes, I stare at my phone, refusing to read the message. I know what it says. Ronan is nothing if not wonderfully predictable. When he cares about someone, he doesn’t play games. He’s straight up about how he feels, so I know that text says something about how much he can’t wait to see me tomorrow.
I’ve dreamed of receiving a text like that again from him for nearly five years, and now that it’s finally arrived, I won’t even look at it. God, what is wrong with me?
My sister sits down in the chair across from me and rips open a bag of chips. Dressed in an old red t-shirt from her time at Cornell and black yoga pants with her dark hair up in a knot on the top of her head, she looks like she’s decided to stay in and lounge around here at my parents’ house today.
“Want any?”
I shake my head no. I couldn’t eat now if I had to. My stomach is in knots over what to do about Ronan.
“What’s going on? You look like something happened,” Kelly says as she chomps on potato chips.
Unlike Jessie, my sister is more like me, so maybe she’ll understand what’s going on. “I have a problem.”
She laughs and points at my face. “I already could tell that by your expression. You’re like me, Kate. We’d be terrible poker players. So what’s wrong?”
Blowing the air out of my lungs in a rush, I try to find the best way to explain what I’m dealing with. My sister is going through her marriage breaking up after her husband stepped out with another woman, so the last thing she needs to hear is something similar happening to me.
“It’s Ronan.”
That doesn’t say much, so she eats another chip and says, “I could have guessed that. He’s the only new thing in your life. I thought you were crazy about him.”
“I am. I’m crazy, head over heels in love with him just like I always have been. All it took was just a couple times together, and I’m as in love with him as I was when we broke up.”
She listens, crunching on those potato chips, and swallows a mouthful. “Ah, I get it. You’re afraid he’s going to cheat on you again. That makes sense. I’d probably feel that way about a guy if I started dating now too. But Ronan isn’t like that. I mean, yes, he cheated on you that once, but he was crushed when you left him over that. Don’t you remember how he would call and text every day after? I think if he wasn’t away at school, he would have camped out on the doorstep to see you.”
“That’s not what I’m worried about.”
At least she brought up the subject of cheating without crying. She must be feeling better. I bet if I mentioned that jerk husband of hers, she’d start bawling her eyes out, though.
Best to stay far away from that topic.
“Then what? Are you having a hard time with his disability?” she asks before grabbing another chip and popping it into her mouth.
What is she talking about?
“Ronan isn’t disabled, Kelly. He’s fine. He’s just working through what happened to him.”
That gets me an odd look, and she stops eating. Setting the bag of chips down on the table, she says, “He lost his hand in a car accident, Kate. He’s disabled now. You may not want to think of him like that, but that’s the way it is. I’m glad he’s working through things, but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s disabled.”
I’ve never thought of him as that until this very moment. Ronan has always been so much more than his physical body. I mean, of course I love how he looks. How could I not? His dark hair and dark eyes with his chiseled face and perfect mouth are nothing short of gorgeous. And that’s nothing compared to the rest of him.
But I fell in love with the person who made me smile and cared about what I thought, unlike the other boys at school who always seemed interested in only one thing—getting into my pants. Ronan was sweet. Is sweet. That’s what I love most about him. He’s a man who’s not afraid to show someone he cares about them.
He’s everything I ever dreamed of in a man all wrapped up into one incredible package.
“You know, it’s so typically you that you didn’t think of him as disabled. This is why you’re going to be a great teacher at that school. Kids need adults who see past what the outside is. You’ve got that in spades.”
My sister and I didn’t get along for a long time, but somehow through her sadness at the end of her marriage, she’s become one of my biggest cheerleaders. I like that.
“Thanks. I guess I just don’t care about him not having a right hand. To me, he’s still Ronan, the boy I fell in love with who I thought I’d spend the rest of my life with.”
Kelly returns to eating her chips and asks, “So what’s the problem?”
I hesitate to say anything about Sabrina, but since my sister already broached the subject of cheating men, I guess it’s okay. “There’s another girl,” I say quietly.
The stunned expression I see on my sister’s face says I might have been mistaken about her being able to handle that, so I quickly add, “He hasn’t done anything. Well, I’m not sure. Maybe he has. God, I don’t know.”
I’m surprised when she pushes the bag of chips away and sets her hands down on the table in front of her. “Okay, tell me everything. I have experience with this, after all, so I’ll know if he’s doing anything he shouldn’t be.”
“See that’s the problem. Why shouldn’t he do something? He and I aren’t exclusive like we were back in the day.”
She waves away that issue. “None of that matters. Now tell me what’s happening.”
I take a deep breath and start explaining the problem. “There’s a girl working for Ava and Matthias taking care of their kids. Not really a girl, actually. I’m not sure how old she is, but the way she fills out a bikini tells me she isn’t a girl at all. So let’s say she’s a woman. Pretty. More like beautiful. And she and Ronan spend time together. I don’t know how he feels, but I think she’s into him. Then I saw his brother last night, and he made things worse.”
As I tear up thinking about how frustrated that brother of his makes me, she grumbles, “Let me guess. Marius. I swear he’s the worst King of them all. What did he do?”
“He mentioned Sabrina like he knew something about the two of them together. I don’t know what to do, Kelly. I’ve wanted Ronan back for so long. I know you don’t understand how I could forgive him for cheating, but I did. And now that I have the chance to finally get what I want, this pretty thing with a gorgeous body who talks to him and makes him happy is getting in the way.”
My sister smiles at me. “It is what it is when it comes to what he did. The only person who has to forgive him is you, and you do, so that’s that. It’s settled. As for this Sabrina person, first of all, can I tell you how much I hate that name? Ever since that stupid witch show, I’ve hated it. I hate all witchy names, but that’s the worst. But I digress. She may be pretty, but she’s not you, Kate. Ronan never stopped loving you. I’d bet money on it.”
“But what if he sees her and thinks she’s the better choice? She’s not like me at all. She’s always happy, laughing and having fun. I’m me. Serious. A third grade teacher. Boring.”
I don’t mention how much better her body is. I just can’t say that out loud again. It’s bad enough it’s all I can think about.
“You’re not boring! You are who you’ve always been, Kate. So you’re serious? What’s wrong with that? The world doesn’t need any more clowns. We’re goddamned inundated with them everywhere you turn. Ronan fell in love with you knowing full well how serious you were. Do you remember how he’d sit at this very table and just watch you study? I’m going to admit something to you I’ve never admitted before. That made me so jealous. Here you had an incredible boyfriend who loved you because you were smart. None of my boyfriends ever liked that about me. It’s why I had to pretend to be bubbly or sexy all the time. Even that no good husband of mine never appreciated how smart I was. I abandoned my dreams of going to med school for him, and what did he do? The bastard cheated on me. Don’t ever doubt that being intelligent is a great thing, Kate.”
I know she’s trying to help, but I’m just not convinced I can make him want me like Sabrina can. “I get what you’re saying, but how can I compete against some bubbly girl? She’s got everything going for her. All I have is my big brain.”
“Nonsense! You’re fun too. You just have to make him remember the kind of fun you are.”
I lower my head and stare at her in disbelief. “And what kind of fun is that?”
My sister doesn’t miss a beat and answers, “The kind of fun some bimbo can’t understand. Ronan isn’t stupid. Unless something happened to him in that accident, he’s still got a head on his shoulders. Show him you know how to have a good time.”
She stops and then continues. “To be honest, though, I’m wondering if maybe you should just come clean with him. Tell him what you’re worried about. He might come right out and say he has no interest in her, no matter how bubbly or sexy she is.”
Looking down at the table, I mumble, “You should see her in a bikini. God, Kelly. I’ve never looked that good in my life, bikini or not. How can I compete with that?”
Kelly gently covers my hand with hers. “Here’s the thing. If it was Marius King, I’d say it’s game over. That guy has only ever been interested in women for their bodies. I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t know intelligence if it bit him on the ass. But this isn’t that King. This is Ronan, and he loved how smart you are. Remember that.”
As my sister returns to devouring potato chips, I look down at my phone. I can’t put off reading his message for any longer. I’ve never been one of those people who can freeze others out. I don’t have the gene for that, I guess. It’s probably because I’d hate it if someone did that to me.
Swiping across the screen, I press on the notification as my heart begins to pound in my chest. What I see isn’t anything like what I thought he’d say.
Kate, I called twice but you didn’t answer. I need to see you today. Will you come over to the house?
I look up to see my sister waiting for me to tell her what’s going on. The problem is I don’t know.
“That’s from him. We weren’t supposed to get together until tomorrow, but he says he needs to see me today. What could be wrong?”
She gives me a big smile. “Why does it have to mean something’s wrong? Sounds like he’s dying to see you. Text him back and tell him you’ll be over this afternoon. Then you can show him the kind of fun you can offer.”
Immediately, worry sets in, and I feel even more despondent than before. “But what if he wants to see me to say he’s not interested anymore?”
“Then I say good riddance. He must have lost his mind when he lost his hand. I don’t think that’s what he wants to say, though. This is Ronan. Your Ronan. Time to let anyone who believes they can step in and replace you know that’s not going to fly.”
I know a lot of what my sister’s saying is for her and not me, but I’m going to use it to bolster my confidence anyway. Ronan did love me once, and he loved me for how smart I was, among other things.
Now I just need to remind him of that, in case he’s forgotten.
I quickly text him back that I’ll be over right around two. Instantly, my hands start shaking, and I begin to doubt I can do what Kelly said I should, but I push those fears away.
It’s time to show the man I love that I’m the kind of person he can love in return.