29. caleb
29
caleb
“Dude, this place is sweet. Great hookup," Tony says, grinning as he pats me on the back.
Leave it to Sarah to help me rent out an entire rooftop patio just to throw a party in the hopes of luring Nathaniel here. We’re not sure it’ll work based on the fact that he said he needed to think about it—but it’s worth a shot. No turning back now.
“Yeah, man. Should be a great show,” I say with a smile. The whole crew is here, ready to show out. Jason’s setting up behind us on the drums, while Richard runs through some notes on the keys. I nod to the rest of the band, all busy getting into place. We used to jam together all the time inside Richard’s house, but ever since he got engaged to Christina—who’s a law major—we don’t play there as often.
The place is packed. Sarah clearly invited all her college friends, who brought more people along. I even recognize a few faces from high school. She really went all out to make this an actual party. I have to hand it to her. She may be my ex, but she’s an incredible friend.
I scan the crowd while adjusting the strap of my guitar over my shoulder. No sign of him.
“Relax, dude. He’s coming,” Tony says, giving my shoulder a reassuring pat. I glance at him and offer a small smile. I’m genuinely grateful he took the news of me being bisexual, and in love with a guy (not just any guy, but Nathaniel ), so well.
Did he stare at me blankly for forty-five minutes without saying a word? Yeah. But honestly? That beats the gut-punching laugh or the butt jokes I thought I was going to get. He apologized for how much of a dick he was to him back in high school and even insisted on apologizing to Nathaniel—going so far as to plan on asking him to go for a workout sometime. He’s still my buddy, and that’s pretty damn cool.
“Hey!” Sarah’s voice cuts through the crowd and the noise in my head. I turn toward her. She rushes over, dressed in a short black dress with pink floral prints and little bows tied at the shoulders. Her hair is pinned back, with soft blonde strands falling around her face. She looks both adorable and stunning.
She wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me in close.
“Hey, beautiful,” I say into her neck. “You look amazing. If I wasn’t so into your best friend, I’d be all over you.”
“What a weird thing to say,” she laughs, stepping back. “You make it sound like a Jerry Springer episode.” She playfully slaps my arm.
I laugh, running a hand through my hair, hoping it looks just right.
“You look great,” she says with a soft smile, brushing a few strands of my black hair in front of my eyes. “I’m sorry he’s not here. I really tried.” She pouts.
My heart sinks. I knew there was a chance he wouldn’t show, but hearing it out loud stings.
“It’s okay. Life’s long. I’m sure I could just... I don’t know—pick up a phone like a normal person and call him.” I roll my eyes, laughing it off.
“See, now that sounds like a good idea.” She smiles widely, smacking me on the chest playfully with the back of her hand.
“Yeah, but where’s the fun in that, huh?” I wink.
“Oh, Caleb. You and your idea of ‘fun,’” she says, shaking her head.
Then, her smile fades as she glances down at her black heels. “Listen, Caleb. I was going to tell you after the party, but... I can’t wait. This is kind of my going-away party.”
I stare at her, stunned. “Sarah, w-what are you—?”
“I’ve decided to move to Australia for a couple months.” She shrugs. “You and Nathan weren’t the only ones who figured something out about yourselves in Toronto. I realized... I don’t know what I’m doing. I strung along two guys for four years to the point where they followed me across the country. I’m a mess.”
“I think most people would call you a legend , actually,” I huff.
She folds her arms across her chest and sighs. “Caleb... I just... I need to figure myself out. I don’t know what I want—or who I want. I need a change.”
I think over her words and slowly nod. “As much as that really sucks... if there’s anyone who gets an impromtu trip to figure your shit out...it’s me.” I inhale deeply. As much as it’ll suck not seeing her, I’ve got to be selfless here. I continue, “I’m proud of you. You deserve to go through whatever change you need. I’ll still be here when you get back. Hell, I’ll even come visit you.”
She gasps, happily. “You’d chase me all the way to Australia?”
“I’ll always be one step behind you. You can’t outrun me forever,” I wink.
“Ugh, that’d be creepy if I didn’t love you so much,” she says, wrapping her arms around me again. I pull her in for a tight hug. I’m really going to miss her, but I know we’ll both be okay.
“Caleb, we’re starting up,” Tony calls, tugging at my arm. I glance back at Sarah, who gives me a little wave and smile before walking off. I follow Tony toward our makeshift “stage area.”
I step up to the mic and look out over the crowd. Everyone’s caught up in their own little world—and it kind of hurts. All I can think about is looking out and finding a pair of green eyes out there, locked on me. I miss those emerald eyes.
“Testing, testing,” I say into the mic. The crowd quiets, and all eyes shift toward the band. This is what I love—being center stage.
“Thanks for coming to this rocking party, thrown by the beautiful, wonderful Sarah Lockwood. Everyone give it up for Sarah!” I shout into the mic. The crowd erupts in applause and cheers.
“I want to take a second to thank this amazing girl for being such a special part of all our lives. You’ve taught me so much and helped shape who I am today.” I grab the vodka Sprite I left at the side of the stage and raise it.
“To Sarah,” I say into the mic. Everyone echoes it and chants her name. I find her in the crowd and she beams at me. “May you find all that you’re looking for.”
I tip my glass toward her and take a big swig.
“Okay, now... let’s PARTY!” I shout.
The audience erupts as the band kicks things off with our first song.