27. Chapter 27
Chapter 27
Finn
I tightened my hands along the soft leather of the steering wheel before turning onto the dirt road that would take us to our destination. In my periphery, Tessa wiped what I assumed were clammy hands along her jeans.
She was nervous, and that was fine. But she had nothing to worry about. Tonight was strictly about getting to know each other better.
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous myself. This was the first time I’d been on a date in close to a decade. While I initially dated on and off when I became a SEAL, I quickly learned few women were equipped to deal with the realities of dating someone in my line of work. Eventually, I settled on one-night stands to scratch the itch, but I knew one night with Tessa would never be enough.
It had been almost a week since she agreed to go out with me. When Tessa asked about my plans for our date, I refused to tell her anything other than to dress comfortably. I was determined to woo her properly, even if our first date was happening on a Monday. Nothing about us was conventional, and I liked it that way.
Despite the fact we were living in the same house, I was determined to treat this date like I would any other. Before we left, I knocked on her bedroom door to ‘pick her up.’ When she opened the door, my jaw dropped before I quickly snapped my teeth together to keep my tongue from falling out.
Her long brown tresses were curled into soft waves that fell to her breasts. She wore a simple black top and skinny jeans. When I saw she paired the look with the same thigh-high boots from her first night at work, I had to fight the urge to throw her over my shoulder and haul her to my bedroom.
Ordering my cock to calm down, I tightened my grip on the bouquet I was holding behind my back before pulling it out and presenting the flowers to her.
Tessa’s eyes sparkled up as she took in the Tiger Lilies I procured from the flower shop in town earlier in the day.
“Oh, Finn,” she murmured, her eyes developing a glassy sheen.
“I wasn’t sure what your favorite flower was, but these kept catching my attention when I was looking around.”
At the sight of her tears, I kicked myself for already fucking up our first date. I was about to apologize for whatever I did wrong when she put me out of my misery.
“These are amazing. Thank you,” she said taking the bouquet from me. Her head dipped to inhale their fragrance. “My mom’s name was Lily,” she explained. “On their first date, my dad thought he was being clever and bought them for her.”
With a soft smile, she continued, “She said she always preferred daffodils before that, but when my dad showed up at her house, he claimed she deserved flowers as beautiful as she was. From that day on, lilies were her favorite. He used to buy them for her all the time when I was a child,” Tessa murmured as she wiped a stray tear from her face.
The tension I was holding eased when she finally looked back at me. “Thank you so much, Finn. This means more to me than you can imagine.”
Before we left, she placed the flowers in a vase of water. When I held the passenger door open for her, she asked once more where we were going. I refused to spoil the surprise, only telling her it wasn’t far before closing the door and jogging around to the driver’s side. She fidgeted in her seat once inside, but the sparkle in her eyes told me it wasn’t from anxiety. She was excited for our date .
The truck jolted while we made our way down the old, dirt backroad that led onto my parents’ land. The tree brush thickened, giving the appearance it was closing in around us right before the truck broke through the edge of the forest.
I heard Tessa’s sharp inhale as she took in the meadow before us. In the last couple weeks, the snow melted, and spring spread across the valley. While it wasn’t unheard of for us to get snow during the month of May, I intended to take full advantage of our unseasonably warm weather.
Massive trees bordered the meadow, creating a barrier from the outside world. Soft shades of green spread across the enclosed space. The setting sun illuminated the yellow and white wildflowers sprinkled throughout the field, swaying slightly in the intermittent breeze.
Over the last week, I wracked my brain for the perfect place to take Tessa for our date. When my mother mentioned the meadow bloomed early this year, I knew immediately this was where I was meant to bring her.
I pulled the truck to a stop in the center and hopped out. Still distracted by the beauty surrounding us, Tessa was unbuckling her seatbelt when I opened her door. I held out my hand, which she grasped tight before sliding down from her seat.
Her body pressed against mine when her feet hit the ground. Since she wore boots that almost brought her to my eye level, her mouth was closer than usual.
I stared at her lips while the desire to kiss her consumed me. After staring at her for several moments, I mentally shook myself and stepped back. Her eyes darted away from me before she tucked her chin to her chest.
Right. Slow, asshole. Tonight was all about taking things slow. Despite my best efforts to relay the purpose of tonight’s activities to my cock, the bastard refused to forget our connection at the lake. The way her body felt pressed against mine. The way she looked when she came on my fingers.
Walking toward the back of my truck, I discreetly rearranged my rapidly hardening dick as I went. I flipped down the tailgate and removed the truck bed cover to reveal our hideaway for the evening.
Despite the warmer weather, the ground was still soggy. Wanting to spend the evening here without getting our clothes soaked, I filled the truck bed with blankets and pillows.
Tessa joined me, her heel sinking into the soft ground when she walked. “Crap,” she hissed.
I strode over to where she stood before slipping one arm beneath her knees, firmly latching my other arm around her torso and picking her up. A surprised yelp escaped her before I carried her to the tailgate and set her on the platform.
“Finn, you didn’t have to do that,” she admonished.
“Of course I did,” I replied, running my hand up the side of her boot. “Can’t have anything happening to these boots. They’ve starred in far too many of my recent fantasies.”
Tessa’s cheeks blushed fire engine red at my comment. I chuckled and walked to the cab of the truck to grab the cooler containing our dinner.
By the time I made it to the back of the truck again, Tessa slid herself backward onto the thick pad of blankets covering the entire bed of the truck.
Hopping up, I unlaced my muddy boots and set them on the ledge. Tessa followed suit and removed her own while I settled into our nest, handed her an extra blanket, and pulled the cooler within reach before settling against the back of the cab.
My mouth watered when I set out the roasted chicken sandwiches, Amish potato salad, and apple pie I picked up in town earlier. When I stopped by the diner after picking up Tessa’s flowers, Ms. Hilson handed me the food, a knowing smile etched across her face.
I couldn’t remember the last time I ate at the diner, let alone ordered take out. Even without the rumors floating around town since her arrival, there was little doubt the whole town suspected something was going on with Tessa and me by now. My presence during each of her shifts was the most time I spent in town since high school. Ordering picnic food for two would only add fuel to the fire.
Tessa moaned as she bit into the sandwich, the sound painfully similar to the noises she made when I touched her at the lake. My cock throbbed behind my zipper. I did my best to ignore it, but it was going to be a long night if she kept making noises like that.
Shifting to hide the growing bulge from view, I focused on eating our food in comfortable silence while enjoying the scenery around us. Tessa released a sigh of contentment when she crumpled her napkin and tossed it in the cooler before returning her attention to the landscape.
Seeing her stare across my family’s land, looking more peaceful than ever, I couldn’t shake the deep-seated feeling of rightness settling in my bones. Tessa belonged here with me.
Swallowing my last bite of food, I asked, “What are you thinking about?”
Tessa turned her face toward me, her lips curving into the soft smile I quickly became addicted to.
“My mom,” she answered, inclining her head toward me.
I sat there, trying to decide whether I should let the topic drop. She didn’t seem upset by the mention of her mother, so I prodded a little further.
“Yeah? You want to tell me about her?”
Tessa gnawed on the corner of her lip before turning her attention back toward the meadow.
Kicking myself for pushing her too far, I gathered our trash, settling back against the cab when she finally spoke.
“For all intents and purposes she was a stay-at-home mom,” she said before looking back toward me. “I’m sure you’re well acquainted with how often military families move.”
I nodded but remained silent.
“Since we moved so often, she didn’t have a job in the traditional sense…but she had this camera.”
When Tessa’s eyes met mine, they glistened with memories of a woman who clearly meant the world to her.
In the almost two months I’d known Tessa, I seen tears in her eyes far more often than I liked. She certainly had more reasons than most to cry. While I knew it was far better than suppressing emotions the way I did, it still slayed me every time I saw wetness in her stunning brown eyes.
“She took the most incredible photos, Finn.” The reverence for her mother’s talent was clear when she spoke. “Like the kind that should have won awards. She typically took them for families, usually other military members. Family photos, newborn shoots, a wedding or two, but when we came up here for vacation, she would capture the landscape in a way that made you feel like you could reach out and touch it.” Tessa’s voice turned wistful as she trailed off.
She slowly shook her head. “She must have taken thousands of photos over the years, but out of all of them I only have three left.” She turned away to hide a lone tear tracking down her cheek.
Needing to comfort her, I settled further down in the truck bed, propping my back up against several pillows and lifted my arm in invitation. Indecision warred across her expression before she made up her mind. My soul breathed a sigh of relief when she scooted over and nestled in the crook of my arm. With her head resting on my chest, I wrapped my arm around her torso and held her close, pulling a large blanket over us to keep the spring chill from nipping at her.
The fruity smell of her shampoo filled my nostrils when I bent my head and briefly pressed my lips against her hair. Her hand rested on my chest, mindlessly trailing across the fabric of my shirt. The simple intimacy caused a broken piece in my chest to click back into place.
“I always wanted to take up photography as a way to feel closer to her,” she murmured.
Turning my head towards the sky, I saw the stars peeking through the darkening sky.
“There’s still plenty of time to make that happen,” I assured her.
She shrugged her shoulder, and I decided to let the subject drop. Her face turned toward the constellations.
“It really is incredible out here,” she mused. “I know I saw them when I was a kid, but I almost forgot what the stars looked like after living in L.A. for so long.”
“Yeah, they sure are incredible,” I agreed, staring down at the woman in my arms.
She let me hold her, our breaths syncing while we laid beneath the starry sky. I almost thought she’d fallen asleep when her voice cut through the stillness.
“Why did you bring me here?” she asked, insecurity laced in every word. I looked down at her as she rushed to add, “It’s not that I’m not grateful. I am. No one has ever done anything like this for me. And this place is like something out of a fairytale.” She paused, her fingers drawing a figure eight pattern across my chest. “I guess I’m wondering if this is the kind of thing you do with all your dates…” she trailed off, stubbornly refusing to look at me.
I tucked her soft body closer to my own before pressing another kiss to the top of her head. “Tessa,” I murmured against her soft curls. She held still for several moments before finally giving me what I wanted. Her head tilted up, her dark eyes meeting mine.
“I’ve never brought another woman here,” I confessed.
A heavy breath escaped her lungs, but I wasn’t done.
“As for the reason I brought you here…my parents had their first date in this meadow, and I guess it just seemed fitting.” Tessa’s brows furrowed, and I knew she wasn’t going to let it drop.
“Why?” she asked breathlessly. “Why did that seem fitting?”
Knowing I couldn’t give her the entire truth without the risk of scaring her off, I raked my left hand through the length of her hair, the corner of my lips tipping upward despite my silence. Thankfully, she let the question drop.
My thumb brushed the small scar left behind from her accident. I caressed the gently raised skin that would forever be a reminder of how she came into my life.
“This is healing up nicely,” I murmured before gliding my hand down to her neck, my thumb skating back and forth along the silky skin.
The air became charged while I continued to hold her gaze before slowly lowering my mouth toward hers. I watched for any sign she wasn’t ready for this, smiling to myself when she lifted herself closer.
Lightly brushing my lips against hers, I pulled back slightly before pressing more firmly against her.
Tessa’s tongue peeked out and traced the seam of my lips, a small whimper filling the space between us when her mouth opened for me. My tongue stroked in and out as my hands latched onto her hips. I pulled her up until her legs straddled either side of my waist, ensuring she could feel exactly what her mere presence did to me.
I drank in Tessa’s gasp while she slowly rocked against the hard length in my jeans. My hand tangled in her hair, and I pulled her mouth back to mine, unable to satisfy the thirst she created within me. I slid my other hand across her back, pressing her down onto my cock.
She began to rock her core over the bulge between my legs, and I groaned. Soft mewling sounds escaped her throat while I continued to take her mouth. Any shyness she felt evaporated, and she ground her hips against my cock. My balls pulled tight against my body as the friction between us built.
Fuck. If we didn’t stop soon, I was going to come in my briefs like a virgin.
As I began to pull away, Tessa’s body shook while an orgasm rocked through her. I opened my eyes, watching her features twist in pleasure. Determined to make this as good for her as possible, I continued to thrust my cock against her core, pressing her body against mine and erasing any space between us. My own orgasm loomed on the horizon, but I redoubled my efforts anyway.
Fuck it. If it made her feel even one tenth as desirable as she was, I’d gladly embarrass myself by coming in my briefs.
I watched her come down from her climax – a climax she felt safe and secure enough to take for herself. And fuck if that didn’t cause the caveman within to beat on his chest at the reality she trusted me enough to lose herself that way.
Her eyes fluttered open, her eyes glazed when she peered down at me.
Seeming to regain her faculties and comprehending what happened, her already flushed cheeks turned crimson. She covered her face with her hands while she tried to scramble off my lap, but I wasn’t letting her run away that easily. My hands gently latched onto her hips and held her in place.
“ Mo Chridhe ,” I murmured. When she shook her head and still refused to remove her hands from her face, I tried again. “Hey…baby, look at me.” I gently clasped my hands around hers, pulling them away from her face.
“Tessa, talk to me. What’s wrong? Why are you embarrassed?”
Apparently, that was the wrong thing to say.
“Seriously?” she demanded. “I just dry humped you until I came in less than a minute, Finn.”
A cocky grin spread across my face. “I know. Hands down, one of the best moments of my entire life. Second only to our time in the lake.”
Tessa’s jaw dropped in outrage as she stared at me.
I groaned. “Baby, you gotta shut your mouth before I come up with other things to do with it.”
Tessa snapped her mouth shut. I didn’t think her cheeks could get any redder, but I was wrong. Her mouth opened and closed several times while she seemed to debate how to respond. Apparently finding nothing, she leaned forward and buried her head against my chest.
Happier than I’d been in years, a full-body laugh escaped me. Tessa bounced slightly with the movement before peeking up at me from her hiding spot.
I raised my hand, cradling the side of her face.
“I can’t believe that happened,” she admitted.
“I can’t believe any of this is happening,” I paused. “But I wouldn’t trade it for the world.”
I watched her face as my own confession washed over her. Something soared in my chest when the look in her eye suggested her feelings might match my own.
Leaning up, I brushed my mouth against hers once more. Our kiss was chaste by most standards. There was no tongue, and our lips remained closed, but it was one of the most intimate moments of my life.
When she eventually pulled away and shifted off my lap, her leg brushed my still fully erect cock, making me groan. Half-straddling my waist, Tessa froze.
Looking for the source of my reaction, her eyes landed on the considerable bulge in my pants. She began to wring her hands together and refused to look at me. Latching onto her hips, I resettled her against my body.
“Hey,” I said gently. She continued to avoid looking at me, so I reached up and turned her face toward me. “That’s not your problem, okay? I enjoyed every second of what we did.”
She began to gnaw on her lip. Normally the gesture would have fueled my desire, but the blatant distress behind it cooled the lust in my veins.
“You mean…you mean you don’t want me to…” she trailed off, and I finally understood what spooked her.
My anger flared back to life when I thought about what that asshole must have done to garner this kind of reaction from her.
I waited until she was looking directly at me before I set the record straight. “Tessa, I need you to hear me when I say this.” Her eyes moved between mine while I talked. “If and when that ever happens, it’s going to be because you want it to. Not because you think you owe it to me, or because you think you’re supposed to, but because you want to be intimate with me in that way.” Her eyes widened at my statement. “And if that day never comes, then that’s fine too.”
Her expression turned skeptical at my final statement, so I clarified, “Don’t get me wrong, I want you like I’ve never wanted a woman before in my life. But I know you’ve been hurt. You’ve shared a few things with me, but I’m betting it was only the tip of the iceberg.” Her eyes overflowed, and her pain streaked down her cheeks.
“I am not your ex,” I reminded her, my voice coming out harsher than I would have liked. I shoved my anger back down, forcing myself to remember that in this moment, she was safe. Taking a deep breath, I willed my voice to soften. “And I am not going to threaten, coerce, guilt, or force you into anything you don’t want to do. When you are with me, it’s because you choose to be, because you want me the way I want you and for no other reason.
I swiped my thumbs against her cheeks, wiping away the tears continuing to fall.
“Are we clear on that?”
She searched my face for several long moments checking for any signs of deceit. She could look all she wanted. She would find none.
Finally coming to the same conclusion, she nodded slowly before relaxing back down against my chest. I wrapped my arms around her, pulling the blanket that shifted at some point back over us.
Holding her securely against me, I pressed another kiss to the top of her head. Her fingers clenched in the fabric of my shirt like she was terrified I would float away if she didn’t hold on tight enough. What she didn’t understand yet was that I wasn’t going anywhere unless she was by my side.
Burrowing down in our cocoon, I basked in the simplicity of the moment. The temperature continued to drop, and when Tessa began to shiver, I knew it was time to take her home. Reluctant to pop our bubble despite the awareness she was coming back with me, I kissed her head one more time before I gently slid her off me. Wrapping the blanket around her, I carried her to the passenger door, her insistence that she could walk falling on deaf ears. Not wanting to be away from her longer than necessary, I quickly cleaned up our gear and stowed everything back in the truck bed.
On the ride home, I found myself rubbing the spot above my sternum. I’d known for a while I was completely under this woman’s spell, but after tonight, I realized she had the power to destroy me in a way I never thought possible.