8. Sebastian
Chapter 8
Sebastian
Delete. Delete. I skim through work emails on my laptop, my finger tapping on the button. Delete.
“Sebastian.” My assistant enters the office. “Just a reminder that I’ll be leaving early today.”
“Right, thanks, Emily.”
“And I sent you the papers you wanted. Is there anything else you need?”
“Yes, can you please bring me some Ibuprofen? This pack is empty.”
“Already?”
I raise an eyebrow at her.
“Sure.” She exits the room and returns with another pack, handing it to me.
“Thanks.”
“Do you need anything else?”
“No, that’s all. Have a good weekend.”
“Thanks, you too.” With a smile, she closes the door behind her.
My eyes drift towards the city skyline.
Lil’s back .
According to Gemma, Lil is at odds with her uncle. Having her close by could potentially benefit me. What if I use her this time?
No, I’m not my father, and I’m not going to continue this feud.
But I enjoyed having her sleep in my arms, clinging to me. She smelled different.
Did she stop baking her cupcakes?
Anyway. It was only one night. One last time of playing our pretend game.
My finger taps on the delete button. I don’t even know what I’m deleting.
Fuck this. I won’t be able to do any work today.
I stand up from my chair, gather my belongings, and head to the gym. After changing into workout gear, I head straight for the punching bags.
Thwack. Thwack. Thwack.
Each punch lands with satisfying force. Sweat beads on my forehead, and I lose myself in the rhythm.
“Woah, easy there, champ!” Brandon’s voice cuts through my concentration. “What’d that bag ever do to you?”
“Needed to blow off some steam.”
“Yeah, I can see that.” He grabs his gloves. “Wanna go a few rounds in the ring? Might be more satisfying than beating up on that poor defenseless bag.”
I chuckle despite myself. “You sure you can handle me?”
“Please.” He climbs into the ring. “I’ve been handling your ass since college.”
I follow, and we square off, circling each other. Jab. Cross. Hook. The familiar dance branded in my bones.
“So,” Brandon says between punches, “what’s eating you, man? ”
I grunt, dodging a right hook. “What makes you think something’s wrong?”
“Oh, I don’t know, perhaps the way you were pummeling that punching bag like it owed you money?” He lands a jab to my ribs. “Plus, you’ve got that constipated look on your face that you only get when you’re overthinking shit.”
“Fuck off.”
We trade a few more blows, the only sounds our labored breathing and the smack of gloves on flesh.
“It’s Lil.” Brandon ducks under my right cross. “Isn’t it?”
My jaw clenches. “What about her?”
“Come on, man. You two have more baggage than a fucking airport.”
“I don’t care about her.” I falter, and he lands a solid punch to my gut.
“Fuck her out of your system once and for all, and then forget her. That bitch only used you. Did you already forget?
I straighten up. “Watch your fucking mouth. You don’t know shit about her.”
“Oh, I know plenty. I know she’s the reason you’ve been a miserable prick for the past few years.” He jabs at me again, but I block it.
“Shut up. I mean it.”
“Or what? You’ll punch me? Go ahead if it’ll make you feel better. But it won’t change the fact that you’re still hung up on her.”
Brandon’s right. I hate to admit it, but Lil still has a hold on me. Even after all these years, even after everything that’s happened between us.
“I tried,” I say.
“Not hard enough, apparently.”
“Fucking her doesn’t work,” I mutter.
He stops. “You tried? ”
“I thought I was over her. I thought I could move on if I got her out of my system. But seeing her again, being with her again… it was like no time had passed at all.”
Brandon’s eyebrows shoot up. “Hold up, you did what now?”
“The day she was supposed to get married. I paid a little visit to her hotel room. One minute, we were talking, and the next…” The memory of Lil’s skin against mine is still vivid.
“It looks like you’re about to get your heart handed to you on a platter. Again.”
“It’s not like that, man. I’m not some lovesick puppy pining after her.”
“Could’ve fooled me.” Brandon’s tone drips with sarcasm.
I throw a punch, but he dodges easily. “Look, it was just sex, alright? A one-time thing. A final farewell fuck, if you will.”
“Uh-huh.”
I aim a kick at his midsection, and he blocks it.
“Face it. You’re still into her. And from what I heard, she’s single. So, what now? You gonna try to win her back or some shit?”
“Win her back? After everything that’s happened? Nah, man. That ship has sailed.”
Brandon shrugs. “If you don’t, someone else will. And then you’ll really be kicking yourself.”
The thought of Lil with another man makes my blood boil. I know I have no right to feel this way, but I can’t help it.
“Is she worth it?” he asks.
I pause. “Fuck.”
“Exactly.” Brandon lands a punch to my shoulder. “Now, are we done here? Because I’ve got a hot date tonight, and I need to shower off all this feelings bullshit. ”
“Yeah, yeah. Naomi?”
“The woman’s got me wrapped around her little finger.” He grins, but there’s a hint of something more in his eyes. Something I recognize all too well. “And I’m not afraid to admit I’m the lovesick puppy for her.”
“Be careful, man.”
“Relax. I know what I’m doing. Besides, Naomi’s different. She’s not like Lil.”
“Yeah, well, that’s what I thought too. And look how that turned out.”
“You really loved her, didn’t you?”
Loved?
I busy myself with unwrapping my hands. The truth is, I still do. More than I ever thought possible. Being with Lil again was like coming home and being sucker-punched all at once. The way she felt in my arms, the way she responded to my touch… it was everything I remembered and more.
“Look, man.” He sighs. “It’s time to move on. What about Serena?”
“She’s not my type,” I say. “Besides, she has her eyes on someone else.”
“You’re gonna spend the rest of your life alone? Drowning in work and whiskey?”
“Sounds like a plan to me.” And tonight, I’ll start at the gala.
Brandon rolls his eyes, grabbing his towel. “Whatever, man. But remember, life’s too short to be miserable. And you, my friend, are the king of misery.”
I need a fucking cold shower.