Chapter 6
Shiloh
The house was quiet, other than the background noise of the home improvement show I’d put on the television. Holden’s dog, Banshee, curled up against me on the sofa, her soft fur a comfort as I tried to recalibrate my brain to my new reality.
The guys had gone to the auto shop, and Emory had shown me around the house before he headed out for his apprenticeship at a tattoo parlor.
He didn’t really look the part of tattoo artist, a little too refined—and his skin like a blank canvas—but he’d explained he was an artist just getting into the field.
“Maybe one day, I’ll have as much ink as Gray, but really, I just love seeing it on him.
As soon as I get the all clear, he’s giving me carte blanche to tat the fuck out of him. ”
I barely knew them, and I already envied their loving relationship.
Now that I was alone, I set my computer up in front of me, sorting through the messages on my cam site. There were reviews to approve, inquiries about my cancellations last night, and requests for private sessions in my inbox. Not to mention plenty of DMs from fans.
I needed to do damage control, but it was overwhelming. Was I really going to do cam shows here? I couldn’t do them at night—my usual timeframe—with the whole family here. I’d have to reschedule for daytime slots, which might disappoint some of my regular viewers.
I would just take a hiatus, but I couldn’t afford to give up my only source of income.
Hiding out here wasn’t a permanent solution.
My smartest move was to save up as much money as I could while still paying rent on my apartment.
If Brick and Curtis caught up with me, I needed to have enough to pay off Jimmie’s debt in full.
BigManD:
What happened to the show last night?
Shoot. DeShaun was a monthly subscriber with VIP access. I couldn’t afford to ignore him.
ShyGuy:
Family emergency. So sorry!
BigManD:
Is everyone okay?
ShyGuy:
They are now. But I’m away from home for a while. My schedule may have to get a bit creative to avoid awkward situations, if you take my meaning ;)
BigManD:
Ahhh, well, I’m just glad everyone is okay. I look forward to the next show. I want to try that new sex toy feature. Can’t wait to control your orgasm.
ShyGuy:
Like you didn’t before?
BigManD:
hahaha, yeah, but this is closer to actually touching you myself. You don’t know how much I’d like to get my hands on that hot little body for real.
My stomach tightened uncomfortably. When my fans tried to cross boundaries, I found a tactful way to make a fast exit.
Holden was the only viewer I’d ever let get personal with me.
Partially, because he didn’t get creepy when we talked.
He didn’t behave as if I were a commodity, just something to own.
He wanted to get to know me as a person, not a sex object.
That made all the difference.
I wrapped up the chat with DeShaun, explaining that someone was interrupting me.
Banshee nosed at my hand, and I stroked her. “Yes, that’s right. You kept me from being a liar, didn’t you? You need my attention.”
She grinned at me, tongue showing as I scratched behind her ears.
Another message popped into my DMs with a ding. I glanced up, half expecting it to be DeShaun prolonging our goodbye.
It wasn’t him. There was an anonymous name tag—not that unusual for cam viewers who didn’t want anyone identifying them.
You can’t hide. Cut the shit and get us our money, or we’ll fuck you up.
My heart lurched, and I slammed the laptop shut. My phone started vibrating on the coffee table. I eyed it uneasily.
It stopped. Then went off again.
And again.
Finally, I snatched it up.
Two missed calls from Sheila. A text from Nate. And a voicemail from an unknown number that had come in early this morning. Maybe when I was in the shower. I hadn’t been checking notifications.
With a shaky hand, I lifted my phone and played the message.
“Where the fuck are you, Shiloh?” Curtis said. “Brick told me he had to get a little hands-on the last time you met. But you get us our money, and no one will hurt you. You try to run or hide, it’ll only make things worse.”
Brick’s voice came on the line. “I gave you a fucking love tap compared to what will happen if you don’t pay on time. You better be in the usual spot on Sunday.”
Curtis returned, his voice soothing in contrast. “No one wants to hurt you. Jimmie put you in this position, not us. We’re just dealing with the situation, same as you. Let’s all play nice, and no one will get hurt.”
Click.
I held the phone, staring at it, pulse racing. Had I made a huge mistake by running? Would they find me and hurt me worse? But there was no way they’d track me all the way to Nebraska, right? They didn’t know my connection to Holden.
People could track phones, though, couldn’t they? I wasn’t sure that these guys were sophisticated enough for that, but I didn’t want to find out they’d gotten hold of some app to track “friends” or some shit.
Fuck. What did I do now?
Banshee whimpered and pushed in against me, sensing my panic. I hugged her tight, waiting for my heart to calm.
Holden will know what to do.
I stood on unsteady legs and went down the hall to peek into the bedroom. Banshee followed at my heels, her nails clicking on the hardwood.
Holden was stretched out on the bed, in nothing but his boxer briefs, and damn…the man filled out those briefs and then some.
As freaked as I was, I took a second to mourn the fact Holden would never know the pleasure of someone’s touch instead of the pain he’d suffered as a child. The pleasure of my touch, especially.
He deserved so much better.
I hesitated in the doorway, unsure if I should wake him, but Banshee had no such reservations. She trotted into the room and jumped up on the foot of the bed.
He shifted and opened his eyes.
“Shiloh?” He sat abruptly, alert. “What’s wrong?”
Banshee climbed into his lap the moment he sat up, and Holden wrapped an arm around her. She gazed at me with the most content expression I’ve ever seen on a dog, but then, why wouldn’t she? I wish I had a strong, sexy man to hold me with that kind of casual affection.
“Sorry,” I said. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”
He waved that away. “Tell me why you look so worried.”
I held out my phone. “I got a voicemail.”
“From those assholes?”
I nodded jerkily. “Can they use my phone to track me? What if they show up here? What if they hurt you or your brothers? I have to leave. I think…I don’t know—”
“Whoa, slow down,” Holden said. “Sit down and breathe, Shy.”
I dropped onto the foot of the bed, and Banshee left Holden to nuzzle up to me. She really was a sweet dog. I sank my hand into her fur and felt my rapid pulse slow almost immediately.
I met Holden’s gaze, the vivid blue of his irises like a beacon of light in the darkness. “I don’t want to bring trouble to you or your family.”
“I know,” Holden said seriously. “This isn’t a spy novel. I doubt they can track your phone.”
“Yeah.” I exhaled shakily. “You’re probably right. I’m being silly.”
“No. You’re reasonably worried about some criminals who are threatening you. To be safe, we can get you a new phone. They won’t be able to call and threaten you or track you. How does that sound?”
“Yeah. Good. I could do that.” I took a breath. “They, um, messaged me on the cam site too.”
“You didn’t answer them, did you?”
“No,” I said quickly. “I can block them. I’ve got a lot of control over who can talk to me.”
“Okay, good. Don’t communicate with them at all. It’ll only encourage them to keep harassing you.”
“I won’t.”
“I think it goes without saying that you shouldn’t tell any of your viewers where you are.”
I nodded. “Yeah. I don’t really tell my cam viewers much.”
“I knew the city you lived in,” Holden said. “I even knew which neighborhood and your favorite market where you shopped.”
“Yeah, but you were different. A real friend. I don’t get close to my other viewers that way.”
“Oh.” He cleared his throat. “Well, uh, good. You’re a real friend to me too, but I was never sure how you felt. If I was just another customer or—”
“No. Not for a long time.” I winced. “I’m sorry I kept charging at all, but I was under a lot of pressure.”
“I know, Shy. I didn’t expect free services just because we were friends.”
“If I could have, I’d have happily given them to you,” I murmured.
My gaze dropped to his chest, roaming over his body with more interest now that I’d calmed a little.
Aside from the scripted word Believe inked across his upper chest, he had some tattoos on his forearms. A large lotus flower blooming from what looked like a mud puddle on his right arm, surrounded by other types of flowers, some with sharp-looking thorns.
On his left, fireflies glowed in a dark sky.
On his inner wrist, an infinity loop with the words Bro and Code was legible.
But my greedy gaze was much more interested in the trail of dark hair leading into those boxer briefs.
Holden cleared his throat, and I jerked my gaze up. “Sorry, what?”
His lips quirked. “You’re making me feel kind of naked. Maybe I should get dressed, and then we can deal with your phone?”
I wasn’t shy by any means. I was a camboy, for fuck’s sake. But getting caught out drooling over Holden’s body, when we both knew our relationship couldn’t become physical, sent a wave of shame through me.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
“You didn’t, not really.” Holden shifted a little, and I noticed his cock was half-hard. Oh. Yeah. He did still have a very strong sex drive. “I’m just not used to anyone looking at me like that.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Really? Well, maybe you should walk around in your underwear more often, then.”
He laughed. “Or maybe not.”
I stood up to leave. “This still doesn’t guarantee they won’t find me,” I said quietly. “Your brothers…”
“It’s a small risk, but I’ll make sure they’re aware of what’s going on, if you’re comfortable with that. I had to tell them a little already, to explain your bruising.”
I lifted my hand to my jaw, caressing the tender flesh. I’d almost forgotten about that. “It’s only fair they know what you’re bringing into their house.”
“Okay, then. I’ll tell them and their boyfriends. Dalton is a sheriff. If those creeps do come for you, you won’t be alone, Shiloh. My brothers know how to fight,” he said dryly. “Sometimes too well. And if it comes to it, Dalton can throw those assholes in a jail cell.”
“He can’t arrest them until after they hurt someone, though…”
“Oh, he can. He wouldn’t arrest them for nothing, but there are other charges. Stalking, maybe? Hell, I don’t care. We’ll get them for trespassing. The law is on our side, okay? This isn’t a big city like St. Louis. Dalton is one of us, and we take care of our own.”
I nodded, my chest loosening. “Okay. Yeah. I, uh, need to message a couple of my friends that I’m okay before we get rid of my phone.”
“All right. I’ll get dressed while you do that.”
I let my gaze slide over Holden once more, a little more boldly this time, and winked at him. “It’s a shame more people can’t appreciate this view.”
Red spread across his chest and climbed up his throat. Damn, but I’d love to trace it with my lips, my tongue.
Down, boy. He’s not yours to touch.
“Just so you know,” I murmured, “that blush only makes you hotter.”
“What? I’m not—” He huffed a breath. “I don’t blush.”
I laughed as I went out the door, Banshee on my heels.
Holden hadn’t really told me anything I didn’t know. But he’d listened, took my fears seriously, and suggested a small measure of safety.
It was amazing just how much it reassured me to know I wasn’t alone in this anymore.
I texted Sheila and Nate.
Went out of town. Getting a new phone, so don’t worry if you don’t hear from me for a while. I’m safe.
For the first time in a long time, it actually felt true.