Chapter 49
Why are you talking to me?
Four days. It had been four whole days, and the tie between the Admiral Ven and the main hub hadn’t been broken.
I was hardly the only person working on this issue, but this was all I had to do.
I couldn’t speak to anyone or do anything else, so I was throwing myself at the problem.
It was an unmovable wall so far, and I feared I wouldn’t succeed, even though there was no choice but success.
During this time, I refused to think about Monqilcolnen or the clawing pit in my stomach.
No one was talking to me. I was alone.
The sole conversations I’d had were sparingly with Edith and the one with Jemtonkilsol and Dilvonsil.
That was it. I hadn’t had this much silence since I was a child.
I’d even had more interaction in the academy, and I’d been horribly lonely there.
Not that I was lonely right now. I couldn’t be lonely.
I didn’t have that luxury. I was too busy to be anything.
I was currently sitting in one of the cargo bays.
I couldn’t take the pitying looks as I tried and failed to fix this.
I almost retreated to the tunnels, but I had to clear every move with Qinlin, and she hadn’t seen the point of the tunnels, even when I had asked in the past. Thankfully, she’d seen the merit of a change in scenery and allowed the cargo bay for that and privacy.
My wings were out, and I’d unbraided my hair.
I leaned over my screen, trying to figure out different ways to disconnect the link.
No matter what I tried, nothing changed.
I was breaking myself to fix this, and nothing was working.
How much more could I do? I had to fix this, and separating the tie was the first step.
The door slid open, and I swallowed a groan. Right now, the only person I wanted to see was Monqilcolnen; even Seth, Urgg, and Edith were unwelcome. Someone peered around a metal bin, and I didn’t bother to contain my snarl.
Vorjyn raised a dark blue eyebrow. “Am I interrupting?”
“Yes. Now leave,” I snapped.
He snorted and came to sit beside me, crossing his long legs. “At least you're honest.”
“Why are you sitting?” I glared at him. “I’m not supposed to be talking to anyone, and I have no desire to get in trouble for talking to the likes of you.”
“Ach.” He covered his soul. “You wound me. I’m bleeding most profusely from the barbs. I will never recover.”
I growled and focused on my screen, determined to ignore him.
“Not even concerned if I’ve been fucking Monqilcolnen in your absence?”
My hands curled into fists, shaking from the tension on my muscles. A snarl built in my chest. I wanted to launch on top of him and beat him senseless. Instead, I took a deep breath. “No. Monqilcolnen wouldn’t fuck anyone else. He promised.”
“You trust him that much?”
I glanced at him. “I trust Monqilcolnen with everything.”
He held my gaze for several long moments. “Pity I couldn’t taunt you into something fun, but I guess it’s good you trust him, because he misses you.”
Ice stabbed my soul, making me shiver. I allowed myself one moment to close my eyes and let the need to see Monqilcolnen fill me before I put it away. “I miss him as well.”
Silence prevailed. Even though I hated Vorjyn, his lack of talking grated on me. The pit in my gut churned and bubbled. After a moment, he commented, “You are a lot smarter than I thought.”
“Excuse me?”
“This.” He waved a hand. “It’s all over the ship. Not the particulars, mind you, but Monqilcolnen shared some with me. You’re quite intelligent and gifted to be able to make this. Shocking, really.”
“Yes,” I remarked with a humorless laugh. “I’m sure I will be remembered as intelligent when I destroy NAID.”
“Well, in addition to being a traitor and foolish, as well as a lousy drunk.”
I just stared at him. “Leave me alone.”
“No.”
“Why not?” I snapped. “What is this, Vorjyn? What do you want?”
He returned my look without even bothering to look upset. “Because Monqilcolnen is worried, but he cannot defy orders. I can. No one orders me to do anything.”
My mouth fell open.
“It’s not some great plot,” Vorjyn said with a chuckle.
“No one gives a shit about me besides my rather horrible parents, so it doesn’t matter if I defy orders.
Also, fuck the Drakcol Empire. It can burn for all I care.
Though Monqilcolnen cares. The fool. So in his stead, I can make sure you’re safe.
I owe him that much, even if you are rather annoying. ”
“Me? Annoying?” I snapped. “You are far more annoying.”
“Am I?”
“Yes.”
“I’m a delight. You should be honored I’m even exerting myself.”
“You are rubbish that didn’t get spaced.”
Vorjyn chuckled. “I would much rather be spaced then here.”
“Would you leave?”
“No. I am persistent, so accept I’ll be checking on you until all of this is fixed and Monqilcolnen is returned to your side. I don’t like it any more than you. You are stupidly boring.” Vorjyn leaned back against the wall, crossed his arms, and closed his eyes.
“I could focus better if you weren’t here,” I remarked.
“Not my problem.”
Before I could make another comment, the door opened again, and I hissed. I was supposed to be alone here. What was with all of these people?
“NAID said he was here, Noxy. We have to find him,” Camden said.
“Why?” Noxlyn asked in a monotone voice.
“Because he has to be upset.”
I hit my head against my raised knees. Was I loathing silence? How was that possible?
“Oh, hello,” Camden called when he rounded the container. “Who’s this?”
“Vorjyn, meet Camden. Camden, this is Vorjyn, a friend of Monqilcolnen,” I answered, not even asking what he and Noxlyn were doing here.
“Hi,” Camden said with a wave, plopping down on the ground without invitation. Noxlyn followed him at a slower rate. “You have an unfortunate name, but a friend of Monty’s is a friend of mine.”
Vorjyn lifted an eyebrow. “Monty?”
“Us humans call him that,” Camden replied.
“Why is my name unfortunate? I’m quite fond of it.”
“Well. Virgin and all that.”
Both me and Vorjyn stared at him. That was Vorjyn’s name. I had no idea what Camden was getting at.
“Lost in translation clearly. Anyway.” Camden patted Noxlyn’s arm. “This is Noxlyn.”
They greeted each other with flicks of their tails.
“How did you meet Monty?” Camden demanded.
I closed my eyes. If they started talking about Monqilcolnen, I would never be able to concentrate. I missed him too much. On a normal basis, I wanted to know everything about him, but right now, I craved even the smallest morsel of information about him. I begged, “Can you all please leave?”
“We’re here checking on you,” Camden said, and Noxlyn just stared at me.
“Which I appreciate, but I need to work,” I replied.
“Apparently, listening to stories about Monqilcolnen distracts him,” Vorjyn remarked. “He’s boring like that.”
I glared at him.
But Camden chuckled. “I can imagine that. He’s obsessed, but so’s Monty.”
“Disgusting. And boring.” Vorjyn leaned his head back. “I miss killing people.”
Camden choked.
Noxlyn glanced between them, almost assessing. Only a moment later, he took out his screen and started to make notes.
I covered my face. This was hopeless. To think I was missing this.
Though that wasn’t strictly true. I was missing Monqilcolnen.
I wanted to see him. It was becoming an ache, although it hadn’t strictly been that much time.
And… I missed people. I missed being a part of things. I hated this clawing emptiness.
“Well, since you’re alive, I’ll let you be,” Camden said, starting to stand.
Noxlyn followed, claws clacking away. “If he had been dead, would you have bothered his corpse? Prodding it and such? Is that a human custom?”
Camden burst into laughter, threading his arm through Noxlyn’s, and said, “I think I’ll have to explain that in greater detail. Come on.”
I ignored them as they left and tried to focus on the issue at hand.
Vorjyn stood. “What do you want me to tell Monqilcolnen?”
My teeth sank into my lip. I wanted to tell Monqilcolnen to come get me, but I swallowed the words. “Tell him I’m well and working hard.”
He snorted and left without a word.
The instant the door closed, the gnawing pit in my stomach swelled and I hugged my knees to my chest.
“Well. Is he okay?” I demanded, pacing the length of my office. Cincin had abandoned me long ago but continued to glare at me from her tree.
Vorjyn lounged on the couch in my office, picking at his claws. “That’s what he says. It’s a lie. He looks horrible. I have seen dead bodies with more life than Wyn had.”
I growled in warning, and he stared at me, nonplussed.
“Even that human Camden had been planning on prodding Wyn and whatnot, though I think he needed to be dead first for the human ritual. Wyn basically looked dead, and he has the same personality as a corpse, so it’s probably the same thing.”
A snarl built in my throat, but once again, Vorjyn ignored me.
Wyn. His name never left my thoughts no matter what I was doing.
The damage to NAID was minimal as of yet.
The computer was merely slow. No sign of the kill code had been found on any other ship or within the main hub of NAID.
As a precaution, every ship and station had severed their links with the main hub to prevent widespread catastrophes.
But so far, nothing had happened.
I hated that Wyn and I were separated when what we all feared wasn’t so terrible, at least not yet.
I couldn’t understand Talvax’s reasoning.
I’d respected Wyn’s wishes and kept from speaking to her, but it was getting harder with every day that passed.
My instincts thrummed that I needed to find my mate and keep him wrapped within my embrace, never letting him go again.
“So he’s not well?” I demanded, my tail whipping and a growl rumbling in my chest.
“This may shock you, but I don’t know him, so I’m only guessing. Wyn doesn’t look well, but he said he is. That’s all I have to offer.” Vorjyn continued drinking his graugg, unbothered.
I didn’t have the luxury of being calm. I was attempting to find my mask, but it refused to form.
I missed Wyn too fiercely. I was too concerned about him.
My parents had pinged me every day, and I’d ignored them.
Urgg, Seth, and Bartholomew had all reached out; they were rebuffed as well.
Kalvoxrencol and Serlotminden had tried to comfort me, and I’d shoved them away.
Even Hallonnixmin and Dontilvynsan had reached out, and I’d refused to speak with them.
None of them could fix what was wrong. But the problem was: neither could I.
Hopefully, someone, anyone would solve the problem Wyn had created so the two of us could be side by side again.
From reading the reports, I was beginning to see how intelligent Wyn was and how challenging breaking this virus he’d made was going to be.
It was adaptive and invasive. It was slowly corrupting and spreading throughout every system.
It might not be causing issues now, but it was a matter of time.
I faced Vorjyn. “What do I do?”
“How would I know? This, whatever you and Wyn are, isn’t something I do or understand. Ask me how to murder someone, and I will be very helpful.”
I scrubbed a hand down my face. I felt utterly helpless, and I hated that feeling.
I pushed on my inner fire, trying to prompt it into doing something, showing me something that would assist my mate.
Nothing happened. I had no sudden flash of insight.
I was helpless and couldn’t even soothe Wyn.
He’d been taken from me. I’d never hated Talvax before, but I did now, even though she was suffering as well.
Talvax was facing the wrath of the Cohort and Council of Seekers alike.
Not only that, she was separated from Urgg.
It might have been by her own decision, but she was suffering by being away from her mate.
She was reading every report, as well as her duties, and she was fighting against the virus, even though she wasn’t the best engineer.
However, I still hated her, and I hated that I hated her. This whole situation was horrible. All I wanted was for it to end.
“I need him,” I confessed, revealing more than I usually felt comfortable to do.
“That’s rather obvious.” Vorjyn continued to drink, watching me pace.
“But he doesn’t want me to use my position.”
Vorjyn finally moved. “Shockingly, I’m with Wyn in that regard.”
I faced him, eyebrows raised and mouth hanging open.
“I agree. It’s weird. I dislike it.” He stood in front of me. “Wyn must stand on his own feet if he is to measure up to you.”
“He’s already my equal. He’s better than me.”
“A romantic notion, to be sure, but society will not care.”
I closed my eyes.
“Let him do this. He made it. He can destroy it. Let people marvel at how amazing he is and all that nonsense. Yes, he will suffer. Yes, you will suffer. But once you are together, you’ll be stronger. And more importantly, you’ll have honored his wishes and proven you’re to be trusted.”
He was right, but I didn’t want to listen. However, I would, as much as it pained me.