Chapter 59 #2
I heard the tink of another scale landing on the table, and I swallowed my surging bile. This was for my mate. I would prove to him how much I loved him. Monqilcolnen would have no doubts. I would spend the rest of my life taking care of him, treasuring him, loving him.
Monqilcolnen was my mate; he was my sole reason.
Another tink sounded, and I took a heaving breath.
“Let me clean you up. Make sure to clean and oil your skin. Hopefully the scales will regrow, but I’m not sure they will,” she said.
“I know.”
“Do not let Monqilcolnen bathe the injury.”
I did not respond to that. If he wanted to, I wasn’t going to deny him, that was for certain. Besides, as my mate, it was his right.
Qinlin snorted, and I was fairly certain she knew exactly what my thoughts were.
She cleaned the scales and handed them to me. “There. Your barbaric tradition continued.”
“I think it’s romantic,” I said with a slight smile. “Thank you, Doctor Qinlin.”
She didn’t acknowledge me more than a flick of her tail as she strode toward her office.
I hopped off the bed and went to the dispenser on the wall.
It was still alive. It didn’t take long for me to find the bracer from our experience.
I chose a gold metal and placed my scales in the tray.
In less than a breath, the bracer was in the dispenser.
When we arrived home, or somewhere where there was a metalsmith, I would have another bracer made and have my scales inset into it. But for now, this was perfect.
I checked the lift, but it was still not working, so I entered the tunnels to begin the long journey back to me and mine’s quarters.
My eyes opened, and my hand instantly reached for Wyn, needing to feel him. I blinked, stretching further. Nothing. I snapped upright. The bed was empty. I looked around. Our bedroom was empty.
Where was my mate?
Growling, I prowled toward the bathroom. It was empty as well. Where was Wyn? My soul sped and panic pulse under my skin. Where was my mate? If something had happened to him… I couldn’t even finish that thought. Wyn was the only thing holding me together.
I strode out of our bedroom, not even bothering with clothes.
“Holy fuck,” Seth snapped, cheeks red, before he turned around. My cousins both peppered me with questions I didn’t bother to listen to. Bartholomew simply stared at me, completely unnerved, until Seth covered his eyes, making him snort.
None of them were who I sought.
“Where is Wyn?” I snarled.
“He needed to leave for a moment,” Seth said, not turning around.
I growled, looking at the door.
Serlotminden jumped in front of me and said, “Clothes, Monqilcolnen. You need clothes, and we don’t even know where Wyn is.”
I shoved him out of the way. I couldn’t care less about clothes. I needed my mate right now.
Kalvoxrencol took his place. “Please just wait. Wyn will be back. Seth, try to ping him.”
Seth fumbled for his touchstone, but it was dark. NAID wasn’t operating the comm system currently.
I pushed Kalvoxrencol and Serlotminden out of the way, but they fought me, prodding me back toward the bedroom.
Snarling, I attacked them, but they fought back, attempting to contain me.
Before we could truly fight, the door slid open, and Wyn was on the other side.
I raced toward him and scooped him into my arms. I kissed him and Wyn groaned, his tongue invading my mouth.
I picked him up, and his legs wrapped around my waist.
Without releasing his mouth, I walked back to our bedroom, where he was safe.
I crashed onto the bed. Wyn moaned, arching under me.
His desire for me became evident rather quickly beneath me as he writhed and wiggled.
But I was not in the right frame of mind for any sort of intimacy.
Instead, I cupped his cheeks and pressed him into the bed, holding him in place so he couldn’t escape me.
Cincin jumped onto the pillow, also glaring at Wyn, like she equally blamed him for leaving.
“Where did you go?” I demanded. “You left me.”
Wyn slid his slim fingers over my sides, easily teasing the scent glands there.
I growled in response. The distraction didn’t deter me in the slightest from my mate or his absence when I awoke.
I couldn’t have that happen again. I needed him.
I needed him here all the time. Safe. If he vanished on me, I would soon follow.
There was nothing in this universe without Wyn beside me.
“Wyn,” I said, trying to keep my voice even, but I didn’t succeed. I’d been rather demanding and needy of late; it was a wonder he hadn’t fled from my presence sooner.
He continued to stroke my sides and said, “I needed to visit Qinlin.”
My soul halted in my chest. I rolled off Wyn and immediately began inspecting him from head to toe. Where was he injured? Or was he ill? I tugged on his shirt to rid him of his clothes; I had to see all of him to make certain that all was well.
With a gentle touch on my hand, Wyn stalled my frantic motions. My eyes shot to his face, and he smiled. “I am perfectly fine, Star.”
“Then why did you go to the med bay?”
“I needed to do something.”
Irritation flared. “What could you possibly need, and why didn’t you wake me beforehand?”
“I do not have to tell you where I am going, Monqilcolnen,” he shot back.
I sat up. “You do not, but I nee—” I forced myself to swallow the words. I was shattering more with every second and Wyn was off doing trivial tasks as if my world was not collapsing around my feet.
“You need to eat,” he said.
A growl swelled in my gut. “I’m fine.”
“No, you are not.”
“Well, if I’m not, then why did you think it was fine to leave me alone?”
“You are being ridiculous, Monqilcolnen. Your cousins are right outside. They haven’t left the shared space the entire time.”
“They are not you!” I snarled.
“No, they are not,” Wyn replied. “But you were not alone. I had something I needed to do, and now, I’m back. So you need to eat.”
I crossed my arms. I wasn’t hungry. No, I was angry, sad, tired, and I couldn’t even name the aching throb residing in my gut. It yanked and pulled and twisted in the most painful of ways, bringing tears to my eyes and making it near impossible for me to breathe.
“Eat,” Wyn demanded, holding some bread that he had taken from the dispenser.
I knocked it away. “I do not want or need it.” I flopped back onto the bed. “I am going to sleep. You can do as you like.”
I hoped he would curl around me. I wanted to feel his wings covering me, protecting me, but I couldn’t find the words.
A rough hand yanked on my shoulder, making me lie flat on my back. A scowling Wyn leaned over me, his braid falling over his shoulder, nearly smacking me in the face.
He grabbed my chin in a painful grip. “You will eat,” he said, snarling.
“No.”
“So help me, Monqilcolnen, I will force food down your throat.”
I growled back, but Wyn did not release me or even loosen his grip.
“You will listen to me, Star. You can grieve for as long as you need. What happened was unfair and it is painful. I understand it has only been a few days, but you are pulling away from me. I can feel it; I can see it; I cannot allow it. You will not wither. Do you understand me?”
I tried to shake my head, but his grasp did not allow it.
“There is no other answer but yes,” he snapped. “Do you understand me, Monqilcolnen?”
Even as much as I loved Wyn, he couldn’t stem the tide of sadness and grief in me. It had burrowed into the marrow of my bones, and I feared it would be the death of me. One day it would take me from him; I was thankful that it wouldn’t be the end of his life too.
Wyn pressed his lips to mine in a fierce kiss. When he pulled back, his eyes were glassy with emotion. “You are mine.”
Was I?
His mouth claimed me again. “You belong to me, and I will not surrender you to anyone or anything. Not to another person. Not to your cousins. Not to your parents. Not to your grief. Not to death. Not to anything. You are mine and mine alone. Do you understand?”
My breath came in short bursts. Was he saying what I thought he was saying?
Wyn slipped something cold onto my arm, but I was unwilling to look away from the burning in his light blue eyes. He nipped at my bottom lip hard enough to draw blood, and I grunted from the sharp sting. He lapped at the blood, adding a richness to his claiming kiss.
I groaned. Never had blood been a desire for me, but tasting my own on Wyn’s tongue was more erotic than I’d ever thought possible.
I moaned, twining my tongue with his and relinquishing all control to him.
Wyn fucked into my mouth, claiming, controlling, and taking what he wanted; I gave it all to him and more.
He could have everything. My life, my breath, my very soul—all of it was his. I would keep nothing from him.
Against my lips, Wyn said, “You are my mate, Star, and I refuse to live without you.”
Something joyous and fiery ignited in my chest and sent tears coursing down my cheeks.
I had never thought this was possible. I had hoped for this moment once I had started to get to know Wyn better, but I had never truly thought I would receive his care or become his mate. It seemed too unfathomable.
“You are mine,” I sobbed, unable to stop the tears. “You are my mate as well.”
Wyn finally loosened his harsh grip on my chin to hold my cheek, brushing the pad of his thumb over my scales. “You are not just saying that to appease me, right?”
“No, Peace. You are mine. I have known for some time.”
He smiled and continued to stroke me so softly. “I won’t let you go, so I need you to fight for me, for us. We are worth living for, Monqilcolnen. Our future is worth living for.”