31. Matthias
31
MATTHIAS
THE NIGHT OF THE REQUEST
There’s so much waiting on me. Countless reports that need my signature. Two complicated cases that need my insight. A date at court tomorrow for one of my highest-profile clients.
It’s not just the pressure from Lawson and Buckingham. There’s also what’s on my roster from my other job. The career path I never would’ve chosen for myself, but find myself walking nonetheless.
Neither job is enough to distract me from thinking about Wy though. Nothing is.
It’s been just over a year since Wyatt walked out of my life. Again. And once again, it’s done nothing to lessen my preoccupation with him.
Just like the first time, it’d been my fault. If I’d made it clear to the rest of The Firm that Wyatt’s position was untouchable, he never would’ve been fired.
My fault. I already knew he hated me for purchasing the law practice in the first place. Well, he believed it was my family. He didn’t know the funds came from my account alone.
Just as I hadn’t known that taking up the partner role in his department would oust him from the position he’d been building toward. I’d done so in the hope of spending more time with him.
Instead, it drove a bigger wedge between us.
For the past year, I’ve had to watch him struggle from afar, knowing he was going through the most traumatic events of his life without me by his side. When Jen walked out on him, I almost asked Cade to kill her for me.
I should’ve been delighted he was single, but instead, I was furious. How dare she leave Wyatt when he needed her most?
I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve almost knocked on his door. I know where he lives. I’ve always known.
Stalking Wyatt from the shadows takes up so much time it could be counted as my third occupation.
But I know now more than ever, that Wyatt won’t accept my help. That hasn’t stopped me from interfering in small ways. Ones I knew he’d never notice. I’ve bribed his landlord to ensure that Wyatt is never evicted from the shithole he and Jackson call home, regardless of how far behind on rent they fall. I’ve even had his piece-of-shit car towed in the dead of night and repaired before being replaced by dawn.
A job offer awaits Wyatt at any law firm he chooses to apply to, including mine.
But his CV never comes in.
I’m watching him waste away from afar, and I have no clue how to stop it. The man I love is literally starving, and there’s nothing I can do.
He won’t accept my help. The bad blood between us runs too deep.
On his side, at least.
I don’t blame him for it. If I were in his shoes, I’d feel the same. And Wyatt is far too stubborn and proud to accept help.
Especially from me.
He’s also not in the right place to hear the truth of what happened all those years ago. The moment Father died, I wanted to go to Wyatt, to tell him everything and beg him to let me back into his life.
But he’d moved on and grown into a version of himself I didn’t know.
A version that hated my fucking guts.
I’m at the end of my tether though. I watched from behind my car’s tinted windows this morning as a piece of gum almost sent him over the edge. Gum.
His frustration has me wanting to barrel over there and wrap my arms around him. To beg him to let me take care of him. To make all his problems disappear.
But he wouldn’t like that. Wyatt hates me almost as much as I love him.
It’s fucking killing me though, especially with all the resources I have at my fingertips. What good is all this power if I can’t use it to make the person I love happy?
There’s a rap at my door and Cade’s head appears. “Got something from The Firm for you.”
“Not interested.”
I received the notification that someone had left a request, just as I know all my brothers did. This system is much better than the one we had in place before technology caught up. Going night after night to that musty church to check was something we, thankfully, didn’t need to do any longer. Not having to deal with the cobwebs and creepy sounds emanating from the graveyard was a plus. “You’re on the schedule tonight. It’s your problem.”
Cade slides a folded piece of paper in front of me. “Actually, I think this one is very much your problem.”
I sigh, knowing he won’t leave until I look. Ice fills my veins as I unfold the paper, as my gaze frantically skims over the note before flying up to my brother. “What is this?”
“You know what it is, Matty.”
I shake my head in disbelief. “No, it can’t be from him. He wouldn’t go to The Firm.”
Cade shrugs. “That request suggests he would.”
I finger the edges of the paper, my heart cracking in my chest. Wyatt. How desperate must he be feeling? He’s made no secret of his disdain for The Firm over the years. The fact that he’s gone to them…
I don’t like it. My poor Wy. Even though I know nothing bad will come of this, he doesn’t. He must be so stressed.
“Well?” Cade says. “It’s from your man.”
“I don’t have a man.”
The lie is automatic. Cade knows as well as all the others that it’s bullshit. And, like the others, he has no issue calling me on it. “Fine. I’ll deal with it then.”
“No!” I say hurriedly, snatching the paper. “I mean, no. I can sort it.”
Cade smirks knowingly. “This is your chance.”
“What do you mean?”
“To get back in with him,” Cade says. “Come on, Matty. We all know that you’re in love with the guy. This is your shot.”
“You’re right.” My mind is already racing with possibilities. Wyatt’s asked for a lot, but it’s not enough. That figure won’t cover everything he and Jackson need. “I can fix so much for him.”
“You can.” Cade taps my head until I look up at him across the desk. “But, come on, Matthias. Think of yourself for once.”
“What?”
Cade huffs. “This is your chance to get back into his life. Don’t throw it away. Remind him of what you once shared.”
I haven’t ever told the others of everything that went down between Wyatt and me, but they’re all shockingly intelligent. Even Harley, for all his fucking about. They all know who Wyatt is to me, what he means.
And they know the lengths that Father went to keep us apart. Cade heard far more that fateful morning than I’d ever intended. “I couldn’t betray his trust like that. He’d hate me.”
“He already hates you,” Cade says. “And he sure as fuck doesn’t trust you.”
I stay silent, staring down at the paper. Am I really considering this? Oh fuck. Oh fuck. I am.
“Just think about it,” Cade nods. “You’ve got nothing to lose and everything to gain.”
He’s wrong though. I could get Wyatt back, but if he learned the truth about it, I’d lose him all over again.
Forever this time.
Somehow though, I don’t think it’ll be enough to stop me.
I’ve spent so long being selfless where Wyatt is concerned.
I think…I think it’s time I learned to be selfish. One thing The Firm has taught me is I’m not a good man. I’m capable of doing things others would consider depraved. Evil.
I take unspeakable risks on a daily basis.
Maybe it’s time I take a risk on my heart instead.