15. Haley
15
HALEY
E li changed me.
I was a changed woman.
I didn’t mean that only in the sense that his kiss surprised me. It had.
I didn’t mean that merely in the fact that he was really good at it. He was.
It was safe to assume that kissing my bully had altered my brain chemistry.
Every chance we had, we’d sneak somewhere private and do it all over again.
In the library. Outside under a tree on the campus square. At the lobby of his dorm. And even in the women’s bathroom when he followed me in there and locked it so no one could come in.
It was like we’d unleashed years’ worth of desire neither of us were ready to acknowledge. It just built and waited, growing and growing. His apology was only the beginning of setting me on the path to forgive him, but I’d be a liar if I said I hadn’t noticed him all along.
Nat: Having a crush on a bully isn’t the weirdest thing I’ve heard of.
I winced, waiting for Finn to drop Eli off at my house. Aunt Cindy was at work, picking up a little shift at the daycare where she used to work full-time. But I didn’t intend to be alone tonight.
Texting my sister took off the edge of waiting. I didn’t want to literally stand at the front door and watch out the window for him.
Haley: But?
Nat: But nothing. It makes sense. Enemies to lovers. Those are my favorite movies.
I wasn’t looking for validation from her, but I appreciated having her as someone to talk to. Davina didn’t seem sure about my hooking up with Eli. She was skeptical, having witnessed him bullying and teasing me for so long. Yet, she didn’t try to talk me out of whatever I wanted to do with him. Making out, copping a feel, and…
Maybe more.
In the last week and a half that we’d proven to each other that we couldn’t keep our eyes or hands off each other, I wasn’t sure what to call him.
Haley: I guess enemies to lovers would fit.
Haley: Not that we are lovers. I haven’t done that yet.
Nat: Make sure you want to give your V-card to him.
Nat: Don’t end up like me, either. I love Grayson, but I didn’t enjoy getting knocked up the night I lost my virginity.
Haley: I know.
Haley: And I’m not ready to take that step.
Haley: He’s just my bully with benefits?
Haley: I’m being careful.
Knocks sounded on the front door, and I whirled around to open it.
“H—”
Eli didn’t let me finish saying hello. He strode in, wrapped his arms around me, and kissed me hard.
Oh, yeah.
I kissed him back, framing his face as he kicked the door closed behind him.
I’m being really careful.
He picked me up, deepening the kiss, and I cinched my legs around his waist.
Really, really careful not to get addicted to this.
That heat, the thrill, the passion. All of it consumed me, just like every time he touched me or kissed me, and I never wanted it to stop.
“Fuck, Haley.” He rested his brow against mine as he carried me further into the house. “I missed you.”
I smiled, kissing him again. “Since three hours ago?”
“Longest three hours of my life,” he groaned. “The whole time I had to stand there and pretend to listen to them, I kept thinking about you.” He kissed me hard. “This.”
He walked me back to my room, clearly very happy and content now. His parents had demanded that he talk to them about his grades—a mandated routine that he loathed.
But now that he was done, nothing could stop us from being together while the house was ours.
In my room, I reached back to lock my door behind me, just in case Aunt Cindy came home early. He didn’t drop me once, didn’t let go of me at all. In his arms, I was secure and safe. Even when he lowered me to my bed, he came down with me, hovering over me and pressing the bulk of his body weight over me.
“You’ve got no idea how much I couldn’t wait to get out of there and come here,” he said between kisses as he slipped his hand under my shirt. “All the dirty things I want to—” He stopped, narrowing his eyes at me as his fingertips touched the bottom swells of my breasts. “Are you wearing a bra?”
“No. And in about three seconds, I don’t want to be wearing this cami, either.”
He didn’t disappoint, peeling it off me. “Haley. Fuck . You’re gorgeous.” With one hand on each breast, he cupped the heavy weight of them and rolled his thumbs over my nipples.
Arching my back to encourage him to keep playing with them, so sensitive to his touch, I closed my eyes and moaned.
“You have the most perfect tits,” he praised, bringing his face down to them. Pushing them together, he dragged his tongue over my cleavage before turning to suck on my right one.
He’d felt me up before, but this was the first time we’d had the privacy to take our clothes off.
“They’re too big,” I argued.
He groaned, sucking on my left nipple harder, causing me to gasp out in pain. Like always, he pushed me to pain, but the endorphin rush that followed the sting felt so damn good.
“They’re perfect,” he repeated, going from one to the other, licking, sucking, and biting. Driving me wild, he took his time to feast on every inch of my skin that he could.
“Too big,” I repeated.
He leaned up, his lips wet, and stared at me. “Is that why you try to hide?”
I swallowed, hating that he’d get it.
“Is that why you cover up and wear baggy clothes?” He leaned down to kiss me as he slid his hand down to my pants.
I nodded. “Yeah.” Lifting my hips, I gave him the clearance to ease my sweatpants and panties off. The allure of having him touch me where I ached and throbbed was too much to resist. “I didn’t want anyone to think I was easy. Or like my mom.”
He shook his head. “You couldn’t be anyone but you.” He tugged my pants all the way off, and the enormity of this moment sank in.
It scared me.
It intimidated me.
I’d never done anything with a guy before. Eli was my first in everything so far, and that implied so much trust in him. Trust I couldn’t give this easily.
“You, Haley,” he said as he traced his fingers over toward my pussy, “are not like your mom.”
“Because I’m a virgin?” I joked, groaning at the swipe of his fingers over my entrance.
“Because you’re not easy or manipulative.” He rubbed harder, keeping me in the moment and focused on him as he fingered me.
“Because you’re kind and giving.” He lowered to kiss me as he moved faster, playing with me and pushing me closer to coming. We’d fooled around and teased each other, but he had yet to make me come.
“Because you’re mine, Haley. No one else’s. And I want to see every inch of you. Never hide from me.” He lowered over me, pausing to suck on my nipple and cup my other breast with a forceful grip. “Never.”
“Oh!” I breathed harder, welcoming that sweet tension pulling every fiber of my being taut.
“You drive me crazy,” he growled. “When you’re stubborn and so smart. Always right.” He kissed lower yet, all the way until he urged me to part my legs from a nudge of his shoulders.
“When you’re sassy and scared?—”
“I’m not scared—ah!” I arched my back as he quickly pressed his lips to my clit, sucking hard with an openmouthed kiss where I was so sensitive with the urgency to come.
“When you’re sweet and compassionate,” he added before licking my cunt in long, hot swipes of his tongue.
“That’s who you are,” he growled.
His. I wouldn’t argue with him on that claim. Right now, with him feasting on my pussy, I felt like I belonged to him. Like I fit with him. He cupped my ass, holding me in place as he devoured my sopping wet cunt. No amount of squirming would get me away from the ever-increasing buildup of tension and pressure. Only when I pushed up toward him, instinctively letting my body guide me. Humping his face made him growl and hum his encouragement louder. I was almost there, so close and struggling to just let go and trust him if I fell.
And he knew it. He could tell. With a harder suction on my clit, he let me have that bite of pain I’d come to enjoy with him.
Before I could resist the need to come, caving and surrendering to his mouth on me like this, I cried out as I came.
Waves of relief had me shaking. I trembled, trying to catch my breath. And he was there. Grounding me. Hugging me. Holding me. He crawled up the bed to spoon me, and as I closed my eyes and relished the warm press of his lips on the back of my neck, I understood what he meant.
I was his.
He did have me like this.
And it was the euphoria that I never could have imagined being this bold and bright, this sweet and sensual as this.
For a long while, he lay with me and comforted me from the aftershocks of coming for the first time. Not the first time, since I experimented with toys and pleasuring myself, but that didn’t compare.
At all.
“So that’s what the fuss is about,” I joked quietly. The gentle caresses of his hand up and down my arm soothed me almost to falling asleep in his arms.
He chuckled, hugging me tighter before leaning up on one elbow to peer down at me. “Thanks.”
I looked up at him, stroking my hand over his face. Seeing him so unguarded and not trying to act cool was still such a marvel that I wanted to stare at his face and memorize every detail. “Thanks?”
“For letting me have the honor of being your first.” He grinned, so cocky about it.
I pulled his head down to kiss him, tasting a lingering bit of my essence on his tongue. Before we could get too heated for more, he reared back and smiled at me. “What’s that?” Tipping his head toward my closet, he prompted me to follow his line of sight.
I turned, glancing at the gown that hung from a hanger. It was hooked over the top of the closet door, the silver shimmering a little under the light overhead. The rotation of the ceiling fan blades gave the light a little play, emphasizing the sparkle of the embellishments on my sister’s dress.
“A hand-me-down.”
He traced feather-light circles on my shoulder, and I shivered, loving that soft touch. “I thought you weren’t going to the dance,” he said as he tugged my blanket up to cover us.
A bully to a sweetheart. From teasing me to wanting me covered with a blanket. He’d pulled a hell of a one-eighty that I couldn’t fully trust. Even after how he’d made me come.
“I’m not. Davina is still debating whether she wants to solo. She didn’t want to buy a dress, and I said I had that one.”
“Go with me.”
I looked away from Natasha’s hand-me-down and peered at him, thinking he was joking. “What?” I couldn’t help but laugh a couple of times.
“Go to the dance with me.”
I furrowed my brow. “Is that a question or a command?”
“Yes.”
I rolled my eyes. “You would want to take me to that dumb dance?”
He kissed me. “You’re the only one I’d want to take.”
“Because we’re… dating?” I felt silly to ask.
“We’re doing whatever we want,” he replied smugly before he kissed me again.
“You would want to be seen at the dance with me?” I asked. We’d been keeping the PDA to a minimum because I didn’t want anyone to see me with him and tease me. A little part of me was still worried that this was all an elaborate prank. No matter how real it felt when we were together, I couldn’t dismiss that he’d been my bully for so long.
I wanted to believe he was capable of change, but it was a big change that happened so suddenly.
“I don’t care who would see us there. I only care that I’d be there with you.” He shrugged one shoulder. “I didn’t plan to go either. If you don’t go, I won’t.”
Way to put pressure on me.
He kissed me again, clutching my hip to encourage me to roll over and face him.
“We don’t have to,” he said, gazing down at me.
“Okay. We’ll go.”
He raised his brows. “That was fast.”
“Why not?” I worried that it was just lust motivating me, but it wasn’t that big of a deal. It was just one night. A dance and nothing more. After all, I had a dress already. “I’ll be graduating soon and leaving town. It’s not like I’d ever be on campus again.”
He regarded me quietly, almost frowning with how pensive he looked.
“I may as well live it up here now while I can.”
Because after this semester, I’d never see him again to go to any dance with him.
It’s now or never.