16. Eli
16
ELI
I hated myself when I asked Haley to the dance. A big part of my soul turned blacker and more wicked when I told her to go to the winter formal with me. I hadn’t asked. I hadn’t demanded it. I posed it as a statement that just made sense because she was with me all the time. Because she was the woman I couldn’t stop thinking about.
I wasn’t so great at refraining from kissing her, either. And the taste of her sweet cunt? I wanted it again. All the time.
She’d gotten under my skin and came to matter so damn much that it almost gave me whiplash. I’d spent years shoving her away and not associating with her because I wanted to project the image that I was too cool for the girl connected to a family of whores.
Now I was fucking smitten, worried that I couldn’t pull this off.
“Dude. Do you need a hit or something?” Finn asked as I got ready in our dorm room. He wasn’t going to the dance. He’d offered to come as my wingman or something since he was well aware of how much this event mattered in Preston not telling his dad about my crashing that car.
The dare was to bring Haley to the dance and fuck her there.
I had the first part locked in. But the second?
I can’t do it.
I cringed at my reflection, seriously doubting that I could go through with trying to force Haley to have sex with me there. Even though we were speeding along and getting into a relationship at warp speed, I didn’t want to rush it. I couldn’t. I cared too fucking much, and I wanted to savor every minute I had with her.
Every time she mentioned her plans to graduate and move out of Marsten—which was my eventual plan too—my chest felt too tight.
I wasn’t sure if the rest of the semester would be enough with her, which was ironic because she’d been here at college with me all this time.
Wasted time.
It was cruel to be this devoted to her now and only have so much time to look forward to with her.
“No. I’m good.” I was far from good, but a hit of weed wasn’t going to help.
Taking Haley to this dance that she really didn’t care about made me feel like a fraud, and that didn’t help assuage my guilt at my real feelings that had formed for her.
But what the fuck else can I do? I swallowed hard, hating that I might have screwed up by not telling her.
When I was at her house and going down on her, I loved every second of pleasuring her and calling her mine. That was when I wondered how she’d react if I told her the whole thing. That Preston dared me. That I’d agreed with the dare and she was a pawn in all of it.
She’d hate me if I admitted that. We’d go right back to the way it was a few weeks ago. When that line was still intact between us and she saw me as nothing but an asshole, a bully. Someone she’d hate. As recently as a week ago, when I kissed her that first time in the library, she'd tried to cling to that hatred.
Haley would never forgive me if I admitted the dare now. If I came clean, it would end all that we shared. I was too invested, in too far, to be able to just tell her and know she would forgive me and go along with it.
My only hope was that I could still pull this off. I could bring her. That was a given, although the wording I’d used to get her to agree to come still made me feel like an ass. But it wasn’t like Preston would know if I fucked her there. I could encourage her toward that auxiliary room where the “tradition” was. That side room where people took turns to get a quickie in. It was some stupid ass college lore on campus, a really pointless “honor” to get laid in that room during the winter dance. Maybe there was some big scandal decades ago that started the “tradition”, but it was nothing other than a dumb story now.
Preston wasn’t going to watch us, to know whether I fucked Haley there. Just getting Haley near or in that room to make out would take long enough to throw him off.
He’d never know I didn’t fulfil the dare completely.
That way, I wouldn’t ruin what I had with Haley for however long we’d be together in Marsten.
And that way, he wouldn’t have any grounds to tell the truth about that car accident and force me to pay back my scholarship.
It’ll work out.
“Are you sure?” Finn asked.
I hadn’t realized I’d said that out loud. “Yeah. It’ll be fine.”
Since Haley had a car, or she could use her aunt’s car, she picked me up and drove us to the venue. I couldn’t get a good look of her bundled up in a coat, but I leaned over and kissed her, excited to see her in this dress.
“Why’s it such a big deal that we go?” she asked as she drove.
Dammit. Don’t ask that. Please. Anything but that.
“It’s like you said. Why not?”
She shrugged, parking and getting out of the minivan with me. The dance wasn’t overly crowded, but with the many people mingling and dancing, there were countless people from the college here.
We checked in our coats, and afterward when I held her hand and led her away, I smiled. I didn’t care if we were standing in the middle of the entrance. I was taking my time to really admire her in that silver dress. Instead of baggy clothes to hide behind, she was all here, not overly exposed but revealed in a sexy, gorgeous gown I’d never forget. Silver was officially my new favorite color.
I circled my finger, wordlessly requesting a twirl, and with a shy smile as she blushed, she spun and showed off her sexy body with that shimmering fabric accentuating her curves. Her long, brown locks tumbled over her shoulders, and barely any makeup covered her silky skin. She had a natural beauty—inside and out.
“I wish I had a shawl or something.” She leaned against me as I took her hand.
“Cold?” I asked, letting go of her fingers to wrap my arm around her.
“Just… exposed.” She furrowed her brow as we neared the dance area.
“What did I tell you?” I stopped to grip her chin and encourage her to lift it. “Never hide from me.”
A small smile lifted her lips, but she still seemed so nervous and shy. I understood. I got it. She put so much effort into hiding and not attracting attention to avoid being teased or bullied. And this was a very big social event.
But I was here. She wasn’t facing this alone.
“It’s just you and me here,” I told her, stepping closer and easing her into a dance even though we were on the outskirts of the actual dancing area.
“Not exactly.” She tucked in closer, her body slotting perfectly against mine as though she was made for it. “There are tons of people here. And a lot of them are looking at us. At me. Well, no. You clean up nice. Every woman here is looking at you.”
I chuckled, liking the bite of jealousy in her tone. “No. Everyone is looking at you.”
“Wondering why the hell you’re here with me.”
“No. The girls wish they could be you and the guys wish they could have you.”
The eye roll she gave me was the most epic one yet. “Hilarious.”
“Besides, it doesn’t matter.” I hugged her closer. “I only have eyes for you.” I kissed one cheek. “And I’m the only one who’s going to be here with you.” I kissed her other cheek. As I backed up, I spotted Preston in the background past her. He was surrounded by his friends, the usual group of wealthy assholes and fellow basketball players. Drake, the moron who smacked into the gear stick in that classic car, was with him. He noticed me looking at him, and he elbowed Preston to get his attention. Pointing me out, he made sure Preston realized I was here with Haley.
See?
We’re here.
I got her here.
In my heart, I felt like I got her for good. We’d hurried through a lot of intimacy so far, kissing and touching each other, but this was still so new.
I hadn’t wanted her to go down on me yet.
I didn’t intend to fuck her tonight, either.
She wasn’t ready. Besides, I wanted her first time to be special. I wanted to do right by her.
And I will.
After I met Preston’s gaze and knew he saw her here with me, I worried less about making sure I met that stipulation of the dare. Until I could figure out a good way to encourage her to come to that “famous” side room, I’d enjoy myself with her. And we did.
It was different to be out publicly with her when we were both more or less keeping this a secret. She didn’t want attention, and I respected that. I didn’t want to run the risk of my parents somehow finding out that I was with her, someone from a family they didn’t approve of, so I kept things private too. I didn’t take my phone with me when Finn dropped me off at her place that one evening. While I was with Haley during her aunt’s shift, Finn went to the gym, worked out, showered, and went to the store—all while keeping my phone in his pocket so the tracking would show me doing “normal” things.
We danced and snacked on the catered crap they had here. I didn’t drink, and neither did she, but we were already so drunk on each other that it wouldn’t have helped or hurt the evening if we had ordered a drink.
Eventually, her shyness faded. She got more comfortable with me and didn’t seem to need more reassurance that she could belong at this dance than just being with me.
A really lame song came on, something the DJ chose that made everyone go wild. I’d never cared for it, though, so with an oh, great smirk at Haley, who looked just as annoyed as I was, we laughed and left the main room.
Okay. This is it.
Holding her hand, I steered her toward the side room. As we went, I noticed Drake glancing at us and spotting our progress toward that room.
Oh, shit. What if they rigged it with a camera or something? I wouldn’t put it past them, not only to get proof that I was fucking Haley there as they expected but also to spy on any other couples who went there.
“Are you okay?” Haley asked, squeezing my hand.
“Yeah. Yeah. Sure.” I smiled at her.
“Because I am aware of where you’re leading me.”
I shook my head, smiling. “No. That’s not what I’m doing.”
“Eli. I know how that rumor goes. Back in the fifties, the dean’s daughter tricked a teacher back here and got knocked up that night. The guy was deported, she miscarried, and they both killed themselves.”
I blinked my eyes open wide. “Holy shit. I didn’t realize it was that dark of a basis for the tradition.”
“Yep, some real Romeo and Juliet stuff.”
I frowned. “Wait. Did Professor Blume tell you guys that when I missed Brit Lit one day?”
She laughed as I opened the door to the dark room. No lights were on, but the full moon glowed so brightly in the sky that it lent some illumination to this space. It actually had a nice view of the landscape nearby, visible with a wall of windows from floor to ceiling, wrapping all the way around the curved wall. This room was used as an accessory banquet room for smaller events. So, it wasn’t like I was luring her into a lightless closet.
“No. And that would be more in Shakespeare 101 than Brit Lit.” She shrugged. “Aunt Cindy told me about it. She knew someone who had been a student when it happened.”
“Huh.” I slowed her to face me once the door to this room shut. Fortunately, no one was in here. It seemed we’d lucked out on not interrupting anyone else trying to get lucky here.
“I know that?—”
I kissed her. Not hard, but firmly. Once I had her attention and she kissed me back, I softened my approach and sucked on her lip tenderly before licking it and diving in for a longer, slower, drugging kiss.
“And I know that you know what this room is for,” I replied when she was sagging against me.
“But I’m…” She furrowed her brow, lowering her gaze.
I tipped her chin up, kissing her as gently as I could again. “Not ready,” I finished for her.
She blinked up at me, bewitching me with the trust that shone in her emerald eyes. “No. Not… not yet.”
I kissed her again, crushing her against me. I never wanted to let her go. She slayed me with her honesty. And the fact that she felt comfortable enough to share that honesty with me proved that she really was connected to me. She wasn’t just going along with what I wanted and said to appease me. She was standing up for what she wanted and felt. That kind of confidence was the sexiest thing ever.
“I know,” I said. “And it’s okay.”
“That I don’t want to have sex with you here?”
I nodded.
“And that I’m not ready yet?”
I smiled and lowered to kiss her again. “Yeah. It’s fine. I want to go at your pace, Haley. I don’t want to force you into anything. I respect you too much.”
Her face transformed from slight worry and trepidation to utter joy. “I have been so wrong about you for too long.”
Her praise was a stab in my heart. If she only knew that I’d campaigned to get her here to fuck her for a dare, she wouldn’t be saying something sweet like that.
“So, let me get this straight,” Preston said.
We both whipped our heads around to face him as he strolled out from the shadows at the other side of the room. A door was barely visible there, but I spotted Drake leaning against the wall as Preston calmly walked into the center of the room.
“What the fuck?” I growled, pushing Haley to stand behind me, making sure I remained between her and this rich asshole. “Why are you here?” I demanded it of him but looked back at Drake, too.
He smiled, holding up his hand to waggle a camera in it.
Fuck! I guessed right. They did want to video it!
“Let me get this straight. You’ve got no intention of fucking her here tonight?” Preston smiled, rubbing his chin.
“What? You knew about…” Haley huffed angrily behind me. “What’s going on? Why are you here?”
“You’re going to fail to take her V-card,” Preston taunted me.
“That’s none of your damn business!” Haley stayed behind me but shouted at Preston around me. “Come on, Eli. Let’s go. I don’t want to be near him.”
“It looks to me that you’re failing this dare, Young.”
I stiffened, seething and glaring at him with all the hatred I could ever feel at once. Almost more livid than putting up with my loveless parents. More anger than when I fought my dad back.
“Dare?” Haley tugged on the back of my jacket. “Eli, what’s he talking about?”
“Oh,” Preston said, drawling as he stuck his hands into his pockets. “Just a little thing we agreed on. He claimed he would bring you, the frigid ice bitch, to this dance and take your virginity.”
She stepped back, releasing me.
“Haley, no. I… Wait!” I reached out for her, but she was too quick. Spinning around so fast that her silver gown swirled out like a tornado, she ran out of the room.
Out of my life.
And breaking my fucking heart.