Chapter Twenty-Seven
Theo
For the first time in our short acquaintance, sleeping together meant exactly that.
When I awoke, it was with a crick in my neck and Esther still tucked against me, her head on my chest and waves of silky black tresses everywhere, including one stuck to my lower lip.
I managed to dislodge it without waking her, then shifted carefully against the pillows to stretch the side of my neck.
Those late night confessions had been cathartic for her, I knew, but each one had landed like a blow to my soul. She was truly remarkable, this woman in my arms, and I felt like practically everyone in her life had failed her time and again.
How could I join that line of tragedies in her life, knowing what I did?
Logically, I understood that what happened between us wasn’t just up to me. Emotionally, the urge to shield her, to love and cherish and protect her, was nearly overwhelming in its intensity. She could take care of herself, but I didn’t want her to have to.
Hard to take care of someone from twelve hours away.
That tiny voice in my head taunted me, leering and vicious in its honesty. What was I even thinking? Would I ask her to uproot her life and move to North Carolina with me? Or was I really considering moving back to the hometown I’d forsworn almost twenty years ago?
No answers came from the silent house, not that I expected any.
Since the moment I left Spruce Hill, I’d told myself nothing would force me back here, and yet here I was.
If a spoiled ginger cat had convinced me to return during my parents’ absence, was it so outrageous to think that a woman like Esther would be such a lure?
Maybe it was time to lay the past to rest.
I was grateful she was still asleep during this little crisis of faith. Her stance on baiting my mother’s trap had been perfectly clear right from the start—she wouldn’t stand for it.
Surely my mother would have known that, too.
Not for the first time since my arrival, I wondered what sequence of events my mother had foreseen when she orchestrated this. Maybe she’d expected nothing more than a fling, something to soothe Esther’s spirit and brighten my return.
As soon as the thought occurred to me, I rejected it.
My mom was just as fiercely independent as the woman in my arms, just as sharp and intelligent.
Even if she thought it might work, she would never put Esther in a position like that, even if I was meant as a gift for Esther rather than the other way around.
While my mother might presume to toy with my life, she wouldn’t toy with Esther’s.
Back to square one.
Esther began to stir, waking up slowly, sweetly.
I set aside the endless stream of questions parading through my mind and let myself enjoy the simple pleasure of holding her in my arms, of being the first thing she saw when she blinked her eyes open, pale green in the morning light that snuck through from behind the curtains.
“Hi,” she murmured, her lashes dropping to shield her eyes from the sun as she burrowed closer to me.
“Hi,” I echoed with a smile.
It struck me then and there that this, this beautiful, private moment with her, was the true temptation.
Of all the things that might bring me back to Spruce Hill after so many years away—my parents, my best friends, my history—this was like a hook between my ribs, pulling me inexorably closer to my roots. I didn’t want to give it up.
I didn’t want to give her up.
Of course, there was a hell of a lot more to it than just deciding such a thing, so I kept my mouth shut and enjoyed the way she stretched like a cat, her shirt riding up to reveal a golden swath of skin just above one hip.
I managed to wait three beats before rolling so we were facing one another and sneaking my hand up to that spot, not in any seductive capacity but simply to appreciate the warm silk of her skin.
When I was finally sure she was awake, I gave her hip a squeeze and asked, “What do you have going on today?”
“I have a small order to get ready for a company Christmas party on Thursday, and then I need to make up a bigger order for the high school’s winter formal this weekend. I think that’s it until the Carolcade the weekend after.”
“Do you have any objections to me installing a doorbell camera on the guest house? Roberts suggested it and I think it’s a good idea.” I tried to keep my tone light, unconcerned, but she tensed under my palm.
“No, no objections, if you think it’s necessary,” she replied.
I did, though I wasn’t about to scare her more than I had to.
The thought of someone watching the house, waiting until I left her alone, then creeping up to her door with something that could kill her—fuck, it made me want to burn the world down in her honor.
Instead, I kissed her temple and ran my hand down to cup her ass through the fuzzy pants she had on.
“What time do you need to get started?” I asked, trailing my mouth down her cheekbone to nip at her bottom lip.
She laughed. “Not just yet, Romeo. We’ve got at least an hour or two. Think you can get done whatever it is you wanted to do before then?”
I moved my hand to the crevice behind her knee and hooked her leg over my hip, kissing a path toward her collarbone.
Even as I explored the tiny hollows there, the delicate bones that carried so much on her sweet shoulders, I debated what I treasured more: her low, husky laughter or her helpless, throaty purr.
Reversing the path, I kissed my way back up to her lips and murmured, “I guess that’ll just have to do.”