Chapter 12 #2
He nodded. “That’s what made me so mad, now that I think of it. I knew he knew things he shouldn’t, but where we all were, that description. It was like he was trying to own us to you?” He grimaced. “Was it Davis who made you so upset?”
I took a deep breath. “No. I mean, he even offered to bring me to you.”
A muscle ticked in Jeremy’s jaw. “Go on.” I slipped my hand into his, realizing how much he didn’t like the news. “Murial was…”
I didn’t even know how to finish the statement, which he seemed to recognize, because he said, “A lot. She’s a lot. Take your time.”
“Oh, I almost forgot! There is something I should tell you. She said the best way to get Jeremy Lent to a party is not to invite him.”
He winced. “She said that? She’s probably fucking right.”
“She made Maggie apologize to me again. I think…I think she meant to treat me very differently, but somehow I changed her mind because I got distracted with her Rembrandt. She has a Rembrandt; her daddy bought it for her. Did you see her Warhol downstairs? She owns Pullman and New York, too, including all of you because you fit together. She didn’t want problems with the Lents, and she knows a little about me.
Well, compared to most people, she knows a lot of stuff about me. And…”
He hugged me close, stopping my frantic recitation of events.
“I get it. It was a lot, but fuck her. She doesn’t own us, not to mention this city.
Still, she is scary to a lot of people. We never should have brought you to a party at her place.
I just thought that…well, I got pissed because she didn’t invite me. Damn. I guess I’m easy to read.”
I took his cheeks in my hands, making him focus on my face. “Maggie is in love with you.”
He blinked as if confused. “I love you. So much. I didn’t ask for Maggie’s love and I don’t honestly want it.
I can feel that you love me, too. When you’re ready, you’ll say it.
I’ll know then it is because you feel safe.
I promise not to leave you alone again anywhere like that again.
In the future, you stay glued to me if you don’t know the crowd, okay? ”
I burst into tears then crumpled into his arms. After a few seconds of me incoherently sobbing into his shirt, he jumped off the washer, taking me with him. He nudged the door open, taking me to Barrett’s bedroom. I could hear the snores from the living room despite the closed door.
Then he laid me on the bed before crawling in with me.
“I don’t know what would happen to me if I ever ended up in the world you came from before you moved here.
How would I fit into the countryside of North Dakota, not to mention a typical public school?
I know I don’t know any of the rules or the behaviors or inside jokes.
What if I had to move three times before I got there?
Meanwhile, not only is my family shitting on me, they’re keeping secrets, too.
I don’t know what I would do in your shoes, and I can’t begin to guess how you’ve made it through so much.
I only know that I love you. I will always love you. ”
Jeremy turned on the television, the volume low as I sniffled off the last of my sobs. He added, “Let’s just lie here and watch nothing important.”
I wiped my nose and blinked at him, but he really did seem to get it.
“I never went to public high school either, I wasn’t old enough, but you would’ve probably played ice hockey instead of water polo.
Or basketball. Maybe both? Maybe we could’ve done 4-H club together or something.
Usually, they held dances on the weekend, especially after big games. Music was a big thing.”
Jer snuggled into the blankets with a grunt of agreement before he sought my lips.
After the first kiss, he said, “You fit much better in my world than I would have fit into yours. By the way, I think it’s totally disgusting if she’s stashing a Rembrandt in her upstairs, where no one can appreciate it.
Tacky. She wanted to scare you, and she did.
Maybe she backed off from a full-frontal assault, but it still was a warning and attack, and you have to see it as that, so we can keep you safe. ”
He kissed me again then, and I got a little drunk on the taste of him.
I let him lead me into deeper kisses, our mouths melding until we shared breath and time.
I lost myself in Jeremy, and he didn’t mind at all.
He didn’t seem to be in any rush, peppering kisses across my skin as if sampling a buffet.
My head spun, lightheaded and happy to be that way.
I could hear the drone of some sitcom in the background, but my real focus remained locked on his sighs, his gasps, his tiny moans.
Finally, he pulled away, stilling my hands in his own above my head. I closed my eyes, breathing in his scent, his easy weight on my body making all the adrenaline flow away. My lids closed, and I fell asleep as he rolled me on top of him without another word.
“She okay?” I heard, and tried to wake up. I recognized Barrett’s whisper, but Jer shooshed him before he answered. “Don’t wake her. Physically? She’s fine. Emotionally, she went through a lot last night.”
The bed dipped as Barrett eased in behind me, tugging my body against his with a sigh. I smiled, somewhere between waking and dreamland, but content to be in his arms.
“She’s snoring,” he rumbled as he snuggled me closer to his side. Am I? I tried to wake up again, but he adjusted me neatly into a warm spot, so I sighed and relaxed. “She never snores,” Barrett said as he touched the back of my head.
Jer kissed my forehead, his lips warm and safe. “Go back to sleep, Princess. She’s so exhausted. We can go over the whole night later. It was fucked up, in short. The rest? Later.”
Silence filled the room, and darkness pulled me away from them.
The weight of the sun felt heavier, although I couldn’t explain my sensations upon waking better than that. Then again, the later the hour, the heavier the sun, or so it felt to me.
I lifted my head, stretching and taking in the rest of the room.
All four of the Lents lounged in the room, watching the television.
I remained tucked neatly into Barrett’s embrace, while the other two sat nearby.
They kept the volume so low, they must be reading the captions if they even followed the show.
“Hey,” I said as I tried to sit up. In seconds, Jeremy and Barrett wrapped me back up in their arms, making rising much less appealing.
“Hey,” Julian said as he got to his feet. “Full disclosure? We all texted about what happened to you last night and everyone thinks it was fucked up. I mean really fucked up. I am so sorry we dropped the ball.”
Phoenix lifted his head, and I saw his eyes were red rimmed.
I didn’t think it was from drugs—whether prescription ADHD meds or Ketamine—that he usually used in the evening.
Genuine sentiment roughened his voice when he asked, “Why didn’t you come get me?
I told you to come get me if I took too long. ”
“I couldn’t bear to walk through that crowd after I met with Murial, if I’m honest. All those eyes on me? It felt like every single person in that room stared at me. I just…couldn’t.”
He nodded, despite my confession not even fully making sense to me. He said, “I’m sorry. She should never have been able to get you alone. Who did she send to find you, anyway?”
“Greer,” Jeremy said then winced.
Phoenix sighed. “You do have a lot of lady friends in that crew.”
“She thinks she hooked up with Julian,” I admitted.
His twin arched a brow. “She didn’t.”
“Well, that’s that then,” Phoenix said and stood, brushing his hands off on his legs. “She can’t be allowed to intimidate my girlfriend. I don’t want Alatheia worried about Murial on top of everything else. I mean, Maggie is cray-cray but this wasn’t her. It stinks of Murial.”
I sat up, reaching for him. “Phoenix, be honest. She’s more powerful than you.
I might not know much, but I recognize powerful.
Even Dina can’t control Murial. There isn’t anything you can do, and besides, she says we’re going to hang out.
She promised to show me art like I won’t believe, and she wants me to learn about a painter. I think she wants us to be friends?”
“She doesn’t have friends,” Phoenix said, with emphasis on the word before he rubbed his eyes like they hurt which, due to redness, appeared to actually hurt. “No, I’m gonna call that one. You’re not hanging out with her. If you want to look at paintings, you can go with Tiffany.”
Jer imitated Julian from earlier. “I like paintings, too.”
Barrett arched an eyebrow. “This isn’t about us, it’s about her having female companionship.”
Phoenix frowned. “Fine, but if she is hanging out with Murial, one of us should tag along. Just show up wherever you’re going, even.
It would be stupid not to make sure you were safe, and she has to respect that.
If you look at art with Queen Murial, you have one of us as an escort.
You guys can’t even disagree, because she could take it too far, or Davis could show up.
I hate him more today than I did yesterday. ”
My head pounded, so I rubbed at my temples in frustration. “Why does everything have to be so complicated all the time?”
“It doesn’t,” Julian said and squeezed my foot. Barrett didn't say anything, seeming lost in thought.
He finally stood, clapping his hands as if he’d made a decision. “We need brunch. Food for everyone, that’s what we need. Get dressed. We’re going to brunch.”
I rolled my legs off the bed quickly, happy at the idea of food, since my stomach growled at the thought. “The jazz club was really fantastic, by the way. I feel like it got lost in everything that happened after, but I wanted to thank you.”
Barrett’s smile made it worth remembering to take the time to thank him. “I wish we’d gone home then, because it would’ve been easier.”
I shrugged, since Murial would’ve found me at some point. At least it is over.
“She was barefoot,” I told Julian, as if it mattered. Then again, he would understand because I’d told him about my shoe theory.
He lifted his eyebrow. “You might need a new category.”
Somehow, I didn’t think Murial fit into anyone’s categories.
They showered, which gave me a few minutes to myself.
Instead of worrying about how I looked, I opened Dina’s journal, because I missed her.
Life got busy, so we didn't have as much time to stop and see her lately.
I intended to check on her later that day, and made a mental note before I started reading.
AUGUST 16TH 1966
I’m married. I can hardly believe I am writing that.
I am married. There, I said it again. How many times do I have to say it before it feels real?
It’s Tuesday now, but we got married four days ago in Louisiana.
We couldn’t get married here in New York City, because I’m eighteen, which is illegal here without my uncle’s permission.
I wouldn’t bother to try to get that, but in Louisiana, they feel eighteen is an adult.
Due to that, we got married on our way out of town.
My mother-in-law—officially family now—handed me her pearls as we left the house. They’re lovely, but I didn’t understand her choice of gift. Was it a wedding gift? She lifted an eyebrow at me, then pointed at the necklace. “So no one will ever make you feel small again.”
For a second, she squeezed my hand, so I almost forgot her strange coldness all week leading up to the elopement.
Regardless, now I am Mrs. Nathaniel Lent.
He’s the oldest, so in their family, I guess that’s how it works.
Despite the words on the marriage certificate, I’m married to all of them now, which is magical.
We took vows quietly, privately—all of us together, making promises only we would understand.
Afterward, we went to the judge who gladly signed the papers to legally make me wed to Nathaniel.
We dressed up formally, standing together as if in ceremony despite our lack of audience.
Then Ed drove us to New Orleans. It took seven hours, but we laughed the whole journey. Victor blushed at some of the bawdier jokes, but when our eyes met, I knew it wasn’t just me. They could feel how intense everything became for us.
The sun had long set, and the hour was late when we arrived, but we checked into the Roosevelt Hotel.
I stared at the beautiful marble floors, shined to an almost unbelievable gloss, while Nathanial took care of things, then followed them and the bags up the elegant stairwell.
Colors seemed brighter, the sheen on things glossier, the vibrancy increased by my knowledge of my new grooms following me down the hallway.
They booked us three rooms, so as to not raise eyebrows, but we all entered the same room with two beds without hesitation.
It shouldn’t work. But it does. It really does.
The next morning, we flew from Moisant to JFK.
Eastern Airlines. We dressed in Sunday best variety clothing, and the propeller plane lifted us off the ground with a lurch that tumbled my stomach as we rose into the clouds.
I am a married woman. People wouldn’t ever understand our arrangement.
Not ever, even if I bothered to try. Regardless of the world’s thoughts, I am now Mrs. Dina Lent.
Mrs. Dina Newport Lent, and that won’t ever change.
I don’t know what will happen to us, but I am in this with them.
This is my happiness,
D
“Red,” Phoenix said as he flopped down next to me.
“I was fucked up last night, and I’m sorry I messed up.
” He turned his head away for a second, then focused on my eyes with deadly seriousness in his gaze.
“I get that you couldn’t get to me. I understand, and I don’t want you to feel like I’m blaming you for not getting me.
I wouldn’t have expected you to face that kind of social pressure, if I’d realized.
” His lips trembled, as if emotion made it hard for him to continue.
“But Barrett is never that drunk, so I figured he had things under control. The next time—if there is ever a next time—you find him. Do you understand? Do not leave without one of us. You don’t have to face things alone. ”
I touched the side of his face, sighing because he made it sound so easy. Still, easier to agree than argue, so I said, “Okay.”