Chapter 14 #2
Colton puts the ring over Graham’s cock, slides it to the base where he presses it snug.
“Keep this here. When I turn it on, it stays on and against your balls until I take it off you. Understand?” He puts some dominance in his tone and it’s horrible to feel aroused and wanting but inferior all at once.
The command rolls off Graham, who’s in too much emotional turmoil to give in to him.
“Jonah said—”
Colton’s gaze jerks to him, clearly surprised Graham is bringing him up again and arguing.
“Don’t make me gag you because I will. You’re obsessing about it because you’re crashing.”
“No, I’m not obsessing. It’s just the truth! You used him and preferred him, but you’re stuck with me. I can’t do this. I need to be left alone.”
Colton turns away from him. He drops a blanket over Graham then goes to the door.
He opens it up, talks briefly to someone, and comes back in carrying a portable bench.
Straps that can tie his hands down. More ties for his thighs and his calves.
If he was strapped in, he’d be the perfect height for Colton to fuck.
He’d just be a hole for Colton to use. Reduced down to nothing, helpless, only able to take it.
But there’s a crop on the bed. He isn’t going to get fucked, is he? Because he’s disgusting and unwanted. He’s going to get hit with an implement instead.
Colton closes the door again and comes toward Graham, reaches for him. “Come on. Let’s get you onto the bench.”
He’s not wanted. He’s nothing better than some charity case! He can’t be that again. “I don’t want this. I want you to leave me alone.”
Colton’s eyes squeeze shut, his brow furrows. He presses his forehead to Graham’s. “Leaving you alone is not an option. You don’t… you don’t mean that. You’re just in a bad place. You have to trust me, Graham.” But Colton sounds uncertain. Just a little.
Graham latches on to it, counts it as more evidence that Colton doesn’t really want him.
If he did, he’d be certain. He’d force Graham because Graham was his.
Colton said he’d do things to Graham, made lots of promises, and here they are and he’s getting nothing. Colton can barely be bothered with him.
Graham gags, his stomach heaving.
Colton is all consideration and unending softness. Acid burns through his throat and he hates Colton suddenly. “I don’t have to do anything. You’re lying to me. This isn’t you. I can tell. I’m not crazy or sick. He told me how you are. You don’t want me. Fuck you.”
Colton grabs him hard by the jaw, forcing him to be quiet.
“This is how I am with you,” he snarls. “And you are to be agreeable and open and willing when you are with me. When we are together, you are what I make you and everything, everyone else is irrelevant.” He kisses Graham hard, bites him, and Graham tastes blood.
Graham cries out, his hand on Colton’s chest, and he can feel his heart pounding. He reaches down, presses his hand against Colton’s cock, needing to know for sure.
He’s half-hard. It’s all the proof he needs.
Tears spill out of Graham’s eyes. This man doesn’t want him. All of this truly is a lie.
Colton makes a crooning sound, licks Graham’s face, tasting his tears. Pretending. He pulls back, seems disoriented. He reaches into the bag, comes out with a plug and hesitates. Colton licks his lips, stares at Graham like he’s in a daze.
“Look at those tears. You gonna give me more of them?” he asks, voice husky. Graham still has a hand on Colton’s cock, and the man is now hard, but it isn’t enough. It’s the dominance itself that made him hard, not necessarily Graham.
Graham could’ve been anyone.
Colton squeezes a cold glob against Graham’s hole and presses the plug in. It’s hard and stubby, not particularly large. A moment later it turns on, vibrating inside him. Then the cock ring turns on and he can’t escape it although he wants to.
“No!” Graham gasps.
“Who do you belong to, sweetheart?”
He knows what he should say. And a part of him wants to reassure Colton and say what Colton wants him to. But it isn’t true. Colton isn’t his and he isn’t Colton’s. That’s become painfully clear to him over the last twenty-four hours.
He looks at Colton’s face, sees that the Dominant is distressed, and he swallows down bile. He wishes he could give Colton what he wants. He wishes he could be what Colton desires. But he isn’t even good enough to fuck.
“I’m sorry,” Graham says. “I wanted you. I really did, but I…” I’m broken and we both know it. I’m not a submissive anyone would want.
Colton blinks back tears. “Don’t apologize. You’ve caught me a little off guard is all. It will work out. I’ll work it out,” he says, but he doesn’t sound convinced or confident. He sounds devastated.
A submissive is meant to make a Dominant feel confident. Instead, Graham is hurting Colton. Graham will ruin him if he can’t make Colton leave him alone.
Can he save Colton? If Graham can end this now, make Colton leave, then won’t he have done one good thing? That might be the only generous thing he can do at this point. And when Colton is gone, he’s going to end it once and for all.
“Turn this off. Please? I don’t like it.”
Colton flinches. His hand is hovering, shaking, poised uncertainly over Graham’s crotch.
The buzzing in his ass is getting worse.
He feels numb and shaky. His cock spasms and come slides out of the head of his cock, pooling onto his stomach.
It’s not a lot, maybe a dime’s worth, but Colton puts a hand on Graham’s cock and jerks him off, careful and easy.
“There you go. Good boy. You’re almost hard,” Colton murmurs.
“He said—”
“Please don’t do this, Graham. Not right now.” Colton is biting his lip and he looks pale. He’s no one Graham recognizes.
“He said… he said you were a lot to handle. He wants to keep seeing you. Do you care?”
The hand stills. “No, I don’t. I don’t give a shit about him, Graham,” he whispers. “He isn’t you. All I care about is you.” His tone lacks conviction. The words are right. This is wrong. Colton can’t even look at him. His head is down, shoulders hunched a little. A puppet with his strings cut.
“I don’t know you and you don’t know me. This is who I—hey, look at me,” Graham demands and Colton’s gaze slowly turns to him, eyes wet and wide. It’s all wrong.
Colton should be the one demanding.
Graham is supposed to submit.
But he’s so fucked up and bad at being a submissive that he’s going to destroy the Dominant before him if he can’t make Colton go.
Graham hates this vibrating thing on him. He reaches for it, puts a hand on himself to take it off.
“No, leave it. Please, Graham.”
Graham ignores him. He starts to take it off, tugging it up his cock, shivering with sensation as it touches the ridge under the head of his penis. Colton tries to stop him. Graham bats his hand away, pulls the ring off, and Colton grabs Graham’s wrist hard in his.
“Give that to me. This is for your own good and you know it.” His dominance hurts. But all Graham does is hurt. The pain of resisting can’t be worse than what he’s already feeling.
“This isn’t submission and you aren’t dominating me.
We both have to want this and I don’t. I can’t stand this after what you’ve done to him.
I just can’t.” He throws the ring and it hits the wall, buzzing on the ground then stopping abruptly.
“You should go now. Send in one of the doctors. They’ll pump me full of whatever and you can go find someone you really want.
Someone who knows what they’re doing and—” His voice breaks.
Why is he crying?
“Graham, I don’t know what to do here. I don’t know if this is you dropping, or if you genuinely don’t…
don’t want me now. If I push this and you really don’t want me…
I don’t want to take advantage of you.” Colton’s hunched over.
His fear and uncertainty make Graham want to be sick again.
“Jonah was nothing, truly, but if—” He shoves his hands into his hair, paces away from him.
Colton opens the door, is talking to someone out there. “He’s upset. I—I don’t think I can help him.”
“It’s alright. Tell me what’s going on,” the doctor says. Graham recognizes her voice from all his trips to medical.
“Things have changed. I’m scared he doesn’t want this. I can’t get him through this if he doesn’t want me.”
“He’s agreed to be your submissive. He signed the request to be under your jurisdiction. Of course he wants this.”
“No! He’s hurt because of something I did. He doesn’t agree now that he knows what I’ve done. He’s telling me to leave. How can I not honor that? I don’t know what the fuck to do!” he shouts. He’s panting.
“He is your submissive and he is in pain. Why don’t you start with the bench and implements then progress to anal sex. A slower start may help you two reconnect, and—”
Colton’s voice is low and furious. “I’m not going to tie him down to a goddamned bench and fuck him raw when I don’t know if he wants it. Rape is rape. If he doesn’t want it and I make that mistake… Fuck, I’d probably kill myself.”
“What the hell is going on?” Mack asks, joining the conversation.
Graham doesn’t bother to look at any of them. None of this concerns him. All it proves is that he is a terrible submissive that no Dominant wants. Colton doesn’t even want to hurt him, let alone fuck him. That’s how worthless he is.
“Oh good. Another perspective. Colton, do you know Mack Grange? He’s a Dominant who has known Graham for a few years.
You’ll be working together in the future…
probably,” the doctor says. “Colton had a very successful post-mission encounter with Graham, twice, and the papers have been signed. Graham is in a very severe drop and has reacted badly to his dominance. And we’re now at an impasse.
But something has to be done immediately.
I can take Graham to medical but legally he is yours,” the doctor says.
It should be the most perfect thing he’s ever heard. His Dominant is here and can use him. His Dominant will take care of him. Instead, it’s horrible.
Graham lets them talk, eager to drift away into the darkness.