Chapter 32
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
EVERLY
I ’m warm.
That’s the first thing I notice as I wade through the heavy weight of exhaustion toward consciousness. Every inch of my body feels it. From my toes to the tips of my ears, there’s no place on me that doesn’t feel overheated.
But it’s not necessarily an unpleasant heat.
With it comes something else. Something unexpected. There’s a pleasurable ache sitting in my lower abdomen where the heat is being generated. It grows more intense the more aware of it I become. A slow-moving wave of heavenly bliss rolls through me, causing my breath to catch and my heart to race.
Oh god… A soft groan slips past my lips as I finally crack open my eyes.
It’s not completely dark in the room. That’s the first thing I notice.
There’s a pale light beginning to creep in through the edges of the thick, velvet curtains in Rowan’s room.
It’s morning. What time in the morning, I’m not sure, but it’s early. Too early.
But the early start to the day isn’t what I focus on.
Instead, it’s the pleasure building between my legs that snags my attention.
I let out a soft moan as another wave rolls through me.
What’s going on? I’ve never awoken feeling so aroused before.
It would be scary if I didn’t love how good it felt.
I squeeze my thighs together, an instinctual move as I choke on another moan.
A hand prevents me from closing them all the way.
For a second, I freeze. The last hooks that sleep had on me vanish as I wake fully.
My senses go into overdrive as I process what’s happening.
Fingers are buried deep inside my body, pumping unhurriedly in and out.
In fact, the motion feels almost absentminded.
As does the way a thumb brushes lightly over my throbbing clit.
All of it is painfully slow and sloppy. The thing is, this must’ve been going on for a bit because my thighs are slick with my arousal, and I can tell by the easy way the fingers slide in and out of me that they’re drenched.
Whatever pain Braum had caused the day before has subsided or been overpowered by the slow and steady way these fingers are pushing me toward the edge of oblivion.
At my back, Rowan’s moving. At first, I think it’s to get comfortable.
It takes a few seconds for me to realize he’s rubbing his hard dick against the crack of my butt over the boxers he lent me, the motion mimicking the speed of his fingers inside me. His breath is even, and the arm draped over my waist is utterly limp, letting me know he’s still asleep.
I should be repulsed. Rowan is toying with me even in his sleep.
Instead, the steady, unhurried way Rowan’s rubbing himself against me and fingering my pussy, unaware of his own actions yet desperate to find some sort of pleasure with me, settles something inside my chest. Even in slumber I’m wanted by this man.
How is it that it takes risking my life to find someone out there who wants me, no craves me, enough to seek me out even in sleep?
I’m a broken woman—that’s the only explanation for why I find Rowan’s deep slumber thrusting a comfort and why the thought helps tip me over the edge.
My orgasm is slow moving but all consuming.
It steals my breath, causes my nipples to harden, and brings tears to my eyes.
I capture the cry at the last minute, biting my bottom lip to keep it from breaking the stillness in the moment.
My body grips Rowan’s fingers as I shudder through the pleasure.
There must’ve been enough pressure to stop him because his fingers come to a halt deep in my pussy.
As my release ebbs away, my body sags and I let out a long, shaky breath.
Guilt and shame flood my nervous system as the pleasure fades.
How is it that, again, I’m finding pleasure where none should be?
Giving head, enjoying anal, and finding a release while my virginity was taken from me…
it’s all so bizarre and uncomfortable. Why did I just let Rowan do this?
Even now, as he continues to rub his dick against me, seeking his own relief through lazy thrusts, I’m not pulling away.
No wonder Maverick didn’t want to leave with me—if there’s anyone who has ever really known me, it was him.
Maybe Mavie could see this brokenness inside me.
Did he catch a glimpse and realize I’m not worth leaning on for help?
Did he think I was made up of too many broken pieces to put his faith into?
Probably. If that’s the case, I don’t blame him.
The heaviness of that bitter truth, along with a renewed sense of exhaustion, cause my eyelids to begin fluttering shut.
My eyes are just about to close when I spot something out of place.
Tension instantly locks up my limbs when I spot Braum sitting on the floor a few feet away.
His legs are pulled up so his forearms can rest on his knees, and his back is leaning against Rowan’s dresser. His eyes are pinned to my face.
“Everly,” he greets quietly with a shallow nod.
My heart takes off into a gallop as I stare at the man on the floor. What does he want? Why is he here? How long has he been sitting there watching me sleep? Oh shit, did he just witness…? My face heats in mortification as I realize what he just saw.
Flustered and more than a little alarmed, I ask with a quiet squeak, “What are you?—?”
“Shh, don’t wake Rowan,” he says as I begin to cringe back into the body pressed against mine.
Braum gets to his feet and moves toward me. I suck in a sharp breath, stiffening further as he approaches the bed. He doesn’t stop when he gets to the edge. He simply lifts the covers and slips beneath them. His weight causes the mattress to dip, and I almost roll toward him before he settles in.
“What are you doing?!” I hiss quietly.
“I didn’t want to climb in while you were sleeping and scare you. I’ve done enough of that,” Braum grimaces. “But I can’t sleep without the whispering of The Universe. I’ve always had it to lull me to sleep. So now that you’re awake…”
I suck in a sharp breath when he reaches for me. Is he going to strangle me? Yank me toward him and force me to cuddle up against his chest?
Braum does neither of those things. He simply grabs my hand, pulls it halfway toward him and rests it in the small space that separates us, then he weaves our fingers together. He lets out a soft, albeit long, sigh of relief.
A minute creeps by before I realize he’s not going to do anything other than this. The tension humming inside me lessens some as I watch Braum’s face closely.
“This is going to help you sleep?” I ask incredulously.
“I can hear it when we touch one another,” he murmurs. “It’s not as loud as when I’m inside you but this will suffice.”
My pussy clenches around Rowan’s fingers as I remember how Braum had felt deep inside me; how it hurt and how it…
hadn’t. My face heats up again. With Rowan’s fingers still inside me while he ruts up against my back, it seems insane my mind can even drift to what Braum and I had done.
Or how he’d taken care of me afterward. Or how his eyes are currently staring at me with a sleepy awe, as if he can’t really believe I’m laying before him.
I’m not sure how I’m supposed to fall asleep like this, between my two captors, but I’m tired. Hopefully, sleep will come easy. My eyelids just flutter closed when Braum shifts closer.
“Everly,” he whispers.
With a sigh, I open my eyes. I’m surprised to find us nearly nose to nose.
“You don’t believe I could hear The Universe or that you now hold it within you, do you?”
The question takes me off guard. It seems strange to ask me now, when I did all that I could to help him find peace earlier. I take my time to consider my answer. With Braum in such a fragile mental state, I don’t want to upset and send him spiraling once more.
“I believe you when you say you hear something others can’t,” I admit softly.
“And I believe what you hear holds a lot of value to you. Is it The Universe? I don’t know—how would I?
But if that’s what you think it is, then who am I to judge?
And if you think I have it, well… as long as you don’t strangle me again?—”
His hand tightens around mine. “I won’t ever touch you like that again.”
“—then, I guess I’ll take good care of it for you until you can take it back.”
“How considerate,” Braum says, then lets out a low chuckle. “In the future, you can say no, Everly. Though I appreciate the thoughtful response.”
I give him a tired smile but it fades quickly. Today was a lot. I’m physically sore from our altercation and emotionally drained. All I want to do is escape back into my dreams.
He looks down at where our hands join and gives mine a squeeze. “I’m not crazy, Everly.”
“I didn’t say you were,” I murmur.
“I know, but you’re thinking it. I don’t need The Universe to tell me that. Everyone else here thinks so too,” Braum replies as he continues to stare at our hands. “But I need you to know I’m not.”
“Why? What does it matter what I think?”
His gaze rises. When his dark eyes stop on my face the fatigue and awe that had been there before have vanished. Now he’s staring at me wide awake and full of intent.
“Because if you think I’m crazy, you won’t believe what I have to tell you.”
I encourage him with a nod. “Try me.”
“If you know about the Children of the White Stag, then they undoubtedly know about you.” I jolt in surprise.
I hadn’t expected Braum to bring it up but now that he has, I’m curious.
Before I can speak, he adds quickly, “It’s dangerous just knowing their name.
You can’t bring them up again, ever. Got it? ”
“Wait, how do you know about them? How does whoever wrote that note know?—”
“Everly,” Braum interrupts, his tone grave. “If I could tell you, I would. You’ve done so much for me. More than I could possibly explain right now. I owe you. But this…?” He shakes his head slowly. “I can’t . And I’m guessing whoever told you about them couldn’t elaborate either, could they?”
My heart drops as my excitement fades.
“It’s absolutely forbidden to speak of them,” Braum pushes. “They’ve managed to remain secret for nearly a hundred years, without anyone outside the society knowing about them. They do that by erasing anyone who they even think might know about them. Be very careful.”
I know the warning should scare me. Whoever the Children of the White Stag are, they’re dangerous. But the threat of disappearing isn’t as horrible as Braum might think.
“Why are you smiling?” he whispers, his brows furrowing with confusion.
My body trembles as I quietly giggle. “I was already in the process of erasing myself long before I came to Serenity Falls. I started even before I found out Maverick was here.”
“Why?” Braum asks.
I roll my eyes. “I wouldn’t even know where to begin to explain. Even if I did, why should I tell you?”
“Because,” Braum murmurs. “Our lives are woven together. I want to know everything about you.”
“Tough shit.”
The blunt answer isn’t what either of us are expecting from me. It must be the exhaustion. Or maybe it’s because I know him relatively intimately now and my soul recognizes his?
My body shakes as I giggle again. Okay, yeah, it’s definitely the former.
Braum opens his mouth to speak again but just as he does, something about what he says flips a switch in my head.
Shock rocks my body, causing me to jolt with a hard gasp.
Behind me, Rowan’s breathing stutters and his gentle rutting stops.
Both Braum and I freeze. It’s not until Rowan’s breathing evens out and his hips start grinding against me that we both relax.
Braum scoots closer. “What’s wrong?—”
“Shush, I’m thinking,” I whisper anxiously as I stare into the darkness.
They do that by erasing anyone who they even think might know about them…
Holy shit. Who do I know whose life has befallen that very fate?
Only one person comes to mind and he’s the reason I’m at Serenity Falls in the first place.
I gasp. Father and Peter… they were involved with this organization.
Did they pull strings to get Maverick here?
Or is being able to make people disappear a perk of being part of the organization?
“That’s what happened to Maverick,” I mutter. “My father, and probably brother, must’ve pulled some strings with these people to get him here after Mavie found out their little secret. I wonder if they were doing a job for the Children of the White Stag or if it was a side hustle for Father?”
Braum frowns. “What are you talking about?”
I open my mouth to respond, wishing desperately to talk to someone about this, but I choke on the words.
As I stare into Braum’s handsome face, I remember why I’m in this bed, under this roof and who I’m lying between.
Braum isn’t my friend or an ally. Anything I tell him might end up biting me in the ass later on.
Or worse, end up biting Maverick in the ass.
“Never mind.” I force my eyes to close. “I don’t know what I’m talking about. It must be the lack of sleep.”
“Everly, talk to me. Let me be there for you like you were for?—”
“ Goodnight , Braum.”