Chapter 18 #2
A cheer went up from the crowd, and I turned to see Juliette and Dylan walking through the parking lot. I laughed as Juliette practically skipped over to us, dragging Dylan with her. Liam released me into Juliette’s arms, and she hugged me and squealed.
“Shh,” I whispered.
“I knew it. He’s perfect for you,” she whispered back.
“It’s barely been a week. Chill.”
“You know I’m right,” Juliette said, undeterred.
“Go celebrate your man.” I gently pushed her toward Dylan and smiled as they worked their way around to greet everyone.
Juliette hugged most people and shook hands with a few.
It made me so happy to see the way she was thriving with Dylan.
Just a year ago, she would’ve dreaded this.
I knew she was still uneasy, but she handled it like a champ now.
Liam tipped his head down and whispered, his breath tickling my ear, sending tendrils of heat through my body. “I agree with Juliette.”
“Maybe,” I teased, but I definitely agreed. He was perfect.
He was like steak. I always thought I disliked steak, and then I realized it was because I’d only tried it well done. Once I had my first taste of a good, juicy steak, I loved it. Craved more. Wanted to make up for all the lost time.
I’d barely had a taste of being with Liam, but I hoped it would be just like that.
Before Liam could respond, more people came over.
“Corrie,” I called, drawing her attention to me. “It’s Jenna. How are you?”
“Hi Jenna! I’m good, you?”
“Great. We just got some new Braille romances. You should come by when you get a chance.”
“Oh, I will. Thank you!” Corrie was blind, and she was awesome. We’d had a long discussion about Braille books, and since I brought it up to Robert, my director, the library had been more on top of keeping them up to date.
I said hello to her husband Quint, who was a cop, and he introduced me to Conor and his wife, Erin.
“You work at the Sloppy Cow, right? I remember Juliette was so excited to go and meet you.”
“Yep, that’s me,” Erin said. “You should come with them next time.”
“I’d love to!” I could tag along with Juliette anyway, but would I be invited to more get togethers now as Liam’s girlfriend? I wasn’t keen on bars usually, but I didn’t think I’d mind with him at my side.
Juliette returned, and I linked my arm with hers as we walked into the restaurant and followed Liam and Dylan to a corner booth, Nicky and Ryan and the others right behind us.
“After you.” Liam gestured for me to go in ahead of him, obviously on the side against the wall.
I slid into the corner seat, and Liam scooted in next to me. Nicky sat on the other side of Liam, and Juliette, Dylan, and Ryan sat across from us. The rest of Dylan and Liam’s friends filled the other booths around the restaurant.
The room suddenly felt smaller now that it was filled with so many large men.
I felt smaller. They weren’t just any men, I reminded myself.
These were our friends, and many of their wives and girlfriends, who’d also become friends, were here too.
But still...you never really knew what someone could be capable of.
Even firefighters and cops weren’t exempt from sometimes being the bad guy.
Liam leaned in close and whispered, “You okay?”
“I’m good,” I said, surprised by the depth of understanding in his eyes.
Yes, I’d had a negative thought, but I didn’t think I’d reacted outwardly at all.
How did he know? He held my eyes for a moment, then the seat shifted as he moved closer and his thick leg pressed against mine, offering me comfort with his presence.
“This alright?”
He studied me while I decided, and I realized three things.
One, only our legs were touching. He hadn’t put his hand on my leg, which I deeply appreciated.
Two, I knew with certainty he wouldn’t put his hands on me without my permission.
Three, I really liked the feel of his strong, muscular thigh against mine.
I nodded, unable to stop the grin spreading across my face as warmth bloomed under my skin. Who would've thought I’d like his touch? Or trust him so much? Or that his pleased look would make me feel so good?
Overwhelmed in the best way, I redirected my attention across the table to Juliette and Dylan. “Congratulations! I’m so happy for you guys. I always knew you were too stubborn to stay down.”
They exchanged a sweet look, thanked me, and kissed. I was so thrilled for them.
Dylan’s return to work was the official reason for the party.
But at this table especially, we were just as excited to celebrate Juliette and Dylan as a couple.
They’d been through a nightmarish few months with Dylan’s injuries, their breakup, and his grueling rehab. They deserved their happily ever after.
I filled Juliette and Nicky in on the latest with the sensory room grant.
Besides genuinely valuing their input as awesome occupational therapists, I knew it was a topic that Juliette could get sucked into.
Her dyspraxia symptoms—slurred speech, clumsiness, and overall awkwardness—got worse when she was nervous, and being in a crowd like this, especially with the focus on Dylan, and therefore her along with him, would normally have her wrecked.
I was impressed with how calm she seemed, and I loved Dylan for being so good for my best friend.
The sensory room was a topic she could speak confidently about, and that made all the difference for her.
The waitress came over with a tray of shots, courtesy of a table across the restaurant where some of the cops were sitting—Quint and Corrie, Conor and Erin, and also Hayden, a sheriff’s deputy, and her husband Boone, who I’d met earlier.
The guys gave them chin lifts, one of those macho moves they all did, and Juliette, Nicky, and I smiled our thanks while Ryan passed the drinks around the table.
“To Dylan,” Ryan said as we clinked our glasses.
Cheers and whistles rang out from around the room. Despite my crazy reservations about people in general, a warm fuzzy feeling filled me. These guys truly were a team.
Everyone at the table knocked back their shot. I pretended to drink mine like always, studiously avoiding Liam’s knowing gaze. Everyone pretended not to notice, as usual, and I was so grateful for these friends.
Liam whispered in my ear, “If you want a drink, I can get you something directly from the bar. I’ll keep my eye on it.”
“No thanks.”
He nodded, but I knew he’d ask me about it later. The reason I didn’t drink when I was out was simple: I didn’t like feeling less in control of myself. It made me feel too exposed, too vulnerable.
The reason I’d wasted hundreds on barely touched drinks? That was more complicated. I didn’t want to drink, but part of me wanted to be the kind of person who did. The kind who wasn’t afraid.
I turned back to Juliette and Nicky to avoid more questions. “They’re going to start construction on the sensory room this week. Can you guys come to the library tomorrow to make sure there’s nothing else I need to add to the plans?”
“Sure. I’ll have plenty of time after work,” Juliette said with a sad smile, and Dylan kissed her forehead. So sweet.
“I have so many ideas,” Nicky said, almost as excited as me. “Will the room be dark enough to use a star projector?”
“Yes, there will be a lot of small, round windows, like on a space shuttle to stick with the theme. Those will be on the bottom half of the interior walls to provide easy visibility from the main children’s area for safety, and they said they can tint the windows, which should keep it dark enough to get the full effect. ”
“Bubble tubes too?” Juliette said in her signature way of using just enough words to get her point across.
“Yes! I looked them up the other day, I love them.”
I was so excited. With Juliette and Nicky’s help this room would be a perfect space: a calming, engaging place for people with autism and sensory needs to enjoy. With their help, we were on our way to having the best sensory friendly library in the city.
Juliette, Nicky, and I kept talking about our plans for the library while the guys caught Dylan up with work and razzed him about picking up extra duties to make up for his time off.
Throughout it all, I was constantly aware of the warmth of Liam’s leg against mine.
I liked it. A lot. And I loved that he didn’t try to do anything more.
Apparently, my leg and my core were directly linked, and even though Liam probably knew it with his spidey senses, he still didn’t do more.
“How’s the backyard coming along?” Dylan asked Liam.
“Good. It’ll be done pretty soon.”
“What did you—” Dylan cut off suddenly, and I looked up at Liam, realizing he’d not-so-subtly shushed him.
“What were you going to ask?” I coaxed Dylan, leaning in.
“What color he chose for the deck stain,” he deadpanned.
“No, you weren’t.”
Dylan looked at Liam, and Liam grinned at me, shrugging like he was so innocent.
“Fine, fine. I’ll wait patiently for my surprise.”
“Thank you, Firefly,” he said softly.
Juliette’s and Nicky’s jaws dropped in almost cartoonish expressions.
“Yeah, we’re definitely having a girls’ night tomorrow,” Nicky said. “We’ll meet you at the library, then we’re going out to talk.”
The food came, and we all continued talking about various plans, including a barbecue in Liam’s mysterious backyard.
Engrossed in our conversation, I was startled when I felt Liam stiffen. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m not sure. Something’s going on with the cops.”
Sure enough, a lot of the men and a few women were on their phones, talking or texting. There was a buzz of energy around the room. Everyone at one of the tables, plus a few others scattered around the room dropped a few bills on the tables and left, distractedly saying goodbye on their way out.
“I’ll see what I can find out,” Liam said. Nicky stood to let him out, and he walked over to sit in one of the vacated seats. I shivered at the sudden coldness without him next to me.
A few minutes later, Liam returned looking furious.
I was so used to him, I sometimes forgot how big he was, but seeing him now, there was no denying the formidable soldier he truly was.
Nicky scooched closer to me to make room for him to sit, but he shook his head no, so Nicky got up to let him in, and he scooted in beside me, closer than before.
Relief and dread warred inside me at his return. I’d never seen him so tense.
He held my gaze, worry in his eyes as he said, “A woman was attacked at Atteren Park.”
“Just now?” Ryan asked.
“Earlier this evening.”
My pulse pounded in my ears. “We were there.”
Liam squeezed my hand.
“Was her body just found?” Nicky asked. “Wasn’t everyone here off duty? It must’ve been brutal for them all to get called in.”
“Not murder,” Liam answered without taking his eyes off me. “It was a sexual assault.”
My breath stuttered, my chest tightening. Liam released my hand and pulled me in close. His lips brushed the skin behind my ear, his breath warm, his voice soft. “Breathe, Firefly. You’re safe. I’m here and your friends are here.”
Nicky kept pushing. “That’s bad obviously, but not that bad in the grand scheme of crimes that happen in the city. So what’s really going on?”
Liam tightened his grip, glancing over at her. He spoke through a clenched jaw. “They think it may be connected to another assault.”
I’m not sure if he said more after that. The blood pounding in my head was too loud to hear anything. A serial rapist. Assaulting innocent women. In the park I go to. The park that I was just at. I might’ve walked right past the victim. Or the rapist.
“You’re okay,” Liam said softly near my ear. I jumped.
I nodded. I wasn’t okay, but I didn’t want to tell him that.
He’d figure it out soon enough. If Liam hadn’t been there, it could’ve just as easily been me.
How could I ever walk Thor there again? But if I couldn’t walk Thor, if I wasn’t safe doing the things I loved to do, the things I’d worked so hard to be able to do…
Oh God. A tight band of panic cinched around my ribs, stealing my breath and hurtling me back to a time when I was too afraid to do anything.
Why now? Just when things were starting with Liam, when I wanted to be my best for him, he was going to see me at my worst.
The conversation continued around me, and I did my best to look engaged, but mostly I tried to ignore the concern I felt rolling off of Liam.
I felt Juliette and Nicky watching me, but I shook my head at them.
They knew I was on the brink of losing it, but I couldn’t talk to them about it here.
I picked apart my napkin and tried to tune them out as they kept talking about the rapist, and the guys expressed their worry for us.
What if Liam hadn’t been there with me? I would’ve been there alone. What if...
What if the rapist wasn’t a stranger? What if he had a creepy smile and cold, black snake eyes and wore a hood or a hat to hide his menacing face?
Breathe in. Breathe out. I couldn’t panic.
Couldn’t accuse a random man of being a rapist. Couldn’t even let Liam know I was thinking it.
When I thought I could talk normally, I looked up from the surprisingly large pile of shredded napkins in front of me.
“Do you think you can get me a description of the guy? The library has so many visitors. I can’t look at all of them as potential rapists. ”
“Don’t you already do that?” Nicky said. I shot her a look. She was right, but I didn’t need her to point it out to Liam. Although, better he thinks that than to know it was only one specific creep I had in mind.