Chapter 52
52
HOPE
Savannah breezes in as I’m dropping my purse into my locker. “Morning!” she sings, then spins toward me, her eyebrows dancing up and down. “How’s lover boy? Have I missed anything this week? Any plans tonight?” When her eyes land on me, all humor vanishes. “You okay, hon?”
Geez, I must look as bad as I feel. I press my hands to my cheeks. “I feel awful. I’ve been sick every day this week, and I’m exhausted from it.” I rub my hand across my stomach, which feels sunken in because I couldn’t face the idea of food this morning.
Her eyebrows draw together in worry. “Have you been to see the doctor? I don’t think the stomach flu usually lasts that long. Should you even be here?”
I raise my hands and drop them again. “Lucy’s away for the weekend, so it’s just you, me, and Sophie today. We’re too busy, we can’t afford for me to take the day off. Hopefully, I’ll feel better in an hour or two, then I’ll eat something.” I hold up the granola bars I brought with me, along with an apple and a bottle of juice. “This’ll help when I can stomach the idea of food.”
She juts her hip out and rests her hand there. “So you wake up feeling sick, then you’re okay by mid-morning?”
I nod. “Yeah, it seems that way.”
“And you’re feeling exhausted?”
“Yeah.” I grab the fresh towels and take my first step toward the front of the salon to set up.
“Any other symptoms?” Savannah asks as she follows me out, turning on the lights.
I rub my hand across my stomach. “I … uh … feel bloated all the time. My zippers on my jeans are harder to pull up.” Even though I’ve barely eaten. It’s so weird.
She nods. “Uh huh.”
I stop in my tracks and spin to face her at the tone of her voice. “What? You sound like you don’t believe me.”
“Oh, I believe you, but I’m wondering why you haven’t thought of the obvious reason you’re feeling this way, because it’s as obvious as a neon sign to me,” she says as she turns on the computer.
I chuckle in confusion as my forehead dampens in response to my stomach rolling again. Before I can ask her what the hell she’s talking about, I make a beeline for the bathroom and get there just in time to be sick.
Savannah’s voice echoes down the hallway as I brush my teeth. “Yeah, can you stop at the drugstore and grab a pregnancy test kit for me?” A pregnancy test? Silence. “Nah, not for me. For Hope. I think she’s pregnant.”
My eyes almost bulge out of my head. Whaaaat?
Savannah giggles. “Yeah, she just told me she’s been sick and exhausted all week. I take a week off work, and this is what I come back to. Why didn’t you guys pick up on the signs? You’ve been pregnant. How did you not put two and two together?”
Another pause as my breathing escalates and my heart trips into my ribs.
“Anyway, can you grab a test? I’ll cover the reception until you get here.”
Music begins to play softly through the speakers, and I wipe my mouth, ensuring there’s no toothpaste left behind, then touch up my makeup with shaky hands. We’ve been using condoms since the first time when we forgot. I couldn’t have possibly gotten pregnant the first time we had sex. Surely not. Oh, shit! I palm my forehead. There was also that night after his parents stopped by. Maybe we haven’t been as careful as we should have.
“Thanks. See you soon.”
I step out of the bathroom on shaky legs to the sound of the bell over the door and Savannah greeting our clients. There’s no time to question her about the phone call—or to organize my thoughts. My mind spins in different directions, but I paste on a smile for my first client of the day.
When Sophie arrives twenty minutes later, she gives me a sheepish smile before disappearing through to the back. The phone rings the second she steps back into the salon, and she answers it efficiently as always, however, I can’t help but wonder if she bought the test and how soon I can pee on the damn stick to find out if what Savannah thinks is true.
She hangs up and comes over to me. “Morning!” she says brightly.
“Morning.” I want to ask her if she bought the test, but I’m doing my best to remain professional when all I want to do is run to the bathroom.
“I put that thing you needed with your stuff,” she whispers with a knowing grin and wide eyes.
I swallow past the sand in my mouth. “Thanks, Soph.”
Holding a mirror up so my client can see the back of his hair, I count down the moments until I can head to the bathroom. The anticipation of learning if I’m pregnant or not is making my skin itch.
“That looks great. Thanks, Hope.” Donovan grins at me in the mirror.
I give him a genuine smile. “You’re welcome.” I brush off some stray hair from his neck. “I’ll see you in six weeks.”
“Yep. I’ll be back,” he says in his best Arnold Schwarzenegger voice as he climbs to his feet, and I chuckle. He has such a great demeanor. I bet all of his elementary students love him.
Glancing at the wall clock, I realize I have five minutes before my next client, so I scurry to the back, grab the test, and close myself in the bathroom. I skim the instructions and get to work. Once I’ve done my business, I wash my hands and wait.
Pacing the bathroom, I press my hand to my stomach as questions stream through my head. He said he wouldn’t mind if I got pregnant. I wonder if he meant that? Or did he say it in the heat of the post-sex high? What would we do? Where would we live? How would Evan feel if I were pregnant? He’s been an only child for so long. How would he adjust? Is this all happening too fast? What if I’m not pregnant?
I glance down at my wedding rings and twist them around my finger. How can I wear these if I’m pregnant with Ben’s baby?
I jump as two sharp raps on the door snap me from my thoughts. I wrench it open to find Sophie and Savannah at the door with expectant looks. “So?”
“I don’t know. I’m too afraid to look.” I realize that, in the time since I overheard Savannah on the phone, hope has grown within me. For as many questions as I have rushing through my mind, there’s joy and excitement too. Hope .
Their eyes soften, and their lips curl into supportive smiles. “I’d have no idea what I’m looking at,” Savannah announces, then nudges Sophie’s arm. “You look.”
Sophie’s startled eyes lock with mine. “I can look, if you want me to.”
I bite my bottom lip, my eyes flicking between the two women. Appreciation grows for their unwavering support. “I’ll look, but will you guys stay while I do?”
They both nod. “Of course. Why in the hell do you think we’re here? I’ve got about a minute and a half before I need to get back out there, so hurry up!” Savannah cries.
I flap my hands and draw in a deep breath. “Okay, okay.” I grab the stick from the counter and glance at the window, spotting two solid dark pink lines. “Oh, my god,” I whisper, shock dripping from the three syllables.
Sophie and Savannah crowd me as they look at the test. “Holy shit. You’re preggers!” Savannah blurts.
I finally peel my eyes away from the test to look at the girls. “We haven’t been as careful as we should. This might be a result of the first time we had sex …” I count in my head. “Five weeks ago. It’s not like we’ve had a lot of opportunities to do the deed.”
Sophie smiles. “I got pregnant the first time I ever had sex.”
Savannah playfully punches her arm. “No way! That’s some bullshit, right there.”
With a nod, Sophie agrees and says, “I know, but I ended up with James, so I’m not complaining. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” I think she says something else, but all I hear is the buzzing in my head and my blood thrumming through my veins.
I’m pregnant .
Something I never thought I’d experience again. I lay my hand across my stomach in awe, knowing there’s a little piece of me and a little piece of Ben in there.
Ben and I are having a baby.
“Shit. I gotta go,” Savannah curses, then wraps her arm around me, hugging me awkwardly in the tight space. “Congrats, momma!” She kisses my cheek and rushes out.
When it’s just Sophie and me, she looks at me cautiously. “What are you gonna do?”
A grin touches my lips. Something that’s been happening a lot lately. “I’m gonna tell Ben tonight after he finishes work.”
“Do you think he’ll be happy?”
I ponder the question, and there’s no doubt in my mind when I finally answer. “Yeah.” My grin is broad and my heart expands as I answer.
She beams and leans in to embrace me. “I’m so happy for you, Hope.”
I suck in a deep breath, feeling the oxygen fill my lungs. “Me too.” And I really am. For the first time in a long time, I’m genuinely happy and looking forward to the future.