Chapter 11
Chapter eleven
Ash’s eyes scanned over the data, searching for any sign their most recent model worked. Over the last few simulations, Ash had finally run successful models. Luke had seen promising results with the biology portion of their research. Ash was proud of the work they’d done and would continue to do.
With every win, they were one step closer to discovering a novel detection method for thyroid cancer.
With every win, they were closer to saving someone from the fate their loved ones faced.
With every win, Ash and Luke celebrated, even if it was just treating themselves to a scone with their afternoon coffee.
If they could wallow in their losses, they should celebrate their wins.
It had been several days since Ash and Luke had seen Jenn at Walmart.
Ash had begun to accept Jenn simply hadn’t noticed anything strange between them.
With each passing day, Ash had relaxed a bit, and they stopped waiting for the other shoe to drop.
At first, they were checking their email every five seconds and jumping at every knock at their door.
But, as the days passed and nothing happened, the anxiety began to slip away.
They’d had a close call, but that was all it was.
Ash rolled their shoulders back as they looked away from their data.
Luke stood, hips resting on the lab bench, inspecting his work.
He squinted and wrote something down in his notebook beside his many calculations and results.
Since they had taken their relationship further, Ash couldn’t get enough of Luke.
Of the way he looked in a lab coat. Of the way his hair curled around the edges of his safety glasses.
With every day, Ash’s feelings for Luke were only getting stronger.
Throughout Ash’s life, they never thought they would find a partner who would truly understand them.
Their love of science had ruined more than one relationship, but Luke got it.
He was just as passionate as Ash. Their idea of sexting was sending research articles back and forth. It was everything Ash had ever wanted.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” Luke asked, putting his pipette down on the lab bench and giving Ash a soft smile.
Ash shook their head. “Sorry, I was zoning out.”
Luke turned to face Ash and leaned his hip on the bench. “What were you thinking about?”
A shy smile turned the corners of Ash’s mouth up. “Just…this,” they said, gesturing between themself and Luke. “How I never could have imagined something so…perfect.”
Luke strode across the lab towards Ash, coming to stop beside their chair. Ash turned to face Luke, looking up into his piercing green eyes. “It is perfect. But what made you think of that?”
Ash’s cheeks burned red hot. “Just… I never imagined I’d have a partner I could talk science with.
Who I could nerd out in front of. I’ve never been able to do that before.
Sometimes, I’d try, and they wouldn’t be interested.
Or I’d never get there because I’d blown off a date while neck-deep in work. ”
“You can always talk science to me, Ash.” Luke’s voice dropped into the deep tone he used when they were alone at night.
Why was that so hot? Ash’s cheeks flushed even warmer. “How close are you to finishing your work for the day?”
“Give me five minutes.”
Luke and Ash worked quickly to finish their tasks before Luke ripped off his lab coat and gloves and nearly dragged Ash out of the lab.
Ash let out a laugh as the door slammed behind them, and Luke wasted no time locking it and rushing down the stairs.
But Ash was surprised when Luke didn’t lead Ash toward the parking lot; instead, he walked further into the building.
“Where are we going?” Ash asked, struggling to keep up with Luke’s long stride.
“My office,” Luke answered, his voice low.
Ash’s heart thrummed in their chest, but not from anxiety. No, they were excited. It was a Sunday, so no one would be in their offices. No students would be milling around. It was the only time Ash and Luke could get away with something like this.
They crossed the threshold into Luke’s office, and Ash only had a second to take in the books and papers haphazardly strewn across the desk before Luke slammed the door shut and pressed Ash against it.
Luke cupped the back of Ash’s neck as he pulled them into a kiss.
Luke’s normally soft kisses were nothing compared to this one.
Ash was set ablaze under Luke’s touch. They threaded their fingers through Luke’s belt loops, pulling his hips to theirs.
Luke let out a throaty groan as he kissed Ash. “Don’t tease me, Ash.”
With a smirk, Ash tugged on Luke’s belt loops again before pressing their lips back to Luke’s.
Luke pulled Ash away from the door, leading them towards his desk.
Before Ash could comment on the clutter, Luke swept away everything from his desk.
All the papers and books scattered to the floor, littering the room.
When Luke turned back to Ash, there was only desire in his gaze.
Luke turned Ash around and pushed them back so they sat on the edge of his desk.
Luke deftly pulled Ash’s shirt off and threw it over his shoulder before pushing Ash’s thighs apart with both hands, stepping between them, and capturing Ash’s lips once again.
Ash worked to unbutton Luke’s blue flannel, their fingers shaking.
They pushed the flannel off Luke’s body, leaving him in only a white t-shirt and jeans.
Luke broke their kiss to reach over his shoulder and pull his t-shirt off, throwing it to the ground.
Ash ran their hands down Luke’s chiseled torso, admiring every sculpted inch of his body.
As Luke pushed Ash down onto the table and began unzipping their jeans, Ash felt their phone vibrate.
There was no way in hell they were answering that.
But when Luke lifted Ash’s hips to pull their jeans off, Ash’s phone fell out of their pocket and onto the ground.
As Luke knelt between Ash’s legs, he glanced down at Ash’s phone and froze immediately.
“What’s wrong?” Ash asked, sitting up.
Luke grabbed Ash’s phone and held it up to them so Ash could scan the email notification on their screen.
Fuck.
Fuck it all to hell.
Ash nearly dropped their phone when they read the email.
The subject alone had their heart wanting to explode in their chest. Ash’s fingers shook as they clicked on the email.
They could barely hear themself think as they read the body.
They had to re-read the same sentence over and over.
It wasn’t sinking in. This wasn’t happening.
Ash,
I think we should talk. Do you have time today? We should get a cup of coffee. I can come by your office in an hour.
Let me know if you’re not available.
Jenn
“Luke…” Ash said. Their voice shook as violently as their hands. Their chest heaved as they were unable to take a full breath.
Luke slid Ash over on the desk so there was space for him to sit and read the email over Ash’s shoulder as Ash searched Luke’s face.
“It doesn’t mean she told the Dean. It probably has nothing to do with our relationship.”
Ash shook their head. They had received many “I think we should talk” emails from Jenn over the years, mostly when Ash was behind on their dissertation work. It meant Jenn wanted to discuss something upsetting.
“No, she wants to talk about this. Maybe she went to the Dean and wanted to give me a heads-up. Or maybe she just wants to tell me I’m playing with fire. But either way, this isn’t good. This is really, really bad.”
“Ash,” Luke said, pulling Ash into his side. “You’re spiraling. You have no idea what she wants. This could be much more innocent than you think.”
Fuck. This couldn’t be happening. This could not be happening.
Ash’s head spun, and they suddenly felt the ground coming toward them.
Ash gripped the edge of the desk and leaned forward, bending their head.
They took slow inhales through their nose and long exhales through their mouth.
Luke rubbed comforting circles on Ash’s back, but all it did was make them more nauseous.
When Ash shook Luke off, they felt momentarily guilty, but only until the nausea subsided.
“What are we going to do?” Ash asked. “This can’t be fucking happening.”
“Ash, you’re getting ahead of yourself. Go see what she wants, and if she is going to tell the Dean, we can figure out a plan.”
“What the hell are we going to do, Luke? What choice do we have?”
“I’ll quit, Ash. I told you I would protect us from this.”
Ash shook their head as they sat up to look Luke in the eye. “I’m not asking you to do that. Maybe if we explain our relationship started before the semester, they won’t care.”
Luke ran a hand through his hair. “I think we should have told them earlier if that was the story we were going to go with.”
“I can’t lose this job, Luke. I can’t. I have student loans, a car payment, an apartment, medical expenses… I need this job,” Ash said. They were rambling. They knew they were.
“I will quit, Ash. I haven’t been happy here for a while now. I had already been applying to other research positions. I have money saved and can go elsewhere.”
It was too much pressure. There was too much riding on this relationship if Ash let Luke quit.
They couldn’t allow that. That would mean they were in a serious relationship.
They’d only been dating a couple of weeks.
Ash couldn’t allow Luke to sacrifice so much for them, despite how they both felt about the relationship.
Ash shook their head. “Let’s see what she says. Then we can make a decision.”
Luke nodded. “Let’s get a snack, and then you can head over to your office.”