Chapter 41
41
DORIE
T he morning of Eliza’s wedding was perfect. The sun was out but not too hot. There were zero clouds, which was a rarity. It was the kind of day that felt like it had been plucked straight out of a fairytale.
For Eliza.
For me, it was hard to feel the magic. The past several days had been a blur of frosting, fondant, and sleepless nights. I’d thrown myself into finishing Eliza’s wedding cake, using it as a distraction from the ache in my chest that hadn’t gone away since Kaisen walked out of my bakery.
Since he shattered my heart into a million pieces. It seemed like overkill. I didn’t understand why he felt like he needed to tell me we were a thing only to dump me a day later. Why couldn’t we have just kept things at arm’s length? Why did he have to make me think there was a real chance we could have something?
I stood in front of the mirror in Eliza’s bridal suite, my hands trembling as I slipped the diamond earrings Kaisen had given me into my ears. They sparkled in the light, a painful reminder of what could have been. I dabbed at my eyes with a tissue, trying to keep my makeup from smudging. Eliza had insisted on hiring a makeup artist to do all of our makeup. I didn’t want to mess up their hard work. Even if it did feel like a bit much. I felt like I should we be walking a red carpet instead of a white aisle runner.
I wasn’t sure why I was still wearing the earrings. Maybe because they were beautiful. Maybe because they felt like a piece of him I wasn’t ready to let go of yet. Or maybe because, deep down, I was still holding on to the hope that this wasn’t really over.
Did I think he was going to look at me and see the earrings and change his mind?
Maybe .
“Dorie, are you ready? We’re leaving for the church in ten minutes.” Eliza pulled me back to the present.
I turned to see her standing in the doorway, her wedding dress billowing around her like a cloud. She looked stunning, radiant, and for a moment, I forgot about my own heartbreak. This was her day, and I wasn’t going to let my sadness ruin it.
“You look amazing,” I said, forcing a smile. “Cullen’s going to lose his mind when he sees you.”
She grinned, spinning in a slow circle. “I know, right? I feel like a princess. Or a cake topper.”
I laughed, though it came out more like a choked sob. Eliza’s smile faded, and she crossed the room to take my hands in hers.
“Hey,” she said softly. “Are you okay? You’ve been crying all morning.”
I shook my head, blinking back tears. “I’m fine. It’s just… my twin sister is getting married. It’s a big deal.”
She studied me for a moment, her eyes narrowing. “Is that really all it is?”
I hesitated, then nodded. “Yeah. That’s all.”
She didn’t look convinced, but she didn’t push it. Instead, she pulled me into a tight hug. “I love you, Dorie. Thank you for being here for me.”
I hugged her back, my throat tight. “I love you too, Eliza. Always.”
She stepped back. “Is this ridiculous?”
“Is what ridiculous?”
“The dress. The big fairytale wedding. Did I go overboard?”
I smiled and forced down my heartbreak to step into my role as her maid of honor. This was the freakout I knew was coming. She’d been doing well, but it was bound to happen eventually.
“Eliza,” I said, taking her by the shoulders and looking her straight in the eyes. “You did not go overboard. This is your day. If you want to walk down the aisle in a dress that could double as a parade float, then you do it. Cullen’s already head over heels for you—he’s not going to care if you show up in a potato sack. But today? You’re a goddess. Own it.”
She let out a shaky laugh, her lower lip trembling. “A parade float? Really?”
“A stunning parade float,” I corrected, squeezing her hands. “Look at you. You’re glowing. And don’t even get me started on this dress. It’s like someone bottled up every romantic dream you’ve ever had and turned it into fabric. It’s perfect. You’re perfect.”
Her eyes welled up, and she quickly blinked back tears. “Don’t make me cry again. The makeup artist left like an hour ago, and I can’t redo this winged eyeliner to save my life.”
I laughed. “You’re not going to cry, Eliza. You’re going to walk down that aisle with your head held high, because you look like absolute royalty, and Cullen is going to take one look at you and forget how to breathe. And then you’ll say your vows, and everyone will cry for you because this wedding is going to be perfect.”
She took a deep breath. “Okay. You’re right. Thank you. I knew I couldn’t do this without you.”
I reached into the small velvet pouch I’d been carrying with me all morning, my fingers brushing against the delicate item inside. She looked calm now, serene even, as if all her earlier nerves had melted away with my pep talk.
“Eliza,” I said softly, pulling her attention back to me. “I have something for you.”
“What is it?”
I held out the pouch, letting it dangle from my fingertips. “Your something blue.”
Her eyes lit up, and she took the pouch carefully, as if it might disappear if she handled it too roughly. She opened it and tipped the contents into her hand—a small blue butterfly pin.
“Dorie,” she whispered, her voice thick with emotion. “It’s beautiful.”
“It goes on your garter.”
“I thought my garter was something blue?” she asked with a smile.
“It was, but this butterfly serves as something borrowed and something blue.”
“You’re going to make me give this back?”
“Do you remember that butterfly?” I asked.
She frowned and studied it before her eyes widened. “No way!” Eliza’s eyes filled with tears as she held the butterfly pin up to the light, her fingers trembling. “Is this… is this really the same one?”
I nodded, my own throat tightening. “It is. The one you gave me in first grade when I was nervous about my first day of school. You said it would give me courage. It was supposed to make me brave.”
She let out a choked laugh, her voice breaking. “Oh my god, Dorie. I can’t believe you kept it all these years. That was when the principal insisted we be split up. That guy was an asshole.”
I laughed. “Of course I kept it,” I said softly, brushing a tear from my cheek. “You told me it would always remind me of you, and it did. Every time I looked at it, I felt like you were there with me, even when we were apart. It’s been my something borrowed for so long—it just felt right that it should be yours today.”
“You have no idea what this means to me. It’s perfect. More than perfect.”
I smiled, though my vision was blurry with unshed tears. “It’s your day, Eliza. And you deserve every bit of magic that comes with it.”
“I love you so much, Dorie,” she whispered. “You’re the best sister anyone could ever have.”
“I love you. Now, let’s get this pinned on and then we have to get out of here. Your husband is waiting.”
The ride to the church was a blur. Eliza and her bridesmaids chattered excitedly, but I barely heard them. My mind was elsewhere, replaying the conversation with Kaisen over and over again. You deserve more than me. His words echoed in my head, a constant reminder of the wall he’d built between us. I didn’t know how to break it down, or if I even should. I didn’t understand how he had gone from hot to cold so quickly. And honestly, I didn’t want to waste another minute trying to figure out what he was doing. He didn’t deserve my time.
When we arrived at the church, I went through the motions of my maid of honor duties, helping Eliza with her dress and making sure everything was in place. But as the wedding party gathered to walk down the aisle, I saw him. Kaisen.
He looked terrible. His tux was rumpled, his hair disheveled, and there were dark circles under his eyes. He looked like he hadn’t slept in days. When his eyes met mine, I felt my heart lurch in my chest. There was so much pain in his gaze, so much regret, and it took everything in me not to go to him, to ask him what was wrong, to tell him we could figure this out.
Why? That was my only question. Why put himself through the misery? And me. Why in the hell were we both suffering?
But now wasn’t the time. This was Eliza’s day, and I wasn’t going to make it about me. I tore my eyes away from Kaisen and focused on Eliza, who was waiting in the wing. I walked over to her, my heels clicking softly against the floor.
“How are you feeling?” I asked quietly.
She smiled, though her hands were trembling. “Nervous. Excited. Mostly just… ready. I’m ready to marry the man of my dreams. I love him and I want to spend every day for the rest of my life telling him.”
“You’re going to be amazing. And Cullen is lucky to have you.”
She looked at me. That one look spoke volumes. We didn’t have twin telepathy, but we had something. “Dorie, Cullen told me about you and Kaisen. I’m so excited for you guys. I mean, I always thought you two would be perfect together.”
I felt my stomach drop, but I forced a smile. “It wasn’t serious,” I said quickly, my voice barely above a whisper. “It was just fun for now.”
Eliza’s smile faded, and she looked at me with something like pity. “Dorie…”
I shook my head, cutting her off. “It’s fine, Eliza. Really. Today’s about you, okay? Let’s not worry about me.”
She hesitated, then nodded. “Okay. But if you need to talk, I’m here.”
I nodded, though I knew I wouldn’t take her up on it. Not today. The music began to play, signaling the start of the ceremony. I took a deep breath, steeling myself for what was coming next. I was going to have come face to face with the man that broke my heart.
“It’s time,” I said, giving Eliza’s hand one last squeeze. “You’ve got this.”
She smiled, her eyes shining with tears. “Thank you, Dorie. For everything.”
I walked to take my place beside Kaisen. My heart was pounding as I walked over to him, my eyes fixed on the floor. I couldn’t look at him, not right now. If I did, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to keep it together.
“Dorie,” he said softly as I reached his side. His voice was rough, like he hadn’t used it in days.
I didn’t respond. I couldn’t. Instead, I took my place beside him, my hands clasped tightly on the bouquet, and stared straight ahead. The music swelled, and the wedding party began to walk down the aisle. I kept my eyes forward, my chin held high, but I could feel Kaisen’s gaze on me, heavy and full of unspoken words.