Chapter Twenty
I propped a shoulder against the bedroom doorway the next morning, watching him pack for his business trip. Cam had always been methodical, right down to how he folded his dress pants, crisp and perfect, before laying them into the open suitcase.
“Is this meeting a big deal?” I asked, voice soft.
He nodded, grabbing his favorite navy shirt and smoothing it over the edge of the bed before packing it away. “There’s a good bit of money riding on it.”
“I hope it goes well for you,” I said. And I meant it. Cam was good at his job; he thrived on competition, the chase. “Just try not to gamble all our money away while you’re there.”
He looked up, lips quirking. “If you kiss me before I leave, I’ll be bound to win.”
I blew him an exaggerated kiss and bounded down the stairs, the scent of baking chocolate wafting up to meet me like a warm blanket.
Maybe Cam complained, but making those chocolate chip muffins had become my morning ritual—and I couldn’t disappoint Mr. Porter, even if he only got to the bookstore on special days.
I opened the oven and let the sweet, melty smell fill the kitchen, mixing with the rich aroma of fresh coffee. I felt instantly more relaxed.
“Smells fabulous,” Cam said, rolling his suitcase to the door and striding over with a glint in his eye.
I recognized his swagger even before he reached for me, pulling me close for a kiss that tasted of mint toothpaste and promise. I melted into it, letting last night’s frustration slip away, just for a moment. I wouldn’t see him all weekend. No point in dragging old arguments with us.
I was still mad—but loving him was a muscle memory, something automatic, something that hurt more when I tried to resist. Easier just to give in and let the moment take over.
So when he pressed himself against me and I felt the unmistakable hardness beneath his pants, I didn’t protest. I moaned softly as his hand found its way under my dress, his fingers teasing and insistent.
It wasn’t long before I was breathless, gripping his bulge through thin fabric with eager hands.
“Give me something to get me through this weekend without you, Livi.”
He yanked my panties down, spun me around, and bent me over the breakfast bar. The sound of his zipper was the only warning before he slid inside me, rough and hungry.
I was ready for him, needing him even as each thrust drove my hips into the unforgiving edge of the counter. His fist twisted in my hair, pulling my head back so my spine arched for him. I barely registered pain—all of it drowned under the rush of pleasure as he filled me again and again.
He palmed my breast through my dress and squeezed, his chest pressing against my back.
“Nothing is better than this,” he growled, breath hot against my ear. “Nothing is better than knowing you’re mine and mine alone.”
I almost laughed at the irony, but it was lost in the heat of the moment, in the rhythm of his movements and the flood roaring in my veins.
He spun me around and lifted me onto the bar. I gasped, the cool marble hard against my skin, but he didn’t give me time to adjust before peeling my neckline down and biting my nipple, sharp and possessive.
Legs wrapped around his waist, I clung to him. He bore down until my back hit the countertop. Both hands pinned my wrists as he plunged into me, over and over, filling every part of me.
He knew exactly how to touch me; the second his thumb pressed against my clit, I shattered around him, my back bowing, voice breaking in a cry I barely recognized.
He roared my name as he came, holding himself deep, his body shuddering against mine. I felt every throb, every twitch, all of him pouring into me.
We clung together, breath coming hot and uneven, neither of us willing to be the first to move. I couldn’t imagine feeling this with anyone else. Ever.
How could anyone else ever make me forget this connection? Two hearts, locked in a battle, refusing to let go.
Finally, he pulled out, gentle now, and lifted me off the counter, wrapping me in a soft kiss before whispering, “I love you.” He said it like it was an oath. He knew I was powerless to resist.
∞∞∞
“Was everything okay last night?” Nate asked that morning as I frothed milk for the first latte order.
“Yes. No emergency. He just came home early and was surprised I wasn’t there waiting for him.”
Nate snorted. “So not only does he cheat on you, but he expects you to sit by the door every night, just in case he’s bored and wants your company?”
I went still. That was the first time I’d ever heard Nate sound bitter. He’d always skirted around direct criticism of Cam, even though I knew he didn’t like our arrangement.
He shook his head. “Sorry. That was rude. I just hate that you have to go through all this. Or that you think you have to.”
I focused on the swirl of milk and coffee, watching them dance together in the cup.
“I don’t think I have to. I just—I can’t stand the thought of living without him.
” I watched the colors blend. “I know you don’t get it.
Most people wouldn’t. But I think we’re soulmates. We operate on a higher frequency.”
The look Nate gave me said it all. I barked out a laugh. “Told you. You don’t buy it.”
He popped a lid on the cup and pushed it back across the counter. “I just think if you were really soulmates—if he loved you the way you love him—it wouldn’t be possible for him to hurt you this much. I know I wouldn’t if you were mine.”
I rolled my eyes and walked the cup over to the waiting customer. “Thanks for coming in,” I called with a bright, practiced smile.
Nate leaned over the counter as soon as I returned. “You hate me now, don’t you?” he asked, voice low. “Especially after last night.”
“No,” I said.
“Do you regret what almost happened?”
I shook my head. “I regret not stopping it sooner. I should have. But I wouldn’t have let it go too far, anyway.”
He raised a skeptical brow at that. “Really, Livi? You forget I was right there. You were just as into it as I was.”
I exhaled, relieved to see another customer walk in at that exact moment.
“Welcome to Timeless Treasures!” I called, grateful for the distraction.
When the rush faded, I turned back. “I was into it,” I admitted under my breath. “And I know I didn’t do anything wrong. But I’m not ready to sleep with someone else right now. I’m still too stuck on my husband.”
“Just promise you won’t disappear on me,” he said, voice warm and pleading. “The idea of never kissing you again honestly makes me sick.”
“I won’t,” I answered softly. “I like being with you. But I’m not ready for more.”
He nodded, understanding flickering in his blue eyes. “Understood.”
“And you have to know once Cam calls it off with the other women, we go back to just being friends. That’s the deal.”
He gave a mock salute. “Friends it is, as long as you promise not to ditch me completely. Now kiss me.”
I laughed and shoved his shoulder. “Go stock the shelves or something. You’re a bad influence.”
His laughter followed as he sauntered away.
∞∞∞
Later, I sank into the hot water, the bubbles soft around my skin and the steam curling up beneath my chin. A glass of cheap white wine dangled from my hand, and I let the sweet, floral scent of my bath soak lull me into a trance.
I’d always hated it when Cam was gone overnight. The house felt less like a home and more like a big, echoing cave. It was funny—noticing every creak and thump only when I knew he wasn’t coming back that night.
My phone pinged, cutting through the quiet. I wiped my hand and checked the screen.
Just got my hotel room, baby. I miss you already.
Miss you too, babe. Have fun in the casino tonight. But not too much fun!
I’d tried to make plans with Rachel, but she was off with Jackson, meeting his family for the weekend. At this point, I doubted she wanted to call it a relationship, but that’s what it was.
Another ping, before I could set down my glass:
There’s a county fair happening just outside the city this weekend. Any chance you’d want to go tomorrow? Since Cam’s out of town and all.
I stared at the text, mind spinning. The last thing I should do was spend Saturday night at a fair with Nate.
But the other option was sitting here alone, counting the way the shadows grew on the walls. I didn’t want to cross any boundaries, but this thing with Nate—it was like trying to hold water in my hands. The lines kept shifting.
I took a deep breath and typed out my answer.
I’ll go as long as you understand that we have to remain friendly only. I can’t hold Cam to the rules if I’m not following them myself and that restricts any kissing or overly friendly activities to Thursdays only.
I grudgingly accept your terms. Pick you up at four?
Can’t wait.
I slid down until the water covered my ears, shutting out the world, wondering if I was making a huge mistake.
∞∞∞
Nate drove like he was hunting for prey, circling the parking lots for nearly half an hour before finally finding a space near the back.
By the time we finally stepped out, I was more than ready to stretch my legs. It hadn’t been a long drive, but something about being in his car made time move slower.
We had a long walk to the main gates, the grounds loud with early evening energy. I silently thanked myself for wearing sneakers instead of something fancier.
“I wish I could hold your hand,” Nate said, grinning at me as the crowd jostled past. “This feels like a high school date.”
I laughed. “Just friends tonight, remember?”
He sighed theatrically. “I know. But it’s going to be tough, Livi. Just so you know.”
I nudged his arm. “Same for me.” Then I stopped, turning serious. “Nate—I don’t know what’s happening here, but it scares me. I’ve never been attracted to anyone except Cam. Not ever. He was my first everything. You and me? This feels dangerous. I have no idea what I’m doing.”