Chapter 34
Layla
BELLA
on my way over
you should have told me you weren’t feeling well
Cindy’s coming down with a cold too and can’t make it
it’s going around
I bet it’s nothing to worry about Lil
LAYLA
I hope so
you aren’t scared of getting sick?
BELLA
no, we’re due for a best friend night
plus you know me, immune system of steel
LAYLA
wish you could give me some of that
BELLA
I’d give it to you in a heartbeat if I could
Kieran is domesticated.
Emmy is snuggled up beside me, one of her many books in her lap. Trust me, the book lover in me is screaming—I should be reading to her, should be engaging—but I find I can’t take my eyes off Kieran.
He whistles and sings to himself, music softly playing from his phone as he moves around the kitchen like he knows every nook and cranny.
Why is he taking care of me?
This isn’t the typical concerned employer—this is more. The man in the kitchen fretting over making me a bowl of chicken noodle soup, the one that gently handed me a steaming mug of honey and lemon tea, is not the playboy I read about on the bunny sites last year.
This is the true Kieran Ashford; this is his heart and soul on display.
I just don’t know what I did to be lucky enough to see it.
The front door bangs open, startling Emmy for a moment before a loud bark rings out. Book suddenly forgotten, Emmy launches off the couch, squealing. “Bambi!”
Bella rounds the corner, her jaw practically unhinged at hearing Emmy’s voice.
Kieran frowns as he walks over, gently handing me a bowl of chicken noodle soup that smells divine. His fingers brush my hand as he moves away.
“Ever heard of knocking?” Kieran calls out.
Grayson snorts. “Payback time, buddy. I’m going to make your life a living hell with next door to me.” He clicks his tongue. “You seem to forget I have cameras. I know you still sneak over and steal Bella’s cooking.”
I gasp, turning. “Kieran!”
He shrugs sheepishly. “What? They’re really good blueberry muffins.”
Bella just rolls her eyes, beelining for me as Bambi and Emmy take off upstairs. She sits beside me, careful not to jostle the food in my lap as she wraps an arm around my shoulder. “How are you feeling, Lil?”
Tipping my head side to side, my lips purse. “Not the best.” Sighing I confess, “I think it’s taking a toll on me emotionally more than physically. I haven’t had to cancel plans in so long it scared me that I was relapsing.”
More than scared.
I’ve spent the entire day with my chest so tight I felt on the verge of passing out.
My phone was practically glued to my hands, Google open.
I’m never letting those searches see the light of day.
If Kieran and Bella knew the extent of what runs through my mind when I’m feeling off, they would drag me to see a psychologist and beg them to help me.
When you spend years searching for answers, you learn anything is possible. Your sore throat could actually be an early symptom of cancer. The sudden migraines could be a mass on your brain. The lethargy might actually be a parasite riddling your body.
It’s easy to imagine the worst when you’ve already been dealt something horrific. If something rare happened once, then it could happen again.
Bella tucks a stray lock of hair behind my ear as she gets comfortable beside me. “Well, lucky for you, no plans have been canceled, only altered.” She holds up the bag in her hand. “Got all your favorites. Chips, candy, and most importantly…”
Gasping, I snap upright. “Are we watching The Vampire Diaries?”
She laughs. “Just one look and you knew! Yes, I’ll watch it with you.”
I point an accusatory finger at her. “From season two.”
“Yes, yes, from season two, where Damon’s cockiness is more appreciated.”
I sigh dreamily. “I love that man.”
“Who do you love?” a deep voice asks behind me.
Kieran appears, frowning down at me as if I just killed his cat. Or ran over his heart.
Bella smirks. “Layla’s first love, Damon Salvatore.”
That does nothing to alleviate the worry etched across his features. If anything, his frown deepens.
Reaching over, I pat his hand. “He’s a fictional man.”
“Fictional,” Bella snorts.
“What? He is!”
Kieran moves the conversation away as he takes the bag from Bella’s side, ignoring her protests as he rifles through it. “All your favorites?” he asks.
I nod, not entirely sure why my blood hums as he seemingly catalogues each item to memory.
“Might not go down too well with that healthy concoction,” Bella teases, taking a whiff of the bowl. “Please tell me you have more. It smells amazing.”
“There’s plenty on the stove.”
Kieran barely finishes his sentence before Bella’s up and off the couch, heading for the kitchen. “Why the hell are you always stealing my food when you can cook?” she yells as she serves herself a bowl.
Because he likes food made by his loved ones, I think to myself, our conversation coming to mind. Dropping my head back, I find his eyes already on me. “Why do you hide that you can cook from everyone?” I whisper, quiet enough so no one else hears.
Kieran drops the bag beside me and places his forearms on the back of the couch, bending forward enough to brush his lips across the shell of my ear. “Want that answer, sunshine? You’ll have to cough up another one of those spicy books of yours.”
My swallow is audible and suddenly I’m extremely grateful that Grayson joined Bella in the kitchen. My cheeks flush. “Y-you read the chapter?”
“Every word.”
My breath hitches.
Kieran’s warm hand reaches out and cups my jaw, tipping my head back even further so his lips are a hair’s breadth from mine. “I know exactly what you want,” he whispers.
“And what’s that?” I find myself asking, my gaze dropping to his lips as they twitch.
“I think it’s better to show you rather than tell.”
Kieran’s lips brush against mine ever so softly and a zap of electricity passes through me. I gasp. Kieran’s just as shocked, yet it only startles him momentarily.
Quickly pulling away, he turns to Grayson and Bella kissing in the kitchen. He whistles. “Pack it up, lover boy.”
Grayson comes up with a dopey smile. “Go get Emmy in the car and I’ll meet you there. I need to say goodbye to my girl.”
Without another word, he spins and resumes kissing Bella like it’s the last time he’ll taste her. I should be laughing or teasing my best friend but I’m still reeling from my moment with Kieran.
His lips barely brushed mine and it felt like I was electrocuted.
Kieran walks past and winks. “Got a bit of drool on your chin, Carson.”
That snaps me out of my haze.
Shooting daggers at him, I throw it right back. “Pants looking a bit tight, Ashford.”
He stops suddenly, his full attention on me now, and mouths, Always around you.
As it turns out, it took a lot longer for the men to leave.
Emmy had a complete meltdown about leaving Bambi.
I shouldn’t find it funny but watching Kieran try and soothe the absolute hurricane that was Emmy, all while the golden just sat there smiling like it was the best day of her life, was hilarious. Bella and I couldn’t stop laughing.
Kieran will need the patience of a saint because little Emmy might just be as stubborn as her father.
Thirty minutes later, and more bribes than I could count, they decided to compromise…and when I say compromise, I mean they took Bambi with them.
Emmy has Kieran wrapped around her little finger.
Bella flops beside me, opening a packet of chips. “Looks like it really is just us tonight now.”
Nestling into the couch, I feel at ease as she turns on The Vampire Diaries, season two.
“How are you feeling, Lil?”
“Better now that you’re here.”
She’s pensive, her lips tightening before she blurts out, “You’d tell me, wouldn’t you? If you thought you were relapsing?”
I give her a soft smile. “You’d be the first person I’d call.”
Something shifts on her face. Relief, perhaps? The emotion is there and gone before I can decipher it. Sighing suddenly, she returns her gaze to the TV. “I needed this.”
“Me too,” I say softly. “Are Allie and Carlton still staying at the house?”
What a silly question to ask, though. Allie hasn’t been here in a few days and when she’s in town, she’s here every day, joining Emmy and me on our park adventures or even sometimes just coming in to help with cleaning and laundry.
She is an angel, one that has also roped my mother into a friendship. Those two have begun talking more than I talk to my mother, and that’s saying something. If my mom is laughing, it’s because she’s on the phone with Allie.
Bella shakes her head as the telltale sound of the intro starts.
“They left a couple of days ago.” She leans over and takes my hand in hers, squeezing.
“That bear, Lil…I can’t begin to describe how it’s gotten me through those hard moments of missing my mom.
” She pauses, her voice soft. “It revives me when I feel like I’m drowning. ”
Squeezing her hand back, I whisper, “I’m glad.”
A weighted pause fills the room.
“I miss her,” she says finally, her lip quivering.
“I know, B.”
“Did you know I still try to call her sometimes?” she confesses, the first tear rolling down her cheek. “Sometimes I forget she’s—”
Bella stops abruptly, not able to finish her sentence. Tears spring into my eyes, too, at seeing my best friend’s grief.
“I’m sorry, B. I wish I could take your suffering away from you. I wish I could give you more time with her.”
She swallows thickly, nodding as she stares off at nothing before seeming to shake herself out of it.
“God, you forced me to watch this so often in middle school.”
Letting Bella change the subject, I snort. “I would bribe you with sketchpads and pencils.”
Her eyes widen. “Oh my god, you did!” She cackles. “I forgot about that.”
Laughing along with her, we fall into a comfortable silence as the TV show plays. I only get halfway through an episode before the fatigue overpowers me, submerging me in sleep.