Chapter 7 #2
‘Geez, you need a distraction,’ Sadie says, her eyes sweeping over me. ‘Come on Lottie, let’s see if we can turn Aunt Tay-Tay’s frown upside down.’
My niece studies me, her little frown rivalling a bulldog’s. ‘Are you sad, Aunt Tay-Tay?’
‘No. No, of course not,’ I blurt. And it’s the truth. I’m not sad, I’m worried. And until I can speak to a certain AWOL giant, I’ll remain that way. ‘But I do need to make sure everything’s in hand for tonight’s firepit fun.’
‘That’s what the wedding planner is here for, Tay.’
‘And as your big sister, I’m here to oversee them.’
‘Big sister? Control freak, more like.’
‘Sadie!’ I bat her softly on the arm as I rise, and she just laughs.
‘You can’t deny it though, can you?’
I don’t know. The past twenty-four hours with Axel, I’ve been anything but…
‘That depends; are you insulting me?’
‘Never.’ Her face sobers a little. ‘So long as you promise you’re really okay?’
‘Of course I’m okay. You’re happy. Lottie’s happy. So I’m happy.’ I smile, cracking my face in two. ‘You make the most beautiful bride, you know that, right? And I couldn’t be happier for you; I mean that.’
I hug her, then dip to kiss Lottie’s curls. ‘And you, you’re staying with me tonight, so I expect to hear all about Mr Pinchy’s adventures at bedtime.’
She gives me a toothy grin. ‘I’ll bwing my bucket.’
‘You do that.’
‘Thank you, Tay,’ Sadie says, bridal glow returning – thank heaven.
‘Any time.’
I slip my shades back on as I cut across the beach towards the path that winds back up to the old stone villa: the same path Axel appeared on last night.
Before I turned our lives upside down.
Before he stuck us in a blender and whizzed us up into something unrecognisable.
Though I know I’m just as much to blame. I could have said no.
If only I could go back and change it.
And change which bit, exactly? The baby request? The sex?
I don’t know, but the idea of forgoing what we shared – how he looked at me, what he said, how he made me feel – leaves me more bereft than his absence now.
I wrap my hand around my wrist, thumbing the faint red line as I walk. I’m just overthinking it. Everything is fine. Axel is fine.
The pool terrace opens up ahead and I breathe in the quiet, the low buzz of cicadas, the rush of waves through the rustling trees. Perhaps I should take a swim, cool off in the water, then see if—
A shadow shifts to my left and my body reacts before my brain can catch up. Heart slamming. Throat closing.
Axel.
He’s leaning into the sun-bleached wall of the pool house, black trunks clinging to his quads, hair and body dripping from a swim. One hand braced above his head, the other holding a bottle of water as he stares at the ground, shoulders heaving like he’s run a marathon.
Then he shifts, his head tilting, his eyes finding mine and his entire body stiffens. Every muscle straining as his gaze burns me to the ground.
Fuck.
Well, don’t just stand there. Speak to him! Fix it!
I force my feet to close the distance, my voice to work, my body to chill…
‘Hey… you missed breakfast.’
Stating the obvious, much?
I scratch at a non-existent itch behind my ear and smile. Wide.
He pushes off the wall slowly, his eyes never leaving mine. ‘I know.’
I swear, even through my shades, he sees me. Like really sees me. Along with every X-rated thought inspired by his mostly naked state.
Damn. The man really is a god.
Hell, he was always this way. He hasn’t changed; it’s me that’s undergone some crazy switch-up. And that is his fault.
Yeah, you keep telling yourself that.
‘Not hungry?’ I squeak out. Jesus, get a grip.
Something flickers in his eyes. Something dark and fierce and it sends a stream of thrilling-hot butterflies through my stomach. The twist to his lips and his silence even more so. Who needs words when you have eyes that talk like his?
He swaps the water for a towel off a lounger and rubs it over his face and hair. I try not to stare. Try and fail. Because those inked muscles, rippling up close… Yeah, I reckon even a nun would struggle not to ogle.
‘You should know…’ I swallow down the heat and force my eyes back to his. ‘Theo’s looking for you.’
‘What for?’ He throws the towel aside with a frown.
‘I think he’s worried you’ve done a runner now you’ve tossed the rings over…’
And fucked your best mate.
Oh no, that’s just me.
‘Is that what you’d like me to do?’ His eyes flash. ‘Leave?’
‘No. God no!’ I drag in a breath. ‘Why would you think that?’
Damn stupid question, Tay.
The silence stretches. Thick and loaded. Both of us reliving last night. Both of us wondering what the hell happens now. Neither of us saying it.
Until I can’t stand it any more.
‘I figured maybe you needed space,’ I say. ‘Or maybe… maybe you’d changed your mind about what we agreed…?’
His eyes don’t ease; neither does my heart that’s getting faster by the second.
‘Have you?’
He takes a single step closer as he asks, and my heart gallops into the stratosphere. I open my mouth. Close it. Open. Nothing.
Where the hell is my famed nerve when I need it?
Burnt to smithereens, clearly. By him.
He reaches out and my breath slips past my lips, failing to return as he removes my shades. The sun is blinding, but not as blinding as the man stepping into its path. Dark brows knitted, wet lashes heavy, and his eyes… Fuck, those eyes.
‘Words, Tay. I need words.’
Holy crap.
‘No.’ It pulses out of me.
His brow quirks. ‘No?’
‘No, I haven’t changed my mind,’ I breathe.
Because I haven’t. I still want a baby. And… so help me, God, I still want him. With a thirst no amount of denial or fear can drown. And it wasn’t supposed to go like this. It was supposed to be a known quantity. Axel was supposed to be a known quantity. Safe. Easy. Contained.
Okay, not contained in the physical sense. No man or woman could contain a guy like him. But the feeling inside me, that should be containable. Instead, it’s running wild. My blood racing with it, my heart too.
Because the moment he looked at me that way – the way he’s looking at me right now – those eyes I’ve known forever but not like this… He didn’t just gift me the answer I wanted; he inspired a need so fierce, I don’t know how to kill it off. Unless…
‘Have you?’ I blink up at him. ‘Have you changed your mind?’
Axel
Changed my mind?
Is she for fucking real?
I’m out here, punishing myself with exercise, doing everything I can to exhaust the fire in my veins. Because I can’t stop thinking about her. About it.
And now she’s stood before me in a skimpy black bikini, a draped white cover-up that hides sweet FA, and a frown that plumps her blood-red lips like they weren’t already impossible to ignore.
And the only thing I can think of doing is—
‘Axel?’
Fuck it!
I toss her shades onto my towel and tug her flush to me. Her hat hits the deck. Her gasp sweeps across my mouth. And damn, I could kiss her right now.
But then what would be left? Nothing.
Not of the line, and not of me.
‘Do I feel like I’ve changed my mind?’
I know she can feel me against her belly, getting harder by the second. Her sun-kissed skin burns through her non-existent clothing, her tropical scent lifting as she shakes her head, eyes wild and on fire.
‘That’s right, Baby Girl.’
And I’m this close to taking her.
We’re in the open, anyone could see, and I couldn’t give a toss. All I want is her wrapped around me again, crying out my name.
And you want to see how long this lasts when she witnesses their horror?
If it’s Theo, or Sadie… and you haven’t even discussed who gets to know about the donor deal; you’re too busy wanting to fuck her senseless.
Though not busy enough.
With a growl, I grab her by the thighs and lift her against me. She doesn’t fight, she clings, and I fucking love it.
I stride for the pool house and kick open the door. The second it swings shut, we’re shrouded in semi-darkness and I have her thrust up against a unit, arse planted, bikini top untied.
‘Quick, quick, quick,’ she hurries out, hooking her feet into my shorts and shoving them down. And I’m already at her chest, desperate hands groping, hungry mouth feasting.
Jesus, she tastes even better than I remember. Sun-warmed flesh. Hot, taut, ripe for me. I graze her nipple with my teeth, and she lets out a cry that ricochets off the tile. Heat streaks to the head of my cock while sense has me clamping a hand over her mouth.
She bites into my palm, and I grin around her breast; that’s my girl.
I slip my fingers inside her bottoms, watch her eyes glaze over as I stroke through her soaking wet seam. She’s so needy, so eager, so ready for me. And I’m losing it with her. Pre-cum beading as she pants against my hand, breaths rising fast, cries deliciously smothered.
She reaches for my cock and I jerk back.
‘No,’ I bite out, catching her hand and pinning it above her head. I drag the other up to join it. Lock both wrists to the wall with one fist and let my knuckles trail down her front.
I don’t like being touched. And she knows it.
But with her, it ain’t about dislike.
It’s about wanting it too damn much.
Wanting it enough to lose control.
And I can’t lose control. Not to anyone. But especially, not to her.
‘Please,’ she begs.
I tug the ties of her bottoms undone and flick the skimpy fabric aside.
‘Please what?’ I say, easing the thick head of my cock through her slick folds. ‘Words, Baby Girl, tell me what you need?’
‘You,’ she pants, cheeks turning pink. ‘I need you.’
I hitch my cock at her entrance, tease it around my very tip.
‘Now, Ax! Plea—’
Her voice breaks as I thrust inside her, head rocking back, pussy clenching tight.
‘Fuck, you feel so good,’ I grind out, my eyes threatening to roll back in my head, heat firing up my spine. Too quick. Too soon.
I hold still and take a breath, clawing for sanity.
‘So fucking good,’ I stress, pulling all the way out just so I can slam back in.
Her moan rips through the room. Her wrists strain against my grip.
‘You need something to bite.’