23. Finn
Finn
“ A re there other types of supes?” Chester asked.
“There are,” I said. “There are different types of shifters for a start. Reid’s clan shift into jaguars.”
“Jaguars,” Chester murmured, his eyes distant. “The man who came into the shop—that’s what he shifts into?”
“Aye. And he is Reid’s father. Supes stop ageing when we hit our mid-thirties.”
“Wait, so how old are you exactly?”
I held his gaze as I answered.“Four hundred and thirty-three.”
Chester made a noise that was half wheeze and half laugh. “Same age as me then…give or take a few centuries. Does that mean you’re immortal?”
I shrugged. “As much as any supe. I can be killed, but most of the time I reincarnate.”
“You what ? Who are you—Jesus?”
“Fuck no.” I snorted. “Definitely not saintly enough for that. Mind you, I know several angels who are more sinner than saint, so I’m not sure that matters. ”
“You come back to life,” Chester said, bringing us back on topic. “But there’s a chance you might not?”
“If I’m killed by a more powerful being, then yes.” I reached out to smooth away Chester’s frown lines. “Hasn’t happened yet though, m’eudail, and it’s not something you need to worry about. Trust me, I’m more than capable of handling myself.”
“If you say so.” Doubt filled Chester’s voice, and my heart warmed at the fact he was worried about me. That had to be a good sign, right? “How did Evan know for certain it was Reid’s father?”
“From the card he left. His scent was all over the shop, but strongest there given he touched it. Evan’s met him before and recognised his scent immediately.”
Understanding dawned. “That’s why you were both sniffing the card. Not gonna lie, I thought that was a bit weird.”
My little finger crept over his until they were hooked together. “Scent is a potent sense for any supe, but shifters in particular. I think it’s connected to our animal halves.”
Chester tilted his head to the side inquisitively. “What do I smell like to you?”
“Like the loch.”
His nose wrinkled. “Ouch. That’s definitely not appealing.”
“It is to me.” I paused, trying to organise my thoughts in a way that Chester would understand.
“You smell like the trees surrounding it. The clear air so far from any city. The earthy soil that makes up its banks. This loch…it’s always been special to me.
It’s where I go when I’m upset, whenever I feel as though I’m unravelling.
Something about this place…it puts me back together.
It feels like home. Like where I’m supposed to be. ”
“This loch?”
I hesitated before deciding to go all in. “Specifically, this spot. Before your house was built, this was where I’d come. The place I’d sit. Cry. Scream. Being here, it gave me a sense of calm. I’ve never experienced anywhere else like it. It was my sanctuary.”
“But then this house was built and you couldn’t come to this spot anymore?”
I nodded. “The loch was still my refuge, but it wasn’t the same. Not until you arrived, anyway.”
Chester’s throat bobbed. “And that’s what I smell like to you?”
“It is.” I slid my hand fully over his. “You smell like my refuge. My sanctuary.”
I stopped myself before adding the final one. My home. I thought he knew anyway though, from how his skin flushed.
“This is a lot,” he murmured. His hand twitched under mine, and for a heart-stopping moment, I thought he was going to pull away. But his hand relaxed and he continued speaking. “Is this some weird wolf thing? Are you going to tell me next that I’m your mate or something?”
He gave a disbelieving laugh before I could answer him. “God, I can’t believe I’m even asking that. What the fuck is happening?”
“It is a lot,” I said, keeping my voice calm and steady. Chester was exploring uncharted waters with all of this. Waters the rest of humanity would never even know existed, let alone immerse themselves in. I wanted him to know I was his safe port. His refuge.
“Yer not my mate,” I said, ignoring how my wolf bristled and growled. “Wolves don’t have fated mates, we have chosen ones. Don’t worry, I’ve not made any type of claim on you.”
Fear flickered over his face. “But do you want to?”
I lifted his hand and pressed a kiss to it. “I want to date ye, Chester. To get to know you better. If that ends with us being mated, then I’d be thrilled. If it doesn’t, I’ll get over it.”
Liar . My wolf snarled, but I ignored him. If Chester decided he didn’t want to be with me, I’d find a way to deal with it. It was my problem, not Chester’s.
“Okay.” Chester blew out a breath and gave me a sheepish grin. “Sorry, you probably think I’m being ridiculous.”
“Nope.” I kissed his hand again, unable to stop myself. “I think you’ve been through a lot of hurt and it’s understandably made you cautious.”
“I do…” He swallowed and tried again. “I do like you. A lot, if I’m being honest.”
“Good.” Chester liked and cared for me. It wasn’t everything, but it was a start. A start I’d cling to until it was dragged from my claws. “Is there anything else you want to know?”
“Um…” He looked up at the ceiling. “You said there are more supes. Is that just shifters or are there others?”
“Lots of others. Most mythical creatures actually exist. Demons, angels, vampires, witches, mages…I’ve even heard rumours of a kraken, but I’m not sure I believe that. The demon who told me about it isn’t the most reliable storyteller.”
“Demon?” Chester said faintly.
I grinned at him. “Aye, but don’t worry. Despite their reputation, a lot of them aren’t that bad. Same goes for most supes. ”
“Even vampires?”
“Well, there’s one I’ve met who’s a bit of a prick, but he’s mated and settled now. From what Danny’s told me, he’s been more tolerable to be around since.”
“Who’s Danny?”
The question caught me off guard momentarily. How had I not told him about Danny? It was like Chester had suddenly held up a mirror to our reality. For everything I knew about him, he truly didn’t know much about me. It was no wonder he was reluctant to take things further.
“Danny is my alpha,” I said. “Technically he’s the leader of our clan, but in name only. There was an incident last year that led to him parting ways with us permanently. He lives down in Southampton now, with his mate, Riley.”
“Right near where I used to live. Small world.”
“It is.” I sighed. “Part of me wishes I’d visited Dannydown there. Maybe I would’ve met ye sooner.”
He shrugged. “I doubt it. Matt didn’t like to go into Southampton—something about a troublesome ex. Although, knowing what I do now, I suspect it was the other way around.
“Even if we had met, it wouldn’t have mattered,” Chester continued quietly. “I was too wrapped up in Matt and his needs to realise anything else existed.”
My wolf howled inside, but I didn’t let anything other than mild empathy show outwardly. “I’m glad yer away from him now.”
Chester met my gaze and smiled. “Me too.” He nodded towards the pillows. “Would you object to us getting more comfortable? I’m not ready to stop talking, but my body is ready to be horizontal.”
“Of course.”
When we were both lying on our sides, facing each other, Chester asked his next question. “Who leads the clan now that Danny has left?”
“Ah. That’d be me.”
Chester’s lips curled into a grin. “You?”
I narrowed my eyes playfully. “What are ye saying, Chester? Am I not scary enough to lead a clan? Not organised enough? Not powerful enough?”
“It’s not that.” Chester was desperately trying not to laugh. “But you have spent many days and nights lying on my floor pretending to be a dog. Forgive me, but that doesn’t exactly scream leader .”
My heart swelled at his teasing, but before I could banter back, he was shrinking away from me. His hand shot over his mouth as all the colour drained from his face.
What the fuck?
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I shouldn’t have made fun of you. Fuck. I’m so sorry. Please don’t hate me.”
“What?” I reached out to touch his cheek, but he flinched away from my touch. “M’eudail, I could never hate ye. It was funny.”
Chester bit his lip. “Are you sure?”
“Positive.” Acting on instinct, I sat up a bit and slid a hand under his shoulder. “Come here.”
With a bit of wriggling, I had Chester under my arm and against my side. His cheek rested on my pec, his hand splayed on my stomach. Pressed against me, he finally relaxed once more.
“It was hilarious,” I said, kissing the top of his head. “But if ye could avoid mentioning it to Logan, I’d be forever grateful.”
“Would he give you shit for it?”
“Like you wouldn’t believe.” Chester’s fingers were toying with my happy trail and making it hard for me to concentrate. “Pretending to be a dog would be seen as demeaning.”
Chester lifted his head to look at me. “Then why did you do it?”
“You know why.” I stroked his face. “To get closer to ye.”
He was quiet for so long I wondered if he’d fallen asleep, but when I glanced down, it was to find solemn eyes watching me.
“What?” I asked.
“Nothing,” Chester said, a small smile playing on his lips. “Just thinking how lucky I am.”
Nope. That was definitely me. I hugged him closer as he cracked a yawn. “Why don’t ye get some sleep? It’s been a big day and an even bigger night.”
“You’re right,” he said drowsily. “Will you stay?”
My heart swelled in my chest. “Aye, m’eudail. For as long as you’ll let me.”
I woke before Chester, my body conditioned by my recent early morning swims. Even with my closer proximity to the loch, that wasn’t what I was planning this morning.
No. I was going to make Chester breakfast.
It took me a minute or so to extract myself without waking him. He’d spent the entire night using my pec as a pillow, an arm and a leg thrown over mine.
I’d never slept so peacefully.
My wolf was thrilled as we tiptoed downstairs into the kitchen. Provide food for mate. Feed him. Make him happy .
He was definitely more present recently, which made sense given he’d settled on Chester being our mate.
I wasn’t sure what he’d do if Chester decided to go a different way, but I’d worry about that if it happened.
Deep down, I didn’t think it would come to that.
I might have been clinging to false hope, but didn’t I deserve some?
I’d loved Sarah without any—I didn’t want to do the same with Chester.
I’d lived without hope for so long and it had got me nowhere.
Maybe embracing it would lead to a better outcome.
I wanted to hope. I wanted to believe that this would end happily for us.
I moved around Chester’s kitchen on silent feet. Thanks to the many breakfasts he’d fed me over the past few weeks, I knew where everything was kept. I even knew how Chester took his tea—a drop of milk and a sweetener.
I held the sweetener canister over his mug and frowned. Did Chester prefer this to sugar? Or had he switched because of Matt?
I suspected it was the latter. Tempting as it was to replace it with sugar, that would be just as bad as what Matt had done. If Chester wanted something different, he had to be the one to make that decision.
My job was to give him the confidence to embrace the changes he wanted to make. To live his life authentically by doing whatever it was that brought him joy.
I set about preparing his breakfast while humming a tune in my head. Heady optimism about the day ahead filled me. The man I was falling for was asleep upstairs, and I was finally able to repay him for all the times he’d cooked for me. He’d learned the truth about me and hadn’t gone running .
Yes. Today was going to be a brilliant day. I could feel it in my bones.
Chester’s footsteps sounded on the stairs just as I was adding the bacon to his plate. I turned to see him freeze in the doorway. “Morning, m’eudail!”
He rubbed sleepily at one of his eyes. “Finn?”
I winked at him as I pulled his chair out for him. “The one and only. Come, sit down.”
Chester blinked a couple of times, like he was trying to clear the sleep fog from his mind.
Then he shuffled across the room and sank into the chair I was holding out for him.
I dropped a kiss on his head in greeting before turning to pick up his tea.
“Here. Breakfast will be another minute or so, but this should be the perfect drinking temperature.”
He took the mug from me automatically. “What’s going on?”
“I’m making you breakfast.” I went back to the oven and turned off the hobs. “We’ve got bacon, mushrooms,black pudding,and beans. I was going to do some eggs too, but you’re out.”
While I talked, I plated up Chester’s breakfast. Turning around, I found him staring down at the table, slightly pale. “Are you okay?”
“I don’t keep eggs in the house,” Chester said. I wasn’t sure where he was right now, but it wasn’t in this room with me. “Too many bad memories.”
My wolf howled and snarled as Chester seemed to sink further into the past. He was desperate to hunt down Matt. To make him feel the same level of pain that Chester was experiencing now.
“Sorry,” Chester said, shaking himself and flushing. “I’m making a fuss over nothing. ”
“Hey.” I put his plate on the table and touched his chin gently. “Look at me, Chester.”
It took a moment, but finally his defeated gaze met mine.
“It’s okay,” I said, quietly but firmly. “However you’re feeling right now, it’s okay . You don’t have to explain or justify anything, especially not to me.”
He smiled. It wasn’t much, but I’d take it. “Thanks, Finn.”
I nudged his plate towards him, just like I did as Buddy. “Eat up before it gets cold.”
“You didn’t need to make me breakfast.” He picked up his cutlery. “I could’ve sorted some.”
“It was my turn.” I grabbed my own plate. “You’ve cooked for me plenty, and I’ve been dying to return the favour. Got to keep my man fed and happy.”
When I turned around, Chester was on his feet in front of me. “Wha?—”
I didn’t get a chance to finish the word. Chester’s lips descended on mine, kissing me sweetly.
“Thank you,” he said when he pulled away. “You might not understand what you’ve done for me this morning, but thank you.”
Stunned and a little confused, it took me a beat to respond. “Whatever makes you happy, Chester.”
He squeezed my shoulder. “You joining me and us eating breakfast together would make me very happy.”