Chapter 10
TEN
JAX
Lukas had been blessedly silent through the whole scene so far. The only reason I knew he was still here was the way I caught him in my periphery, moving around the room for better angles. The rest of my focus was on Asher and the way he trembled in my arms as he settled down on my cock.
His chest heaved with every inch that he took.
His breathing was shaky and uneven as he worked my cock deeper.
The presence of River and Lukas and their cameras made me kind of wish that I’d been somehow able to convince Blue and Asher to do this away from the cameras, while also being grateful they were there to capture every moment.
By the time Asher took all of me, Blue had stripped himself naked, putting his gorgeous body on display. I suddenly felt like I needed two of me so I could give my full attention to both men.
Blue stepped closer, a hand wrapped around the base of his cock.
I watched him give it a stroke as he reached for Asher.
Blue didn’t command. He didn’t push Asher or direct him.
He waited patiently for Asher to understand what was being asked of him.
It didn’t take long before Asher made a needy sound and then took Blue’s cock into his mouth.
“That’s right. So good, baby. Easy now. You’re doing so good.” With every bit of praise that fell from Blue’s mouth, Asher responded by squirming, his ass clenching around my dick every time he moved.
The sight of them did things to me that I couldn’t articulate if I tried.
Blue looked at Asher with a tender affection that made my heart hurt.
When Asher found his rhythm, his fingers digging into my chest, his body rocking on top of me, riding my cock as he sucked Blue’s, I looked up at Blue as he tipped his head back, accentuating the long line of his neck.
I wanted to kiss every inch of him, and it pained me that there wouldn’t be time for that.
When the cameras stopped rolling, Blue’s rules would go back in place.
I got it. I did. He didn’t have to explain that his rules were about protecting himself. But understanding something didn’t mean I necessarily liked it, even though I honored his rules and never tried to get him to break them. Maybe it was because deep down I knew I wasn’t worth breaking them for.
“You should feel this ass,” I told Blue in an effort to drag my mind back to the moment. Because if the moment was all I had, I was going to make sure I lived it to the fullest. “It’s so tight. So fucking good.”
I gave Asher’s hips a squeeze, let my hands roam over his body. Toyed with his nipples to make him squirm on my cock some more. God, the fun I could have with someone so sweet. So responsive. So eager to please.
Blue pulled out of Asher’s mouth and brushed a thumb against the corner then swooped down and captured him in a kiss.
I felt the way Asher swayed toward Blue while still gripping on to me like he needed us both at once.
The room was quiet except for the steady thudding of my heart and the sweet sounds Asher made as Blue kissed him.
“My turn,” Blue said as he pulled away, leaving Asher looking a little dumbstruck by the kiss they shared.
Blue helped Asher to his feet and I moved out of the way.
Asher knelt on the couch, using the back to brace himself.
And Blue, well, Blue set his sights on me, and I didn’t pass up the opportunity to haul him against me and kiss the life out of him.
Kiss away years of frustrated longing and unrequited everything.
His mouth was soft and warm and his tongue was gentle against mine in a way that hollowed out my soul.
Everything about Blue was different now. From the way he moved to the way he kissed, down to the storm of feelings that he kicked up in me when he sank his fingers into my hair and deepened the kiss before pulling away suddenly.
He looked at me and something passed between us, but I didn’t have time to decipher every interaction. Every look. Every touch and kiss.
Knowing that Blue didn’t fuck unless he was on camera made me unable to look away as he slid in behind Asher.
He stroked his hands over Asher’s skin and leaned forward, whispering something in his ear that I didn’t catch.
Asher laughed softy and then moaned when Blue kissed his neck.
Then Blue was lining up his cock with Asher’s hole, and I watched, mesmerized, as Blue slid inside him.
Asher gripped the back of the couch, but went almost boneless as Blue wrapped his arms around Asher and suddenly I was no longer content to sit on the sidelines and watch the two of them together. I had to get closer.
Kneeling on the couch next to them, I practically grabbed Blue and crashed our mouths together.
His rhythm barely faltered as I devoured him.
Kissed him with everything I had, wanting it to be enough for him to break his rules, but knowing it wouldn’t be.
If it was possible for kiss-telepathy to exist, he’d know that I’d used the kiss to tell him all the things I couldn’t say with words.
That I couldn’t stop thinking about him.
That he was deserving of happiness.
That I was worth the risk.
Suddenly, I was aware of the way Asher trembled. His whimpers grew in intensity, and there was no mistaking the orgasm that shook his body. Blue moaned into my mouth, and I prayed to God that he wasn’t going to finish at the same time because I wasn’t nearly ready for any of this to be over yet.
And neither was Blue. Blue, who sweetly pulled out of Asher. I moved to let them resituate themselves. He coaxed Asher down onto his back and I watched, a funny ache in my chest burning white hot as Blue slid into Asher. He wound his body around Blue’s in all the ways he could.
Not one to be left out, I coated my cock with lube and wedged myself behind Blue.
We’d discussed things beforehand, and we’d agreed to both be prepped and ready to go so when the scene came we could just do what felt right.
And what felt right was me sliding in behind Blue and using a finger to tease his hole, to test how well prepped he was to make sure I didn’t hurt him.
Blue and Ash were fucking in missionary, which allowed me to press my hand to Blue’s lower back as I directed my cock to his waiting hole. I held my breath. Suddenly unable to think beyond a single word that crashed around in my mind.
Finally. Fucking finally. Fin-al-ly.
I’d have fucked Blue every day for the past three years if he’d have let me.
I’d have given anything for a scrap of his affection.
A shred of his attention. I’d settled for friendship.
Acquaintances sometimes when life kept us too busy to keep in close contact.
It had been an easy choice. I wasn’t going to go where I wasn’t wanted and ask for things I knew the answer to.
I might have dreamed about this moment for three years, but that didn’t mean I hadn’t been willing to wait for it.
Blue’s moans were muffled by Asher, who brought his leg up, probably intending to wrap it around Blue, but I caught it on a whim and kissed the instep of his foot, then the ankle.
When Asher keened, it broke my restraint and I slammed forward, driving myself deeper into Blue. Slamming him deeper into Asher.
The sounds they made, whimpers and moans and guttural throat sounds, sounds that on their own, would be hot, but mingled together were incendiary. My hips took on a mind of their own and I fucked Blue but never let go of Asher.
I’d had a lot of sex, but not all sex was created equal.
Some sex was bad. Some was good. Memorable was a sliding scale, I’d learned.
Not everything memorable was going to be etched into my soul for the rest of eternity the way these two were.
Not every partner made you feel like your whole life had changed just by knowing them.
But Blue had captured my interest three years ago and Asher had captured it now, and the two of them together were something special. It was hard not to feel like an intruder with the way they devoured each other.
Then Blue whispered frantically that he was close. He sat up and I pulled him into my arms, keeping my cock buried inside him as he stroked himself to completion, shooting cum up Asher’s chest and coating his cock.
Reaching for Blue, I turned his head and kissed him hard and deep as I choked down my jealousy in favor of realizing the beauty of the connection we all shared.
Blue subtly tapped my leg, letting me know he wanted me to move, and I slid out of him only to watch him slide down Asher’s body, licking the cum off his chest.
Asher made a garbled sound when Blue started to gently lick the cum off his cock.
The harsh reality was that whatever our connection was, when the cameras stopped rolling, it would be severed.
Blue would throw his walls back up. Asher would find other willing people to scene with.
Or he’d leave the industry entirely. I’d seen both happen with similar frequency.
And I’d be in the same place I’d been for three years.
Desperately wanting people I couldn’t have.
Blue didn’t like anyone enough to let them in, and Asher was hopelessly in love with Lukas. I didn’t stand a chance. The thought might have killed my erection were it not for the sight of Blue’s mouth on Asher’s cock and Asher’s skin all pink and sweaty as he trembled.
I moved to the side of the couch and wrapped a hand around my cock. It was clear to me that Asher had almost run out of steam and his body was reaching the point of being oversensitive, if the sounds he made while Blue sucked the cum off his cock were any indication.
I stared down at Asher as he looked up at me. He gave me a loose, kind, not quite all there dopey smile.
“Close your eyes, baby,” I warned him, barely able to hold back long enough so he could obey.
Then I came on his face. I came on the tongue that poked out of his mouth and his rosy red cheeks.
On his parted, panting lips and when I was done, Blue was there, kissing him, cleaning him up with his tongue.
Licking every last drop of cum off Asher’s face before kissing him again.
My legs were wobbly and weak, and I watched as Asher and Blue got comfortable in their post-orgasm glow.
Blue glanced up at me and gave me a smile that felt like an invitation.
I wasn’t about to pass up any kind of reason to be close to them and wedged myself in there, sitting at the end of the couch.
I let Asher use my lap as a pillow. He curled up on his side, and somehow Blue curled up behind him.
It was a tight fit, one that had their limbs tangled up and Blue wrapping his arms around Asher to anchor them together.
And me, well, I indulged and let myself run my fingers through Asher’s hair, petting him as he tried to get his breathing back to normal. My other hand happened to find Blue so I could touch him and remind myself that this had been real. Even if it was fleeting.