Chapter 25
25
‘So, talk me through this again?’ Kirstie’s face peers at me from the phone screen. ‘You kissed Matt and felt all kinds of sparks, but now you’ve kissed Jay and you’re not speaking to Matt any more?’
‘It’s not quite like that,’ I say, squirming.
‘So how is it then?’
I sigh heavily. This is why I’ve been avoiding speaking to my friends for the last few days – because I knew Kirstie in particular wouldn’t understand – and I’m not sure I can fully explain it either.
‘I’ve been on a date with Jay and he’s really lovely, and?—’
‘So, you didn’t kiss Matt?’
‘Well, yes I did. But that doesn’t matter, because I’ve met Jay now, and he is the reason I came all this way in the first place.’
Kirstie fixes me with a look, then shakes her head. ‘I wondered why you were avoiding me.’
‘I haven’t been avoiding you!’
She raises her eyebrows. ‘So, you don’t call for a week, and then when you do, you’ve somehow kissed and dumped one man, and been on a date with another man and kissed him too?’ She shakes her head again. ‘It’s Matt I feel sorry for in all of this. The man is smitten with you – and I think you’re pretty keen on him too.’
‘I’m not keen on him, and even if I were it wouldn’t matter because I’ve met Jay now and he’s really lovely and kind and funny and… and… and a good kisser.’
‘What are we, twelve?’ Kirstie shakes her head. ‘M’rand, I know you think you should be with this Jay because of the dreams, but honestly, you need to make sure you’re doing this for the right reasons.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘I mean, darling, that I saw you with Matt. You had this look in your eye when you looked at him that I haven’t seen for years and?—’
‘You got all this from a chat over FaceTime?’
‘Yes, I did as it happens. So what does that say?’ She sighs. ‘I’m just worried that you’re so fixated on finding this Jay that you’ve convinced yourself you like him more than you actually do, and you’re just going to end up getting hurt.’
I’m about to object, to tell her she doesn’t know what she’s talking about, when Sophie’s face appears on the screen beside her.
‘Good grief, I go to the loo for five seconds and you’re already telling Miranda off?’ she says.
‘I am not telling her off, I’m just telling her I think she’s making a massive mistake.’
‘Well, I don’t.’ Sophie smiles at me. ‘Don’t listen to her,’ she says. ‘I think it’s amazing that you’ve actually met Jay. I mean, against all those odds, it’s incredible. That’s got to mean something, hasn’t it?’
‘Thank you, Sophie, at least one of you is happy for me,’ I say, fixing Kirstie with a look.
‘I was happy for you when I thought you were about to get together with the delicious Matt!’ Kirstie yells from behind Sophie’s head, but Sophie doesn’t let her get close to the screen again.
‘Tell me more about this Jay,’ Sophie says. ‘Have you recognised anything else about him from the dream yet?’
‘For God’s sake, of course she hasn’t!’ Kirstie yells, but we both ignore her and a few seconds later I see her sulking on the sofa in the background.
‘Not really. I mean, I had a sneaky look round his house but it was weirdly tidy and didn’t really give away anything about who he is or what he likes. But…’ I pause, unsure whether to voice my doubts while Kirstie is there listening.
‘What’s wrong?’
I sigh. ‘It’s just… he’s really handsome and funny, and we had a lovely kiss but… well, we don’t really like any of the same things. And I mean nothing.’
‘Such as?’
‘He likes skydiving for a start and I’m never putting myself through that again. But it’s more than that. He doesn’t like books. Says he’s never really seen the point of reading. And I could get past that but he doesn’t really like music either.’
‘Well, neither do I and you like me.’
‘I know but… that’s different. You know how much books and music are part of my life. I just can’t imagine being with someone who has zero interest in either of those things.’ I stop, aware how weak it sounds, almost as though I’m trying to talk myself out of falling for this man. ‘But there are good things too. I mean, he’s kind, he makes me laugh. He’s got good hair?—’
Sophie laughs. ‘Try not to worry too much about the things that are different. Perhaps that’s the point of this. I mean, the men you usually go for who do like the same things as you have clearly not been right for you so far. Maybe the point of this whole thing is to help you see past all that and get to know the actual person who turns out to be your soulmate.’
Soulmate. It’s a word loaded with so much significance it makes me feel breathless. Could Jay really be my soulmate? Should you know it the instant you meet someone, or is it something which grows over time, as you get to know one another?
Sophie’s right about one thing anyway – my usual type hasn’t worked out so far. So perhaps the point of this is to look beyond a ‘type’ to find my Mr Right.
I’m trying very hard not to think about Matt in all of this. Matt, who I do have things in common with and who does make me feel tingly when I think about kissing him. That’s not what matters now. It’s in the past, done with. There was a reason I was having these dreams, I still strongly believe that, and if I ignore what they were trying to tell me, I know I’ll live to regret it.
‘You’re right. This could be it,’ I say. ‘Jay is my soulmate, it’s just going to take some time for those feelings to properly develop.’
‘Exactly,’ Sophie says, seemingly satisfied. But Kirstie is back again now and she doesn’t look quite so pleased.
‘I know you’re not going to listen to me, but I’m going to say it anyway. I love you, Miranda, and I hope so much that this works out the way you want it to. But I still think you’re looking in the wrong place.’ She shrugs. ‘I know you need to do what you’re going to do and nothing I can say will change that.’ She grins wickedly. ‘But if you don’t want Matt, can I have him?’
‘Kirstie!’ we both squeal at the same time, and she cackles.
‘What? He’s hot and it seems a waste.’ She must see the horrified expression on my face then because she looks suddenly serious. ‘Sorry. Just kidding.’
We chat some more and, just before we end the call, Kirstie says, ‘Actually, I’ve been meaning to ask you if I can come up again?’
My heart leaps. ‘Of course! When?’
‘Next week? Or the week after?’
‘I’d love that.’
Sophie pops her head in. ‘I’m going to try and come too, but it depends on the kids – they’ve both said they’re coming to stay soon but haven’t confirmed when. Can I let you know?’
‘Yes, yes, yes!’ I say, thrilled at the prospect of seeing my best friends in real life. I’m also excited – and slightly nervous – about them meeting Jay. Especially Kirstie, as I know she’ll be looking for reasons why he’s not right for me.
But I’m determined to prove her wrong, and show her that, not only is she mistaken about Matt, but Jay is without doubt The One.