17. Chapter 17 - Ravi
Chapter 17
A fter the gun went off, I grabbed Rin’s neck, turned her away from the scene, and took the gun. She didn't need to keep picturing that over and over again. That was what my fucking uncle wanted. He wanted to break her, but Rin wouldn't be broken after this. No, my brothers and I would make sure of that, keeping all her pieces to put her together again. Always.
Rion pulled her stiff form into his arms, kissing her head as he whispered how good she had done, how she’d finished the hardest part of all of this. That she was ready. He told her he would see her at the house, but she just nodded numbly. All I could do was shake my head in response to his concerned look. It was going to take time, but she’d come back to us. She might not be exactly the same, but she would come back, and that was all that mattered.
Roux also had to leave, so he pulled her into him. He buried his face into her neck, kissing her softly as he repeated how strong she was. He even told her that she’d put his first kill to shame. She flinched when he said that, but he only held her tighter. He might be a dick most of the time, but when he really needed to show up, he did. After kissing her shaky hands while delivering promises to see her soon, he left.
Finally, it was just me and her in this foul, sickening rat nest. Carefully wrapping my arm around her, I tugged her toward the door. She stopped, and the words she spoke were said in a flat tone that was completely unlike her. “What are we going to do with the body?”
My heart broke in two, hearing her sound so dejected, so empty, but I was determined to get her back from this. “Our uncle is going to take care of this. It's the least that asshole can do.” I couldn’t keep the growl from my voice, but I didn’t let myself fall into that rage.
She nodded, looking at me for the first time with life sparking in her eyes. “I hate that man.”
I do, too. I hated what he had made us do. The craving to kill him crawled beneath my skin, making me want to scratch that gnawing itch, but I had to remind myself it wasn't time. We needed Rion to become head of the family before we made any moves. He was collecting evidence right now to ensure our win, so we had to play nice and follow the rules. As soon as we were done with that, his day in hell would come, swift and unforgiving.
Looking down the hallway to make sure no one was in it, I responded, “We all do. Trust me.”
She turned slowly, clutching my arm in a vise grip. “That man raised you.” Her voice grew hollow, her lips turning down into a deep frown, and I stilled, unable to take my eyes off her. “Which means you had to do something even worse than that.”
Looking at her like an idiot, I nodded. Her eyes filled with emotion as her thumb rubbed against my wrist. That little bit of compassion filled my heart, the spot where she rubbed turning into a fiery flame that licked up my arm and consumed my body. I took an involuntary step forward, compelled to absorb more of her light, to consume as much as my body could take.
Her gasp broke the spell, and I looked down at her trembling form. No. This wasn’t what I wanted to do. Now was not the time for this. I needed to take care of her, keep that light from extinguishing. With heavy limbs, I moved back a few steps, giving us both breathing room.
“Let's get out of here.” Her quick nod let me know that she’d heard me, but as her tongue swiped her lips, I gritted my teeth and turned away. I tried a different tactic, smiling as if I could treat this all like a game. “When we leave this house, I’m going to carry you out, so I need you to cry and wail, okay?”
Her confused face was, in fact, cute, so I elaborated, giving her a wink. “My uncle is watching from somewhere outside, and we want him to believe that he won this round.”
She looked around as we walked down the stairs. “If this is a drug house, where are all the others?”
“We had Rion get rid of them before we came, oh!” I thought back to before, hoping that this would make her a little happier. “And Roux saved that girl. That's why I took a picture of the plates and texted him the direction the car went.”
She stopped moving, her eyes filled with tears, the first to come after being forced to do the unthinkable. I scooped her up in my arms before I opened the door. “Keep that going.”
She curled into my chest, gripping my shirt as her tears ran freely. She wasn't wailing, wasn't fighting me like I thought she would, and that made it so much more soul wrenching. This was real for her, and she was letting it all out.
“Thank you.” Her wobbly voice had me wanting to stab someone, hurt someone. A lot.
Opening the car, I placed her in the passenger seat, where she curled up into a ball. Silent tear tracks continued, and I gripped the car so hard my nails hurt. “Need to keep you safe,” was all I said as I buckled her seatbelt and closed the door. I took a full breath, running both hands through my hair before I circled the car. This might be a show for my uncle, but it was very real for the rest of us. At least I was sure our uncle would be pleased, which would get him off our backs for a little bit. It was all about the little things.
Rin stopped crying about an hour into the three-hour drive. I almost jumped out of my seat when she sat up, wiped her tears, and stared out the window.
I didn't know what to say, what to do, to make her feel better. Completely at a loss, I had moved to turn on the radio when she spoke. “What did he put you guys through?”
Leaning back, I blew out a big breath. That was a loaded fucking question.
The human conscience inside of me begged me not to tell her, to spare her from the pain of knowing what had happened to us when we left her. It wasn’t remotely good. Some would say it was downright horrific, always filled with darkness and pain. The monster I’d been crafted into told me she needed to hear something that made her feel less alone.
“Rin, this story isn’t going to be good. In fact, it's quite gruesome. The stuff that nightmares are made of.” I was trying my best to dissuade her, but I knew that if this was what she truly wanted, I couldn’t deny her.
She turned those blank, empty-eyed face on me. “And you think I’ll be spared nightmares tonight?”
I don't know if it was the feeling of faliure that was riding me hard or her expression, but my eyes watered without my permission. Just as one drop spilled over, she caught it with her thumb, staring at it before putting it in her mouth. I was so confused. Lust and heartbreak rode side by side, and I realized that only Rin could do this to me. Could make pain feel so sweet.
“Fine. I guess it's only fair." I sucked all my emotions up, trying to smile at her like everything was going to be okay. “We saw your first kill, so I should tell you about ours.” She faced me fully, and my cheeks grew hot. “I'm going to keep my eyes on the road, so… don't distract me.” She nodded, as I worked up the courage to keep my word.
“We didn't get a lot of outside time before the age of fourteen. Those four years were spent crafting our skills. It was a lot of pain manipulation, using physical pain as an incentive. We were young enough that it worked on us for a while, but then we got older, more defiant, and he needed a better way to keep us in check.”
That was when we had our first lesson that pain wasn’t the worst thing that could happen to you.
“We eventually found a way to escape the compound and sneak into the nearest town. For the first time in years, we were able to meet people outside of our uncle and his few goons. It was the first time the three of us split up, wanting to explore different things. Rion helped an old lady at a local shop, Roux met some rowdy boy and started a fight ring with some kids our age, and I snuck into a movie theater I stumbled upon.” Fingers tightened on the wheel as I remembered her wide, innocent brown eyes. “I ended up meeting the young daughter of the owner. She would sneak me popcorn and call me big brother.”
I took a breath, and in the brief silence, memories I hadn’t visited in a long time flooded my brain. At first, I found her to be annoying, her being only eight while I was a big man at fourteen. I tried to threaten her into leaving me alone, but she just giggled and sat down next to me, telling me facts about the movie. It was the most wholesome relationship I’d ever had. She was the one who’d taught me what it meant to fangirl over someone thanks to her next-level love for some boy band I’d never heard of. She taught me what it meant to be completely devoted and obsessed for the love of your life.
“Once we had made deep enough attachments, our uncle confronted us at the escape route with a few of his men. They dragged us back, not into our rooms, but to the training hall. They tied us up so tight I thought my arms and legs would break.” Rubbing my wrists at the memory of pain, I continued. We cried, promising him we would never leave again. “We were so afraid of the pain he was going to inflict on us we didn’t pay attention to the three hooded bodies he brought in.”
I looked at Rin, needing her strength. Her face was still neutral, but her eyes gave me the compassion I needed to strengthen my resolve. “He laughed ,” I spat. “I can still hear his full joyful laugh in the back of my mind.” Switching my gaze back to the road, I took a breath and continued.
“He lifted the first hood, and under it was the old lady Rion had been working with. He began beating her up, hitting her over and over. Her cries of pain filled the space around us while blood sprayed the floor. Rion fought against his restraints, swearing to do whatever our uncle asked if he would just stop, but he didn't. He tortured that woman until she was within an inch of her life, then he moved to the next one.”
My throat went dry, and I gulped. “It was Roux’s friend, just a boy. He cried when my uncle took out the crowbar, beating him until his ribs cracked and his head was bleeding badly. Somehow, he was still breathing. Roux was the same as Rion, begging and screaming, but that only egged our uncle on. I remember the way his eyes lit up, enjoying every moment. Once the boy was crumpled on the floor, half dead, he yanked the last hood.”
Taking a shaky breath, I whispered, “I already knew who it would be.”
I heard a soft exhale, so I turned to see Rin’s silent tears, tears that I’d always refused to shed, and they made me feel better for some reason. At least someone was crying for my young friend since I couldn’t.
“He did the same to that girl… to Emily.” That was the first time I said her name out loud since that night, and while it pained me, I also felt lighter.
I choked out, “I can still hear her cries sometimes. ‘Big brother, help me. Save me.’ I couldn't do that. I watched my brothers fall apart, watched the way my uncle reveled in the blood and the pain, and I decided that I couldn’t do that. I couldn't give him the satisfaction he wanted. Each time he hit her, I told her I was sorry, lying to her with each promise that it would be over soon. That only seemed to make my uncle angrier, so his hits became harder, which meant her time of suffering was shorter.”
My head was pounding, and I realized I had ground my teeth so hard it was making pain radiate up from my jaw. Letting out a breath, I continued, just wanting to get this story done and over with. “Finally, our restraints were cut off and guns were placed in front of us. He told us we needed to kill the people we had affection for, that we needed to pull the last straw of their lives and keep them with us forever. He needed us to do this to show we were ending our rebellious stage of life.”
I gave her a small side smile, trying to lighten the mood. “We looked at each other and nodded, taking up the guns and shooting them at the same time. As they slumped to the ground, finally free of him, of us, we made a silent vow that we would kill that man, and when the time came, it would be vicious and mind-numbingly painful.”
“Good!” Rin yelled. Tear tracks had dried on her face, but her eyes were filled with a vengeful rage. I remembered those days when the rage was so strong I couldn't control myself. Now, only my feelings for Rin made me lose control, but it was nice to see all the same.
“Yes, Rin, but our uncle is crafty.” I tutted. “So, while we are making plans to take him down, they need to be perfect. There can be no way for him to get out of it. We’re waiting ‘til Rion gets instated as head of the family before we make any of our moves.”
“Yes. I could see how that would be the best plan. Less power for him to manipulate.”
God, she was so fucking cute, her smart brain thinking away. Her hand grasped her chin as she nodded, staring out the window. It reminded me of Rion a little bit.
He didn't want us to loop her in until after her test, not wanting to add to her stress, but I felt like she would appreciate my honesty. “When Rion passed the test at eighteen and the other council members talked about him taking over as the Ambros heir, our uncle was enraged. He threatened to expose us as triplets, so the two ‘spares’ would be disposed of.” Her audible gasp had me smiling again. It was nice to be cared for. “Basically, he wants Rion to be his puppet, so he’s held that threat over our heads. Rion had to agree to be head of the family in name only, in order to keep us safe.”
Her body shook as her anger increased. Her face was flushed and twisted up. “That asshole! Of course Rion would tell your uncle yes. He wouldn't put you guys in that kind of situation, I’m sure there was no other way of turning things around. The more I hear about your uncle, the clearer it becomes why the council would never want a man like him to be in power.”
“As you can already tell, my uncle has a hard time making nice with others. He has a superiority complex that doesn't rub the others the right way.”
When the council had announced Rion as successor, my uncle went into a fit of rage, breaking everything in the house. The joy of that moment still filled me whenever I thought about it. “They’re also big on tradition, and since our father was the last head, they wanted to keep that direct line going. The final nail in the coffin was when Rion came out with that face-scrubbing software. It gave him the advantage since our uncle hadn’t provided anything big for Foedus, and they’re big about council members ‘proving’ they’re worth the seat.”
Glancing over at her, she was rubbing her temples as she whined, “God, there’re so many fucking rules and politics. It makes a girl’s head spin.”
Huffing out a laugh, I recognized the turn-off into our secluded neighborhood. “If you have more questions, Rion can answer them. He’s super good with the rules and stuff like that.”
She was staring out the window, eyes glazed over, and I knew what she was thinking about.
As soon as we got through the gate, Rion and Roux were outside waiting for us. I’d barely jerked to a stop before Roux tore the door open, unbuckled Rin, and lifted her into his arms.
“You need to eat,” was all he said as he carted her into the house.
Rion waited for me to catch up, his eyes on her as he asked, “How was the drive?”
I knew what he really wanted to hear—how she was doing. I shrugged, keeping my voice low since we were following behind them. “She had a good cry when we left, and it was timed perfectly. I think it had more to do with Roux rescuing the girl, relieving her of that guilt, than it was about the actual killing.”
Remembering the emotionless face she had given me, I stopped Rion. “Something has changed in her. She’s…”
“Less naive.” Rion’s comment was so predictable that I rolled my eyes.
“No. It's more like when she goes into survival mode, but now it doesn't take much to trigger that part of herself.” Rion’s eyes widened as he looked back at where Roux was trying to feed her ravioli. Italian food, nice! It was the best comfort food, and the fact that he’d perched her right on top of the island was comical enough that it had to lighten her mood a tiny bit.
“Let's keep an eye on her.”
This time, I looked at him, raising my eyebrow. “Like we don't already?”
“You know what I mean.” He glared at me until we heard her giggle. Both of us turned to her like moths to a flame.
“No! I’m already chewing one. You can’t stuff more into my mouth. That’s not how eating works.” She tried to scold Roux, but even I knew that was a losing battle.
“That’s actually the definition of eating.” He had another ravioli primed and ready on a fork. “You put one in your mouth and eat it before the next one goes in your mouth. Eating . Would you like for me to spell it?” She playfully punched him in the arm before taking the second bite. I was just glad she was eating.
“I feel like I should tell you that I told her about our first kills.” Rion stiffened, looking at me like how-could-you, but I didn't care. It was the only right choice for the moment, so I told him just that. “She needed it. She needed to not feel like she was the only one that had to do something like that. In fact, I think it helped her connect with us a little more, seeing us as humans instead of obsessive, crazy monsters.”
“But we are,” was his response, and I cracked a smile.
“Yeah, but now we’re all monsters.”
“She’s not a monster. She is perfect!” Rion spat out his motto like I’d never heard it before.
“I know, I know. But she thinks she is, and now she thinks we can be monsters together. She needed to hear it. Also, it made her more ready to be on our side in helping us take the Ambros seat once she passes.”
He glared at me from the side of his eyes. “But we don't need her to do that. She should just stay here and be pampered all day.”
“Yeah, I don't know if our girl is going to like that. Seems like she appreciates honesty and being clued in more. Just trust me.” He eyed me up and down before he gave a sharp nod and turned away, done with me. Prick.
After we ate, she stood up and thanked each of us for helping her. We assured her we would do it a thousand times over, and she gave a sad smile. Then she asked something I had thought was off the table.
“Is there… Is there any way one of you could sleep next to me tonight?” The clanging of dropped forks echoed as all of us looked at her. “I don't think I’ll have a good night tonight, and I was hoping for some help with the… nightmares.”
We all volunteered, already trying to work out shifts, but she solved that problem. With a smirk, she informed us that the California king in her room could fit everyone, and we weren’t going to turn down that offer.
That was the fastest I’d ever undressed. When she opened her door, dressed down in sleep shorts and a tank-top, my nether regions tingled.
That night, nothing much happened, but I was able to hold my girl in my arms and soothe her worries. Splitting that time between my brothers, we all got the best sleep of our lives. It didn’t matter that she had nightmares; what mattered was the fact that we were there to fight them off for her.
It was the best night of my life.