Homecoming - Chapter 5 #2
“Rob gives shit advice. Forget everything he said. Here’s what you do. Date her for a couple years and take things slow like I did with Bee. It’s the best way. Stretch that honeymoon phase out for as long as possible.”
“Matt?” It was Bee now. “Don’t listen to anything Mason says. There is nothing wrong with going fast instead of at a tortoises’ pace. Your brother has commitment issues.”
“I do not,” Mason said.
“Okay, thanks guys!” I said. “Gotta go!” I hung up on them.
Rob started whistling and put his phone in his pocket. “Oh, our food is here. Perfect timing.” He cut the stack of pancakes down the middle and piled syrup on his before dropping a dollop of butter on mine, just the way I liked them. “Dig in.”
“Dude, what the hell?”
“Oh, you want syrup today? I guess you are celebrating.” He lifted up the syrup bottle.
“No.” I pushed the syrup back onto the table. “I’m trying to get your advice here. Not loop everyone in so that Kennedy will probably find out before I pop the question.”
“Hmmm. Have you already told Tanner?”
“No.”
“Well good. Now all your actual best friends know before that imposter.”
“You seriously just called all of them to make sure they knew before Tanner?” I took a bite of pancakes. “You’re ridiculous.”
“You’re ridiculous,” he said over a mouthful of food. “Your best friends should know first.” He swallowed his bite. “And now I can focus. Why isn’t Kennedy speaking to you?”
“I don’t know. I had such clarity last night.
I’m ready to move on from everything in the past, you know?
I want to do that with her. And I thought we were on the same page.
I texted her last night telling her I was coming over.
And she seemed excited to see me. But when I got there, she didn’t buzz me up.
She didn’t answer her phone. I was able to get into the building when someone walked out.
And even then it took a lot of convincing to make her come out to talk to me.
She was crying…I…I don’t know what happened. ”
“Did you ask her what was wrong?”
“Of course I asked her. She kept saying she couldn’t tell me.”
“Hmm. Interesting. What else?”
“She told me what we did was a mistake. She was trying to push me away.”
“And then what?”
“Eventually I calmed her down enough to at least let me hold her while she cried. But as soon as she calmed down she pushed me away again.”
“And then…”
“She told me not to reach out to her. But that she’d reach out to me. And then she slammed the door in my face.”
Rob pressed his lips together and nodded.
“So…what do you think the best approach is here? All that keeps going through my head is the boombox outside her window thing. Do they still sell boomboxes somewhere?”
Rob just kept nodding.
“Do you have another idea?”
Rob sighed. “So…here’s the thing.” He took another bite of pancake and chewed it really freaking slowly. “I have good news and bad news.”
“Okay…”
“The good news is you’re about to save a lot of money.”
I just stared at him.
“Because there’s no reason to buy a ring. Since the bad news is that Kennedy dumped your ass.”
“It was just a disagreement.”
“Eh. No, you’ve been dumped.”
“She said she’d call me.”
“And how many girls have you said you’d call ?” He put call in air quotes and stared at me. “She’s probably long gone by now. Back to Chicago to avoid you. What did you do to screw that up so badly so quickly?”
“Nothing.”
“Did you talk about Brooklyn a lot?”
“No…I…I mean…maybe a little.”
Rob shook his head. “You probably talked about her a lot . And it was already a delicate situation with the two of them having been best friends and all.”
“I don’t think that’s what happened.”
“Well, was there anything else weird about last night?”
I tried to think. “Actually, yeah. She refused to let me in to talk. And kept telling me I had to go. And there was this weird wailing noise inside her apartment before she slammed the door in my face.”
Rob gasped. “Secret. Baby. Romance.”
“What?”
“I don’t know. Daphne reads some romance books sometimes and she loves those secret baby ones.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“I’m not exactly sure either. She reads a lot and the stories blur together in my head.
But I think the gist is that there’s always a surprise baby in the mix that someone doesn’t know about.
So did you sleep with Kennedy 16 years ago?
Maybe you have a surprise baby together.
That kind of thing. Ooooh Daphne is going to be so excited about this!
I can’t wait to tell her.” He grabbed his phone again.
I pulled it away from him. “It wouldn’t be a baby then. It would be like 15. And no, I didn’t sleep with her back in high school.”
“Well, that doesn’t mean there’s not a secret baby. Maybe she has a secret baby with your worst enemy!”
“Mr. Pruitt?”
“Oooh! An age-gap romance too!”
I laughed. “The wailing noise didn’t sound like a baby. I think it was a cat.”
“Well then you’re either looking at a cozy mystery or a furry romance, I think. I’ll have to ask Daphne to be sure. Either way, that’s not nearly as fun.” Rob sighed. “What a bummer. A double bummer really. Because now there’s no baby and your ass is still dumped.”