Chapter 42
"H i, sweetheart." Drew's mom pulled me in for a warm, lingering hug.
I closed my eyes and breathed in the familiar rose scent of my mother-in-law. I couldn't think of her as former yet. "Hi, Mary."
I loved Drew's mom. The moment we met, she'd treated me like her daughter, instantly relieving my nerves with her warm and welcoming nature. The last time we'd spoken was outside Carlos' apartment. I missed her.
"Oh, where's your little princess?"
"She's with my dad. I-I didn't think you would want to see her."
She looked taken aback. “What? Of course I do. Drew couldn’t stop raving about his little buddy. He even FaceTimed me while he was watching her. It was very cute."
My throat closed over at that reveal. Drew's behavior genuinely baffled me, although I was grateful that he treated my daughter like...well, like he liked her. I didn't know what to make of it.
"He looked pretty cuddly with her when I came over," I smiled at the memory. "She was asleep on his chest."
Mary clutched her heart and made an 'aww' sound.
"I thought…because of the circumstances of her birth, you wouldn't…"
Mary's eyes softened, and her mouth turned down in understanding. As soon as I uttered those words, I realized how silly they were. Mary wasn't the type of person who held animosity like that. After all, she'd called me after she found out I was pregnant and had thrown her support behind me. I didn’t know why I expected her to have a change of heart.
I settled on Mary's floral blue couch with a warm cup of coffee in hand. The first thing that caught my eye was the huge portrait of Drew and I on our wedding day. We had just come up for air after another heated kiss and were gazing at each other lovingly while Mary and my dad beamed with pride next to us. I wasn't surprised that Mary still had it up, but I did wonder what Drew thought about it when he visited.
I tore my gaze away from the photo before I started to lose myself in forgotten memories. "Have you spoken with Drew about everything yet?"
Mary nodded. "He’s only told me that he’s had a chat with you about your marriage and the mistakes he's made." Mary set her coffee aside. "What's on your mind, honey?"
I took a deep breath, knowing I was picking at a wound I wasn't sure Mary had recovered from.
"I never really got to speak to you in-depth about Drew's childhood. I only took what he told me: that his dad was in and out of his life and he has half-siblings he hasn't seen in years."
She nodded thoughtfully. She didn't seem put out by the probing statement. She didn't seem surprised either.
"Hmm. Drew idolized his father." She twisted her mouth in distaste. "Unfortunately, he wasn't much of one. He lived with us on and off during the first few years of his life before he took off permanently from the family home. Drew only remembered the times he was present, not the times he sat on the stoop waiting for his dad after he promised to take him somewhere."
She gave a sad smile. "His dad slept with someone he met on a night out—not the first time I’m sure, but the only time I had proof. I ended things with him completely by then, something I should've done a long time ago. From then on, it was like he had no reason to come around, and he barely did."
My heart broke for Drew. As a single mom, I knew how hard it was to balance life and a child—and that was with help from my dad and Nellie. Mary had no one while Drew was growing up.
I couldn't help but wonder whether my life would be similar. If Carlos wanted to be a part of Alani's life, I wanted him to be all in. None of this popping in and out, waiting months or years for him to remember he had a kid. I was still holding out hope that he wanted to be a part of his daughter's life, but not if he was planning to stay sitting on the outside.
"Drew mentioned that he didn't see his dad for a good chunk of his childhood. Not until he reached his teens."
Mary nodded. "When Drew was fifteen, he suddenly showed up and wanted to spend time with him. Drew was so excited, especially when he asked for Drew to spend weekends with him. But the longer he spent time with Gary, the more withdrawn he became." Her eyes flashed in anger, and she shook her head in remembrance.
"Turns out, he just wanted a free babysitter. He'd impregnated two other women. He wasn't with any of them, but he took the kids every other weekend to avoid paying an increase in child support. Drew watched them while their dad did whatever he wanted."
I gasped, and my hand covered my mouth in shock. "Oh, my God. Poor Drew."
She nodded in agreement. "This went on for almost a year before I forced him to confess what was going on. I phoned Gary and tore him a new one. I forbid him from seeing Drew again. Not that I needed to; Drew was over him by then and happily cut contact."
"And what about his siblings?"
Mary's mouth turned down. "Well, that was unfortunate. I wouldn't have minded if Drew wanted to keep in contact. Unfortunately, the kids ranged from eighteen months to three years old. Drew wanted nothing to do with them. He'd spent time changing their diapers and dealing with their tantrums—his words. He had no emotional connection to them, probably because he was a kid himself, having to become a temporary caregiver. He hasn't mentioned them to me since. I truly think he's not bothered."
I nodded. I could understand that. By that age, my mom had passed away. I took on the role of homemaker. Dad did what he could with cooking and cleaning, but I pulled my weight, too. I still had a typical teen experience, but I spent a lot of time worrying about my dad and helping with bills. For Drew, having to be the 'man of the house' after his dad left and then become a free babysitter to toddlers when he'd rather be out with his friends, I couldn't imagine having that much responsibility.
"I think Drew was disillusioned by the men in his life," Mary explained. "My own father was absent, then his dad. He had no positive male role model to look up to."
"Was he worried he would turn out like them?"
Mary paused, her head tilting as she considered my words. Her face cleared in understanding. "Quite possibly, yes. I think he's always been worried that he has his dad's flighty instincts. But, Drew always focused on the negative aspects of life. He didn't see what I saw. As soon as he met you, for example, he was all in. He'd come home from college, raving about his beauty."
I blushed at her words. Drew had always been open about his love and attraction to me. He was never ashamed to gloat about me or display his affection, no matter who was nearby.
"When you told me that you'd both talked about having kids, I was ecstatic. I never thought Drew was holding onto this…this insecurity about being a stable father. Recent behavior aside, he's already proved himself to be a wonderful boyfriend, fiance, and husband to you. He was already leaps and bounds ahead of his father and mine in every way possible."
That was true. He’d been the best partner I could ever ask for. I hated to think he’d been holding onto these issues throughout our relationship. Why couldn't he talk to me about it? He had been open about everything else throughout our relationship, so why not this? Did he think I wouldn't understand?
Mary and I chatted a bit more, mainly about my work and Alani. Without him present, I didn't want to delve further into Drew's thoughts and feelings.
Mary enveloped me in another tight hug when I rose to leave. "Now, next time I see you, I want there to be a little baby in your arms," she ordered.
I went home understanding Drew a little more, yet I still had a lot of questions.
After a restless night at Drew's apartment after our heavy talk, he'd surprised me the next morning by asking if he could take Alani and me out on a date. I was touched, if not a bit hesitant. I couldn't be sure whether he was just playing lip service. There was only one way to find out.