CHAPTER 22
It’d been five days since that wretched night, and he still hadn’t woken up. In my head, I kept saying he was resting and taking time to heal, but as the hours stretched, I became more and more wary of that thought.
I hadn’t left his side, and I’d been watching him like a hawk. Till now, his fingers only twitched twice. I took that as a sign that he was coming back to me. The doctors had been checking up on him, asserting that he was recovering very well, and that added to my hope. They reduced his sedative load and reassured us that he would wake up when he was ready. But that was two days ago.
“E, why don’t you eat or go get a shower or something? We can watch him for a while,” Katy prodded with her gentle voice.
“No.” I shook my head. I wasn’t leaving this chair anytime soon.
“But you haven’t eaten anything, Evy,” Mikey added from where he stood leaning against the wall, opposite us by the table filled with cards and flowers. They started arriving as soon as they shifted him to the room and hadn’t stopped. Now, the whole room smelled like flowers and had so much color that it felt like a Disney movie.
Yet my world was still dull and gray.
“I’m not hungry,” I replied to Mikey, who just sighed at this point, well-versed in my usual answer. I wasn’t going to eat when he wasn’t eating. The only thing sitting in my stomach was the tremendous amounts of coffee I consumed.
I didn’t mind the jitteriness. It kept me going, and that was all that I needed at the moment.
It wasn’t long before nightfall, and everyone emptied the room, leaving for the night.
“Are you going to wake up anytime soon?” I drew out a heavy breath, holding his hand, careful not to touch the tubes pumping him with fluids. “I’m bored. Can you wake up already?” I tried to muster a playful voice, but it came out more pathetic and desolate.
“Everyone’s worried about you, but at this point, I’m super mad. You’re making me wait way too long. I try not to let the bad thoughts get to me, but I just keep thinking what if you don’t wake up at all?” I sighed, my eyes sweeping over his resting face—lips pursed and closed eyes and the quiet rise and fall of his chest. His hair curled over his ears adorably, and his stubble had grown to a deep shadow. He looked so peaceful that I almost didn’t want to say anything, but the silence in the room itched at me—pointing fingers that he was here because of me.
But I didn’t give a fuck about the guilt. All I wanted was for him to wake up.
“Everyone has been coming to visit you and bringing you cards and flowers. I told them you weren’t really a flower guy, but apparently, that’s what you get for a sick person. Do you want me to read some of the cards to you?” Only the sound of the monitors lingered in the air.
Wanting a distraction, I left his side to gather some of the cards before I eased back into the chair next to him. “So this one is from Gabe. It’s got a cute 3D teddy on the front holding balloons, and it says YOU BETTER GET WELL SOON, OR I AM GOING TO HAUNT YOU FOREVER. All in caps, might I add. That sounds more like a threat, doesn’t it?”
“This next one is from Lily. I think she made this herself—it’s got a manga version of a teenage boy who looks just like you; all blue eyes and black leather holding a young girl with purple hair. She says, ‘Come back to us, Emmie. We miss you. Love, your little sister- Li.’ Lily has been taking care of Strawberry, who has apparently been very fussy about being without her mom and dad. That was a cute card. You should definitely frame it. You’re lucky to have a sister like her,” I added, softly setting the card aside.
“Let’s see who the next one is from. It’s from the boys and Katy, and it’s red, your favorite color. Mikey says, ‘Katy forced me to write this. Just come back to us, man. I can’t handle all these lunatics by myself. Plus, you’re punishing your girl.’ Matty says, ‘Get well soon, I know you’ll come back to us.’ Lan says, ‘We need you, Em,’ and Katy says, ‘Emmie just come back to us already. I can’t wait anymore.’” Shaking my head, I dropped the card on the pile. “They really love you, but I think they’ll be kicking your ass when you wake up.”
“This is the last one. From Raphy and its girly pink—I think he did that on purpose. He says, (Evy- just read him this, and I swear he’ll wake up) ‘Man, now I finally get a chance at having your girl. I’ll love her better than you. (Did it work?) I’ll sacrifice my love if you wake up. I need my guitar teacher back. I swear I’ve been improving a lot, man. I can’t wait to show you. So get the fuck up!’ That’s the last one for today, and sadly, I have to inform Raphy that his little trick didn’t work.” I sighed, my eyes darting to him. “You’re still sleeping, aren’t you?”
Sliding the side rail of the hospital bed lower, I scooted closer to him and rested my head near his thigh, still holding his hand.
“You won’t be getting any card from me,” I mumbled, gliding my thumb along the back of his hand. “I’m mad at you, remember? You know, the other day, we had to lie that I was your wife because they wouldn’t let me see you otherwise. They wouldn’t even tell me what was wrong with you. I felt horrible at that moment, like dying—like it was not fair at all. I think we should get married soon. That way, you’re officially my family. But sometimes I wonder if you even want to. Even the other day, you got so weird when I told you I wanted babies. Don’t you want that anymore?” Another bout of silence passed as I played with his fingers, feeling all his calluses. “I miss home. I hate this hospital room. Even though it’s on the nicer side, it still smells like a hospital. Home won’t be home without you, though.”
“I agree,” a hoarse, dry voice cracked through the room, and I stilled. My eyes snapped to lock into a pair of blue eyes watching me.
“You’re awake?” I gaped.
“Yes,” he rasped before a bout of cough hit him. He grimaced, holding on to his abdomen .
I jumped to my feet. “Easy,” I whispered, rubbing slow circles down his back while I fed him spoonfuls of water. “Better?” I asked as his coughs subsided.
He nodded, giving me a small smile.
But I averted my gaze. “I’ll go call the nurse,” I said, stepping back.
“I’m fine. We can call them later.”
“No,” I snapped. “We need to inform everyone.” I waved a hand. “They need to know you woke up. Everyone’s been worried sick.”
And before he could answer, I bolted out. I just couldn’t stay there anymore. I felt like a live wire that could zap at any moment. The stress that had mounted on me so much in the past few days made me feel like I was going to burst at any moment.
It wasn’t long before the nurses rushed in to check on him, followed by Dr. Martin, who picked and prodded at him for a while, asking him a bunch of questions before he finally stated that he was perfectly fine.
Soon after they left, Mikey and a teary Lily rushed in. Lily dashed straight to her brother, hugging him tight. “You’re on my shit list.” She poked a finger at him but was beaming while muttering that she loved him.
“I’m fine, Li. I still have my toes and fingers,” Jay joked, wiping away her tears.
“Pig,” she mumbled.
“Thank God you woke up, man,” Mikey said, rolling his eyes as he hovered over Lily. “These two were unbearable without you.” These past few days had been weighing down on him badly . I was glad that beneath his exhaustion, his usual playfulness returned. I had a feeling he would crash the moment his head hit the pillow.
“I bet.” Jay chuckled, holding his stomach as his eyes dashed to me, but I quickly lowered them.
I could feel him frowning at me, but before he could say another word, the door swung open, and Lan, Matty, and Katy walked in. I backed up and took the spot next to the window as I watched them all dote on him.
He was lucky to have their love, and he deserved it more than anyone in this world.
Minutes later, Emily and Richard hurried in, and Emily started to cry, tackling Jay in an embrace while they spoke in hushed whispers.
Even a tired Tyler dropped by to check on him.
Eventually, they all got kicked out by a very angry nurse who insisted her patient needed rest and they were all disturbing him.
“What’s wrong?” Jay asked as soon as the room emptied.
“Nothing,” I replied, walking up to him. “Are you feeling okay?”
“Yes,” he whispered, circling my wrist. “But tell me what’s wrong?”
“I told you nothing is wrong.” I shrugged, tucking in his sheets. “You need to sleep.”
“I think I slept long enough, don’t you think?” A small smile curved up his pretty lips.
I gritted my teeth. “Don’t joke about it.”
“Sorry,” he mumbled, sighing. “But will you please look at me?”
I huffed out a breath, meeting his eyes. “What? ”
“Sit here.” He patted the side of his bed. “ Please. ”
I eased in beside him, and his fingers hooked under my chin, holding my gaze. “Are you alright?” he asked softly.
My teeth clattered as I shook my head. Suddenly, every emotion I held inside me crumbled, taking me along with it.
“Come here,” he said hoarsely, grabbing the back of my neck as he pulled me to his chest. My cheek touched his skin, and I shifted my weight, careful not to touch his plaster.
He ran his hand smoothly over my back. “It’s okay. I’m fine now.”
Something in me broke as the edges of my vision started to blur, and a sob left my lips. “You left me.” Tears started to stream down my cheeks as I leaned over and cupped his cheek. “Why would you do that to me?” I sobbed, “Leave me like that. Do you…know… how sca-scared I was?” I wailed, burying my face in his neck. “You don’t get to do that to me. I can’t lose you too. I can’t lose you like I’ve lost everyone else.”
“Fuck, don’t cry,” he rasped as his hand smoothed over my back. “I’m here now, and I’m not going anywhere.”
“And it’s all my fault,” I cried. “I did this to you.”
“You didn’t do anything to me. It was my choice to go in there. I don’t regret it, and I never will.”
His words reached my ears, but they did nothing to soothe the guilt and hurt gripping my heart.
“I’m so sorry, Jay,” I said in a broken whisper.
“I told you, Evelyn. It’s not your fault.”
But he didn’t know everything. All the things Dennis told me—he didn’t know. I needed to tell him; I needed to let him know that every fucked-up thing that ever happened in our life was because of me too.
“It was because of my moth…” I cleared my throat. “The woman who gave birth to me was actually…”
“Shush.” He placed a finger on my lips. “I know. She was his stepmother.”
“You do?” My eyes widened.
“Yes, I know everything. It wasn’t long before we put two and two together.” He ran a soft thumb over my wet cheek. “And I still don’t blame you. I never will. But all that’s over now, and we get to start over, okay?”
“For real this time?” I sniffled.
“For real,” he repeated, bringing my lips to his.
And for the first time in a long while, I truly believed it.
JAY
“She is knocked out cold, huh?” Mikey whispered as he entered the room and slowly shut the door behind him.
“Yeah,” I said softly as my gaze swept over the woman lying on my chest. God, she was beautiful. Even with her wild hair, dark circles, and pale skin, she was the most stunning sight. My heart still hurt at the way she cried last night. She must have been so scared trying to just hold on her own. Her busted lip only made me want to destroy that fucker all over again.
“She took it hard.” His gaze softened as he plopped down on the seat next to the bed. “Wouldn’t eat. Wouldn’t sleep. Wouldn’t even shower except for that one time. ”
I sighed, tightening my grip around her. She felt so small in my arms, almost as if she had lost half herself in just a few days, and it was only breaking my heart.
“When the fuck are they letting me out of here?” I shifted in the uncomfortable bed. I still hadn’t gotten up, except for the one time the doctor made me. But my back was killing me. I just wanted to be back home in my own bed with my girl by my side.
“Not sure. Hopefully later today.”
I nodded. It was still the early hours of the morning, so I had to wait it out a bit. “What’s the news on the outside?”
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Well, as for the outside world, you’ve been in an accident, and we put out a statement that you are perfectly fine and have been shifted home so the crowd outside would clear out. As for the other matter, the cops need a statement from both of you to tie everything up. But he’s already facing two counts of murder charges and an attempted one.”
“Fuck, later on that please. I can’t deal with it now.”
“Yeah, it’s no rush.” He yawned, rising to his feet. “I’ll go ask if they can discharge you any earlier. I’ll be a lot less worried if you’re at home.”
“Did you even get any sleep?”
He gave me a playful smile. “Not when your sorry ass gave us a scare.”
“Thank you,” I said, my voice thick with emotion. “For keeping an eye on her and for everything.”
“You don’t ever have to thank me, brother.” He grinned before closing the door behind him .
I watched as the early morning light seeped through the thin curtains. Every breath I took felt a bit clearer, feeling like all the poison that’s been infecting our lives had finally been sucked out clean.
In the end, the only thing that mattered was her.
And I had her with me.
I can’t wait to give her the world—this time, free from the reins of our past.
EVY
“Jay, will you calm the fuck down and sit? You just had surgery,” I chided, trying hard to pull the brick of muscles back to bed, but he wouldn’t fucking listen.
Even Strawberry was barking, standing over the threshold like a guard. It’d only been a day since he was discharged, and he was already getting on my last nerve.
“Evelyn, I’m going to go get myself some water. Not committing any crime.” Jay pinned me with a stare, swatting my hand away, which made me plop back into the bed instead.
Even weak, he was so damn strong, or maybe I had gotten so weak. I didn’t know if it was because I had hardly gotten any sleep or because I sat in a plastic chair for too long, but my entire body hurt.
My back felt like a stiff board with pins and needles running all over my body.
“I can go and get that for you,” I replied, huffing out a breath as I dragged myself out of bed .
“You stay right here.” He pointed at the bed, and in a quick stride, he was right before my face. “Evelyn, I know I got shot and had surgery, but you also went through something traumatic,” he said softly. “You got kidnapped at gunpoint, for Christ’s sake, and I can tell how tired you are. No one is forcing you to be this hard on yourself.”
“But I’m fine.” I folded my arms, matching his stance. “I feel perfectly fine.”
Just then, his phone started to ring, and he let out a frustrated breath and picked it up. “Hello?” He frowned, running a hand through his hair. “Now?” He paused, nodding to whatever the person on the other end was saying.
I tried to tune in on the conversation, but I couldn’t hear a thing.
“Fine,” he said, hanging up.
“Who was that?” I arched a brow.
He sighed. “The cops need a statement. They’ll be here in ten. Do you think that’s something you can handle, or do you want me to push it off till later?”
I swallowed, caught off guard. “I think I can. I just want to be done with all this.”
“Good.” He pressed a kiss to my forehead. “Now it looks like we both have to go downstairs.”
I rolled my eyes. “You get to win this once. No more walking up and down the stairs, Jay. It’s only going to cause unnecessary strain that might rip out your stitches.” I gave him the lecture as we slowly descended the stairs.
“You should also add in a nurse costume while you’re at it.” He waved a hand at me. “It would complete the whole look. ”
“Mentally ignoring you,” I commented, not looking back as I walked ahead to the kitchen. Opening the fridge, I retrieved the pitcher of creamy strawberry agua fresca I had made for him earlier and poured a large glass.
“Drink this.” I pushed the glass toward him just as he arrived.
“Thanks.” He smiled, leaning against the counter as he chugged it in one go. “Fuck, this is good. Can I have more?”
“Nope.” I shook my head, dropping the glass in the sink. “You need to eat healthy till you recover.”
He groaned. “When did you become the diet police?”
Before I could respond, a throat cleared behind us.
Tyler walked in sporting his usual cool expression, escorting two men in suits who introduced themselves as Detective Simon and Ronald.
Soon, they took detailed statements from both of us and were very kind and considerate, unlike the rude detectives who once interviewed me back in LA.
It was well over an hour later when they left, and I was exhausted from the questioning and reliving all that happened.
But lightness filled my blood, knowing it was all over this time, and we didn’t even have to go to court. Dennis was going away for good, and this wouldn’t affect us anymore.
“Do you want to know about her?” Jay asked a moment later.
We were on the couch still in the same spot as we watched the fluffy clouds drift by outside. “Silas sent me a file on everything, so if you wish to know, you can. ”
My pulse ticked; I knew exactly who he was asking about—my mother. “Dennis said I looked just like her,” I whispered, swallowing. “I think I want to.”
He nodded, pulled out his iPad from the coffee table, and fiddled with it before handing it to me.
My trembling fingers took it from him while my eyes landed on my mirror image staring back at me. Dennis wasn’t lying for once, from her brown hair to her eyes—she looked just like me, only more weary, bony, and sick.
“Her name was Meera,” Jay added, sympathy crossing his face. “She was, umm, a…”
“A prostitute and a drug addict?” I laughed dryly. “Yeah, I think I got that memo. No wonder Grandma hated her.”
“We still don’t know who your father is. She married David when you were six, so I think it’s unlikely we’ll know.”
I took one last look at her before I handed it back to him.
“I don’t want to know. I think I’m fine without knowing that. And you know what?” I smiled, scooting closer as I circled my arms around him. “She may look like me, but she’s nothing like me. All I see is a lost woman who couldn’t appreciate life. I’m not that. I can never be like that.”
“Yes, you aren’t.” He dropped a quick kiss on my nose.
I sighed, cuddling closer to him. “Wait.” I looked up at him, scrunching my nose. “How the hell did Dennis end up working for Dorian?”
He sighed. “Dorian used to be his father’s biggest client—owed him a favor and took him after David committed suicide. ”
“Guess he repaid that favor. I still can’t believe he killed him.” Goosebumps sprang out of my skin just thinking about it.
“Let’s not ever talk about this anymore.” He placed a kiss on my head before dragging it all over my face.
A hiss escaped me when he met my broken lips.
“Fuck, sorry. Does it still hurt?” he whispered, sliding a soft finger along.
“A bit,” I mumbled.
His eyes glazed as they swept over my face. “Are you okay, though? Really okay? I know nothing fucking happened, but still, it’s not every day you get kidnapped.”
“I know, and I’m going to sound like a broken record, but I’m really fine.”
Everything made sense now. The questions I had in my head and reasoning, the why that haunted me, were all wrapped up into one twisted story. It makes me think about the generational trauma that I inherited for no apparent reason, and at this moment, I choose to forgive her—forgive me , even though it wasn’t my fault. I chose to let it go because the past would no longer dictate my future, and it certainly wasn’t what I wanted to blindly continue onto my children.
I refused to do that.
I may not know how to be a mother, but I will try every single day to be a much better one than my mother was to me.
“What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” Jay ruffled my hair.
“Nothing.” I yawned into my palms. “Do you think it’s a little too early for sleep?” My eyes cast to the setting sun outside .
“Not at all.” He smiled, lacing his fingers with mine. “Come on, let’s go.”
That night, I fell asleep warm, safe, and content in the arms of my love—hopeful.