Chapter 10 Zach
TEN
ZACH
“Lookah, I’m bored.” I put my phone down and gave the dog a good head scratch, as I let out a big sigh.
There was only so much doomscrolling a person could do before they wanted to rip their eyes out. I never want to look at another influencer in my life ever again.
I was simply not the kind of person to sit on my ass all day and do nothing.
I’ve been dreaming of running my own bakery all my life, through the ups and the downs.
Even though it’s only been a year and some change since I’ve started working myself to the ground, it’s become my new normal.
That was clearly evident from how much I couldn’t stand being surrounded by four walls, no matter how cozy they were.
At least when Dare was here he kept my mind busy.
Between his beautiful personality and those chest hairs that managed to poke out of whatever he was wearing, giving me a taste of the bear underneath, I was never bored.
I mean, he wasn’t the most convenient distraction thanks to the constant boner I was sporting, but it was better than the alternative.
I glanced out the window, at the sun trying to peek through the heavy clouds and bit my lip.
“Should we…” I mumbled and Lookah’s left ear shot up as he tilted his head to the side. He made me laugh.
I looked out again. I swallowed a frog in my throat. Chewed the inside of my lip. Pondered over it some more.
It was safe out there. We were in the middle of Hummingbird County. There wasn’t another soul for miles. Nothing bad was going to happen.
Or, nothing worse than what already happened.
“Okay. Let’s do it, Lookah. Let’s go for a…” I started and the dog tilted his head again. “Walk!” I announced and he jumped to his feet.
The goats, who had been curled up in a bundle on the other side of me, bleeped loudly and followed Lookah’s example.
Lookah, for his part, ran in circles around me, pausing every few rounds to put his paws on my knees as if telling me to hurry the fuck up. I couldn’t help but smile.
Steve, the beige pygmy, headbutted my leg, before Eve took over and kept going until I got off my ass.
“Dare wasn’t lying, huh. You are bossy!” I told Eve, and turned to Lookah who had sat on his back legs staring at me. “And you’re such a good doggie,” I told him. “Come on. Let’s go.”
I put my shoes on, threw my jacket over my shoulders and opened the door, letting out the herd. Lookah ran out ahead, followed by Eve and Adam with Steve leaving last. Each goat dropped poops as they walked, without a care in the world.
Despite the dirty job of picking up crap, I couldn’t help but fill my lungs with fresh air, turn my ears to the direction of the birdsongs, and chase after the animals as they took me around the back and toward the nearest acre of blueberry plants.
The further away we got, the easier it became to breathe and I felt my shoulder relax. Despite the biting cold and condensation blowing out my mouth, I felt rejuvenated.
“See? I knew it was safe around here,” I told Steve. He was keeping me company, walking next to me and he gave me an affectionate headbutt that earned him an ear scratch or two.
I looked at one of the plants. It was devoid of color and fruit, just a bunch of branches, with some with dying red leaves still attached. Everything was truly in hibernation. Nothing much to see but even so, the endless land of slumbering blueberry plants was quite the sight to behold.
“Lookah! Come on, boy. Time to head back,” I said after a little while.
I wasn’t sure how long it had been as I’d been silly enough to leave my phone at the house, but my toes were starting to feel numb, so it was probably best we got back into the warmth of Dare’s home.
We didn’t even make it a step inside when Dare grabbed me by the shoulders and wrapped his arms around me, making me freeze on the spot. My lungs stopped working, my vision went hazy and all I could do was stand there and blink.
“Where have you been? I’ve been worried sick!” he said and I tried to answer but my body had shut down.
It’s okay, Zach. It’s all okay. It’s Dare. It’s just Dare. He’s not going to hurt you.
I repeated it over and over in my head until the rest of my body believed me and took me out of this daze while Dare kept searching my eyes for answers.
“I…I’m sorry,” I mumbled when I found the energy to string two words together.
“Are you okay? You look terrified,” he asked, and cupped my cheek for a fleeting moment, which made me feel a little warmer than before.
“Y-yeah. I…you just…you startled me,” I said.
“I’m so sorry.” He took a step back and I caught him biting his lip.
I hated that he felt like he needed to put some distance between us, but my nervous system appreciated it because it relaxed even more.
“It’s okay. It’s not your fault—you were worried.”
He looked down and pursed his lips.
“I was. I thought that fucker had found you here or something.” I shook my head. “Where did you go?”
I glanced down at the dog and goats and closed the door behind me.
“I didn’t mean to worry you. I just walked the field for some fresh air. I forgot to take my phone.”
Dare reached for my shoulder and gave it a squeeze.
“It’s okay. Just…maybe next time leave me a note or something.” He removed his hand and put it on his chest, and I narrowed my eyes, asking a question with my gaze. “I told you I was worried,” he explained.
I took a step closer and put my hand over his, on his chest, and the world became a hundred times smaller. A rapid and thunderous pounding against my palm made me shake all the way to my core and my throat tightened. He didn’t say anything, just stared at me.
“I’m so sorry,” I whispered, not wanting to break the sanctity of this moment and our proximity. “I didn’t mean to give you a heart attack.”
“You didn’t,” he whispered back. “But almost.” He smiled.
I smiled too.
He sighed. His breath blew warm on my face, making me shiver. I held my own breath fearing what might happen if I so much as moved a hair follicle.
Thankfully, Lookah decided this was the moment to get some affection from his daddy because he came between us and tried to climb up Dare’s chest. When Dare obliged and got down on his knees, I got some much needed oxygen and put some distance between us.
“Hungry? I can start on lunch,” I said in one breath, then checked the time on my phone. “Or early dinner. Wow. I didn’t realize I’d been out so long.”
I walked to the kitchen and Dare stopped playing with Lookah so he could glare at me.
“What?” I asked.
“Stop,” he said.
I frowned and put my hands in the air, unsure what I’d done wrong.
“You’ve already done so much. You don’t need to cook for me every day.” He got back up and approached me. “You’re not my maid, you know.”
“I know.” I smirked. “But I like look—keeping busy.”
Had I almost said I liked looking after him? Crap.
“I know, but you don’t need to go through the trouble. You should be resting.”
I quirked up an eyebrow. “I’m not sick, you know. Besides, I’m used to being on my feet all day and you work hard every day, so it’s the least I can do in return for your hospitality.”
Dare seemed to consider my words for a moment but then he shook his head and pushed me aside with his hips. I stumbled backwards. He smiled and I laughed. I put my hands up in surrender and let him get on with dinner.
“Steak all right with you?” he asked.
“Sure is,” I answered and watched him as he washed his hands, took a steak out and lit up the grill pan.
“I have a job for you,” he said looking down at Lookah who was searching for any opportunity to steal a piece of meat off the counter.
“Yes, chef. What can I do?”
“Feed this bastard so he leaves me alone for two seconds?” he said, chuckling and I saluted him.
“You got it, chef,” I said.
Twenty minutes later, the food was ready, and I was sitting at the kitchen island opening up a red wine while Dare washed up.
He came back into the room with a lit candle, giving our meal an immediate date vibe.
I wasn’t sure if that had been his goal, but I couldn’t help but bite my lip to stop myself from ogling at him under candlelight.
But there was only so long I could do that when I had to serve him a glass of wine. After we were both settled, we clinked our glasses.
“Thank you for doing this,” I told him as I set the glass down and grabbed the knife and fork.
“It’s okay. I can whip up a steak in no time.”
“That’s not what I meant. I meant this. Bringing me here. Letting me stay here and invade your space.”
“Pfft, you’re not invading anything. If anything I should be thanking you for the company. I forgot what it was like to have someone around.”
I nodded, staring at my food.
“You…you don’t have someone?” I mumbled.
“What? Like a boyfriend?” he asked with a bemused expression.
Was that his way of confirming his sexuality to me? Was he sending me a message or was I a party of one in this delusion?
“Or family.” I shrugged. “You never talk about yourself.”
“Ditto,” he said with a raised eyebrow, and I pursed my lips.
“Fair point. Although…you know about Victor now, so that’s something.”
“Ouch. You’re starting with Victor? The douchebag? What about your family?”
“I don’t…I don’t really have one. Well, I do but they want nothing to do with me. So I’m all on my own.” I offered a big smile to compensate for the sad statement, but it didn’t work.
Dare frowned and his bottom lip curled, and I felt like a dick for ruining the mood.
“I’m sorry. Is-is that because of the gay thing?”
“Yeah. That and I didn’t want to follow in my parents’ footsteps of being a big-shot lawyer or doctor or whatever. But mainly, it’s the gay thing.”
Dare reached his hand across the counter and covered mine, causing an explosion of goosebumps along my arm.
“I’m sorry,” he said, giving me a squeeze.
“It’s okay. I’m over it,” I lied.