Chapter 5 #2
“Oh wow, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for you to feel that way. Perhaps I’m wrong…”
“You might be a lot of things, including extremely tardy for dinner, but I don’t think you’re wrong about this.”
That had every single one of us turning to see that at some point, Derek had joined us. How a man that large could stand unnoticed was a question for another day. My only concern was that I couldn’t seem to get the answer to the only question that mattered to me.
“Go ahead, angel, have some mercy and put Dr. Berringer out of his misery,” he instructed, moving forward enough to wrap his arms around his wife.
Sadie took a breath and asked, “When was the last time Hazel was naughty?”
I hadn’t been expecting another question and this one totally threw me. “Naughty? I don’t think she’s ever been naughty. At least not around me.”
“Why do you think that is?”
I felt like I was a contestant on some sort of game show who knew they were definitely not in the running to win a prize. “Because she’s good?”
Sadie’s huff was so explosive, it lifted a strand of hair off her forehead. “A good what?”
“Woman?” Even I could hear how tentative that answer was, but I didn’t bother to try again.
“Exactly!”
Looking over Sadie’s head, I met Derek’s gaze. “How about helping a guy out?”
“What kind of guy?”
Derek’s question had me willing to swear I’d fallen into some rabbit hole that hadn’t made the cut in Lewis Carroll’s book. “Seeing as you two have all the answers, you tell me.”
Okay, that was rude, but seriously, how much was a man expected to take?
“Daddy, I think he really is clueless,” Sadie noted and then added, “Not that it’s your fault, Dr. Berringer.
I mean, I guess we never stopped to consider anything because, well, because we all know Hazel and figured it was pretty obvious.
And, well, your brother is Master Berringer and your sister-in-law is Brooke and—”
“And I don’t need a listing of my family tree, Sadie. I need to know what I did that was so awful that Hazel no longer wants to have anything to do with me.”
“But that’s just it, she very much does but she thinks she’s not the person you want her to be.”
“That’s ridiculous. She’s exactly who I want her to be.”
“As fascinating as this has been, I’ve got buns in the oven that are going to burn if this goes on any longer,” Julie said. “What they are saying is that Hazel isn’t a Little—”
“So?”
“So? She means Hazel isn’t like me. Well, me when I’m Little,” Sadie said.
“I know that!”
“You do? Since when?” Julie popped up to ask.
“Since the moment I met her. For god’s sake, why would she think I’d think otherwise?”
Julie shrugged, “All I know is that she thinks you’re a Daddy looking for a Little.”
“How could she think that? It’s not like I’m clueless about Littles.
I’m from England, not outer space. We have clubs there and many of the members are Littles.
” I shot a glance at Sadie who seemed totally unconcerned by the side-eye.
“Granted, from what I’ve seen since I’ve been here, Rawhide Littles seem to be far more active than most I’ve met when it comes to pulling pranks or bratting in order to get their arses smacked, but I don’t see what that has to do with… ”
Well, hell.
Hazel hadn’t been asking why I hadn’t spanked her, at least not in that context. She’d been trying to get me to explain that the reason I hadn’t was because she wasn’t what she’d thought I wanted.
“And there’s the lightbulb,” Julie exclaimed. “The point is that while it’s as clear as day to me that you definitely have the heart of a Daddy, first and foremost you’re a Dominant. But doesn’t mean it’s clear to Hazel.”
“Haven’t you two discussed anything?” Sadie asked as if she couldn’t believe I’d been so remiss. “I mean, you’ve been dating for a few months. Haven’t you gotten naked and done the—”
“That’s not something you need to know,” Derek said, cutting her off.
“Even if they haven’t, it doesn’t matter. What is obvious is that they haven’t really talked, am I right or am I right?” Julie asked, giving me a look that told me she wasn’t going to believe any bullshit excuses.
“Yes, you’re right, on both points,” I admitted.
“Then why are you still standing there? Go find Hazel and tell her she’s been worrying about nothing and if she still refuses to believe you love her for her, then by all that is holy, spank some sense into her because if you’re a real Dom and not just a wannabe, you’ll know that spankings are not limited to Littles. Got it?”
It felt as if a weight had lifted off my chest and I finally could grin even if it was a bit shaky. If only it were that easy. I had reasons for not going all Dommy on Hazel, but that was a conversation for only the two of us, so I just said, “Got it. Thanks, Julie.”
“Don’t mention it. Oh, and Master Derek, now that you’re here, do you want to just eat in?”
“That’ll be fine,” Derek said.
“Thank goodness. Now I won’t spend a sleepless night thinking of how awful microwaved hamburgers can be. It will just take a moment,” she said, grabbing the two bags and disappearing into the kitchen only to stick her head out and say, “And Sadie, I think you make a great actress!”
“Thanks, Julie.” Sadie gave a small curtsy that had her Daddy chuckling.
And with that, Julie was gone, leaving the three of us standing there. I felt like a dunce but Sadie didn’t take advantage of that fact. Instead, she smiled and patted my arm. “I guess it would have been easier for you if I just came out and told you.”
“You think?” I asked, my brow lifting, causing her to giggle. “Regardless, Sadie, thanks for trying. I just don’t understand how I could have made Hazel feel that way or why she was too scared to just tell me herself.”
“Maybe because you met her at a tea party attended by a bunch of Littles who not only looked guilty, but were a bit uneasy because, well, you know, the stolen pregnancy tests and all that.”
“Stolen?”
I was glad it was Derek picking up on that not me, because it gave me a chance to watch someone who definitely was a Little from the top of her head to her cute little toes squirm a bit.
Once again proving that Hazel was exactly who I’d thought she was from the very start.
A woman who ached to submit. Not as a Little, but as someone born to be a natural submissive.
“The tests were most likely free samples from one of the medical supply houses, so no worries.”
Sadie practically beamed at me. “And all that disrespect and rudeness was only to try to make a point, so no worries there either, right Dr. Berringer?”
“Well…”
Her eyes widened. “Hey, you can’t go all Daddy-like now!”
I chuckled and reached out to give her a hug. “No worries. Thanks, and don’t forget, dinner out wherever you two would like and it’s on me.”
“Thanks!”
Derrick gave me a look that said we’d be continuing the discussion out of the hearing of Little ears and I just nodded, respecting the man far too much to question his judgment.
It was only after they’d slid into another booth to await their dinner and I left to walk outside did I realize I had another problem.
The fact that her car was no longer parked in the lot next to the lodge let me know she’d hightailed it off the Ranch.
For the first time, I wished Hazel was a Little, if only because it would just take me a few minutes to reach the Littles’ Dorm.
She could have lived in the university dorms or on Rawhide Ridge, but the fact was that Hazel’s home was a garage apartment in Porter’s Corner.
Even for me, that was a bit too far to walk tonight.
It had gotten colder, so I pulled the collar of my jacket up around my neck and stuck my hands in the pockets.
The moon was out and I took a long moment to simply look up at the billions of stars twinkling against the midnight blue of the sky.
I’d been to a lot of places around the globe, but never had the sky seemed so close or as immense as it did in Montana.
A sudden flare of light appeared, and as I tracked its arc across the heavens, I made a vow.
No matter how long it took, or how many conversations were required, I’d convince Hazel she didn’t have to work at being anything other than what she was. An incredible woman.
The past hour had me realizing I’d been doing the exact same thing as Sadie.
While definitely not as entertaining or obvious, I’d been equivocating with Hazel in an effort to spare her discomfort of any sort.
Instead, I’d caused her stress without even meaning to.
If I’d just been honest, all this angst wouldn’t have caused the sadness I’d seen in my girl’s eyes.
I lifted a hand to wave at Tiago who was manning the gate.
He waved back but didn’t say anything as if he knew I was deep in thought.
By the time I was within sight of the turn off to the road leading to Rawhide Ridge, I heard tires pulling onto the gravel shoulder behind me. I turned to see Lawson’s jeep.
“Want a lift?” my brother asked.
I didn’t even hesitate. “Thanks, but I think I’ll walk.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah, I’ve got some thinking to do.”
Lawson nodded and then tossed something at me. Reflexes had me catching what turned out to be a pair of gloves.
“You might be some endurance runner, but, Baby B, you live in Montana now. Even that fuzz on your face isn’t going to keep you warm. Frostbite isn’t some rare thing out here.”
“Thanks,” I said, pulling the gloves on and instantly appreciating the warmth they provided. “You better hope Moira’s baby is a girl because if Georgie hears you calling me that, he’s gonna be sad.”
“Naw, he’s made of strong Montana stock. Even if he winds up the only boy with a dozen sisters, he’ll protect them with his life. Oh, and Derek said we need to talk.”
“Did he now?”
“Yep, and when Derek suggests a meeting—”
“You don’t show up late.”
“Exactly! Breakfast tomorrow in the café. He’s already checked with Quincy to make sure any patients who can’t be taken care of by him are rescheduled for later in the day.”
That had me giving my brother a long look.
I wasn’t actually surprised he’d found me on the side of the road.
I figured Tiago wasn’t as silent as I’d thought.
Hearing Lawson had spoken to Derek didn’t come as a shock either.
The people of Rawhide were individuals but they were first and foremost a community.
But involving Quincy meant that whatever subject Derek wanted to discuss wasn’t one that could just be chatted over and considered done.
Still, I nodded. “Okay, thanks. See you in the morning.”
“Sounds good, night, Nigel.”
I waited until he’d made a U-turn and headed back the way he’d come before I reached into my coat pocket to pull out my phone.
Robyn—I won’t be down for breakfast in the morning. Since I’m your only guest till the weekend, I say take advantage and let your rooster make you crow. Nigel
I’d taken only a dozen steps before my phone dinged.
Cock-a-doodle-do!!! Love, Robyn.
My grin was brief as I sent another text.
Hazel, I just want you to know that no matter what, I’ve got you—forever and always. Yours, Nigel.
Only then was I able to start walking again, knowing that truer words had never been spoken. Even if she decided against continuing with me, all she’d ever have to do is call my name and I’d be there for her until the day I died.