Chapter 2
CHAPTER 2
A delaide hated leaving Mabel for any length of time.
It was hard to do so, especially when she was nursing, which made the shelter Dot had created so special. They had a wet nurse available for the babies if the mothers had to work, but they also helped the women find work placements with sympathetic owners who would only require them for a few hours at a time instead of the usual long shifts.
Four hours still felt long to Adelaide, but she appreciated the opportunity to try to collect enough money to start her new life.
The life she had always longed for.
Even if doing so was laced with some melancholy for what it would mean leaving behind.
She had wanted a life with Michael. For a few weeks after Mabel’s birth, she even thought they could be married and had only been waiting for him to ask again.
But that question had never come.
And then she had come to the ultimate realization – that he didn’t truly want her but had only been trying to do the right thing.
So here she was, working for her coin at another tavern, even though she would rather be elsewhere.
But at least this time, she was getting paid what she was worth.
“What can I get you?” she asked one of the patrons, ably dodging the hand that reached for her hip. She had learned long ago how to spurn unwanted advances.
She had only ever answered one proposition affirmatively – and look where that had gotten her.
“I’ll be having an ale, and…” The man’s eyes wandered down to her bosom, which was as covered as it could be with the way her breasts had grown.
“Coming right up,” she said, turning around, running into a body standing so close and silently behind her that she couldn’t have evaded him if she had tried.
When the man didn’t move, she ignored him, providing him no attention as she moved to step around him, but she was stopped short when a hand reached out and roughly grabbed her arm.
“What, no love for a family reunion?” she heard in her ear as his hot, stinking breath on her neck caused her to shudder in revulsion.
“Jack?” she said in disbelief, stepping back and looking up. “What are you doing here?”
“Is that any way to greet your brother?” he asked, his eyes narrowing on her as they always did when he was angry. “It’s been a long time.”
“Not long enough,” she muttered under her breath. “How did you know I was here?”
“People talk.” He shrugged. “Imagine how surprised I was to find that my sister was working for someone else. A competitor.”
“This tavern is far enough from yours that it does not compete for business with you. And I am not really your sister.”
He clutched a hand against his chest. “You wound me.”
“Can we talk about this later? I have a job to do. And while I do not wait on all of the tables in this tavern – unlike in the past – these people deserve good service.”
“Where’s your baby?”
Adelaide’s heart caught in her chest. She hadn’t told her brother anything about the baby. All he had known was that she was expecting one with Michael. She had put up with so much from him over the years, but this was where she had to stop, to protect Mabel.
“There… there is no baby,” she said, hoping he would believe the lie, as awful as it felt to tell. But he had never been overly adept at reading emotions.
“Oh, so sad,” he said, no hint of sorrow in his tone. “Well, no reason why you cannot return to The Red Lion.”
He hadn’t even been original when naming his tavern, choosing the same name as half the taverns in England.
“I will not be returning to The Red Lion,” she said, trying to brush past him again, but he held so firmly onto her arm that she was sure she would have bruises tomorrow.
“Why not?”
“Because you didn’t pay me nearly what I deserved, and you often mistreated me,” she said calmly. “Excuse me now, I would like to do my job.”
“I—” His grip tightened, and his other hand drew into a fist. He wouldn’t do anything physical here before so many witnesses, would he? Before she could try to evade him, however, the big, burly figure of the tavern owner appeared over his shoulder and Adelaide sighed in relief.
“Is something the matter here?” asked Matts. He and his wife, Susie, who owned this place, were some of the loveliest people Adelaide had ever met. She would be forever grateful for the opportunity they had provided her.
“This is my brother,” Adelaide said through gritted teeth. “And he was just leaving.”
She eyed him in warning, but he was not a complete fool. Matts stood a head above him, likely two stones heavier. Most of the patrons here would also be loyal to him.
That didn’t mean Jack would give up entirely.
“I will leave now,” he said but returned to Adelaide, needing to add his parting words. “I will be back, though, Adelaide. If not here, then elsewhere. Don’t forget that I know a lot about you. Wouldn’t want those secrets to get out, now would we?”
With a leering grin, he turned and left, although Matts stood before her, arms crossed over his chest.
“Is he an issue for you?” he asked gruffly. “I can ensure he doesn’t return here, but is there anything else you need?”
“It’s fine,” Adelaide said with what she hoped was a nonchalant wave of her hand. “I can handle him.”
“That’s Jack Tate, no?” Matts said, raising an eyebrow. “He’s not the most well-liked of tavern owners. We’ve had people come here after working for him, and they do not exactly sing his praises.”
“I can understand why,” she said with a grimace.
“It’s not only that,” Matts said, staring down at her as though trying to decide what to say.
She didn’t want to think about what else he could have heard.
“There have been rumors that The Red Lion is more than just a tavern.”
“What do you mean?”
“That your brother runs some… let’s just say, less legitimate business out of it.”
“He’s not my real brother,” she exclaimed, knowing that was not the most important matter Matts had raised, but needing to distance herself from his accusations, for she had an inkling of what he was suggesting. She had never wanted to admit the truth, even to herself, but distance had created some clarity.
“Our parents married,” she continued in a rush. “But he is the only family I still have besides my daughter.”
“I see,” Matts said, even though he obviously didn’t understand. “Well, it’s your life, Adelaide, but I would be remiss not to recommend staying away from him.”
She nodded and continued with her work, even as her heart pounded.
For while Matts had slightly confused her, she knew exactly what Jack was talking about and that he wouldn’t hesitate to use her mother’s past if it was going to get him what he wanted, which was, apparently, her.
Her secrets weren’t why she had left Michael.
But they were undoubtedly reasons she shouldn’t return – at least, not for good.
Despite everything he had been and all he had previously enjoyed, Michael was a good man. One who didn’t deserve to be cut entirely out of his daughter’s life.
She had thought long and hard about what Dot had said, and she knew the right thing to do.
Even if it would hurt more than she’d like to do it.
Michael felt like the ultimate failure whenever he returned home to his brother’s townhouse.
He didn’t even have his own place to reside.
He had previously lived in his own set of apartments, but he had given them up last year when he had discovered Adelaide’s pregnancy and insisted that she come live with him so that he could take care of her.
Well, his brother had first convinced him to look after her and the baby, but once Michael had decided he would be part of their lives, he was all in.
He didn’t do much in half measures.
He had tried to sneak her into his apartment, but it was an establishment for gentlemen only, and he was not nearly as covert as he had imagined himself to be. When she was discovered exiting his rooms the very second day after she had arrived, he was told Adelaide could not stay and he had to take the only option available – to live with his brother.
Fortunately, Edward had married Dot partway through Adelaide’s pregnancy, and his brother was much more bearable with his wife at his side. He no longer judged Michael’s every action, which was a miracle in itself, although he still seemed to hold his breath every time Michael opened his mouth.
Michael supposed it was time to find an apartment again, but he had been hoping that instead, he would be seeking a home for him and his family.
Adelaide’s pregnancy had been difficult for her, but he had hoped that once the baby came, they could find a way forward. Together.
Instead, she had disappeared.
He knew that Dot was aware of where she now lived, but she refused to provide him any information, although she had promised to speak on his behalf.
He would have to be satisfied with that.
He was relieved to find the house empty, which made sense given that it was still mid-afternoon and his sister-in-law was usually busy at the shelter for women she and Edward had established. He retreated through the house to his bedchamber to change to visit the stables, to immerse himself into his only true passion, one that he had retreated to when Adelaide had shut him out.
He had just reached his room when he heard a noise from below. He dismissed the sound as servants until he heard the murmur of voices that seemed far too familiar.
“Michael?” Dot’s voice rang out. “Are you home?”
He retraced his steps until he stood at the top of the landing.
“I just returned,” he said, unable to see her at the bottom, although she couldn’t be far. “Is all well?”
“Yes,” she said. Was that… joy in her voice? “Will you come down for a moment? I have a surprise for you.”
Little did she know that no surprise could make him happy at this point.
But she had done so much for him, he could at least indulge her.
His steps were heavy as he descended the stairs. When his head lifted toward Dot at the bottom, he could only stop and stare with shock.
For there, in front of him, stood his whole heart.
“Adelaide.” His jaw dropped as his shock overtook every other emotion. He wondered if he had conjured an illusion, for this seemed too good to be true. “What are you doing here?”
She was as beautiful as ever, taking his very breath away. Her hair was not down around her shoulders as he preferred but was pulled back loosely away from her face. He supposed that was to account for the baby in her arms.
His baby.
“We are here to see you, but it doesn’t seem as if you are particularly pleased by our arrival,” she said, raising an eyebrow, her expression guarded.
“I—of course I am!” he exclaimed, the words tripping off his tongue. “I am shocked, that is all.”
“I apologize; this is my fault,” Dot interjected, stepping forward. “I visited Adelaide yesterday and suggested that she allow you to visit with Mabel, and she decided today was as good of a time as any.”
“To get it over with,” he said with a humorless smile, following her thoughts.
“I’m sure that’s not—” Dot began, but Adelaide nodded, her lips pressed together in a firm line.
“Yes,” she said shortly, causing Michael’s heart to sink below his stomach.
She was not here for him.
She was not coming back to him.
She was only here because Dot had guilted her into it.
And he was desperate enough to overlook that and take what he was given.
When he finally convinced himself to tear his eyes away from Adelaide, it was only to move them down to the baby.
She had grown so much since he had last seen her. He knew exactly how long it had been.
Three months.
Three months since he had last seen the two of them. Three months since he had held either of them in his arms.
He could still picture every moment of Mabel’s birth.
It had been an agonizing few hours, listening to Adelaide as she labored, until he had forced his way into the room, unable to take the inaction any longer.
When she had allowed him in, he had sat next to her, holding her in his arms, wishing he could take away all of her pain.
And then Mabel had emerged. When Dot had placed her in Adelaide’s arms and Michael held the two of them together, it was like the entire world had finally begun to make sense. All his experiences seemed worth it at that moment, for they had all led to this.
He had envisioned them making a life together as a family.
For two weeks, they had been happy.
Then she had left as though it had meant nothing, without a word or explanation.
Mabel had been so tiny then, not much more than the size of his hands, and now she was the length of Adelaide’s arms.
“Can I… can I hold her?” he asked, looking up to meet Adelaide’s eyes, wary of doing so, fearing what he might find there.
But he saw only compassion, and she nodded curtly.
“Perhaps we should sit down?”
She didn’t trust him to hold the baby, but he didn’t blame her. He didn’t entirely trust himself, either.
They walked together into the front parlor, Dot stopping at the door.
“I’ll give you a few minutes,” she said before backing out and closing the door behind her, leaving them alone together.
It was like she had pulled all the air out of the room as they sat together in silence, opposite to how they had been when they first met, when Adelaide had first come to live with him before the melancholy had taken over her.
“Are you well?” he finally asked, not asking what he truly wanted to, but also not wanting to scare her away.
“I am, yes,” she said, standing and walking over to the sofa where he sat.
“Would you like to hold her now?” she asked.
“Very much so,” he said, positioning his arms how he thought he should take Mabel.
Adelaide leaned down and gently laid the baby in them.
Adelaide’s familiar scent of lemon mingled with the lavender he assumed was attached to the baby.
When Adelaide straightened and returned to her sofa, he expected to feel bereft at the loss of her presence, but he had no chance to feel that, for he was too overtaken with Mabel.
His baby.
He stared down at her in wonder as she blinked up at him in surprise. He wondered if she had seen any man besides him – and perhaps Edward.
He hoped not.
She was beautiful. At that moment, he knew he would do anything for her, give anything for her, and renounce anything to ensure she was happy.
He didn’t know how long he just stared down at her until he heard the smallest of creaks that must have been Adelaide shifting on the sofa.
He finally looked up, catching her eye.
“I’m sorry,” he said gruffly. “It’s just… she’s just…”
“Everything,” she finished softly, and he nodded slowly.
“Exactly.”
They both sat staring at her, and even while Michael knew he could have stayed there forever, holding the baby in his arms as her little eyes became sleepy and started to close, he also knew that he had to say something, for this might be the last opportunity he ever had to make his dream come true.
“Adelaide?” he finally said, looking up at her, trying to show her his complete vulnerability. “I do not know if I did or said something that made you leave. If I did, I would do everything I could for the rest of my life to make amends. You only need to say the word to tell me how. For all I want, all I ask is, would you come back? Would you return to me? Be my wife?”
She stared at him, her eyes wide, panic filling them.
And he knew without her saying anything just what her answer would be.