Chapter 17
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
SAWYER
There’s something about someone knocking on my door that gives me anxiety.
I don’t know why. It’s like this built-in defense mechanism telling me something is wrong.
I’m practically shitting myself.
I open my nightstand, grabbing the little taser of Jane’s she’d given me. It’s pink with bejeweled beading around the outside. It may be small, but this thing sucks. I accidentally set it off once, and now I always hold it carefully.
Not a mistake I’m going to make again.
Jane has pictures of me on the ground after it happened, I just know it.
BANG BANG BANG.
“What the hell?” Moving the small curtain, I see Aiden slumped against my door.
“Holy shit.” I open it and catch him as he falls into me.
I set the taser down on my table. No accidents.
“Are you okay?” His naturally tan skin is pallid and gray, his lip swollen and split in the corner. Bruises cradle his eye.
“I’m sorry. I should have—” Holding him upright, I bring him inside and shut the door then lock it. Helping him through to the living room, I move him gently, settling my hand on his lower back.
“Fuck!” He flinches away from me.
Stunned, I don’t know what happened, but then I see my hand painted with red. Then his shirt.
“Holy shit, Aiden, what happened to you?”
“I’m sorry.” He braces his hand on my couch, trying to breathe. “I’m going to throw up.”
I grab him, leading him to the sink. It’s not the best option, but it’s the closest. I turn away as he retches, folding into the sink as he heaves.
He’s so weak, his toned arms struggling to hold himself up, and he sinks his head into the crook of his elbow resting on the edge of the sink.
I look at my red-stained hand. I’m going to be sick myself.
Shaking, I step closer to him carefully as he turns on the sink, letting it rinse his sick away. “I’m sorry.”
“You’ve said.” I don’t know what to do. What is going on? Fear grips me. “You need a hospital.”
“No!” He swallows. “No, I . . . I just, I need . . . help.” Shame seems to cloud his eyes.
Gently, I lift his head to look at me. “Hey.” My fingers slowly touch his face, careful not to touch the cuts and bruises. “I got you. You’re safe.” Is he? What is he even running from?
I’m not a violent guy, but one time in college I found out my sister’s ex tried to drug and assault her and I nearly killed him.
Would have if Hunter hadn’t stepped in. My poor friend suffered a black eye from yours truly by accident.
He still gives me shit about it.
Right now, I’d unleash the same fury on anyone trying to hurt Aiden. “If you don’t want to go to the hospital, I need to see how bad it is.” His blood is drying on my hand. “We have to get you to the bathroom.” I notice some blood dripping onto the floor.
I lead him to my bathroom, his eyes drooping.
“I would ask you on a scale of one to ten how much pain you’re in, but I can see we’re a solid ten out of ten.” He gives me a weak smile. I grab the shitty towels I use to clean with, then I wash my hands. “I need to see, okay? We need to take your shirt off.”
Aiden huffs, defeated, before nodding. I grab the medicine kit. I have lots of gauze and bandages in here. I just hope they’re enough. Slowly I help him, lifting off his shirt, and my hand goes to my mouth to stop the noise that crawls up my throat.
Aiden leans forward against the bathroom sink, his head in the crook of his arm, hiding his face and shaking violently. I don’t know what to do. I need something, someone. This is beyond a fight, beyond a simple argument.
This is punishment. “Aiden.” I touch his arm gently, willing him to stand up. “I have to clean this, or you have to go to the hospital.”
His eyes harden and he straightens with a nod.
My heart is breaking. Seeing him crumble is almost as jarring as the lashes across his back. “Okay.”
“I think you need to sit in the bathtub while I do this. There’s so much blood.
You can keep your boxers on, but just sit in the tub.
I’ll be right back, okay?” Needing some space, I leave him to undress and go to my bedroom.
I search through my drawers for a dark-colored shirt and a pair of boxers.
My hands won’t stop shaking, but it’s nothing compared to his trembling. Shock, probably.
Seeing him like this is shaking me. It’s not just the injuries, it’s his demeanor. I’m not used to seeing him so vulnerable.
“Get it together. He needs you.”
Making my way back down the hall, I peek into the bathroom at Aiden sitting in the tub, his battered back to me. “I got you some clothes to change into.”
“I shouldn’t have come here. I just got in my car and next thing I knew I was here.” His words are choked and shaky. I rest a hand softly on his shoulder.
“We’re friends, right?” He looks up at me. “Right?”
His brow furrows before his violet eyes dart away.
I see the slight nod of his head, though.
I see him sway; the adrenaline must be fading.
He’s going to sleep like the dead. “This is going to hurt.” A lot.
“I need to clean you up and see how deep the cuts are.” I won’t mention a hospital yet, but if he needs stitches, I am not equipped for that.
I turn on the water in the tub and wait for it to warm up. “I’ll wash your clothes once we’re done here.”
Aiden nods, looking at the kit I have laid out on the edge of the tub. “You have a mini doctor’s office in here.”
I smirk. “You know how many times I’ve cut or burned myself?
Hazard of the job. Always prepared for the worst since I live alone.
” Taking a deep breath, I steel my spine.
I’m not usually squeamish, but I know this is going to be bad.
“I’m going to clean you up now. Do you want like something to squeeze? I don’t have any alcohol or I’d—”
He shakes his head. I hate this. I grab the cup I brought, filling it with lukewarm water. “Want to hold my hand? I’m just rinsing the blood away.” After a moment he reaches out for my hand, and I take his cold hand in mine, giving him a reassuring squeeze.
With a wince of my own, I pour warm water down his back. He clenches my hand in his. “Fuck,” he grounds out.
“I’m sorry.” Taking another cup of water, I keep washing away the blood.
My eyes well with tears I try to blink away.
What the hell happened to this man? I swallow.
“What happened?” I continue cleaning the blood away, but a lot of it seems to have clotted.
It’s hard to clean like this with one hand, but the grip on my fingers tells me he needs it.
“How bad is it?”
No way. I’m not letting him ignore my question. Aiden grits his teeth as another cup of water flows down his back. What’s left is angry red lashes and thick raised welts, at least seven. Some dripping blood. “What happened, Aiden?” I say again quietly.
“Nothing.”
I freeze. “You can’t come to my doorstep like this and expect me to just let it go.” I want to hurt whoever did this. “Tell me what happened. You’re safe, okay? I’m not going to say a word.”
Aiden opens his mouth, choking back a sob.
His fingers slip from mine to cover his face.
This is too much. Seeing him like this is messing with my head.
It’s jarring, and so fucking scary. Patiently, I wait for him to compose himself while I clean his back with both hands.
The good news is, no stitches. The bad news .
. . it’s terrible. I’m guessing a belt or strap of some kind.
After watching him fight, it’s hard to picture anyone getting the upper hand on him.
“I’m not supposed to have my sister.”
“What?”
“Katya, when she was here earlier and Koda dropped her off. He had an emergency, and he was supposed to come back to get her. He didn’t. I’m not allowed to have her alone. Koda got held up, so I had to take her back myself. To their father.”
“Their father?”
Aiden nods. “He’s not my dad. He’s their father. He hates me. He keeps her from me to hurt me. But Koda never came back, so I had to take her home. Their father did this, because I had her.”
My mind tries to wrap around such cruelty. “Why can’t you take her out?”
“Because he hates me. He hates me.” Aiden shakes his head. “Katya and I have the same mother. He’s always hated me.”
I hate to ask, but I finally have him talking. Just a little. “And you’re still there even though your mom passed away. Right?”
He nods. “She died when Katya was two.” I don’t want to ask how, even though I’m curious. Aiden seems like he’s barely holding it together.
“I’m sorry.” Grabbing a cloth, I try as gently as I can to clean the rest of the blood. “Is she safe with him?”
Aiden’s quiet for a moment, and I let him think while I work.
I think I have enough bandages. Luckily the wounds aren’t as bad as I anticipated, though some are deeper than others.
I smear antibacterial ointment on one of the wide bandages and smooth it on gently.
He hisses. “I know, sorry. Good news is, they aren’t as deep or big as I thought. ”
Aiden nods. “She’s safe, but um, I don’t really trust him.
She shouldn’t be in that house.” Aiden looks up.
“It’s one of the reasons I need money. I want to try and save enough and then attempt to get custody of her.
” He laughs sharply. “I’m fucking dreaming, but I’m doing my best. I do what I have to. ”
“The fighting?”
“Huh?”
“The boxing. Is that why you do it?”
“Yeah,” he says softly.
I place the last bandage over his wounds. I’ll have to change them tomorrow. I’ll go down to the store at some point to get more supplies. I’m closed for another week, so maybe having Aiden here will be a good thing. He can help me finish setting up for the event.
Wait, why am I just assuming he’s staying?
“You’re all set. I uh . . . I’ll have to run out tomorrow to grab more supplies so I can change these.
” Just ask him. “Assuming you’re staying here.
” Aiden’s head picks up. “You can. I um, I want you to. But if you can’t, I understand.
” I want to keep an eye on his back, but selfishly, also, I like him.
A lot.
And I want him here. I want him safe.
“I’ve bothered you enough.”
“You don’t bother me.” Aiden looks at me flatly and I can’t help but smile.
The swelling on his face has gone down some, the cut and bruises mottling the side of his face making his scar stand out more.
Did Ivan do that too? What else has this man experienced at his hand? “Stay. As long as you need to.”
Aiden swallows then nods. “If you’re sure?”
“More than sure.” I stand, reaching out a hand to him, and he takes it, standing up in the tub, his boxers dripping. I help him out. “Get changed. Just bring your boxers out and I’ll throw them in with the rest of your clothes, okay?”
I leave him to change, needing space myself.
I sit on my bed, head in my hands, trying to ease my stomach. I’m feeling sick. I don’t know what I’m doing. I look down and realize I’m still in my briefs, but I don’t feel like changing. No blood on me at least.
I can still smell the metallic tang.
Aiden steps into my room a moment later, and seeing him in my clothes knocks something loose inside my chest. It’s only my black T-shirt and boxers, but still. He looks down and I follow his gaze, down his legs dusted with dark hair to his bare feet.
He looks so casual. So different. Almost boyish. If I remember correctly, Aiden is in his mid-twenties, but like this he seems younger.
All his sharp edges, clean dress clothes, and scowl are gone.
It’s just him. Raw and vulnerable.
I reach my hand out and watch the war in his mind before he reaches for it, letting me tug him toward me.
He steps between my legs and I’m at a loss.
I want to take his pain away, but I can’t.
Instead, I gently grab him and hug his body.
My arms wrap around him, and I feel his fingers climb into my hair when I lay my head against his stomach. Then I look up at him.
“I should probably go—”
“Shut up, Aiden.” I laugh, pulling him gently into my lap, and watch him melt into my arms. I’m careful to rest my hands on his lower back where there are no lashes.
I look up at him. Sleepy violet eyes laced with pain.
I have nothing strong for him to take. The painkillers I did give him will only soften it.
Maybe I could grab some CBD gummies or something to help ease his pain away. “How bad is it?”
“It burns.” He swallows. “It’s manageable.”
I nod, kissing the middle of his chest. “Do you think you can sleep?”
“I’m not sure.” While he says that his heavy eyes say otherwise.
“What if it’s in bed with me? In my arms?” While I hold him tight and make him realize he’s not alone. That I won’t hurt him. I wouldn’t dream of it. I want him here with me. I don’t understand how fast I’ve fallen, but somehow this man has bled into me and I can’t let go of him. Not now.
Aiden gives me a tiny sleepy smile then leans down and shocks me with a soft kiss. His lips press against mine and he doesn’t move for a minute. My eyes close, then open when he pulls away. He smiles. “It’s worth a shot.”